AN ACT OF SELF-FORGIVENESS
To the tune of Untitled 3 by Sigur Rós
And I have always meant, you.
Nothing would be the same if you did not exist.”—Sierra DeMulder
I. In meditation sessions,
you are told to be aware of your whole body,
of your hands,
each small thread of nerves as it is pulled and relaxed,
the tickle of oxygen as it vibrates in your bloodstream,
the rhythm of your breath,
the waltz of tears and fluttering eyelashes.
Remember, this body is more than just a body,
or the vessel for a song,
or the ocean that is the floating of your sadness.
It is a heartbeat instrument,
this rush and gentle diminuendo,
the orchestras that live in your voice-box.
You are more than manuscript paper and rosin,
more than the creak of wood and spinning compass,
you are not the siren that bends the spirits of sailors
but the wind that guides love home,
the same wind that has reddened your face
and turned the insides of your wrists raw.
On the days you are struggling to keep
survival in your lungs, you imagine bodies of water,
the sturdy redwoods of California,
something that is so big that your hurt can easily hide or be swallowed into.
Hope sometimes does not feel like a trustworthy life-raft,
but instead distant and full of holes.
There are beautiful things that grow even in the strongest storms.
The fear that falls in forests does not make a sound, but provides the potential for rebuilding,
the chance to grow roots,
to draft the treehouse you dreamed of when you were a child,
to see the sanctuary of peace,
the lightning bugs rising freely in a pink and sensitive sky,
the mending of the scorched tree-rings in you chest
from all of the times you have set yourself on fire, from all of the times you convinced yourself that you are not worthy of living. How off this world’s gravity would be if you were not here to share this space, the heaviness and joy of this universe, to not have someone to spend moments with staring up at all of the stars and let our imaginations adventure like pirates or astronauts, how the calm of our nostalgia lets us imagine a better place instead of leaving this world completely.
II. In meditation sessions,
you are told to be aware of your whole body; your spirit,
the galaxies in your irises,
how you are needed here despite all of the distorted notes and sinking.
You have been creating symphonies just by simply existing.
THERE WAS MORE TO SAY An instrumental fanmix for the amazing The Song of Achilles. All the songs are annotated with the part of the book it would fit, as well as a little quote. Hopefully it will seem like a proper soundtrack.
1. Epilogue (the games, the suitors, killing Clysonymus) Escape - Antonio Pinto 2. Achilles My imaginary friend - Lorne Balfe 3. Friends Faraway swimmingpool - Múm 4. Thetis Enough for one life - Lorne Balfe 5. To the mountains Requiem - Antonio Pinto 6. I don’t know if I’m worthy but I wish to stay - Mount Pelion Sugar Storm - Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross 7. Swear it Mílanó - Sigur Rós 8. Scyros Swings - Dustin O'Halloran 9. Off to Troy? The Gentle hum of anxiety - Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross 10. Aristos Achaion The Last of Us Main Theme - Gustavo Santaolalla 11. War I am become death - Ben Salisbury & Geoff Barrow 12. Briseis Pacific - Sleeping at last 13. Ten years of War Afraid of time - Hans Zimmer 14. Over your Pride A reflection - Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross 15. I will not fight River Fight - Antonio Pinto 16. Patroclus fights instead Temptations - Austin Wintory 17. Achilles grieves Reclamation - Austin Wintory 18. Hectors death means another death Benedictus - Anne Dudley 19. I am buried here Watching - Ben Salisbury & Geoff Barrow 20. Speak then Untitled 3 - Sigur Rós 21. Hands meet Some Other Place - Arcade Fire [LISTEN]
Can i just say that all the music in Skins is so so amazing and deserves more recognition. Like everything suits the moment very well - Young by Dog is Dead - Untitled 3 by Sigur Rós - Shifts by Over the Wall - It’s All Over by The Broken Family Band - Time To Pretend by MGMT - Glockinspiel Song by Dog is Dead - Skins Theme Tune by Fat Segal (of course i have to include my favorite theme song of all time)
Brian Eno is more than just a ground-breaking performer, songwriter, and award-winning music producer. He is also the godfather of ambient music, and spent decades crafting ambient sounds designed to help achieves specific psychological goals, like soothing women in labor. This song, from his album Music for Airports, is designed to “defuse the tense, anxious atmosphere of an airport terminal” — so it should work just as well defusing the tense, anxious atmosphere of trying to write a term paper on a book you “forgot” to read.
Explosions in the Sky — or, as you may better know them, the Friday Light Nights Theme Song Guys — create instrumental post-rock that is nearly vocal-free and totally engaging without being too intense. Listen, and envision Coach and Tami supporting you emotionally and loving you unconditionally while you merge Excel sheets.
The songs of ethereal Icelandic musicians Sigur Ros do technically have lyrics, but since they’re almost all in Icelandic, the brain power you use processing them should be negligible (unless you’re, you know, studying for your Icelandic language mid-term).
This instrumental, piano-based version of the theme from The Virgin Suicides provides a totally relaxed soundtrack to the movie of your life right now (it’s called Goddammit, Why Did I Sing Up for This Linguistics Course 2).
Disregard the weirdly threatening name — DJ/ composer Nightmares on Wax crafts chill soul and R & B-influenced electronica that pairs perfectly with realizing that it’s past midnight and you somehow haven’t even started studying yet.
Ahhhh, wake up wake up wake up! You chilled out too hard and accidentally fell asleep on your keyboard. Get pumped to make it through the next leg of your project and also clean drool off of your trackpad with this super-high-octane single-song album, which was specially created to be listened to while jogging.
Listening to this instrumental jazz classic off of Davis’s legendary album Kind of Blue won’t just help you focus; it will also give you something to talk to your uncle about at Thanksgiving this year (all uncles love Miles Davis, it’s a scientific fact; maybe you could do a lab project on it?).
This song’s high energy instrumental rock + lack of vocals = focus. You’re in the last stretch of your work marathon, and this song is throwing you cups of water and bananas and holding a big, glittery sign with your name on it! You can do it! Conjugate those verbs/ fine-tune that PowerPoint presentation/ glue those googly eyes to that poster board!
OK, you’ve made it this far, and you’re now in the absolute last moments of writing your paper. You’ve earned this pumped-up dance track, which technically has lyrics (but I’ll be damned if I can tell you what any of them are).
An emotional and sad imagine about Y/N and Harry being in a relationship, and then breaking up before university starts, this is so emotional, I personally love what I wrote, please read this while listening to Song For Zula or Sigur 3 .