shows up fifteen minutes late with starbucks

 Me: It’s 2017, no one wants to hear Gravity Falls meta

Also me: Stan never believed Gideon was an actual psychic—even though he knew supernatural things were possible, and even though everyone in Gravity Falls was against him, Stan always insisted he absolutely knew Gideon was a fraud.  Why was he so certain?

Gideon always called him “Stanford.” 

Anyone with real mind-reading powers would’ve known that was actually his brother’s name, and he was living under a false identity

The Silmarillion (or ‘If You Try Hard And Believe In Yourself, Your Family Drama Can Destroy A Continent’)

Prologue: Choir Auditions Today (Improvisational Jazz Not Welcome)

Introduction: Dear World, Meet Your New Bosses

1. Melkor Says Light Is For Squares

2.  Aulë Gets To Sleep On The Couch

3. The Elves Take A Road Trip

4. Getting Distracted By A Hot Girl Only Leads To Good Things

5. Paradise Is A Sort-Of Island In The Middle Of Nowhere

6. This Pardon Is Absolutely The Right Decision

7. The Best Way To Deal With Stress Is Infighting

8. Melkor Says Light Is For Squares (Again)

9. Fëanor Makes A Rash Decision

10. Teamwork And Magic Can Fix Anything 

11. The Valar Say Light Is Awesome

12. Men Shall (Eventually) Inherit The Earth

13. Cliffhangers Suck

14. Everybody Gets A Kingdom

15. Banning A Language Will Totally Solve Your Problems

16. Orphan Does His Best To Fit In After Horrible Childhood

17.  Men Show Up Fifteen Minutes Late With Starbucks

18. There Is Absolutely No Way It Can Get Worse

19. The Happiest People In This Book Have Fun Adventures

20. It Got Worse

21. You Won’t Believe How Awful This Guy’s Life Is

22. Aggressive Negotiations Make Everyone Hate You

23. When Ulmo Says Leave, You Leave

24. The Valar Get Dangerous

Interlude: Colonialism Is Caused By Devil Worship

Epilogue: By Now You Should Have Learned Not To Trust Jewelry

Ladies and gentlemen, I’m just gonna state the obvious: we have a doppelganger in our midst. As a civilization that respects creative integrity and intellectual property, I am disgusted at how much you have copied me. Do you not have any value or respect for originality? You’re a laughingstock, it’s cheesy, it’s disgusting. I personally find it absolutely artistically atrocious. I am embarrassed to be sitting here in your presence having to even dignify you with an answer of my opinion.
—  Katherine Pierce (to Elena Gilbert)

/pretends it’s still Halloween/

Let’s be real. My favorite part of the whole drunk Chihoko business is Emil basically showing up fifteen minutes late with Starbucks all like “Hey, Yuri, your fiance is hanging out naked on the top of the castle yelling about something. He’s starting to draw a crowd. Maybe someone should go deal with that.”
—  Me once again annoying my coworkers

shows up fifteen minutes late with starbucks all RIGHT

my half of the art trade with @radicalestes, canadian wunderkind, artist and mythologist and generally sick bro all the around as well as creator of the WONDERFUL Qarakorshaq!!! If you haven’t already checked it out, your life is sincerely lacking!!

ngl the first week was deciding which animal to do b/c all your beastie designs are primo A+!! ended up going with the simurgh and then realizing halfway through after I had committed to the Russian Aesthetic ™ that the simurgh was actually Persian in origin so woops ¯\_(ツ)_/¯