Hello, my friends (I hope we’re at this point in our relationship that I can call you all that) I thought about this idea after I binged the latest season of The Flash on Netflix and had to run to Target. It’s a silly idea but I hope you all like it!
You’re coaxed awake by the soft alarms of your phone indicating that the morning sun had hit the horizon. With the strong arm of Barry Allen holding you close to his slim but firm chest, you wish that you could just close your eyes and have sleep capture you once again. However having Barry as a housemate and a boyfriend, you find yourself having to keep the apartment always stocked with various food. This meant today on your day off you had to wake up early to buy more food that will be consumed within the next few days.
You interlace your fingers with Barry’s warm hand and attempt to wrangle yourself out of his grip. “No.” Barry sighed tightening his arm on you and tucking your head under his chin to keep you still.
“Barr, you need to let me go. I have to go to the store.” You attempt to reason with the tired man that has entrapped you with no avail. You were only given a grunt in response. “Barry if you don’t let me go this instant your spending the next week on the couch.” You threatened and was instantly released.
“You’re no fun,” Barry complains rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “What do you need at the store anyway?”
“Oh, you know another week’s worth of food that will be devoured by a certain Speedster that needs to consume 10,000 calories each day.”
“Man’s gotta eat.” He shrugged an easy smile playing on his face. “Can I come?”
“Barry I don’t think that’s a good idea…”
“Stop, it’ll be fun.” Barry insists rushing off and quickly returning fully dressed and ready to go in a blink of an eye. He wore a pair of faded blue jeans, a red plaid shirt accompanied by his favorite black jacket. “Now come on sleepy head go get ready.” He shoos you away and falls on the bed with a hoof putting his hand behind his head. Rolling your eyes, you retreat to the bathroom in hope to take a hot shower and look decent.
Once clothed and your hair look somewhat decent you grabbed the list of food you created last night and led Barry out the door and down the street towards the small grocery store on the corner. Barry quickly retrieves a cart, and you two make your way into the store. That was when you zoned out, mindlessly throwing the food in the cart and checking off the list, unaware that the hungry speedster was checking off his own list of junk food and candy.
After the final item is checked off, you look back to see the cart was now overflowing, all of the healthy food for a speedster now outweighed by various fruit snacks and potato chips.
Turning to give Barry so words you see a streak of yellow lightning whizzing down the aisle followed by a loud crash and Barry’s curses filling the store. Looking directly forward, Barry had run head first into an elder couples cart knocking all of its contents onto the cold tiled ground.
“Oh God sir I’m sorry I don’t know what happened.” The speedster panicked flipping the cart right side up and began to place the food back in its the shopping cart. Pulling the cart towards your boyfriend you meet his eyes with your worst glare as anger boils over. You force a smile towards the women and help Barry put the food back in the grocery cart.
Once everything is set back, Barry apologizes one more time and the elder couple leaves to check out. You stand in the middle of the isle glaring at the mound of food in your cart; Barry cautiously approaches you, knowning very well he was in the dog house. You turn on your heel meeting the speedsters eyes.
“Barry Allen, what have I said…” You drawled on crossing your arms in a display of anger.
“Never use my powers in a confined area.” He whispers avoiding your eyes.
“And this is why I tell you not too. Barry, you could have hurt that couple. Oh and don’t get me started on all this food you will put back.” You point to your overflowing cart.
“I understand I should have been more careful, but you can’t take that food away. I need it!” Barry whines like a child mimicking you stance with his long arms crossed over his torso. “You know I need to eat at least 10,000 calories.”
“And that 10,000 will not come from chips and candy. Now start putting all that crap back.” Barry smirked the same yellow lightning you had become accustomed too lit up in his eyes before Barry rushed off to throw the grocery back. Shaking your head, you begin to walk towards the checkout. “Barry Allen you are insufferable sometimes.” You whisper under your breath.
IDK what’s weirder, that A) This porno-spoof of Flash Gordon by the name of “Flesh Gordon” has some shockingly good stop-motion animation, B) That this puppet is from a wholly different unproduced stop-motion-monster movie painted gold or C) that this porno spoof was so well-received that it actually paved the way for production of the real Flash Gordon movie…
Doomworld, pre-Legends-and-even-pre-Flash Leonard:
control freak, in it for himself (and arguably mick), kills amaya and mick in cold blood, cold smirks and calculated moves
Infantino, it's-gotta-be-post-Oculus-are-you-shitting-me Leonard:
helps a not even friend with no gain for himself, talks said acquaintance out of killing a meta-animal-human hybrid, soft smiles and impulse agreeing to set up a man with his sister
Canon Snart: Cold blooded murder of innocent people, cruel, often treats Mick like crap. Has a lot more interest in Sara then she does in him. Grows up during the Legends and becomes a better person near the end ultimately ending in him dying a hero Fanon Snart: Is poor misunderstood sweetheart, has a strong moral code and would never hurt anyone innocent. Treats Mick like a beloved brother. Has a legendary love with Sara Lance who loves him utterly. Has always been a hero
Fans after Doomworld: Eh excuse me? How dare you use the canon portrayal of Snart instead of filming our fanfics?