since people are posting now anyway

The “Reflective Motive” Theory (or ‘John Williams is a sneaky bastard’)

Ok heres some really cool easter egg I found in the TFA soundtrack. I already made a post about this but I did some more research, consulted with some people, and I’m a bit better informed now (since I’m not much of a musician myself).

right. so. there’s this section of Rey’s theme called the ‘Reflective Motive’. 

It plays most prominently when Rey’s sat eating her meal outside her AT-AT home watching that ship fly up through Jakku’s atmosphere. Kind of a mirror to the moment in Rey’s vision where a younger version of her watches the ship that abandoned her fly away - its used to reference her loneliness. ‘reflective’ could mean she’s ‘reflecting’… or it might be more literal.

Rey’s Reflective motive is literally a reflection of the Han and Leia love theme.

The structure is ultimately the same, they have the same kind of step-wise motion toward the end, but what’s interesting is the keys are the exact corresponding major and minor keys for each other. And while the Love Theme is ascending the Reflective Motive is descending. Williams literally took Han and Leia’s Theme and flipped it on it’s head - creating a more wistful sound compared to the love theme which is meant to be compelling/passionate.

This reminded me of when I was informed that a section of Rey’s theme backward becomes a section Kylo’s theme - so this is a similar twist using the original music.

But what does it mean? Well Williams could just have done this to simply convey the Lack of love in Rey’s life or (bear with me) its a bit more complicated than that, especially since it was named the ‘reflective’ motive - and this is a little hint at who her parents are. It would be a very clever way for him to inform the audience that it is a specific set of people who have failed to be there for her (although in that case I would suggest it was most likely not their choice that she was separated from them). Han and Leia’s love theme would then be flipped to communicate a lack of their love/a lack of their presence in Rey’s life.

i haven’t made a follow forever in like… a whole year, lol. a lot has changed since then. i’ve switched fandoms, changed urls more times than i can remember, and met a lot of new people. but now 2016′s nearly over, so here’s some people and blogs that i love to pieces no matter what (i’m following over 700 blogs so i may have forgotten a couple of you, sorry ;-; i still love you all anyways)! here you all go ❤️

a-e

@abloodneed @abluelightinthedark @alberticorosende @albertodominic @alecmagnu @amorverus @auclizzy @banelewis @banesfuture @banshee-cheekbones @bassian @bigskydreaming @canislytherinthings @captainholt @cclizzy @chenjpeg @claryfightwood @clizzywiki @cutiequeercris @davidalleynes @deerestalec @demiromanticmickey @descentury @discos @doddario @draeden @etherealclizzy

f-j

@f-f-f-fight @festivefairchild @finnnorgana @fraywoodbane @gayscifi @gogotomaqos @harrys-shums @hcrryshumjr @highwarlockkareena @hirohamadas @hohodaddario @hoteldumorts @hufflepufflightwood @illtoucheverystarinthesky @irisvwest @izlitwood @izzybabewoods @jmesbarnes @jxdyhxpps

k-o

@k2so @kanjiklubs @khylinrhambo @latinalightwood @latinalightwood @light-bane @lucegarroway @lukegarrowayisamaincharacter @lukemagnus @magicalmagnus @magnusnaughtylist @magsbanes @maidmarians @mistletoe-magnus @mistletoedsaphael @mobiletoybox @mundanelion @nicholashemmick @nightfallgoddess @otppurefuckingmagic

p-t

@pansexual-izzy @pansimon @poesdamneron @poseyslegtattoo @protectdownworlders @protectraphaelsantiago @queerlyalex @quitemagicalbane @raphaelsantiagace @raphaelsantiagosavedhimself @s-lewis @saphaelismyjam @sassysantiago @scottmccute @siimonsfangs @simon-jaces @sleepy-skittles @softjace @softjimon @softsnowyjace @spookysimon @sugarplummeliorn @thelushfiles

u-w

@uhura @vampclan @virginalec @vlctoraldertree @warlocksrune @whipsandredlips @wolffcks

chichi2000fgh  asked:

EYYY NACHO, ff9 just went on sale for 10 bucks, so im buying it. does this count as a valentines day gift?

i cannot believe just a few hours after i said, “buy ffix if it goes on sale,” it’s actually 50% off. 

THIS IS THE IDEAL VALENTINE’S GIFT.

this post is ffix propaganda post. go buy ffix on steam since it’s on sale and the hd version is gorgeous. 

Starscream Essay

Context: I wrote an essay on Starscream being a victim of abuse for the final assignment of my college English 101 class. I wish I could have gone into more detail but I did have a page limit. I realized I could not send this to people via tumblr, so I am just going to post it here. The beginning is an introduction to Transformers, which I had to include since my audience for the paper (my professor) was unfamiliar with the topic, so ignore that. Anyway, here it is! 

Side Note: I got a 93% on this garbage! Super happy about that. 

@tyrantofthefirmament @sosstarscream

Starscream: An Unrecognized Abuse Victim

           In 1984, Hasbro created the Transformers brand. Now, thirty-two years later, the brand is internationally recognized and has more than 10 cartoon series under its name. These Transformers series are dominantly known for their alien robot characters who can transform into machines, usually vehicles or aircraft. The Transformers can be divided into stereotypical sides of good and evil: Autobots and Decepticons. Among the most consistent and popular characters across the different cartoons is the Deception second-in-command, Starscream. Known for constantly trying to gain control of the Decepticons under the leader, Megaton’s, olfactory sensors, Starscream can be described as a liar, a coward, a sycophant, cunning, and narcissistic. What he is not frequently recognized for, however, is an abuse victim, despite being one of the strongest models of abuse over the years. In fact, most of his previously-described characteristics result from consistent abuse. In the animated series Transformers: Prime (TFP), Starscream suffered explicit transgressions by Megatron and other characters that need to be addressed. Some people think this treatment is due to his unbecoming behavior and that the resulting aggression from other characters is not abuse, but well-deserved punishment. That way of thinking, however, is a form of victim blaming to justify his suffering. In reality, Starscream is an unrecognized model of physical, psychological, and emotional abuse. 

           Starscream’s enduring of physical trauma is the most recognizable form of abuse presented in TFP. Physical abuse can be defined as the intentional use of force against a person in a way that injures or endangers them (Smith). On many occasions Megatron uses beatings as a way to control Starscream and keep him in line. The most famous example of this is when Megatron, in the episode “Out of His Head,” after emerging from stasis, foregoes his opportunity to destroy the Autobots just to go after Starscream (Kurtzman). Upon his arrival, Megatron states that it would be a miracle if Starscream survives what he has planned, only to drag him away by his head as Starscream pleads and screams in resistance. The following episode starts by showing Starscream in a coma, injuries littering his body and Megatron taking pride in the damage done. In the episode “Darkness Rising, Part 4” Megatron beats Starscream and tries to crush him with his foot for simply disobeying orders. It is also important to mention that during the episode “Rock Bottom” Megatron tries to kill Starscream, claiming he has outlived his usefulness.

Megatron, however, is not the only one who unjustifiably terrorizes Starscream. In “Minus One,” the Decepticon scientist, Shockwave, grabs Starscream and tries to impale him while Megatron watches, waiting to see how things play out. Starscream is so used to being abused that in “Patch” he tells Megatron “a really good trouncing usually straightens me out, doesn’t it” when trying to avoid termination. There are more examples of abuse throughout the show, and it can be insinuated that Starscream is beaten beyond what is animated, by the way he flinches at any sign of anger or agitation Megatron has towards him .

           Starscream is one of the most emotionally expressive characters in TFP. His radical changes in emotion, especially anger and aggression, make him unpredictable and dangerous. While this may seem like this true character, it is likely that these traits were brought on by extended periods of physical abuse. Victims of abuse are often more emotionally expressive, but in an uncontrolled manner, especially when it comes to anger and aggression (Keene). It has also been reported through extensive research that those exposed to childhood physical abuse “reported significantly higher levels of narcissistic vulnerability and shame-proneness” than those who have who have not experienced abuse (Keene). While Starscream may not have had a childhood, he was exposed to something similar: millions of years of physical abuse, long enough to affect the development of his personality into that of one who is very self-centered and hostile. Starscream’s narcissism is so overreaching that in the episode titled “Armada” he makes clones of himself, his idea of the perfect soldiers (Kurtzman). The display of such character traits is likely a subconscious self-protective function to shield himself from painful emotions, as well as a way to keep a positive self-image (Keene).

           Psychological abuse and emotional abuse are closely related, but distinctly different. The former occurs when threats are used to cause fear in a person as a tool for manipulation and gaining control whereas the latter occurs when something is said or done to make a person feel stupid or worthless (“Types of Violence and Abuse”). Megatron psychologically abuses all his subordinates by constantly making threats of termination or physical suffering if they do not do his bidding and in a timely manner. Megatron is a stereotypical abuser, using the fear of others to his advantage. He does not need to kill Starscream or any of the Decepticons, just make them think he will enough to get in their heads and eliminate any thought of rebellion, which is easy to see. This is to be expected, however, given that “clinical reports have indicated that ridicule, verbal harassment, and name-calling (e.g., public humiliation) are present in some physically abusive relationships. The function of this type of verbal abuse appears to be one of control” (Follingstad). The control happens through making the victim feel they are not worthwhile or strong enough to change things, thus leaving the power within the hands of the psychological abuser.

The emotional abuse of Starscream at the hands of Megatron and some of the other characters is more difficult to reveal, despite being one of the most destructive forms of abuse (Follingstad). One example of emotional abuse thrust upon Starscream by Megatron occurs in a TFP episode titled “Thirst.” Starscream goes to inform Megatron of important information involving events that will unfold, only to be blown off by the Decepticon leader. At the time, Megatron was talking via a communication system to Shockwave, who presumably hears Starscream and asks who it was. Megatron answers with “no one important” (Kurtzman). Despite Starscream being second-in-command, Megatron makes him feel worthless to the cause, and even worse, unimportant to him. This is one reason as to why emotional abuse is so destructive to victims, because it “destroys their ability to feel good about themselves. This might, in turn, render them more helpless and worthless in their own eyes” (Follingstad). Another time emotional abuse is evident is during “Darkness Rising, Part 5” in which Megatron states: “Optimus Prime never disappoints. Unlike you, Starscream ” (Kurtzman). Not only is Starscream not good enough for Megatron, but he cannot please him, even in his best efforts.

Acknowledgement of Starscream’s abuse is not widely recognized for two major reasons: there is this perception that he deserves the treatment, and because of the fact that it takes place on a child’s television show. In regards to the first reason, while Starscream’s actions are not favorable, they are not without reason. Starscream’s actions are not the cause for his punishment, more, his punishment is the cause of his actions.  Starscream is constantly seeking to get revenge on Megatron by killing him, because anger is at the core of revenge fantasies, along with other emotions that include “fear that no rescuer can be trusted, despair over the harshness of the world, and a general disgust with the injustices of the world” (Horowitz). This concept of revenge is very persistent as well, which explains why, even after beatings, Starscream continues to peruse such endeavors. “The victim can feel good about gaining a sense of power and control by planning vengeance and may experience pleasure at imagining the suffering of the target…self-righteous indignation feels like energy or fuel for the self. The burning of this fuel helps people feel solid and coherent rather than frail or empty” (Horowitz). By Megatron constantly making Starscream feel worthless by diminishing and belittling him, as well as physically abusing him, Megatron is actually creating this need for revenge inside of Starscream that results in his constant treachery. Although this does not justify his actions, it does explain why they occur, and how they could be stopped beyond physical means.

As mentioned before, many of the show’s viewers like to claim that Starscream is deserving of his treatment, but the abuse actually is more damaging than beneficial. “People have a need to Believe in a Just World (BJW) in which people get what they deserve. When people are confronted with an event which threatens this BJW, people try to maintain their existing beliefs, for example, by blaming the innocent victim ” (Loseman). Thus, when Starscream is beaten or ridiculed by Megatron, he is often stigmatized as “deserving-it” in order to protect this idea that the world, especially that of fiction, is perfect. As one who is always trying to seek revenge, Starscream is an easy scapegoat, even if his colleague, Knock Out, it just as ambitious and deceitful as he is. Similarly, humans like to connect two events of coincidence to each other with no evidence that they are related (Callan). This includes a “a person’s immoral action and his/her subsequent, unrelated misfortunes” (Callan). Whenever something bad happens to Starscream the belief is that it is his own fault, even if that is not the case.

The other argument is that such complex and adulterous situations, such as abuse of any form, are not likely to be truly presented in a child’s television show. Many see cartoons as a comedic outlet rather than one capable of presenting meaningful insight into deep socials issues (Abraham). However, “it is in the ability to engage in analytical communication about social events that cartoons can be said to provide discourses, as ways of knowing, that reflect deep social commentary rather than simply offering a simple passing glance at society and its issues” (Abraham). Cartoons can use conventional symbolism to create and build upon abstract ideas and make complex puzzles, thus showing the role of power and imagination in social and political life.  Transformers: Prime is not above doing such things. Even though it is a child’s show, death, disease, and destruction were all still shown, and the ideas of grief, loss, disability, and, as explained, abuse, are also present in the series. Cliffjumper, partner to Autobot Arcee, was brutally murdered in the very first episode, with Arcee struggling to accept and deal with this death throughout the series. Ratchet is clearly traumatized by the demise of his planet, and endlessly searches for a way to revive it. Bumblebee deals with the disability of not being able to speak. There is much more, but Starscream being an abuse victim is not so farfetched when looking at other concepts on the program.

           There is no doubt, Starscream suffers from constant physical, psychological, and emotional abuse. Making him an identifiable and public example of a victim might change how he is presented and give him a happy ending, thus providing hope to those who identify with him and his story. He has suffered beatings, ridicule, and belittlement, evident through his revenge fantasies, shame, and narcissistic personality. Any blame directed upon him usually results from people’s own insecurities that the world might not be a perfect and just place. Transformers: Prime is not a show that shies away from broadcasting big issues and as a cartoon can do so with much complexity, yet in a way that can resonate with children.  Identifying abuse in this cartoon, and others, is important. It is the job of those who watch the show to contact the writers and let them know that glorifying this behavior is not acceptable. It should be presented in a way that children can learn from. Hopefully Starscream can get his happy ending, showing hope for views who share a similar background that they can rise above their struggles and begin anew. Until then, his sacrifice for the development of the show shall be remembered.

Works Cited

Abraham, L. “Effectiveness of Cartoons as a Uniquely Visual Medium for Orienting Social Issues." Journalism & Communication Monographs 11.2 (2009): 117-65. Web. 24 Nov. 2016.

Callan, Mitchell J., Robbie M. Sutton, and Cristina Dovale. "When Deserving Translates into Causing: The Effect of Cognitive Load on Immanent Justice Reasoning." Journal of Experimental Social Psychology 46.6 (2010): 1097-100. ScienceDirect. Web. 24 Nov. 2016.

Follingstad, Diane R., Larry L. Rutledge, Barbara J. Berg, Elizabeth S. Hause, and Darlene S. Polek. "The Role of Emotional Abuse in Physically Abusive Relationships." Journal of Family Violence 5.2 (1990): 107-20. Web. 18 Nov. 2016.

Horowitz, Mardi J. "Understanding and Ameliorating Revenge Fantasies in Psychotherapy." American Journal of Psychiatry 164.1 (2007): 24-27. Web. 24 Nov. 2016.

Keene, Amanda C., and James Epps. "Childhood Physical Abuse and Aggression: Shame and Narcissistic Vulnerability." Child Abuse & Neglect 51 (2016): 276-83. Web. 18 Nov. 2016.

Kurtzman, Alex, Roberto Orci, and Jeff Kline, prods. Transformers: Prime. Hub Network. Television.

Loseman, Annemarie, and Kees Van Den Bos. "A Self-Regulation Hypothesis of Coping with an Unjust World: Ego-Depletion and Self-Affirmation as Underlying Aspects of Blaming of Innocent Victims." Social Justice Research 25.1 (2012): 1-13. Web. 24 Nov. 2016.

Smith, Melinda, M.A., and Jeanne Segal, Ph.D. "Domestic Violence and Abuse: Are You or Someone You Care About in an Abusive Relationship?" Helpguide.org Domestic Violence and Abuse. Nov. 2016. Web. 24 Nov. 2016.

"Types of Violence and Abuse | Violence Prevention Initiative." Gov.nl.ca Types. Government of Newfoundland and Labrador, 23 Oct. 2016. Web. 24 Nov. 2016.

it has been almost a year now since this blog has been created and i really wanted to reach out to my followers and say thank you!! (for noticing me!)

ヾ(^∇^) !!

as a comparison, this was an artwork i did showing how many followers i had (somewhere around september) in 2015!! (surprised how far this blog went o ^o)


but anyway, i just wanted to tell you wonderful people how much youve motivated me to draw more! i appreciate every one of you! ^ v^/! i will try my best to post more stuffies!

okay, so. i thought mlp season 5 was pretty decent overall. i liked a lot of it. but the finale was bad. this is not a particularly uncommon opinion, and it’s over a year old now, and since then we’ve had a whole nother season that i think people generally liked. but i’m gonna elaborate anyway!!

i like the premise. a villain trying to change the past so that the mane six weren’t destined to become friends? cool idea. i like that idea a lot. but boy did they fuck it up

even if you don’t watch mlp, you’ve probably heard about this one. because this is the one where they go to a bunch of “what if” post-apocalyptic timelines where various mlp villains succeeded in taking over the world

and shit gets weird, and it makes no goddamn sense

the changes to the present are completely random, just for the sake of showing a bunch of different weird, fanservicey “what if” scenarios that bring back all the big bads. starlight is only ever trying to prevent this one event (the first sonic rainboom) in slightly different ways. and they always return to the same time in the present. how does this lead to all these wildly different timelines where one particular villain takes over the world and the rest just aren’t a factor?

nightmare moon was the first villain the mane six stopped, so wouldn’t that mean she would always be the one who took over? what happened when nightmare moon returned in the other timelines, and why was it different? why is luna normal in the timeline where discord took over? why is sombra not a threat in the other timelines? the first alternate timeline shows that celestia had to commit the entire country to the war effort in order to keep his army at bay. why does ponyville just straight up not exist in some of these universes? why the fuck did the flim flam brothers take over ponyville in one of them????

what the FUCK happened here

then in the ending twilight shows starlight the error of her ways, and the mane six take pity on starlight and decide to make friends with her, and it’s quickly brushed over in a song

and of course, the WORST part of the episode is when starlight, in the past, teaches fluttershy’s childhood bullies that bullying is wrong (so that rainbow dash would never have to defend fluttershy and get challenged to race in the race where she did the first sonic rainboom), and twilight butts in and tries to stop her to preserve the timeline. you get this awful scene where twilight has to go “oh, well, of course bullying is wrong!“ but she can’t tell the kids that it will change the future because that would make no sense to them and it’s just bad. that is hands down one of the most unpleasant scenes in the history of mlp

somehow i started out this year with like, i want to say 200 followers and somehow i’m at 1.2k right now?? how did this happen? anyway, i’m not calling this a follow forever since i’ve followed some of you for two weeks and some of you since i started making real posts on this shithole blog a little over a year ago. also because some people i would definitely follow forever will probably get left out. but here goes: 

some cool assholes i met in real life 

@shitpostingperidot my one and only gorlfriend * @surullinensaukko my one and only gorlfriend’s roomie slash cool linguistics nerd * @fempai a very cool bean * @dracobaby another cool bean and like? my legit oldest friend at this point in my life??? wild, i love you jones * @boyjadzia a cool ds9 lovin’ bean * @moonwix naoma, a super cool bean  *  @piecesofbrokenrecollections la plus cool parmi tous les beans * @nyl0cke a cool cs genius bean * @gizarae @lockrum the beans who share my living space * @teajava and @mu5icliz literal wife goals

peaches 

@propergenius * @ormondsacker * @vivahate1988 * @femlockpng * @discosherlock * @bebybee * @sherrinfordholmes * @johnlck * @gregoryhouse * @peachyimg * @beaniesforspock * @clueingforlooks * @gayufo * @galpalkirk * @sherlocksbelstaff * @bokehjohnlock * @lesbianlupin * @aconissa * @doctorjohnwatson * @softos * @astrologv * @gemsherlock * @grumpybisexualtm * @lesdienne * @queerwatsn * @lestrads * @sherlock * @princelock * @culverton * @girljohn * @bbcjohnlock * @softviolin * @birdfluffs * @sherlockwatson* @shitelock * @sapphicsherlock * @pearlock * @citruspocket * @johnlocklesbians * @thelyingdetective * @femlocktm * @thetwelfthpanda * @tjlciseternal * @sapphicvelma * @butchsherlock * @chimpsinsocks if we’re friends on peach and you’re not in here it means i couldn’t find your url <3 

other cool people

@jimmyjanuary * @spockoandjimjim * @captain-liddy * @futchcassidy * @protodog * @emilociraptor * @bechdels * @sherolck * @loudest-subtext-in-tv * @basinhounds * @marsixm * @gnckirk * @shitlo * @nondeducible * @translock * @ciel-doux * @thejohnlockhell * @jon-lox * @glitterfutch * @softlavenders

my computer is lagging so bad i’m going to publish. if i forgot you it’s super not personal and please let me know so i can add you (basically if we’re mutuals and you’re not here i forgot you) i’m think you are all great! happy new year and happy johnlock! 

Alright, it is 1AM as I type up this post and I have converted my Minecraft blog into a shitposting blog 

From now on, I think it only makes sense if Sharkrocket stays an art blog since that’s what most people are following it for anyway, so I’m going to start moving my textposts and asks and replies and whatnot on to another blog

Find them at @hotmilky appropriately enough ahaha 

There I think I’ll ask for suggestions and ask all my hypothetical questions and get rude and lewd and what have you, so if that’s up your alley, that’s where you’ll find it 

Once again, @hotmilky

The Amazing Tour Is Not On Fire: “The Internet is here.”

Scorpio & Cancer Conversation
  • Cancer: I didn't realize I had so many pictures in my phone.
  • Scorpio: Really? You take pictures of everything. I saw you take a pic of a tree branch once. Come on.
  • Cancer: It was weird looking.
  • Scorpio: Ooooohkaayyy. I bet you haven't looked at it since. Anyway, where we going tonight?
  • Cancer: My sister told me about this place downtown. She said the food is good.
  • Scorpio: It's just us or other people?
  • Cancer: Just us for now....I might ask my coworker to come. I was gonna stay in the house tonight but this place sounds legit.
  • Scorpio: This coworker, is she cool? You always bringing random people around.
  • Cancer: Yeah, she's cool.
  • Scorpio: I'll take your word for it. You know I don't like.....random people.

I understand that good ol’ Modmad hasn’t been very cheery lately what with the whole Brexit uproar that’s been going on. I’m not from the UK so I can’t begin to fathom what people are going through over there. Anyway I hope this puts a smile on your face, on everyone one’s faces actually, even if it’s only for a little bit! Just smile!


As for this ridiculous comic all I can say is FINALYYYYYYY!!!! I’ve been working on it for a while now, ( 2 weeks tops?) I would’ve posted it sooner since this was supposed to be a sketchy comic but nooooooooooo, I just had to make it look–decent. Also you either understand the exchange here or you don’t. If you don’t tsk, tsk, tsk! :O (P.S. I LOVE DIAL! NEED MOAR OF HIM!!!)

If somebody wants to do the sequel to this be my guest cause I’m not Phew! >_0;

GALENTINE’S DAY

OMG. IT. IS. HERE. 

So I have to apologize to all my Galentine’s this year because between finals and…snow….I got very behind on my letters and they are not going into the mail until tomorrow. BUT to make up for it I decided to dedicate a post to you lovely medblrs that I have LOVED stalking these past few weeks and CAN NOT WAIT TO START FOLLOWING now that you know who I am (maybe I’m too into the whole ‘secret’ thing….haha). 

Anyway, as some of you know I LOVE giving people Taylor Swift Spirit Gifs. But since it is Galentine’s day - I am gifting all of these special medblrs with their very own LESLIE KNOPE SPIRIT GIFS. I hope you like them!!

@priorisn7

You are a powerful and strong force to be reckoned with. You are going to take over the world one day and you will be wearing amazing socks while doing so. Your Leslie Knope Spirit Gif is: 

@whisky–tango–foxtrot

I know you are feeling nervous right now but YOU ARE GOING TO BE A SURGEON and an amazing one at that. Whenever you need a boost of power just look at your Leslie Knope Spirit Gif for girl energy and you will be amazed at what you can accomplish: 

@verbsandadjectives

I saw that you were behind on Galentine’s as well and it made me feel a little better TBH. But ANYWAY - I am especially impressed by you because you are already on the wards kicking butt and taking names every single day. Your Leslie Knope Spirit Gif is: 

@collegiatelydreaming

You are sweet, fun, seemingly innocent (but ima suspect not so much in real life) and full of memes!!!! Seriously the best memes!! Your Leslie Knope Spirit Gif is: 

@modernathenamd

Ahh I’m dying right now because I can’t find this blog anymore :( If anyone knows what happened to this kick ass future family doc let me know! Anyway - for those of you wondering, her Leslie Knope Spirit Gif is: 

And that is all!!! Again, really really sorry that the mail is little behind, but expect something from yours truly in the next week. 

I hope your Galentine’s Days are merry and bright and full of waffles, the best things in life. 

The Second Dragon {Healing Arrow}

My first time posting a fic here. Oh dear, let’s see how this goes. Here’s my Hanzo/Mercy (Healing Arrow)

The Second Dragon is just a one-shot. Just two people subtly falling in love from a distance. I’m not sure how else to describe it… It’s different than most short stories I’ve written, but ya’ll probably wouldn’t know because I never post them, ha… anyway, I’ll shut up now.




He always just sat there alone.


Whether it was before or after combat, he was always alone. He bothered no other, and no other bothered him. That was how it was, and that was how it had always been since the team was formed. The only exception was during battle, where communication was key to success, but that was the only time in which he would engage in conversation, even though the talking was brief and urgent. He only spoke when spoken to; he never delved into anyone’s business, and whoever tried to get into his, he would be sure to shake the rattle and make them back off. Everyone knew his name, and everyone knew what he did; but that was all. That was it. Nothing more. Despite her feelings about him, it only made her more curious.

Keep reading

addiction

hello, this is the first time i’ve been willing to go into depth about my previous drug abuse. i’ve been getting a lot of questions about it so i thought i’d clear things up, especially since people have asked me if it’s heroin?????
anyway, the reason i’m hesitant about talking about the drug publicly is because it’s very readily available to anyone anywhere. in fact, anyone with allergies or sleeping problems probably has it in their house right now.
diphenhydramine (dph for short).
more commonly known as benadryl.
this isn’t a popular drug because
1.) it’s an otc that’s often overlooked
2.) the high is shitty as all hell
i’m not going to talk about the high too much, but here’s something.
think about the worst nightmare you’ve ever had. something that made you shoot up out of bed, wide awake, and sweating. that’s what a diphenhydramine trip is like. except there’s no comfort of waking up. you have to suffer through it for hours upon hours (unless you’re one of the sick fucks, like me, who enjoys it).
you’re completely delirious. you see, talk to, touch, feel, taste, smell things that aren’t there. the scariest part of the hallucinations is that you literally cannot distinguish what’s real and what’s not. the hallucinations are so realistic that you could be talking to thin air for hours because you think it’s your mom. one night when i took the highest dose i’d ever done, i sat on my bed talking to “someone” (wasn’t sure who. just a random stranger who i was, for whatever reason, okay with being in my house) (probably bc they weren’t real) for at least an hour, and when they asked me to get them something to drink, i got up, came back with it, and they were gone. you see things appear and reappear constantly. you feel spiders crawling all over your skin and you see shadow people watching you. on top of all of that, myoclonic seizures (small seizures) are pretty much a promise if you take high enough doses. i’ve experienced many of these.

now, a lot of people don’t think you can get addicted to this drug, but you definitely can. it’s awful and scary and i remember thinking “i’m never going to be able to stop, i can’t live without this.” i was taking 1,000mg of this shit every day. 20 pills down the hatch at lunch time during school, and 20 more after it wore off when i was home. you build up a tolerance quick, and you learn how to act normal when in public. hell, i felt like i NEEDED it to act “normal.”

i didn’t eat. dph gave me what i call “pill belly,” which means i’m always hungry but the pills made just the smell of food nauseating. some days, i would vomit if i tried to force myself to eat. i lost so much weight. i was dying, but i was okay with it. i had drugs to keep me numb.

i couldn’t get through the day without my dph. i didn’t drive at the time because i was only 15, so i would WALK from my house, to walgreens, and back just to get it. i would get a bottle of 200 pills that would last me about a week. i did this weekly, no matter the weather. some nights i would have to walk 2 hours in the sleet and snow just to get it. i didn’t care. i needed it. i couldn’t bear reality, i couldn’t live without it.

i still find myself relapsing from time to time despite how shitty the high is. i permanently fucked up my memory, my circulation, my breathing, and my ability to build muscle because of dph. i developed insomnia and for a while i thought i had developed schizophrenia or some mild form of dementia (?????) because even during the small moments i was sober i would still see, hear, and talk to things that weren’t there. not only has dph affected my physical health, it’s destroyed my mental health as well. i’m having troubles that i haven’t addressed and will probably keep private because i don’t see relevance.

these are just general details that i’m able to recall. i don’t remember much. diphenhydramine is a deliriant. i get so mad at myself sometimes because i try to remember certain events and i can’t because i was tripped out beyond belief. i lost nearly a year to drugs. it’s like 15 year old me never happened. that time frame is just gone. it’s gone and i can never get it back. i’ll never forgive myself for that.

so there you have it. if you take anything from this, REALIZE THAT DRUG ADDICTIONS ARE NOT BEAUTIFUL. ABUSING CHEMICALS IS NOT POETIC. IT DOES NOT MAKE YOU ANY BETTER. IT KILLS YOU. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT USE OTC MEDS TO GET HIGH. OR ANY DRUGS. DRUGS R LAME. ADDICTIONS ARE LAME. YOU ARE BETTER THAN THAT.

A Little Elisa Maza Appreciation

Since we’re nearing the end of Black History Month, I decided I would like to input my own thoughts about it. Now having seen a lot of other posts about this on Tumblr and other sites, I can’t really add anything much about people who were helpful in the Civil Rights Movement or in establishing equality for black people that hasn’t already been said, and I wouldn’t know how to talk about those types of things, anyway. But there is one thing I do know how to talk about, and that’s cartoons.

Keep reading

Bronze (Kyungsoo x Reader)

How’s it going everyone? The moment so many people have been anticipating has arrived: my newest Kyungsoo scenario is ready now! Ever since I posted ‘Bookstore Shenanigans’ it has become one ,if not my most, popular work of writing on this blog. I’m so, so very pleased with the amount of hype that’s been cropping up around the blog for this scenario, so I hope it lives up to your guys’ expectations! I’m just so nervous as to how it will go over with you all. Anyway, please enjoy!

P.S. I’d like to thank Do Kyungsoo for being a human being and for putting me through my Kyungsoo Sexual Awakening faze. 

P.S.S. Just look at bae…Look at him! My feels for him have jumped up so much since I wrote this!

Originally posted by kyvngsoo

 You’ve never really been much of an outdoors kind of girl. You liked to much rather spend your time doing what you called ‘meaningful activities’ like watching Netflix or snuggling with your boyfriend. You didn’t like to tell most people that your everyday life consisted of your job, school, eating, Netflix, reading, and sleeping. You especially hated to admit that you were jealous of the happy and lithe, athletic girls who spent their weekends hiking with friends or taking romantic kayak trips with their boyfriends.  

 You knew any moment you could ask Kyungsoo to take you out into the country or forest anytime, and he’d be willing because he loved that kind of stuff. You just didn’t understand his incredible fascination with starting fires, setting up tents, and sleeping with bugs that could crawl into your ears. It was evident he was always a bit disappointed when he’d ask you if you wanted to take a day trip to hike and you’d always make up a not so valid excuse. You felt terrible for constantly disappointing him, but you just couldn’t find anything to gain from sleeping in the woods.

 You scrolled through Netflix, searching for a new show to binge watch over the weekend. You heard the door open and close, the sound of a bag dropping unceremoniously on the floor with a tired groan accompanying it. The familiar rich voice of your boyfriend reached your ears, “I’m home, ____.”  He walked into the living room, scoffing as he saw you were up to your usual Friday night activity of being unproductive. He lifted your legs from the couch and slipped underneath them, he tutted you, “Sometimes I wonder if you ever do anything else than this.” He slung his arm at the television in annoyance, looking at you earnestly.  

 You pouted at him, twisting your cold fingers through his, “Hey, I deserve this. I work almost full time and attend university, so I don’t want to here it, Soo.”  

 He shook his head wryly, lifting your joined hands, and kissed the back of yours softly, “That’s true. But don’t you think you should try getting out more often? When’s the last time you hung out with Nana? She’s your best friend after all, don’t you miss her?”

 You averted your eyes from his huge gorgeous ones, as you mumbled bitterly, “She’s been busy with her new boyfriend. I’ve been calling her and talking, but I only ever see her at school sometimes.”

 "Well, since you don’t think you can get together with Nana, how about you and I do something this weekend?“  

 You looked up at Kyungsoo, pursing your lips, “I thought we could just stay in this weekend,” you sat up and let your hand trace the lines of his chest through his t-shirt that still smelled faintly of his cologne, “And do things." 

 He swallowed at your touches, but his eyes hardened, "Oh no. As much as I love having our little sex marathons, I’m not letting you stay in this house one more weekend.”

 Your jaw dropped, surprised your usual tactics weren’t working, “What are we supposed to do then, Kyungsoo?”

 He smirked at your distress, loving how you realized you had no way out of his plan, “We’re going to go camping, babe.”  

 You just gaped at him while he smirked that evil smirk you both loved and hated. He closed your mouth with his hand, “Don’t waste your energy, babe. You’ll be doing plenty of that this weekend.” He raised his eyebrows at your dropped jaw with a mischievous grin.  

 You blushed at him furiously, “Yeah, right! You’ll be sorry this weekend when you don’t get any!" 

 He stood up smiling, "Oh, I’m not too worried about that. You should be though." 

 You crossed your arms stubbornly, "Yeah? What’s that supposed to mean?”  

 He smoothed your hair gently, grinning amusedly, “I’m just not sure you’ll be able to resist." 

 You rolled your eyes at him, "Ha! Like hell, Kyungsoo.”  

 He rolled his own eyes laughing, “Alright, ____. We’ll see.”

 You found yourself in your two’s shared car, your head resting against the window. The country side rolled by and soon the car was swallowed into a miriad of twisting green trees. You sniffed disdainfully just to spite Kyungsoo, even though you had to admit, the forest was rather gorgeous. 

 Your boyfriend could tell you were trying hard not to look excited, so Kyungsoo just smiled to himself and murmured, “Almost there, babe." 

 You spoke toward the window, still pretending to be mad at him, "Oh, goody,” you deadpanned. 

 Twenty or so minutes later, Kyungsoo pulled down a gravel drive that led to a small parking lot where few other cars were parked. You grumbled at the sight, disliking how run down everything seemed to be.

  After parking, Kyungsoo popped the trunk and took out all of the gear: two hiking packs, a cooler of food and drinks, and a bag containing the two-man tent you’d bought for Kyungsoo a few Christmases ago. You took your pack and the tent, while Kyungsoo took his own pack and the cooler.  

 You could already notice a brightening in Kyungsoo’s demeanor as he led the way down the dirt trail that led to several of the most scenic campgrounds. There seemed to be more purpose in each of his steps, his mouth had a slight turn to it, a boyish curve of the lips that tempted you to kiss them, feel them. His eyes were gushing a thousand words, but he remained silent all the while you walked slightly behind him. You amused yourself on the long hike by studying the curves in his back, the flexing of each muscle under his tight, dark green shirt as he took his pack off and carried it by hand for a while.  

 You watched your feet for a while too, watching as they stepped over little grass sprouts or rocks. You were hardly paying attention anymore to where Kyungsoo was leading you, until you ran into his back clumsily.

He chuckled goodnaturedly, “Careful, ____. We’re here.”

 You looked up from the dirt path and gazed at the lush scenery around you. A small, but lovely clearing created the perfect space to pitch the tent, a fire pit already in place from the previous campers. A deep blue lake peeked shyly between the gaps of the oaks, beeches, and pines that guarded the clearing. Over the treetops, blue mountains saluted the sky with their jagged tops. It was absolutely breathtaking and you had no idea what to say.

 You didn’t have to though, because Kyungsoo was just quietly smiling at you, pleased with your reaction. While you were still gazing contently at the little flowers that sprouted around the clearing, Kyungsoo took your pack and tent bag from you. 

 You shot a glance at your boyfriend, who was already busy setting the tent up. Leaving him to his devices, you padded quietly toward the path that led to the lakeshore, delighting in the refreshing coolness the breeze that skated through the trees. As you broke the tree line, you gasped. No words could hardly do the scene before you justice. It wasn’t one of those dingy and murky lakes, instead it was like crystal azure sparkling silently over a few miles. You stood there for a few moments and then returned to see what progress Kyungsoo had made. 

 Kyungsoo had finished neatly erecting the tent, now diligently working on chopping firewood and starting a fire. He had rid himself of his shirt, his lean muscles rippling as he swung the hatchet down on a piece of wood expertly. His eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, but his eyes still read elation.
You bit your lip at the sight of his skin though. Recently, since the weather had gotten warmer, Kyungsoo returned to his habit of hiking shirtless on the weekends. His usually flawless pale skin had tanned to a golden bronze, darker than you’d first expected. Yes, you saw him shirtless all the time and you knew he was tanner than usual. But with his back, shoulders, and chest glistening slightly with sweat and the sun casting its warm rays onto his body…you couldn’t help yourself from staring.

 Oh, Kyungsoo definitely knew you were checking him out too. He smirked to himself, making sure to show off as much as he could to you. This was your payback for being so stubborn the other day. You watched as he straightened, swiping a hand across his forehead as he suddenly made eye contact with you. 

 Oh, boy.

 If his physical behavior said ‘make out with me and tangle your fingers in my soft dark hair’, his sultry dark eyes screamed 'I’m going to take you fast and hard against the closest tree’.  

 You were about to practically throw yourself at him and let him have his wicked way with you, but you remembered his cocky little smile from yesterday. You shook yourself, lifting your chin defiantly as you walked briskly past him to grab your back pack. Kyungsoo half wanted to laugh out loud at your resilience and half climb into a tree and never come down because he just failed at seducing you. 

 You climbed into the two-man tent, zipping it up, but leaving a crack large enough to peek out without being conspicuous. You smiled to yourself as you watched Kyungsoo pass a hand over his blushing face, a soft groan leaving his lips, “Idiot.”  

 As you unpacked, you grinned to yourself, thinking about how cute Kyungsoo had been. Yes, he looked like a completely innocent cupcake, which he really was. But he also could flip a switch and become so masculine and seductive in a nanosecond. Usually he acted sweeter and had to try pretty hard to be the latter, so it was a little hilarious to see him get embarrassed. 

 You moved to grab your and his sleeping bags, but could only find one. With your eyebrows drawn together in confusion you stepped out of the tent, “Kyungsoo? I could only find one sleeping bag. Do you know if we left the other one at the car?”

 If he was distraught from earlier, you couldn’t tell because he smiled up at you and said, “Why would we need two?" 

 You quirked an eyebrow, "Oh I don’t know, so that one of us doesn’t have to freeze?”

 He was completely nonchalant as he poked at the fire, “It’s a really big sleeping bag, I thought we could share it. Thought it would be more…intimate.”

 Damn him. Sneaky little shit. 

 "Oh, okay,“ was all you could reply with. You weren’t going to let him win. 

 He rummaged around in the cooler, pulling out two sandwiches, offering one to you, "Hungry?”

 You took it, grateful that he wasn’t trying to jump your bones every moment he could. You settled down beside him on the ground, the fire crackling softly. The two of you ate in companionable silence, occasionally commenting on the scenery. 

 You polished off your sandwich, leaning your head on his shoulder, “Thanks for bringing me out here, Soo.”  

 He kissed your head, smiling against you, “No problem, ____.”

 The two of you walked off from the campsite, exploring the area, and seeing all kinds of things. You spotted a fox, he picked you some wild flowers, and the two of you romped in the cool lake. The whole time, you hated to say that you were suspicious when he was going to make his move. Why couldn’t you just be normal and enjoy a camping trip with your boyfriend? 

 The sun set quickly and the two of you huddled around the campfire once again, talking very little as you both stared into the embers. You both were similar in the fact that you were content with just being with one another. You didn’t always have to talk, you could just be.

 You yawned loudly and he chuckled, his beautiful heart shaped lips curving into a grin, “Looks like someone’s ready to go to bed.”

 You nodded tiredly, allowing him to take your hand and lead you over to the sanctuary of the tent. Before you knew it, you were in one of his t shirts tucked against his chest as he settled into the sleeping bag.

 Big sleeping bag my ass, you thought grudgingly as you felt the rise and fall of Kyungsoo’s chest behind you, which was, mind you, bare. It was more distracting than you cared to admit, every little movement he made seemed to brush up against you in a way that was only a little teasing, but not enough. His fingers traced up and down your arm, causing goosebumps to tickle along your skin. He propped his head onto his elbow, humming in that velvety voice of his, a low and sensual song that invaded your senses. He was controlling all the senses that he new set you on the most delicious edge, your sense of touch and hearing. He knew you loved the sound of his voice and the feeling of his skin sliding against yours. 

 You swallowed hard, heat dripping into the pit of your stomach, as he let his hand sneak up your shirt, fingertips dragging along your sides. You let out a muffled moan, practically feeling the smirk on his face. 

 "Fuck it,“ you suddenly spit out viciously, twisting in the sleeping bag so that you straddled his waist. His eyebrows were raised in genuine surprise, not expecting you to be so forward and aggressive.

 You leaned down and connected your lips to his, your mouths gliding in a well practiced dance. Your hands slid over his chest, relishing the feeling of his smooth skin as he let out a soft groan. 

 You bit his lip gently, but hard enough to make his breath retreat with surprise, "That’s for being such a damn tease." 

 He grinned, his hands setting on the curve of your hips, "I’m not complaining if this is my punishment.”

 You rolled your eyes, brushing his hair from his eyes, “Of course you aren’t.”

 He laughed, his smile now wolfish as he rolled you over, his body hovering over yours, “So,” he lifted your shirt, immediately pressing kisses to your breasts and stomach. “How exactly is this my punishment? I’m getting what I want.”  

 You bit your lip as his satin soft lips and tongue traced over your naval, “Frankly, I’m not sure at all.”

 A warm, calloused hand came up and cupped your breast, “Maybe it’s best you’re not sure, babe,” he squeezed and you gasped, “Now let’s get back to my so called punishment. Or should I say, yours.”  

 You nodded frantically, his hand pressing to your aching core through your underwear. He looked more happy to be pleasing you than you could ever remember. Your voice choked out as his fingers nimbly slid your panties off, then deftly thrusting two digits into your soaking heat. His other hand was busy rubbing your clit in an almost studious manned, his focus only on your pleasure as you mewled led his name over and over.

 You propped yourself up on your elbows, eager to watch him doing his good work. You bit your lips at the sight of his tongue reaching down and licking up your essence. You loved the feeling of him pleasing you with his rough hands, and you wanted him, badly, but you wanted to surprise him as well. 

 You sat up suddenly, pushing him back down onto his back, loving the startled look on his face. Even in the dark you could see the glint of arousal and lust in his eyes, practically mind fucking you right then. You let your hands slide all over his chest, pinching his nipple hard enough to make him gasp. You smirked, leaning down so your lips brushed the shell of his ear, “It’s okay, baby. Moan as loud as you want, no one will hear." 

 He groaned softly, teasing you with a quaver in his voice, ”______!…“  

 You straddled one of his thighs, rubbing your dripping center up and down his leg, "Come on, Kyungsoo. Moan for me.” You rode his leg hard, knowing when you would whisper dirtily to him how aroused he would get. You hadn’t even touched his dick yet, but it was painfully erect, his hands shaking as they grasped your hips and pulled you into his lap. He sat up, biting up your arms, chest, and neck, leaving small bruises in his wake. His full lips soothed each bite as you lifted up, his hand guiding his throbbing cock to your heat.
You shivered as the head brushed against your folds, allowing a shaky moan to escape your lips.

 Kyungsoo took a hold of your chin roughly, locking his eyes with your own as he whispered huskily, “I want to see the look on your face when I put my dick in your pussy, _____. If you dare look away,” he smirked at your awed face, “I will pull out and leave you quivering in your own desire. So be a good girl and look at me.”  

 You nodded obediently, staring deeply into Kyungsoo’s dark orbs, and he into yours. You could see each other’s reflections in each glassy surface, projecting both of your greatest desires.  

 He slid you slowly onto his member, watching you carefully to see if you looked away. You were a disciplined individual, so you focused on the feeling of his penetration and the delicious look on his face as your walls tightened around him. Each of you moaned at the familiar feeling, loving how you were Kyungsoo’s first, and how he was yours. He was the only man you’d have desired to have in this way, filling you to the brim with his being. You’d been together with him for years and years, but the feeling of surprise never left you as he slid you down to the hilt, his well endowed member stretching you in the most desirable way.  

 "Kyungsoo!…,“ you gasped as he rolled his hips up towards you, one fluid motion that sent a thousand feelings racing throughout your body.

 You matched his rhythmic pace, running your trembling fingers through his dark hair, occasionally bucking a bit faster in order for him to see you wanted it faster and harder. Kyungsoo loved gentle love, you liked it a bit more rough and kinky, and he was always more than happy to oblige.  

 His fingers bruised your hips as he whispered darkly in your ear, "Does my baby girl love the way my dick fills her up? Does she want me to cum all over her?”  Kyungsoo’s pace had picked up dramatically, and you were struggling to keep up with him, so he roughly pushed you down onto your back and began to take you against the floor of the tent. 

 He hooked your knees over his shoulder, causing your moans to only be choked out, “Yes, Kyungsoo!…Yes…Yes!…”  

 At the sound of your voice he moaned loudly and you couldn’t stand it anymore because just his voice could make you come. Your release was violent with your heart skipping, your legs twitching, eyes fluttering, breathing choked as your world shattered around you in burst after burst of pleasure. Kyungsoo watched you writhe in pleasure beneath him, your name spilling from his lips as he came as well, his hot seed shooting in powerful spurts into you, your walls greedily milking him of all his release, “Holy fuck, _____!…" 

 The two of you road your releases out together, whispering your names, clutching onto arms, and kissing bruised skin. Oh, how you both loved the feeling of being completely one with each other. 

 Kyungsoo pulled out, watching as you winced at the feeling of him leaving you. He leaned down and kissed your forehead, hushing you gently as he pulled you into his chest. You pressed soft kisses to his body, wrapped up in his strong arms while he hummed contentedly. 

 "You win,” you mumbled into his chest, just loud enough for him to barely hear. 

 He grinned at you, “What was that?" 

You looked up at him pouting, "I said you win, Soo.”

He laughed that one lovely boyish laugh he did only for you, the laugh that took your breath from the first moment you heard it, “To be honest ____, I would say we both win in this situation." 

 Your pout spread into a small, shy smile, a hint of mischievousness underlying it, "For now, I guess." 

 He sighed, a tired smile on his lips, "You’re always ready for some competition, you know that?" 

 You nestled your head into the crook of his neck, whispering softly as you drifted off towards sleep, "Only if it’s with you, Kyungsoo.”

The Whole Pewdiepie Thing

Now I wasn’t going to make a post on this but I feel like I should say this:

Jack has stated in the comments of one of his recent videos that he’s not going to comment on what’s happening with Felix. And I don’t think that he should have to anyways. He clearly doesn’t want to be involved in this since he’s stated multiple times that he doesn’t like conflict. Even if people disagree, I think they should at least respect that. I’m seeing so much stuff about Felix in the jacksepticeye tag and that right there might be one of the reasons Jack has been less active on Tumblr.

Maybe it’s just me but I don’t think anybody would want to see people talking really really negatively about a friend. Or have those same people claim that they should intervene on what their friends say or do JUST CAUSE THEY’RE FRIENDS AS IF THEY SHOULD BE THEIR FRICKIN GUARDIANS?!?!?!

Just my two cents on the subject.

I’ll shut up now and get back to reblogging stuff…

2

GUYS. IT’S ONLY BEEN A MONTH SINCE I HIT A THOUSAND FOLLOWERS.

Anyway I’ve technically already said what I have to say in my Small-ish Updoot post but I’ll say it again. Thank you so much for supporting this blog. It really means a lot to me. Like, I love seeing all your fanarts and stuff and then theres also people rewriting lyrics for the AU too it’s just. AGHH YOU’RE ALL SO GREAT OKAY

HERE’S A TINY PEGGY GIF! I hope no one gets tired of tiny Peggy! 8D

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I didn’t know if I should post this since it kinda felt like a humblebrag ? But the story was cute as hell. I wonder why kids are so interested in seeing faces ? They always want pictures of people. 
Now there’s a picture of my dumb face in the hands of a 7 years old somewhere. I hope she gets a better role model quick !

Anyway, I finished the book I was working on and I’m now working on other super neat projects that I should be able to talk about very soon.