simk

RANDOM BIOS

la vem a que se acha a dona do site

ao me seguir você concorda com os termos de que vai ter que me aguentar na sua tl falando merda sim

k in kkkkkkkk stands for kill yourself

nem sei o que eu to fazendo aqui

a usuária se encontra ocupada fazendo merda

要開心

엿먹어

alo marilene a noite tainha vinho e mt (cd ou nome do seu ídolo rsrsr)

single&sad

okey dokey yo

fazer oq meu pau te ama

barbiezinha por fora bebe chorona por dentro essa so eu

bitch hold my beer

99% berro e aquele 1% grito

cries in ㅠㅠ language

arigato konichiwa agora voce ja pode ir se lascar

y’all haters corny with that illuminati mess

buy me kawaii things and call me princess

bITCH I LOVE CUDDLES

I got hot sauce in my bag

1 2 3 cala a boca de uma vez

daddy’s little princess

kkkkkkkkkkjjkkktotriste

bem vindo(a) a o diario da(o) garota(o) sem vida social

so falo merda

you’re so confident without being mean, what antidepressants are you on?

what fresh hell is this?

you can call me piranhona do amo

I’m too pretty to die



Então galerous, é isso! Eu fiz as bios bem misturadonas, com um pouco de pt inglês coreano, chinês e japonês (sai da frente que a louca por asiáticos tá passando). Usem as bios com carinho hehehe e não esquece de deixa o famoso likezinho aqui embaixo. Se tiverem alguma coisa que querem que eu faça é só pedir.


Credits: @cxrryoungjae no twitter

saiki kusuo/hp crossover where saiki is reincarnated as harry potter with all his memories intact, and the “power the Dark Lord knows not” is just saiki’s ungodly arsenal of psychic powers. 

points: 

  • the dursleys are the worst kind of bullshit saiki has ever seen, and saiki either a) puts an end to it within the first few days, or b) just straight up leaves, no one finds him until he’s twelve and it’s time for him to attend hogwarts 
  • “you have been accepted into the hogwarts school of w–” [saiki incinerates the letter in his hand and goes back to reading his book] 
  • saiki’s greatest ambition in life is to live a perfectly normal, unassuming, peaceful, boring life. an ambition so great it immediately lands him in slytherin. 
  • saiki finds himself saddled with every awful “chosen one” trope that has ever graced the earth. he thought being the protagonist of a gag manga was bad but this is worse
    • this is so much worse, he can’t even play along with the narrative anymore. he is going to turn this into a comedy if it kills him
    • saiki surreptitiously solving the problems of everyone around him. finding neville’s toad. making sure people’s potions don’t explode. dragging draco malfoy’s broom back down to earth when he tries to show off during the first broom riding class. saiki is not going to tolerate any bullshit and he most certainly is not going to tolerate anyone trying to go into the third floor corridor
    • and you know what, since quirrell and voldemort are apparently sharing a body (which – how, actually, it’s so disgusting he doesn’t want to know–) he might as well take care of the problem within the first week of school 
    • voldemort shows up again second year. WHAT THE FUCVK
  • all of his dorm mates are intolerable, and saiki very quickly figures out a system where he will pretend to go to sleep in his dorm, but then he just teleports to an unused hufflepuff dorm and enjoys himself greatly on his own. a triumph. a triumph slightly ruined by the house elves knowing he’s there, but a triumph nonetheless. 
    • “but it’s impossible to apparate within the hogwarts castle!!” saiki stares hermione dead in the eye and then teleports anyways 
  • saiki is very carefully mediocre in every single one of his classes in an attempt to kill any notoriety that comes along with the name “harry potter.” except potions class, because snape always gives him a far worse grade than he deserves and saiki is a mean and spiteful soul. saiki makes a point to be the best god damn potions student that snape has ever had
  • fred & george weasley catch saiki doing something ridiculous with his powers, and they’ve been bothering saiki ever since. saiki is full of regret 
  • fourth yr: saiki stays far far far away from the triwizard tournament. he is perfectly happy when cedric is elected, and claps enthusiastically. the goblet of fire turns blue. it spits out his name. saiki is so furious the goblet of fire cracks in half 
  • but the most important part of this au is 
  • saiki with a wand 
  • he doesn’t even need a wand he’s just pretending to use it 
  • someone: augh, this levitating charm is so difficult! how does anyone do it?!
    saiki
  • this au is 9x better if you imagine that saiki doesn’t even have magic powers – he just has psychic powers, and he’s very good at pretending he has magic. except transfiguration, everyone thinks he’s a bad student cause he has never done a transfiguration spell in his life – but hermione is convinced he’s some kind of secret genius at wandless magic because she caught him levitating a book to himself in the library once. saiki has deliberately failed every magic task appointed to him in front of her since. hermione is convinced saiki is spiting is spiting her specifically by not doing well in class. she’s right 
  • EVEN MORE HILARIOUS TO CONSIDER: saiki doesn’t even bother pretending he has magic, he just shows up to hogwarts and never says anything and never talks to anyone else, he turns in impeccable classwork and homework, but he never performs a single spell because he doesn’t see the point. it gets to the point where the teachers are genuinely worried he might be…. perhaps… a squib? is he a squib? 
    • saiki figures it would be really troublesome to let this go on any longer, but he is also extremely against saying anything out loud ever, and he is also extremely against showing any wordless or wandless magic because who knows what kind of attention he’ll get then 
    • cue incident in class where a student’s spell goes wrong, badly, and everything is in chaos, and saiki is so tired he decides, fuck it, he does not want to deal with this today, and he uses his psychokinesis to forcibly subdue everything that is going wrong. he’s in the corner of the classroom, so he thinks he’s safe & no one will notice – but nope. professor flitwick noticed. professor flitwick is staring at him with starry eyes. god damn it 
    • saiki briefly considers erasing flitwick’s memory of the event, but, well, if flitwick tells the other teachers about what he saw then no one will wonder if saiki is a squib anymore. probably. 
    • but you know what would be great? if everyone thought saiki was a squib and he got fucking chosen by the goblet of fire. everyone riots 
  • there are so many good things that could happen when you combine saiki’s deadpan self + sheer OP ability with the entire ridiculous hp universe and i love it

anonymous asked:

I recently started following you because of your fic "but you gotta.." when I was saw your villain!deku ideas and I just fell in love with it! I haven't seen anything about All Might yet but I like to think he's like Deku's almost/kind of father that is trying to parent him while simultaneously fulfilling his duty as a hero all the while constantly asking himself just how he basically adopted one of the most notorious super villains.

my theory is actually that izuku still hero worships all might and has a TERRIBLE celebrity crush, he fanboys hard on his social media account and everyone knows!! but izuku is too shy to actually try stalking tracking down the hero he admires most! mostly he just posts about how cool all might looked in his most recent battle, did you see that,all might is so incredible and izuku would probably die if he ever met him in real life. 

one day though. one day izuku spots all might fighting a villain – and he can’t help but follow all might around, watching with round eyes as all might fights. the villain is a slippery one, and manages to slip away – and so, all might lands next to izuku on the roof while he’s looking for the villain. ah, hello, says all might; did you happen to see someone pass this way, by any chance? izuku, too awestruck to say anything, points wordlessly after the villain. all might takes off. 

afterwards, izuku gushes about how he ACTUALLY SAW ALL MIGHT, he ACTUALLY HELPED ALL MIGHT, and he is just extremely happy about the entire thing but entirely too shy to actually try approaching all might again. 

anyways, he’s not stupid. there are heroes he can fight, and there are heroes he can’t. most heroes have pretty obvious counters, if you think them through; but there is very little izuku can do to counter simple, overwhelming strength. if all might knew he was a villain, and all might decided to arrest him, there’s nothing izuku can do. and as much as izuku admires all might so, as much as he wants – izuku isn’t ever going to risk putting his freedom on the line like that. 

but. 

if yagi toshinori meets an enthusiastic and cheerful civilian boy at his favorite coffee shop – if they’ve struck a strange acquaintance, if said boy talks to toshinori about his favorite heroes and asks after toshinori’s day – well. 

there’s nothing strange about two civilians being acquainted with each other. 

i’d also like you to consider: instead of all might taking in izuku, strangely enough, it’s actually a combination of detective tsukauchi and eraserhead. 

aizawa objects strongly to this, but somehow it’s happened anyways. 

viperofsand  asked:

The idea of the HP world thinking THE CHOSE ONE may be a squib is SO HILARIOUS thank you for this.

the thing is, no one can figure it out if it’s true or not!! 

FIRST OF ALL: saiki made it into hogwarts. he got sorted by the sorting hat. and you can’t get sorted unless you’re magic; it’s common sense. saiki has got to have magic. but – there is the story of a squib who managed to make their way into hogwarts, all the way to the great hall, before they were found out. who’s to say that a squib couldn’t fool them all entirely? 

SECOND: saiki has a wand. granted, a wand that no one has ever seen him use, but a wand nonetheless. students bring up the possibility that it was just stolen off someone else, or it’s just an elaborate fake, and it isn’t really his – but some of the pureblood kids did some snooping with all their old connections, and that wand was sold to saiki by ollivander. no one can say exactly what happened in the shop that day, but the facts are: ollivander’s wands choose the wizard, and if saiki isn’t a wizard, then how could he have gotten a wand? 

maybe ollivander took pity on him, someone suggests. maybe ollivander gave him a wand that wasn’t his. or maybe what ollivander gave him wasn’t a wand at all. if they can just steal saiki’s wand and test it out, maybe it will give them some answers. 

but no one can ever find saiki outside of class. no one can find where he keeps his belongings, either, and every time they come close, some incident mysteriously crops up to distract them away. 

Keep reading

The National Museum of American Wizardry is one of the older museums of the Smithsonian Institution. It opened on March 17, 1910 along with the new U.S. National Museum in the building that now houses the National Museum of Natural History. Unknown to Muggle visitors, the two museums share this gold-domed building. The entrance to the Museum of American Wizardry has moved several times to accommodate changing exhibits in the Museum of Natural History.

James Smithson’s supposed death did not put an end to his work. While Muggle bureaucracy delayed and debated enacting his bequest to the American people, Smithson saw to a more sensitive aspect of his planned institution. He founded the Smithsonian Institute of Magical Knowledge as a secret branch of the Muggle Smithsonian Institute. SIMK’s first mission was to protect Muggles from unwitting contact with magical relics and artifacts. As the Smithsonian’s collections grew, a team from SIMK combed through each donation, removing any objects that might prove dangerous or violate the Statute of Secrecy. SIMK’s staff cataloged these artifacts and stored them in a special vault under the Smithsonian Castle. By the twentieth century, SIMK had acquired such a large collection that the establishment of a museum became the Institute’s new goal.

Over a century has passed since the founding of the National Museum of American Wizardry, but SIMK continues to in its dedication to its original mission. SIMK curators often advise their Muggle counterparts, who believe them to be specialists of one kind or another. This close contact between the two Institutions has forced SIMK historians to learn the ins and outs of Muggle museum practices. In recent years, collaboration with Muggle curators has led to an anti-magic movement among the SIMK ranks. While magical means of preservation and learning an object’s history are much more efficient than non-magical methods, questions have been raised about the long-term integrity of artifacts. Normally, every object undergoes a barrage of spells upon its acquisition, but does the casting of these spells change the nature of the artifact? Some members of SIMK say the magical miasma surrounding the collections could cause untold damage. They claim the oldest objects are already showing signs of magical tampering. In response, at least one curatorial wizard has sought further education in Muggle museum studies. Officially, SIMK has not acknowledged the growing schism between factions of the Institute’s staff.

Althea Honeycutt

-Assistant Curator, National Museum of American Wizardry

2

A passenger ship named Dongfangzhixing (Eastern Star) carrying 458 people, including 406 Chinese passengers, 5 travel agency workers and 47 crew members, sank on Monday night in the Jianli section of the Yangtze River in China. According to officials 15 people have been rescued with hundreds still missing. The captain and the chief engineer both survived and claimed that the ship sank quickly after being caught in a cyclone. Rescuers fought bad weather on Tuesday as they searched for the missing, many of them elderly Chinese tourists, in one of China’s worst shipping disasters in decades.

http://www.theatlantic.com/photo/2015/06/hundreds-missing-after-ship-sinks-in-chinas-yangtze-river/394700/#img17