silly kris

((in reference to this))

Desperately needing the money in order to support his younger hatch mate and having no other options, Kankri works as a host/hostess, chatting to wealthy high bloods and serving them drinks, acting like he cares about their privileged lives, while also giving them the luxury of enjoying him NOT going off about their horribly triggering attitudes. Cronus and Kurloz have become his near permanent customers, using him as an opportunity to one up each other in their perspective businesses/have a petty wriggling rivalry of along the lines of “HE LIKES ME BETTER!!!1 *stomps foot*.” Shenanigans ensue.

Exo reaction:Noticing you (gf) have a great bust and butt since you wears loose clothes all the time
Anonymous said:EXO reaction to walking in on you getting dressed and they’re surprised that you have a really nice bust and butt because you wear loose fitting clothes all the time?

Very specific haha , lets do it

Sehun
You talk one last look at your dress and smooth it out. You smile , hoping you look nice and walk out of the bathroom. You see sehun playing on his phone , but looks at you and looks shocked.

You-“Do you like it?”
Sehun-“when did you grow those”. 
You see him point to your chest and chuckle.
You-“since 6 grade”.
You smile and approach him , and do a little spin.
Sehun-“when did you grow that butt!”
You-“I have always had it”
Sehun-“that is it , no more sweatpants! I want to see this everyday”.

Kai
You put on your tee shirt and your yoga pants , walking to the door. You see kai holding the gym bag and looking at his jogging shoes.
You walk up behind him and kiss his cheek.
You-“I’m ready”
He turns around and looks at you in shock.

Kai-“woah babe do you come here often”
You-“kai don’t be silly”
Kai-“you are so tempting why don’t you always wear this”.
You-“What do you mean?”
Kai-“Screw the gym, I’ll give you exercise”.
You-“How?”
Kai-“In the bed baby”.

Tao
You walk inside the apartment you share with Tao after a long business meeting. You are wearing a tight dress and your hair down. He looks at you and jumps in glee.
Tao-“I knew it, you were hiding that body”

You-“what are you talking about.”
Tao walks up to you and hugs you. You smile as he rubs his hand up and down your back.
Tao-“why hello my new friends”.
You-“who are you talking to?”
You gasp as he points to your chest.
Tao-“the girls,  those are all mines now”

DO
DO walks in your dorm and sees you only in a nightgown. He looks at you as you get up to hug him. You try to hug him when he looks confused and steps back.
You-“what is wrong?”
DO-“since when did you get that butt?”

You-“I have always had it.”
DO-“not that round and perky ”
You shrug and hug him , he spins you around but looks mad.
DO-“that is it , for now on I want to you in dresses”.
You-“No way”
DO-“WHY ARE YOU TORTURING ME WOMAN WITH THIS BODY!”

Chanyeol
You walk into the apartment, slipping off your shoes and coat. You reveal a small dress and much to your surprise you dee Chanyeol on the table eating.
Chanyeol-“honey is that you?”

You-“of course silly , I just got back from work”.
Chanyeol-“where are you sweatpants ?”
You-“I can’t wear that to work”.
Chanyeol-“um where do you keep then”.
You-“second drawer to the left, why?”
Chanyeol-“I am going to burn them so I can that body all that time”.
He runs to the room , laughing all the way.

Chen
You look at the shirt on more time and the shorts and agree. You walk in and see Chen talking to sehun. You smile and walk up to him as he checks you out.
Chen-“damn”

Sehun-“woah y/n , you look good”.
Chen-“umm sehun she belongs to me. Baby why didn’t I get you shorts early”.
You-“what are you talking about”.
Chen-“that butt is ridiculous , I will like to see it more”.
Sehun-“me too”.
Chen-“I am going to murder you , don’t look at the chest that is mine too”.

Baekhyun
You and baekhyun had a event today , and you had to look nice. You look at the red dress in delight and walk out to baekhyun ready in his suit. He looks at you and gasp. 
Baekhyun-“have you seen my girlfriend? ”

You-“you like it? ”
Baekhyun-“there should be a law on how sexy you look .”
You-“you are cheesy”
Baekhyun-“so when did you get YOYR boobs done?”
You-“Omg Never!”
Baekhyun-“really , I don’t believe you , come I need inspect them”.

Lay
You change into your bra and underwear with a small dress on top. You and lay are going to a club and you were nervous. He has only seen you in big clothes .
You see him waiting for you and looks shocked.
Lay-“woah”

Lay-“you look like a ray of sunshine”.
You-“aww that is sweet lay”
Lay-“I know this is strange but I have never you butt so out before”.
You blush as he blushes and brings you close to him. He smiles and kisses your cheek.
Lay-“you are beautiful with or without this dress, but I would like to see without”.
You-“lay!”

Suho
You wait for suho in living room , wearing your new outfit. You bought a nice dress to show of your curves. He hasn’t seen you in a dress ever so he will be surprised.
Suho walks inside and looks at you smiling. 
Suho-“why hello there”

You-“hey do you like it”
Suho-“I like those”
He points to your chest and winks.you hit him as he looks at you smirking.
Suho-“did you buy this?”
You-“yes I did ”
Suho-“I’ll buy more just two see you like this again”.

Kris
Kris and you are going out to celebrate his magazine shoot and you dediced to ditch your long loose clothes. You smile at your choice of clothes and walk outside the bathroom to see kris. He gets up and walks up to you.
Kris-“is that really my girlfriend”

You-“stop acting silly baby”
Kris-“spin for me”.
You smile and spin slowly as he checks you out. 
He smiles and bumps into you.
Kris-“you gave me the best congrats gift, that butt”
You-“you are so nasty”
Kris-“my thoughts are nasty right now”.

Luhan
Luhan walks inside the house , tired from the plabe trip. You walk up to him and jump on him. He smiles and spins you around but puts you down.
Luhan-“when did these grow”

He points to your boobs and you start to blush. He hugs you closer and kisses your cheek.
Luhan-“but seriously , when did these grow”
You-“um since 7th grade”.
Luhan-“well lets check that statement”.
You-“how?”
Luhan-“let your man do all the work baby”

Xiumin
Walking down the pier with xiumin he looks at your body again. 
Xiumin-“can’t you take off that dress”
You sigh and pull the dress down to your waist. He smiles and looks at your chest in shock.

Xiumin-“woah those are big”
You slap his chest and put your hand on his mouth. 
You-“stop saying that , it is embarrassing”.
Xiumin-“I can’t they are huge,  and you hid them”.
You smile as he pours and looks away.
Xiumin-“how dare your deprive excellent art like your body, no more I say”.

ASK BOX OPEN SEND IN REQUEST

Love you all

 

A few months after Suho’s divorce with Kris, mama Suho still checks his facebook diligently, probably because Junma’s still expecting him to come back…..but one day Suho was attacked by a kkaebsong surprise…..

.

.

*goes to Kris’ facebook**suddenly gasps*

WAIT

WHO IS THIS PERSON ON THE PIC? WHO THE HELL IS THIS….THIS…. WOMAN?????????

*scrolls down a bit more*

HOLY SHIT…THAT BASTARD HAD A KID WITH HER…

.

.

…A KID….

.

.

HE WAS EFFING CHEATING ON ME ALL ALONG

BASTARD

WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT

I’M SO DONE WITH HIM

I’M NOT GONNA LET MY LIFE REVOLVE AROUND YI-FUCKING-FAN EVER AGAIN. I’M SERIOUSLY OVER THIS PIECE OF SHIT WHO WAS NEVER GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME. 

I NEED A REAL MAN

AND THE WORLD BETTER BE PREPARED BECAUSE MAMA SUHO IS OUT TO GET SOME NEW MEAT NOW

And I guess that this the reason why Mama Suho suddenly became a queen diva

Can I just say something real quick.

You deserve someone who is responsible like Suho, someone as ambitious as Jongin, someone dedicated like Chen, someone optimistic like Chanyeol, someone with a beautiful soul like Luhan. Make sure they are silly like Kris, innocent like Yixing, mature like Kyungsoo and have the heart of Xiumin. Someone who makes you feel safe like Tao.Don’t forget as strong as Baekhyun, and an ass like Sehun’s. Don’t settle for anything that doesn’t make u happy. Don’t be content with anything less. Ever.