silent bob speaks

  • Silent Bob: So there's me and Amy, and we're all inseparable, right? Just big time in love. And then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend. Which, as we all know, is a really dumb move. But you know how it is: you don't wanna know, but you just have to, right? Stupid guy bullshit. So, anyway, she starts telling me about him... how they fell in love, and how they went out for a couple of years, and how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah... and I'm okay. But then she drops the bomb on me, and the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times, while they were going out, he brought some people to bed with them. Ménage à trois, I believe it's called. Now this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to this sort of thing. I mean, I was raised Catholic, for God's sake.
  • Jay: Saint Shithead.
  • Silent Bob: *elbows Jay*
  • Jay: *come at me, motion*
  • Silent Bob: Do Something.
  • Silent Bob: So I'm totally weirded out by this, right? And then I just start blasting her. Like... I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling, so I figure the best way is by calling her a slut, right? And tell her she was used. I'm... I'm out for blood. I really wanna hurt this girl. I'm like, "What the fuck is your problem?", right? And she's just all calmly trying to tell me, like, it was that time and it was that place and she doesn't think she should apologize because she doesn't feel that she's done anything wrong. I'm like, "Oh, really?" That's when I look her straight in the eye, I tell her it's over. I walk.
  • Jay: Fuckin' A!
  • Silent Bob: No, idiot. It was a mistake. I didn't hate her. I wasn't disgusted with her. I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small, like... like I'd lacked experience, like I'd never be on her level, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm saying? But, what I did not get, she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy anymore. She was... she was looking for me, for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figure this all out, it was too late, man. She moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But I pushed her away.
  • Silent Bob: ...
  • Silent Bob: So, I've spent every day since then chasing Amy... so to speak.
I grew up fat I know about rejection. I would never go out of my way… I endeavor to not let people feel rejected ever. It’s fucking the bane of my existence, it’s why if I start signing I’m signing for fucking hours. It’s why strangers come into my house and conduct interviews, it’s why the website fucking exists. I’m that guy, I’m a guy who understands what it’s like to be rejected, so I never want anyone to feel rejected, you know, if I could I would cast each role with five different actors just so none of them felt bad for being left out. So never in a million years I don’t care who you are, do you walk through the door, and I’m gonna like rob you of your dignity or anything like that. I’m pulling for you even if you suck, I won’t let you think you suck.
—  Kevin Smith