A/N: Finally, here it is! Sorry it took a while, but thanks for being patient. x
It had been two weeks since you last saw Luke. You missed him, but after everything he said, you didn’t know what to do. You wanted to talk to him, but you knew how stubborn he would be. You hated yourself for wasting so much time with guys like Wyatt all because you could never admit how you truly felt about Luke. He said that he was always too late and this time, you were the one that was too late. You were thinking that he was probably out on another date with Natalie and the idea of them being together broke your heart. This must have been how he felt and you hated yourself even more because you knew that you were the one who put him through it. You were always afraid of losing Luke and now, it might have actually happened. You didn’t know when or if he would speak to you or see you again because he said that he was tired of loving you and needed to move on. You didn’t want him to get over you, but a part of you would accept it if he did because after what you put him through, you felt like you didn’t deserve him. You kind of knew what you were doing to him, but you never knew just how far you were taking it. You knew how he felt and you unintentionally led him on every time you called and said you needed him. After all the bullshit that you’ve gone through, you just needed to know that you still and would always have Luke. You didn’t expect your feelings for him to take over as often as they did, and for it to all turn out like this.You never meant to hurt him.
Luke was missing you just as much. He never got a second date with Natalie because she was aware that she could never replace the one he truly loved. During their first and only date, she sensed that there was a lot on his mind and offered to listen if he wanted to talk about it. He didn’t think that it’d be fair to her if he just pretended that he was fine and was having a good time on their date, so he told her the truth about how he was feeling. When Luke admitted that he was in love with someone else and that he wanted to move on from it, she just knew that even after all the shit he had been through, he wasn’t quite ready. For the past two weeks, all Luke could think about was you. He wanted to call you and apologize for the way he yelled at you, and go back to being best friends with you, but he knew that it would only make things worse for himself at the moment. He didn’t know if things would ever go back to the way that they were now that you finally knew the truth, but he wanted you to always be a part of his life. Even if he couldn’t have you in the way that he wanted. He just needed to take some time away from you to forget a little bit about how he felt, until he was sure that he’d be okay.
Another week had gone by and you still hadn’t seen or heard anything from Luke. You sat on your bed, staring at the red flannel that draped over the chair by your desk. It was Luke’s and you wondered if it was a good idea for you to return it to him directly. It would be an excuse for you to see him, you thought. But you didn’t want to just see him, you wanted to talk to him, and you worried that he would only push you away because he was still upset. You decided to just try anyways because you really missed him and you were desperate to tell him the truth. You weren’t used to not having your best friend around, especially without speaking at least once a day. Three weeks without him was long enough, you didn’t know if you could handle another. So you went to his apartment to return the shirt and to tell him that you were in love with him too. If it didn’t end well, at least he would know.
You knocked on his apartment door and waited nervously, gripping the shirt in your hands. Even though Luke admitted to being in love with you, you didn’t know how he would react once you told him that you felt the same way, considering how upset he was with you a few weeks ago. You grew more nervous every second, you thought about running before the door opened, but you needed to tell him. You realized that you had been waiting a little longer than usual and thought maybe it was a sign that you shouldn’t tell him now. But as you turned to walk away, the door flew open. You looked up and as your eyes met his tired, blue ones, he froze. He felt his heart beating quicker as he stared at you, not knowing what to do. A part of him wanted to apologize and pull you into hug, but another part of him wanted to shut the door in your face.
"Hey," you said nervously. "Can I come in?"
Luke hesitated for a moment, but nodded without saying a word and stepped aside.
You walked in and when you heard the door shut, you turned around to face him. You studied the look on his face and knew that he hadn’t been getting much sleep lately, just like you. You bit down on your lip before letting out a breath. "How have you been?"
"Okay," he answered quietly, looking down.
"How was that date?" You asked.
Luke let out a wry laugh, "Let’s just say that I won’t be able to go on another date without the girl knowing that I’m already in love with someone else."
"Sorry…" You mumbled.
He shrugged without saying another word, causing a short silence between the two of you.
You cleared your throat, breaking the silence. You looked down at the shirt in your hands, "I just wanted to give back your flannel." You held it out and set it down on the sofa beside you. "The last time I was here, I took it from your closet to borrow."
He stared at the red fabric, still avoiding to make eye contact with you, "Is that all?"
"No…" you sighed, "I was actually hoping that we could talk since I couldn’t even get a word in the last time we spoke."
"I didn’t want you to waste your breath," he replied. "I know you don’t feel the same way."
"Luke," you begged.
He threw his hands up and finally looked at you, "Fine. Go ahead. I’m listening."
"I’m not with Wyatt," you started. "He asked if we could meet up and I only agreed because I thought it would be good for me to get a few things off my chest so that I could finally let go of whatever it was that we had. He asked for another chance, but I said no. I don’t miss or love him and I wanted him to see that, I wanted him to know that there was nothing he could do to make me come back. I haven’t seen him since that day you saw me with him in the cafe."
He shrugged again, though he felt bad for taking your meeting with Wyatt out of context. "It doesn’t change what I said or how I feel."
You looked at him sadly, "I don’t blame you. I know I hurt you, but believe me, that was never my intention. I didn’t mean for it to go as far as it did."
His brows furrowed, "Wait, what?"
You paused for a moment. "I’ve always known how you felt about me."
He shook his head, "So you’ve known this whole time and didn’t bother to say anything? You just let me look like a fool this entire time?"
"No, I—" you breathed shakily. "Yes, I knew and I didn’t say anything, but it was because I didn’t want to hurt you since I didn’t feel the same way."
Luke scoffed, "You did hurt me either way."
"I know," you repeated, "and I’m sorry. When I first realized that you had feelings for me, I didn’t feel the same way. But now…" You trailed off, tears threatening to fall.
"But what? Are you trying to say that the feeling is mutual now ever since I told you? Just to make me feel better?" He glared, “If so, save it.”
"I am in love with you, Luke,” you confessed, you voice wavering.
He stared at you in disbelief, shaking his head. "I don’t know if I believe you."
"I’m telling the truth," you said as a tear rolled down your cheek. "I felt this way for a long time. It may not have been for as long as you did, but it’s been three years since I first realized how I felt."
He took a step closer to you, anger starting to build up inside of him, "Why didn’t you ever tell me this?"
"I was scared," you answered. "You were my best friend and I was afraid of what would happen."
"Were you afraid that I would hurt you or leave you?" He questioned. "You know I would never."
You wiped away your tears, "At first, I thought that’s what I was afraid of, but I was actually more worried that I would mess it up," you admitted. “You’ve become the most important person in my life and I didn’t want to risk losing you. I have a habit of screwing up every relationship that I’ve ever been in, you know that.”
He disagreed, "You’re not the one who screws up, Y/N. I have told you over and over, those guys just didn’t know how to appreciate you. They couldn’t see how perfect you were."
You chuckled softly, "Even when you’re supposed to be mad at me, you still tell me that I’m perfect. That’s why I don’t deserve you… I have always said that I wanted someone like you because I knew that it was you that I couldn’t have.”
"What are you saying?" Luke asked, his bit of anger suddenly fading away.
"When I first realized that I had feelings for you, I ignored it. I kept telling myself that it wasn’t real because I decided that I couldn’t be with you. So I dated those guys sometimes as a distraction or because I actually thought that they could replace you." You went on as the tears continued to rush down your face, "But they never could… Instead, all they did was hurt me. So every time something went wrong and I was hurting, I called you because I needed to know that I still had you. You told me everything that I needed to hear. You told me that you would always be there for me, and hearing that made me feel better. I didn’t want to lose that so I just thought that I couldn’t have you in the way that I truly wanted. When my heart was broken, you did fill the void that I felt, but I never meant to make it look like that’s all you were ever good for, or that was all I needed you for. My feelings for you just kept growing stronger everyday and I continued to deny them. You were always so good to me while I never realized what I was actually doing to you. That’s why I don’t deserve you,” you said again. You scoffed, "It’s funny… I never told you how I felt because I was afraid of how it would all turn out, and everything that I feared would happen, happened. I still managed to screw things up with you. I hurt you and I know that at this point, I’ve lost everything that we ever had."
Luke thought for a moment as he ran a hand through his hair. "Why are you telling me this now?"
"I tried telling you the last time we talked, but you wouldn’t let me—"
He cut you off, "No. I mean… If you couldn’t tell me before, why are you telling me now?”
"Because I’m tired," you cried. "After what Wyatt did, after all the trouble I put myself through just to find someone else, I’m tired of refusing to see how I truly feel. I could never admit my feelings towards you, even to myself all because I was scared. For the first time, I can actually admit that I’m in love with you because I’m just so fucking tired of denying it. I’m tired of wasting my time with idiots like Wyatt when everything that I have ever wanted is right in front of me. I’m telling you now because I’m finally willing to take the chance and be with you if that’s what you want too. I know you would never hurt me, I can see how much you love me. You were always there for me, even after what I put you through. I was stupid for being so damn paranoid because I know now that the only reason why my past relationships never worked out was because they were never you, Luke. I’ll never love anyone as much as I love you,” you said through tears.
Luke opened his mouth to speak, but only let out a sigh. He looked down, rubbing his eyes to stop his own tears.
You cried harder, thinking that things have changed. Before speaking again, you took a few deep breaths to calm yourself. "I know this is all crazy. I know how badly I messed up so I understand if you still want to move on. I just wanted you to know that I miss you. And that I love you. I’m so sorry for any pain that I’ve caused. I wish I could take it all back…" You waited for him to look up at you again and say something, and when he didn’t, you took it as your cue to leave. "I’m sorry. I know I’m a little late, but I just wanted you to know how I feel. Sorry…" You continued to wipe away your tears as you walked past him to leave.
"Y/N." Luke grabbed your hand, "Wait!"
You turned around instantly and looked at him as he let go.
He stared at you for a moment then let out a frustrated sigh. "I…" He ran his fingers through his hair again, letting out another breath before cupping your face as he crashed his lips onto yours. A few seconds later, he pulled away and looked at you as he whispered, "You can’t lose me or whatever we have if I’m still here… I can’t move on. I’ve been trying for the past three weeks, but my feelings for you haven’t changed at all. I just love you too much. And now that I know the truth, I’d be a fool if I walked away." He pressed his forehead against yours as he held your face in his hands. "I miss you too and being without you has been awful. I don’t know what it is about you, Y/N. I don’t know what you did to me." He chuckled softly through tears, "I’ll always be right here even if it kills me because no matter what, I can never stop loving you. You shouldn’t have to worry about losing me either because it’s been five years and I never gave up on you. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t."
You looked down as tears continued to fall from your eyes, "I just don’t know if I can forgive myself for hurting you the way that I did."
"Did you mean everything that you just told me? Do you really love me?"
You nodded, looking into his eyes, "Yes."
He smiled softly, "Then it’s okay, I forgive you. What you did doesn’t change the way that I feel. I’m still madly in love with you. You said that you were willing to take the chance and be with me if it’s what I wanted. Well, I want this. I want you. I don’t care what you did because I know you didn’t have bad intentions. All that matters now is that we both know how we truly feel about each other."
You nodded again as you whispered, "Okay… Then this is what I want too."
"I love you," he said happily as he leaned in.
You smiled widely, saying, "I love you too," just before his lips met yours once again.
After talking with Luke, you both went straight to his bedroom where you changed into one of his shirts like you used to. You spent the rest of the day cuddling with him in bed to make up for the three weeks that you missed together. "I missed this," Luke said as you nuzzled closer to him. You told him that you missed it too — the feeling you got every time you held him close — and you never wanted to let him go ever again. He went on about all the things he missed about having you around which included seeing you in his shirts, watching movies all day, and just talking about literally anything for hours. It had only been three weeks, but because you were both used to talking or spending basically everyday together, it felt like it had been three months.
You and Luke were beginning to feel tired after hours of talking so he suggested that you both get some rest. You tried to sleep but for some reason, you couldn’t. You noticed that it was only 7 pm and thought maybe that was the reason. You looked up at Luke, seeing that his eyes were closed. You thought he was sleeping so you stared at him in adoration, feeling lucky that you had him.
"I can feel you staring at me," Luke muttered with his eyes shut. "What is it?" He asked, opening his eyes.
You shrugged. "Nothing. I just I can’t believe how long it took for us to finally be together," you chuckled.
"It wouldn’t have taken so long if you weren’t so stubborn," he joked. You pouted and he laughed, "Only kidding, babe. Maybe it was a good thing. I mean, it made us realize how much we really love each other."
You smiled, "I’m glad that I have you because for once, I’m actually really happy."
"I am too," he replied as he grabbed your hand and kissed the back of it.
"I don’t know how I got so lucky even after… everything. I don’t deserve you."
"Stop," he frowned. "I love you. I already told you, that’s in the past now and it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t change things."
You sighed, "I know."
"Please don’t let this get in the way, babe. Believe me, all I care about now is that I have you."
You nodded as you played with his fingers, "Okay."
He bit down on his lip, "Now, tell me that you love me. I wanna hear you say it again."
"I love you," you said, looking into his eyes.
"One more time?" He smiled.
You giggled, "I love you, Luke."
"One more time," he repeated, laughing.
You shook your head before pressing your lips against his, causing him to smile in the kiss. Without breaking the kiss, he gripped your waist and turned you over on your back so that he was on top. Your fingers tangled in his hair as he deepened the kiss, gently placing a hand on your cheek. Your lips continued to move against his, slowly and in sync. "I love you, Luke Hemmings. So. Much," you mumbled against his lips.
He broke the kiss and looked down at you with a smile, his thumb brushing against your bottom lip. "I love you too, Y/N. More than anything in the world."