So, I finished BTVS

And I’m like, dead.

It’s funny that a show brought me so many feelings? I mean, when I first started watching it, despite the fact that a lot of my friends had watched it and were super excited about it, I wasn’t really giving it much credit. It was a lot similiar to when I first watched Doctor Who - the visual effects were poor, the characters were ok but I still couldn’t see exactly why people were to into it. And I felt like that even as I finished season 1, which was nice, but far from spectacular.

And then, at some point, I realized I was watching 4 episodes a day and that I was thinking about it all the freaking time and omg-whats-gonna-happen-next. Characters who used to be my favorite just lost relevance (Angel, for one) and others that I didn’t expect to love just became my special babies (Anya). I had multiple confused mixed feelings about kind of everybody (hello, Spike) and I hated and loved them in such a speed that my heart just couldn’t take it. I laughed while I was crying and I cried both of joy and sadness. I thought countless times that it couldn’t get any worse and it did, and I wondered about the end so many times and when I finally reached the series finale (like 10 minutes ago) I just couldn’t belive it. I could’nt accept in my heart that that was it.

So, yeah, I kind of know why my friends love it so much now. I have no idea what to do with my life now it’s over. The idea of watching another show seems like a crime to me. I want more. I know there are comics and stuff (and where do I get them? No idea) but it’s not the same. I’m crushed. And I’ll never get over it.