silence in the internet

Things that are going down in Holland

Since Tumblr is being awfully quiet about this drama going on between Nethelands and Turkey, allow me to shine some light on this rediculous happening.

As some of you may know: dutch elections are coming up, that are currently on the same level of chaos as the american last year.

A few days ago, the turkish minister of foreign business (I’m just literal translating don’t know the english word) wanted to speech in Rotterdam about a referendum in Turkey that will give Erdogan more power, a.k.a. become a dictator.
That visit was supossed to be today but parlement (all parties, left and right) decided to say no to this visit because we are in the middle of campaigning for our own shitshow and don’t want another country meddling with the people that have to vote. Also we don’t support this referendum.

Erdogan got pissed, pulled out some sanctions, and called us nazi’s and facists.

He’s done this to Germany as well for not supporting his plan and in my eyes you’re just being a huge manchild.

Tumblr likes punching nazi’s, Tumblr likes freedom of speech, sexuality and gender. (Things Holland likes too, remember gay marriage in 2001, first of the world, ;) )

I’m sort of freaked out about the situation and the silence around it on the internet. Trump is a big deal, but I can tell you that Erdogan is on the same page.

I justed wanted to inform you on this, do with it whatever you want. I don’t really care anymore. *buddies, pals, support the turkish protestor as well please. There are some who are pro-Erdogan but I’ve heard of people from Turkey that agree that this whole thing is getting out of hand. Support them, compliment and praise because that’s how we stay connected and pull ourselves through this!

How has this stayed contained within the PTX fandom though? Like, if any other fandom found out their faves actually legit dated/hooked up in high school, it would have made its way all around tumblr and back by now…

Especially with the way tumblr loooooves to fetishize gay couples…
a straight letter from a straight

Dear LGBTQ+,

I was never one to remember anything, especially when it came down to spelling.

I could not and still cannot remember how to spell the word restaurant properly.

Is an a then a u or the a then the r?

Uhm… r-e-s…taurant.

But your name I can clearly remember and say without any doubts.

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, the Questioning, and beyond!

Dear LGBTQ+,

I have always been lumped into your community somehow,

Every single time.

For it appears that I do not quite show my sexual preference for straight males,

And I get slapped right on the cheek with a sexuality brand that isn’t my own.

I am straight as their accusing finger, directly pointed at my face.


Dear LGBTQ+,

I will not let that branding shame me,

For you must dearly suffer ten folds more

Than this straight female.

Dear LGBTQ+,

There have been far too many nameless victims,

Called by the wrong pronouns,

Misunderstood as a freak,

Shunned by society for writing she/her pronouns instead of he/him pronouns,

Pushed aside when there are scars on your sleeves,

Driven to that bridge,

Driven to jump off that bridge.

All because you’re different?

Dear LGBTQ+,

I cannot let that happen to any of you,

For you are all dear to me.

I cannot let my dear friends and sisters and brothers

Get shamed by those who finds pleasure in undermining

Those who were born and destined to be part of your sacred community.

Dear LGBTQ+,

You can love whoever you want,

I just hope you don’t find a backstabber.

I just hope you find your true love,

get that marriage license,

and never prove that your love is authentic.

Your love was already authentic to begin with.

Dear LGBTQ+,

Be yourselves, no matter what people say.

Plant that flag firmly into the ground

and show the world your colorful rainbows.

I will show mine just for you, too.

Despite those bright purples and reds definitely not being my style.

But you are all dear to me.

So let me fight by your side,

For all of us to see the day,

Where you may hold hands with another down the aisle,

And press your lips firmly against your partner’s,


Core Four+Favourite Movies

Archie: High School Musical. He would never say it out loud but he knows every single lyric of every single song from all three movies, along with all the routines. A̶n̶d̶ ̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶t̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶c̶r̶i̶e̶d̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶G̶a̶b̶r̶i̶e̶l̶a̶ ̶l̶e̶f̶t̶ ̶T̶r̶o̶y̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶e̶c̶o̶n̶d̶ ̶m̶o̶v̶i̶e̶. Only Jughead knows of his obsession and that’s because he walked in on him singing along with the movies more than once.

Betty Cooper: The Fault In Our Stars. Betty is a total sucker for romance movies, especially if it ends in sorrow. She loves to hate the story writers. She also loves good book-to-movie adaptations, which are pretty rare to find, which only makes her love them more. Veronica didn’t like it that much when she saw it with her but Betty had seen her crying three separate times during the movie.

Veronica Lodge: Silence of The Lambs. Veronica loves twisted horror movies. She saw the Silence of The Lambs secretly on the internet when she was 11 and though she was horrified at the time, she grew to love it as she got older. She watched it again with Betty, who complained that it was too gruesome but still loved every second of it.

Jughead Jones: Inception. Jughead loves Inception almost as much as he loves food. And that’s saying something. He’s seen it about a 100 times and he still isn’t tired of it. In his opinion, it is Christopher Nolan’s best movie and it is absolutely amazing and he will fight everyone who says otherwise. Archie almost got punched in the face for saying the ending was stupid.

✨thank you so much for 500+ followers✨

☆god tier (irl friends and internet pals/mutuals I talk to)
@silence-and-fictitious-love ; @mientxs ; @cloudyeli ; @adammilliganstillinthepit ; @foxy-camie ; @grand-rizer1997 ; @thumperthedutch ; @baekohya ; @dunsparsee ; @twoblackeyes ; @toccyx ; @a-fairies-tale ; @tanner-m-griffin ; @drusilla21

And now the faves: ☆# @6woofs ; @800-dick-pics ☆a-d @adrelix ; @amillionmadmusings ; @angelbabymish ; @annaobyrne ; @avockado ; @bee-aesthetics ; @beestiels ; @bitterlesbiangrandma ; @butchspace ; @canadiancosette ; @chrysafeniosgoddess ; @coltre @credencesbarebone ; @crypticdatesuggestions ; @cwote ; @diminuel ; @dinabayart ☆e-m @enjoloras ; @fakeffrank ; @fatwlw ; @garrisonbabe ; @ghostgallery ; @giffing-su ; @hellfires ; @hermioner ; @hollycbrown ; @holyhael ; @hurleyquinn ; @just-french-me-up ; @kamicom ; @lovelyspn ; @marsincharge ; @mcnuggyy ☆o-s @opinkomega ; @ozonecologne ; @petitetimidgay ; @philip-hamiltson ; @polyglotplatypus ; @pooraurora ; @r0rschach ; @real-faker ; @rosequart ; @rowanellis ; @rubybzzz ; @rvpphire ; @scnjunipero ; @screamcries ; @setheverman ; @softgrantaire ; @stevenquartz ; @su-aesthetic ; @sunshinesatan ; @sweetbabycheesecake ☆t-y @tardisastheimpalaat221bbakerst ; @thatsthat24 ; @thedoormann ; @thugilly ; @vrishchika ; @waxversic ; @wendlaschuylertaire ; @yourshipsaregross ✨thanks for being awesome✨ (sorry this is so long,, gosh)
Okay Loyal Theorists, time to get deep...

I’ve had anxiety and depression for as long as I can remember, and suicidal thoughts since about sixth grade. The months leading up to New Years 2016 were really bad for me. I was overworked and not paid, my family was going through a bad time financially, my grandmother was in pain and on her deathbed for months, bullied, physically beaten, and I hated myself because I am queer and religious. 

I found Game Theory around 2012, The Problem’s with Princess Peach, yeah, that far back. Through GT, I found so many other fantastic YouTubers, but GT will always be my first and favorite. 

December, after Christmas, before New Years, my grandmother passed away, my mother had to grieve, so I felt like I had to be the adult. I barely got to go to her funeral because I couldn’t have any sick days to take off from school to grieve, because I took all of my sick days off prior, because I was in competition One Act play. My dad became even more emotionally distant, I was bullied for months, but it got worse around that time, I had to get an extra job, along with my extra curricular acting, to help pay bills. And the self hatred kept growing and growing.

New Years Eve, 2015 going into 2016, I was invited to a party by some “friends” and I accepted, because I don’t like alcohol around my dad. At that party, where I basically knew no one, everyone was drunk, but me, and no one cared to know me at that point. I already hated myself, thought no one cared about me, from people from school, theatre troupe, director’s, my one friend, and even my parents didn’t care if I was alive or not. I had tried suicide many times before, but my body fought through it all those times before. But I had reached my breaking point, I tried to call my mom to try to calm down, but she didn’t answer. I ran into some stranger’s bathroom, locked the door, went through their cabinets to find something to end my life. I had pills in one hand, and a razor in the other. I thought no one would ever care.

And then my phone beeped, I opened it up thinking maybe my mom couldn’t call, so she texted. But it wasn’t her, it was a tweet/video of Matthew Patrick on his trip to Sydney with his wife, Stephanie, thanking all his fans, all the loyal theorists, because “without us, he wouldn’t be here right now.” He talked about how his life changed, for the better because of all of us. And that made me think, I looked down at what I had in my hands and after the video, I dropped them, I thought “If I can make someone I look up to happy, then this is not worth it, and this is not the answer for me getting better.” I started bawling my eyes out.

Because of Matthew and Stephanie Patrick, because of GTLive, because of Game Theory/Film Theory, I am alive, I got help, I’m taking meds, yes it was my decision, but they pushed me in the right direction. Now, I’m in a great place, I have a better relationship with my parents, I’m getting my GED and College degree early/earlier than usual. I’m out, I’m happy, I’m proud.

So, to all the “haters”, as Matt puts it, I don’t care if you disagree with theories, because that’s what they are, theories. I don’t care what you think, but just know, this man you openly hate on, because “oh, he made a theory I disagreed on! I hate him now!” saved my life. I would not be breathing and well without of him.

I would have overdosed, or hurt myself, or jumped off the balcony of my hotel room from that trip my theatre troupe went on, I would’ve stabbed or shot myself. But now I have friends, on twitter, on the chat, on tumblr, in real life, and on the screen. I owe so much to this man and his community. So, to whoever reads this, thank you. And if you ever need to talk, I am here for you, I care. The Theorists are some of the smartest, funniest, creative, and loving group of people on the internet, and I won’t be silenced with hate and death threats from anonymous tumblr users.

If you made it this far, or read any of this, clap and a half to you!  -Maria

I want you. I want your last name. Your Sunday mornings and daily commutes. I want your phone calls and your quirks. Your sick days and your laugh. Your arms around my waist. Your eye contact. Your smile. I want to find your lost keys. Do your laundry. I want the other side of the bed to be yours. I want your fingers intertwined with mine. I want your silences. Your internet history and electricity bills. I want your twisted past and your convoluted future. I want you. I just want you.

Alright, big heads up guys!

I’m going to be very quiet/nonexistent for the next few days because I’m technically don’t have internet.

I’m using my phone as a hot stop for internet, but that’s beside the point.

Mild update to yesterday’s post about my flight, Southwest immediately booked me on the next flight to my final destination (my grandparents house) without any additional charges because they are awesome.

That being said, I’m also going to be busy preparing for a teaching opportunity this Friday for a special needs class, sharing tips and tricks on how to draw. I will respond to IM messages, but they will be very sparse in an attempt to save my data.

This internet silence will mostly apply to by sideblogs, @compassionatedestiny and @steel-and-gold-seraphims. They will be completely silent during this week.

Love you guys and take care this week! (^3^)

links to fanfics i've written (on tumblr)


a week in mistward

i’ll let you play house


nightmares and healing

dive in

paper cut


wild of the halls

midnight closures



ever wonder


don’t fucking touch me

wake up

black coffee with white sugar

piss off

(a moment of silence for the lost link.) internet soup yet again took a victim to its void.


blood bride


both hand man


fancy damn

discreet desolation

star of steel (unfinished)

I used to think that the crazies were only on tumblr but at the end of the day they log off their computers and go out into the real world. I used to really downplay the effects of the term ‘terf’ for example, but it’s actually being used out in the real world to silence and direct violence towards real women (not that the internet and the women using it aren’t real lol - the fact that the silencing occurs here on tumblr doesn’t make it less real or harmful). I just think we’d be letting ourselves down if we were to continue to underestimate/downplay “tumblr discourse”. 

Dear internet (both actual friends and anonymous silence), the election in the country I live in did not go well today. It was close, though. I have to admit I cried a bit about the results, and it’s not even my nation to cry about. It’s very sad though. And, wouldn’t you know, it started raining this evening.


Request: Hey, I love your writing so much 💗 Could you maybe write something about Y/n looking through fan accounts & fan fictions of Shawn & Shawn gets home & gets really uncomfortable 💗 it would mean a lot :))

Your name: submit What is this?

It wasn’t often that you stalked your boyfriend’s tag on tumblr.  It was a quick and easy search: Shawn Mendes.  Thousands upon thousands of search results would come up, and with nothing better to do, you decided to see what his fans were up to.

On your own tumblr, you followed about two or three blogs about Shawn, you know, just to keep up with him when he wasn’t answering his phone.  The ones you followed only posted pictures of him though, nothing else.  So when you came upon a few pieces of writing, you became interested.

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