I would say it’s time to play Let’s Find The Motherfucker Who Caused This Mess, but I know who you are, I know what you did, and I’m standing outside your house. Are you going to come out like a sensible demonic force of evil, or am I going to have to take your mountain range off its hinges?
- Manwë, to Melkor, the Silmarillion, Of the Voyage of Eärendil and the War of Wrath
Galadriel had endeavoured to make Lórien a refuge and an island
of peace and beauty, a memorial of ancient days, but was now filled with
regret and misgiving, knowing that the golden dream was hastening to a grey
Concerning Sauron: “In all the deeds of Melkor the Morgoth upon Arda, in his vast works and in the deceits of his cunning, Sauron had a part, and was only less evil than his master in that for long he served another and not himself. But in after years he rose like a shadow of Morgoth and a ghost of his malice, and walked behind him on the same ruinous path down into the Void.”
-The Silmarillion by J. R. R. Tolkien (Ed. Christopher Tolkien)
Fuck, there goes my hot body. Time to change my name to The Abhorred Terrible Dread and go hide in my spiky goth fortress of doom forever. I’ll see you bitches when they invent Visine, and every second until then. Peace out!
- Sauron, still shaken by the destruction of Númenor, the Akallabêth
Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don’t know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I’ll kill my own kin. So sue me… No, don’t sue me. That is the opposite of the point that I’m trying to make.
“Here ends the SILMARILLION. If it has passed from the high and the beautiful to darkness and ruin, that was of old the fate of Arda Marred; and if any change shall come and the Marring be amended, Manwë and Varda may know; but they have not revealed it, and it is not declared in the dooms of Mandos.”
No, I’m not proud of you. You got the guy who successfully kept us all from murdering one another locked in a dungeon on Werewolf Demon Island, you almost started a civil war, and my favorite nephew is now calling me ‘Imperialist Bastard’ in all of his letters home.
- Maedhros, to Celegorm and Curufin, when asked his opinion of their Nargothrond exploits, the Silmarillion, Of Beren and Lúthien
Nonetheless Ulmo loves both Elves and Men, and never abandoned them, not even when they lay under the wrath of the Valar. At times he will come unseen to the shores of Middle-earth, or pass far inland up firths of the sea, and there make music upon his great horns, the Ulumúri, that are wrought of white shell; and those to whom that music comes hear it ever after in their hearts, and longing for the sea never leaves them again.