shoulder-waist ratio of a Doritos

anonymous asked:

So why is Chris Evans nicknamed Dorrito? Sorry I just don't know lol

Don’t worry, anon, I’m going to help you as best as I can.

Once upon a time - more than three years ago - the great Chris Evans was found a new nickname. After ‘Cevans’, we were all graced with the comparison of his body to a Dorito. #heart of gold and shoulder waist ratio of a dorito. It reached a peak after Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Why? Because he is the human Dorito. Look at his shoulder to waist ratio. It’s triangular.

I know right? A real Dorito. That is why every time I reblog Chris, it’s tagged as “My beloved Dorito”.

There’s a particular post on Tumblr that became so popular that the idea gained artists who began to add the Dorito!Steve Rogers or Dorito!Chris Evans to their fan works just for fun. It’s still especially featured in fanfictions.

You know what, though? The nickname became so popular that Robert Downey Jr. called Chris a “Dorito” twice during SDCC 2014. Who knows for how long it’s actually been going on? They were filming Avengers: Age of Ultron at that moment, so I’m sure the cast and crew called him Dorito a lot of time on set!

In April 2015, the Doritos brand - in promotion of Avengers: Age of Ultron - had a Steve Rogers/Captain America “Cool Ranch” bag.

And do you know how Chris reacted? Because there’s something you wanna know about him. He’s a simple guy, he loves Doritos chips. He loves them. He thought it was a life goals!

That same year, when he was promoting the movie with his fellow co-stars, he had the chance to taste his Doritos with his friend Chris Hemsworth and the video made the world go crazy.

That is how the legend of Dorito!Chris Evans was born, my friend.

Credit to the rightful owners of the pictures and the gifs.

I HAVE WRITTEN A TADASHIxREADER FIC

This is my first TadashixReader fic, so….

“Hey, Ms. Cass!” you greeted as you entered the Lucky Cat Café. School had just ended for the day, and so your part-time worker shift began. Since you were attending SFIT’s Med School, the café was a pretty convenient place to get a job. Not too far, but far enough that it took about ten minutes to walk. The relatively relaxed environment was a plus, too.

Chuckling, the owner of the café replied, “I’ve already told you many times that you can call me Aunt Cass. I’m more used to hearing that than ‘Ms. Cass’.” The brunette lady turned back around to take orders as you went back into the kitchen area where the majority of the sweets and pastries were made. Pushing your (h/c) hair away from your face, you dumped your unreasonably heavy backpack onto the ground in the corner near the aprons. As much as you loved studying medicine, the amount of material that needed to be studied was unbelievable. But then again, you were attending an elite college.

Your (e/c) eyes scanned the room for the recipe binder that normally sat on the counter. It wasn’t there. You spent the next ten minutes searching for it, but it was nowhere to be found. As usual, the biggest seller was French macaroons, but that was also the one recipe that was the hardest to memorize. Since it was originally from Europe, all the measurements had to be in metric units in order to be precise. If it was medicine; which was always in metric units, it would have been easy. But, you lived in San Fransokyo; not Paris.

“Where’s the recipe binder?” you asked as you tied up your hair. You’d gotten the scale ready and the mixer plugged in, but nothing could be done without the list of ingredients. Actually, the majority of the ingredients were out, but macaroons are hard to make for a reason. Plus, the café was packed with customers. It wasn’t like they had a lot of time to waste.

“Oh yeah,” Aunt Cass remembered, scribbling down an order on a piece of paper. “I had the boys take it upstairs to update it. You know how many requests we get for certain cakes and donuts. Go ahead and get it from their room upstairs. Gotta feed those hungry customers, right?”

“Right,” you agreed, heading toward the stairs that would lead you up to the living space. You’d been up there on a few rare occasions, but that was mainly because you needed certain ingredients that weren’t restocked in the bakery’s kitchen. In fact, you’d never actually met Cass’s two nephews before. Sure, you’d run into them a few times when they were screwing around with their cat; but other than that, there was very little interaction between the three of you.

You wordlessly ran up the stairs to the boys’ room, not really paying attention to the weird look that Cass’s younger nephew gave you. Thankfully, it was pretty obvious that you were one of her helpers; you’d been clocked in for only about ten minutes, and there was flour all over your pants already. Also, you had your apron crumpled up in your right hand since it had impeded your running. It would be pretty awkward if they thought you were some stalker that found out where they lived.

Searching the large desk, you looked for the large white binder. Once again, it was nowhere to be found. Dropping your hands to your sides exasperatedly, you pivoted on your heel to return back down to the café. But, you basically walked into a guy with the shoulder-to-waist ratio of a Dorito.

“You looking for something?” he asked, crossing his arms casually. You were caught off guard a little even though you knew exactly what you were looking for. His tone wasn’t very intimidating; just…curious. In fact, it was almost welcoming. Does that even make sense? The man was dressed in a way that wasn’t necessarily fashionable, but seemed to work for him. With dark brown pants, a San Fransokyo Ninjas t-shirt and a beige cardigan, he looked like a college student. He appeared to probably be half-Asian (he couldn’t be fully Asian if Cass was their biological aunt), his eyes a chocolate-brown and his hair a deep brown-almost-black color.

“Uh…yeah,” you replied, smiling slightly. He was a bit taller than you. He could’ve possibly been intimidating, but his demeanor wasn’t exactly the most frightening. In fact, he seemed quite friendly. “Cass told me that you guys have the recipe binder. And obviously, I can’t seem to find it.”

He made a sound and walked over to what you assumed to be “his side” of the bedroom. It was pretty obvious to tell who the messier one was. The younger nephew’s “side” was strewn with nuts and bolts and parts of robots. Meanwhile, the older nephew’s part of the room was as spotless as it could get. “Here you go,” he handed you the (now much heavier) binder. You tucked it under your arm as you extended your hand.

“I’m (f/n),” you started, shaking his hand. “Nice to finally meet you under semi-normal circumstances.”

His dark brown eyes twinkled as he laughed sheepishly, replying, “Tadashi Hamada. It’s nice to meet you, too. And that knucklehead over there; that’s Hiro. I’m sure that you’ve heard about him.”

“Yeah,” you chuckled, turning to leave. “I’ve heard of him. Your aunt always complains about how you two cause her to stress-eat.” You two stood there, relaxed. After all, it wasn’t as if Aunt Cass needed your help down in the café. That was sarcasm. Coming to the realization that you two were basically just standing there staring at each other/at nearby objects, “Well, those macaroons aren’t going to make themselves.” You could hear Tadashi laugh as you reached the stairs. “I’ll see you down at the café sometime?”

There was a slightly awkward pause as the question sank in, leaving both of you standing there awkwardly as Hiro watched on with slight amusement. Then, “Yeah, I’ll talk to you later.”

Character Prototype: YAMAZAKI SOUSUKE

Affiliation: Private Samezuka Academy 3rd Year (Free!ES)
Birthday: 14 September (Virgo)
Height: 185cm
Weight: 76kg
Specialty: Butterfly
Physique: Solid build of a swimmer’s body, shoulder-waist ratio of a dorito
Image motif: Whale shark
Image color: Black, emerald green
Favorite food: Tonkatsu (deep-fried pork cutlet), cola 
Least favorite food: Cinnamon
Strength: Observation
Weakness: Remembering his directions
Strong subject:  Mathematics
Weak subject: English

Staff Distribution Material / Prototype Character Sheet

(*Since this is a prototype, some parts are different from the actual show)

- A normal family (not particularly rich or poor).
- Confident, hard worker, theorist, short tempered, competitive, strong willpower.
- permanent scowl, straight-laced, solemn and doesn’t lose his composure easily..
- blunt with words, he’s the kind to say it outright if he doesn’t like something.
- doesn’t speak keigo (polite speech), curt, child of this generation, does things in broad strokes.
- Knows Rin well, a sense of manly camaraderie with him, light-hearted relationship, very frank and open
- He can hold a conversation with Rin by just using short words, he only opens up to Rin
- He sometimes teases Rin too
- He has always put his focus on sports, so his school grades aren’t very good,  just below average
- He has chronic shoulder injury due to harsh training, went through a continuous cycle of his shoulder healing and damaged again
- He realized it’s impossible to continue the path of a swimming athlete and gave up during his 2rd year high school
-  His passion has died down, he doesn’t speak much, and he seems kind of detached
- He is envious of Rin who can just jump right into action for vague reasons
- He knows about Rin’s father, and also Rin’s sentiment towards swimming relay
- He has leadership skills and all it takes to be a captain. But since Rin is in Samezuka, he doesn’t take charge.
- He knows Gou personally. There were in the same middle school (Sano Junior High School). They’re good friends. He thinks of her like a little sister, just like Rin. 

scans courtesy of @aliasanonyme

lunartickle  asked:

if you dont mind me asking, how do you draw men? For some reason, i am only able to draw girls. Thank you <3 (your art is wonderful, it makes me happy to see you draw my favourite characters :))

Ok, let’s go! See these two figures? These could be male or female (or any other gender the individual identifies as). For this exercise I will not go into detail on how it applies to many different body types (because there are so many other factors that go into body types and gender, especially fat and muscle, this is just gonna be simplified). 

What I’m saying is that you should do an exercise where you draw genderless bodies. And by that I mean, throw all the gender assumption you have about how ‘male’ bodies and ‘female’ bodies should look. This figure up here could be anything.

we see specific genders and our eyes are taught to identify specific features to them eg; broad shoulders, thick arms, the ‘dorito’ ratio thing (broad shoulders, small waist),  yet on women we see small arms, small waist, small shoulders, large chest (small small small, boobs, butt). Look past it. Women also have thick arms, broad shoulders, thick waists, men can have large butts, small shoulders, small arms.

Just experiment with drawing different features on different bodies really.

These pictures are to show that you can use your skills of drawing female bodies, or bodies you feel look feminine. This middle figure is just to show that most of the features are the same (but also that women do have their fat distributed on their thighs, butt, boobs, belly). The third figure is added muscle to the arms, shoulder and legs (this figure, like the first, can be any gender).

Chris Evans- Are you two together? (Request)

angelfuzzy2 requested: I kinda have an idea like, it’s a Chris Evans x reader , like the reader is the “new member” of the avenger universe as “Steve Roger’s” new girlfriend so she might be in “some” of the movies but anyway, like Chris and the reader are doing an interview for the new movie coming out , and they joke around, and the interviewer asks like, oh you two together: but they aren’t but eventually do get together

Hello mon friend! This is a very cute idea! But I’m a colossal stuff up and instead of reading ‘interview’ I unfortunately read ‘Panel’… I don’t even know how, I’m so sorry. So this is what I wrote and I hope it’s still ok… Sorry again. But thank you for your request! I know we don’t usually do actors but hey, he has the perfect Doritos ratio from his shoulders to waist…. this man is an exception to the universe XP Happy reading!

~Tab

You were nervous about to sitting on the panel, though you knew you shouldn’t be. You were a new member of the Captain America universe so you’d be in some of those movies, some of the Avengers and there was even secret talk of doing a cameo in an another Iron Man movie they were thinking of doing (but that hadn’t been released to the public yet and wouldn’t be if they didn’t do it). You entered and people applauded loudly and then Chris entered and the girls all screamed. Sitting at your seat you looked out into the crowd and could swear that one of the girls in the second row looked about ready to pass out. You winked at her and wide-eyed she waved back. You waved as well before looking away, looked at the other people on the panel. It was just you, Chris and the director. You opened your water bottle and took a swig from it before everyone turned to the girl now standing up with the microphone, about 5 rows in and on the left.
“Hi, this one is for Y/N…. So all we know is you’re going to be Steve Rodger’s girlfriend, is there anything else you can tell us about your character?”
You smiled, happy to be addressed. You thought for certain they’d ask Chris something first.
“Well, my character is a saucy woman… no, I’m kidding. But she is real badass, I’ll tell you that. If she didn’t embody the kind of woman that could stand up for herself and not have to rely on a man then I wouldn’t have agreed to play her. None of this ‘Oh! Save me! You’re my hero! I’m so helpless with all my female parts’ nonsense, I promise.” For some reason that made the crowd clap and you politely bowed your head. The director laughed.
“If we tried to make Y/N play that kind of role I have no doubt she would try to eat the script writers… mostly because she threatened to do that if they did….” They laughed and you blushed. You stole a look at Chris. He was very nice-looking you had to admit. The next question was asked to Chris, then the director. Then to you, director, you, Chris, you, Chris, director and so it went on. You found yourself easing up eventually, talking and laughing with everyone easily until the next question.
“This one’s for both Y/N and Chris. You play characters that are obviously together so… have their been any romantic sparks flying? Are you two together?” You blinked, stunned. What? What was the question again? Chris jumped in.
“No, no. Purely platonic…. for now.” He winked, jokingly.
“Yeah, Chris. Let me feel your bicep and see if things change.” Chris laughed and nodded so you ran over and tweaked his bicep.
“Good golly, miss Molly, things might change soon.” You joked, earning a laugh. Questions continued to pile in and Chris went and high-fived someone at some point because they were wearing a Doritos t-shirt. You laughed, “Get back here muscle man. I can’t face down questioners on my own!” He laughed back. It was thoroughly enjoyable. The crowd was laughing, you were laughing, your fellow panelists were laughing. Soon it came time for it to break up. You walked behind the curtain. The director ran off chasing down someone who had just walked past with coffee. He really was a sucker for that stuff.
Being alone with Chris, you suddenly felt the weight of that girl’s question. The one that asked if you two were together. Goddammit that bicep feel had been nice. You looked away.
“Y/N?” Chris asked gently.
“Yup? What’s up? What’s crackalackin? What’s going down? I’m going to shhhhh now.” You said, looking at him, waiting for him to reply.
“I…uh. I just wondered if you were thinking about that girl’s question?”
“What? What girl’s question. I have no idea what you are talking about… Ahahaha… Yeah.” You rubbed the back of your neck nervously and Chris smiled.
“It’s just… I was thinking… If we really were together… in real life… I think I’d be one of the happiest guys on the planet.” You looked up and then looked down at the floor.
“I’d… I’d.. uh… I’d like that to.” You were smiling a little to yourself. He went over to you and lightly grabbed your chin so you were looking up at him. He leaned down to kiss you slowly, giving you time to pull away.You looked up at his face and decided it was all or nothing, you crashed your lips into his, the two of you ridiculously happy. Chris kissed back just as passionately. You’d told the girl that you two weren’t together and that was true at that time, but that kiss… you were ready to face the rest of eternity together, facing down Hydra or panels or interviewers, you could do it together.

bakit mo sila crush
  • ayon kay @dettsu at @stilestatofry
  • arron: si arron yung lehitimong college jockey crush mo yung wala kang choice eh gwapo sya at mabait at approachable kahit na sobrang misleading ng scruff nya kaya crush mo sya kahit di lantaran, yung tipong low-key yung kilig mo kasi nga nakakatuwa at magaling syang bata ignore mo na lang yung killer biceps nya at amazing dorito shoulder to waist ratio
  • joem: si joem kasi yung tipong manang crush hahahahaha all the titas and lolas love him ganyan kasi ang cute nakakatuwa at ang bait ng mukha ang sarap pang pisilin ang mukha at misleading rin yung facial hair nya as in kislap kislap pati yung mata nakangiti sayo ganyan para syang naglalakad na teddybear at ang warm ng mga yakap nya yung dalisay nya nakakahawa isa syang spiritual cleansing pag naexperience malulunasan mga sakit mo at mabubura lahat ng mga problema mo
  • alex: si alex yung gagong friend mo sa kanto na laging andyan nakatambay tas ayaw mong pansinin pero puta nag-eexude sya ng kagwapuhan kahit initially di mo sya type he just grows on you kasi kakaibabe yung appeal nya tas pag nadagit ka na ng mga pagtaas-taas nya ng kilay at ng nunal nya sa pisngi wala ka nang takas
  • paulo: si ploo yung habulin HAHAHAHA na you dont want him pero gwapo sya eh kaya naiintindihan mo kung bakit habulin pero deep inside alam mo nerd sya na you want to protect and he has this certain charm na maliban sa objectively gwapo sya, meron syang talino at pagiging dweeb na tinatago at gusto mong maging confident sya sa ibang aspects ng pagkatao nya kasi di lang naman sya gwapo kasi he's so much more ganun at gusto mong ilabas nya yan lahat
  • art: jusko si sir art may sOMETHING SIYA NA DI KO MAEXPLAIN lalo na yung tikas at tindig nya dun pa lang nahuli ka na tas shit yung boses nya at kung paano siya magsalita lalo na kung ingles wala kang choice kundi mahumaling as in kung nag-usap kayo hahayaan mo lang syang magsalita papakinggan mo sya buong gabi kahit wala na kayong gawin maliban dun pakikinggan mo lang sya magsalita tatango ka na lang para umoo sa mga sinasabi nya kahit pagbasahin mo sya ng yellow pages makikinig ka pa rin
  • archie: naku po kakaiba rin to pero kasi sya yung tipong best friend mo na hindi mo namamalayang nafa-fall ka na pala unti unti mong narerealize yung kagwapuhan nya dahil nadadaan ka nya sa kwela at pagpapatawa pero di nya alam at di sya aware na nadaanan na rin nya puso mo
  • mon: ay dios por santo si mon pag nginitian ka nya at lumabas dimples nya itago mo na diwa mo beh kundi lulundag ng kusa ang diwa mo sa kawalan super duper bait at talented at mahal na mahal nya ang ginagawa nya at tinatrato nya with so much sweetness ang kanyang mga tagahanga na kahit hindi pa kayo pakiramdam mo alagang-alaga ka na nya
  • epy: hahaha si epy yung tipong hinahangaan mo muna dahil ang galing nya sa mga ginagawa nya pero unti unti mo ring narerealize na gwapo rin sya yung tipong bonus na lang yung cheekbones nya sa talent at ugali nyang maganda na di naman maipagkakaila
  • john: ay nako makuha ka sa bigote at sa tingin super bait at tatay vibes sa lahat ng tao kahit na naging luna sya hindi mo maiisip na capable syang magalit sa kahit kanino tapos ang dami pa nyang aso na inadopt galing sa shelter kaya alam mo may ginintuan siyang puso alam mong kayang kaya ka nyang alagaan at kaya kang panindigan pero syempre bago siya naging crush mo o nobyo mo ay mamamayan muna sya ng bansang pilipinas

anonymous asked:

could you explain me what is this doritos thing? what it has do to with steve/chris??

sure! so I think it started with a tag pointing out that Chris Evans has the shoulder to waist ratio of a Dorito 

Then someone actually photoshopped a dorito over him 

then people made things like this

and this

etc

Originally posted by dirtysouthavenger

So that was all pretty thrilling and fun but wait there is more!

On the Set of Age of Ultron Chris found out about this dorito thing (and so did the rest of the cast) Here is the full story 

This was his reaction to finding out that the internet was calling him a dorito

so now we have RDJ calling him Dorito 

Originally posted by downeysgirl94

Originally posted by booty-demonz

and funny interviews where him and Chris Hemsworth ‘taste him’ 

Originally posted by marvel-is-ruining-my-life

And that is the story!

Originally posted by tsfrce

If one of us had been a frog (Wintershock)

Happy birthday to the wonderful @forevergingeratheart - who is just as awesome in real life as she is on here. Also, I’m super far off the reservation with this - blame Netflix’s decision to release Gilmore Girls for this. 

… 

Darcy is not close with her mother. She is not close with anyone in her family. It has something to do with the whole “devil child” thing she had going on starting at age eight and ending… Not yet. 

Which is why she lives on the East Coast, as far away from her California relatives as she could be without leaving the country (and the continent). She was never good at the whole surfer thing anyway. 

The cold East Coast winters work for her - she loves coats and scarves and gloves and hats. She knits while bingewatching and her drinking habit has gotten way better. 

Except for the coffee. 

Oh God, the coffee. There is something in the coffee here that certainly wasn’t in the terrible Cali frappuchinos her family reluctantly treated her to. Or maybe it’s just the coffee in her town. 

She’s been here for two year and she’s pretty much been getting her coffee in an IV. She blames Ducky. 

Okay she knows that he’s actually called Bucky, but she loves winding him up in any way that she can. The scruffy diner owner just makes the grumpy loner look work for him. The long hair in a manbun, face mostly hidden under his baseball cap… That’s Bucky for ya. 

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