Part 2 and follow up to my Main 4 as Alcoholic Drinks post bc @earily asked that if I had more drinks for other characters that I share them, and you bet your ass I’ve got more!
(Although I see him more as part of Stan’s gang, I’m gonna include Butters here because I didn’t add him in the main 4 post)
Craig Tucker: Pisco Sour
1 cup Pisco or White Rum
1 cup Guava Nectar
2 Tsp Superfine Sugar
¼ cup Lime Juice
In a glass pitcher combine the Pisco or rum, guava nectar, sugar, and lime juice. Add a few shakes of Angostura bitters; stir well to dissolve sugar. Divide mixture among 4 glasses. add ice; top with a lime wedge and fresh mint. (This drink is traditionally made with egg whites instead of Guava Nectar, but I chose not to do that. If you want to make it the traditional way, just substitute the Guava Nectar for the egg whites! It’ll create a cool little foam on the top if you do!)
It’s been a long-standing debate in the fandom whether Craig is a bitter asshole or a guinea pig loving dork. But let’s be honest, the answer is probably a little bit of both! Like Craig, this drink is a little sweet and a little sour. Light and limey, but still strong! Not to mention it’s also the national drink of Peru, so if you’re a fan of the “adopted Craig” headcanon, then this one holds double significance!
Tweek Tweak: Spiked Thai Iced Coffee
Strong Black Regular Ground Coffee (Enough to brew 4 cups)
4 Tbsp Sugar
4 Tbsp Heavy Cream
2 Tsp Ground Cardamom
3 ounces Amaretto
Add the cardamom to the ground coffee. Brew the coffee according to makers instructions. Pour the coffee into a pitcher or large glass. Add the sugar and Amaretto, and stir to combine. Fill four 12 ounce glasses with crushed ice. Pour the coffee into each glass and top each with 1 tablespoon of cream.
It wouldn’t be Tweek without coffee! This drink is sweet and spicy, just the right thing to calm you when the anxiety is hitting hard. But luckily it’s still light enough that it won’t give you a case of the GAH jitters.
Clyde Donovan: TheCrybaby
1.5 oz. Breuckelen Glorious Gin
1 oz. Sour Beer
½ oz. Rosemary Syrup
½ oz. Lemon Juice
¼ oz. Yogurt Whey
In a cocktail shaker filled with ice, combine Breuckelen Glorious Gin, Sour Beer, Rosemary Syrup, Lemon Juice, and Yogurt Whey and shake. Mist with angostura bitters and garnish with a rosemary sprig. Serve neat.
A seriously sour sip to drown the pain of rejection, family deaths, and realizing that there’s no glory in being a pirate (Poor Clyde!). This drink is a little heavier than most others, but if you feel like bursting into tears it could be just what you need!
Token Black: Chocolate Coquito
1 can (13.5 oz) Coconut Milk
1 and ½ Bars (3.5 oz) Bittersweet Dark Chocolate
1 can (15 oz) Coconut Cream
1 can (14 oz) Condensed Milk
½ cup Evaporated Milk
2 Tsp Vanilla Extract
½ Tsp Ground Cinnamon
½ Tsp Ground Nutmeg
2 cups Light Rum
Break chocolate into medium pieces and place in a bowl. In a small sauce pan, warm up coconut milk. Once hot, pour over the chocolate and mix well until chocolate has melted and combined with the coconut milk. In a blender, combine chocolate mixture, coconut cream, condensed milk and evaporated milk. Add the vanilla, cinnamon and nutmeg. Finally, add the rum. Blend until all is well combined. Pour into glass bottles, seal well and refrigerate. Serve cold in small drink glasses and garnish with a sprinkle of shaved chocolate. Shake well before serving. (Note: This drink will become very thick once it gets cold. Let it sit out about 15 minutes before serving to thin it a bit.)
Dark and rich, sweet but not too sweet, with a calming effect and plenty of personality, now that’s a Token drink! Dark chocolate has also been shown to have brain boosting benefits, which even the naturally gifted Token wouldn’t mind, I’m sure! Should balance out the brain stupidifying properties of alcohol! …right?
Jimmy Valmer: Anabolic Steroid (Shot)
Hold a spoon against the side of the shot glass and allow the alcohol to gently pour onto the back of the spoon into the glass.The Blue Curaçao goes in first so you don’t need to do the ‘back of the spoon’ trick. Fill it about one third of the way up the glass. Next get your Midori, if it helps, rather than pour from the bottle you can pour some Midori into the Midori lid and then pour that onto the back of the spoon really really really slowly. It might look like it’s mixing but if you look from the side you can see there is a difference between the blue & green. So again, another third of the glass is filled and then finally you want to do the same with the Cointreau. Slowly filling the shot glass until you get to the top.
No, this isn’t real steroids like the ones Jimmy used to try to win the Special Olympics, but it’ll make you feel like a w-w-winner regardless! Its vibrancy and fun look is sure to be a crowd pleaser!
Butters Stotch: Topical Painkiller
2 ounces Dark Rum
1 ½ ounces Coconut Milk
3 ounces Orange Juice
3 ounces Pineapple Juice
Pineapple Wedge and Cherry to garnish
Fill cocktail shaker about half full with ice cubes. Add Dark Rum, Coconut Milk, Orange Juice, and Pineapple Juice, seal and shake. Pour into a small cocktail glass filled with ice and serve.
Sweet, fruity, and seemingly innocent, but with quiet a bit of feistiness! And after being the butt of so many jokes and suffering parental abuse for as long as he has, well, Butters could probably use some (tropical) painkillers.
Well, that’s it for this one! I guess if people like these, the next post will be drinks for the ladies of South Park!
Really sorry for the hiatus from this blog everyone! I’ve been spending most of my post-exam time catching up with friends and packing up before graduation this coming week. I’ve been doing a lot of cooking and baking in my spare time, though, so stay tuned for more recipes to come in the near future.
This is my homemade beet hummus- I love hummus and have tried a bunch of different variations on the standard chickpea-tahini base, but this is by far my favourite way of making it. Hummus is so versatile- you can use it as a sandwich spread, thinned out as a pasta sauce, a salad dressing- the possibilities are really endless! This particular beet hummus is so attractive it’d be a great dish to bring to a potluck or party too, to serve as a starter with some chips. Even if you’re not the biggest beetroot fan, you can still give this recipe a shot because the beet flavour isn’t overpowering at all- just use 1 beet instead of the 2 this recipe calls for! So here’s my recipe for a quick and easy homemade beet hummus that tastes just as good as it looks!
To make the beet hummus:
In a food processor or blender, add 1 can of chickpeas (rinsed and drained), 2 small, diced cooked beets (I buy mine pre-cooked and packed from Tesco), 2 cloves of garlic, 1 tbsp of tahini, juice of 1/3 large lemon, 1-2 tsp cumin powder (depending on your preference), ½ tsp coriander powder (optional), salt and smoked paprika to taste. Add 1 tbsp of water to help it blend- you might need to add a little more if things get stuck in the blender.
* Note: You might need to add the chickpeas ½ a can at a time if you’ve got a small food processor like me. Also, the more beets you add, the more vibrant the colour and earthy the flavour. I’ve made this recipe using just 1 beet in the past and found that both the colour and the flavour were too mild for my liking.
i can give it a shot!
a recipe to heal a broken heart
- roll all of your sharp words around in your mouth. let yourself feel them, taste them, acknowledge them, but do not swallow them, for your body is no place for the serrated glass shards of negativity they’ve left inside you
- close your eyes breathe. imagine that every clear, fresh inhale is ridding you of every sour thought, forcing every salty memory of them leaving your brain and heart on every exhale
- cease all contact with the heartbreaker, if possible. no flower ever grows while remaining under the shade of the weed that stole its sunlight. let yourself breathe and live and be free of that person’s toxicity
- do more of what you love. spend time living within the feathery pages of a book, tend to your garden and plant flowers that will touch the sky someday, make your favorite tea and let it warm your soul on the way down
- spend time with people who love you. the more you realize how much love and care you already have in your life, the more you’ll realize that those who harm you do not deserve a place in your mind or heart. this will make your heart happy
* 2/3 cup of regular vodka (pre-chilled in fridge)
* 2/3 cup of peach schnapps (pre-chilled in fridge)
* 2/3 cup of cold water
* 1 cup of boiling water
* take out your cookie sheet and place the shot glasses on it. this will make it easier to get in and out of the fridge. once the shot glasses are lined up, quickly spray them with cooking spray (the jell-o will slide out easier afterwards).
* in your first measuring cup, mix vodka and peach schnapps. using cold water (tap is fine), add until it reaches the 2 cup line. place measuring cup in fridge to chill.
* using your second measuring cup, measure just over 1 cup of water and put it in a pot on high to boil. this would be a good time to make sure your jell-o is out of the box and ready to be mixed.
* once the water is boiling, re-measure to make sure you have a full cup. pour the boiling water into a bowl and mix with both jell-o packs, stirring constantly.
* once the powder has all dissolved, take your chilled water/alcohol mixture from the fridge and mix it in with the jell-o, once again stirring constantly.
* now, use a measuring spoon or similar object to scoop out the jell-o mixture into the shot glasses. i find about 2/3 full is usually good (you want to have lots!)
* now that they’ve all been poured in and the mixture is gone, put the cookie sheet in the fridge either over night, or for at least 4-6 hours. anything less and it won’t be firm enough!
* once they’re firm, serve them to friends and enjoy!! *
“You’re halfway through your diner shift when in walks Dean. The gorgeous man captures your attention, and your apple pie catches his.”
As you finished bussing the early morning rush and dumped the last of the silverware into the dishwashing area you took a moment to adjust your bandana. You had been working at Rosie’s for two years now, on and off between classes, and you knew the lunch rush wouldn’t be in for at least another half an hour. Just as you leaned against the counter in the back of the kitchen you heard the bell on the front door chime as it opened.
“Crap…” You grabbed the dishrag from the back of your apron and wiped your hands. Coming through the swinging door you began your ceremonial, “Good morning - welcome to Rosie’s…” Your voice trailed off as you took in the broad shoulders and bowed legs that sauntered over to the counter.
“Morning.” His voice was low and husky, as if he had just rolled out of bed. He sidled up to the counter and leaned over the edge of the old cracked vinyl, taking in the sight of your snug ‘good-tip jeans’ and baggy t-shirt. It was so long you had to knot it at the back, which displayed one of your most proud and generous assets. Since he was making no effort to hide his interest you placed your hands on your hips and arched an eyebrow.
“See something you like?” A shit-eating grin spread across his face, displaying perfectly white teeth. His eyes roved up your curves and up to your eyes, his own crinkled at the edges in genuine appreciation.
This is a real easy recipe … All you need are ice cubes, sugar and lemons. Use regular size cubes (approximately 2” x 1” or so), do not use ice that you buy at a store. Too tart, too sweet? It’s just like mom’s sugo, you taste until you like… add sugar a little at a time until you get to the perfect desire. Too sweet and it’s all over with, not good.
Once you have the right combination of how you like it, write it down, now you have your very own recipe.
4 cups water 1-½ cups sugar (remember you can always add more) 5-6 large lemons (you can use less lemons with just a spurt of lemon juice)
50 ice cubes
Combine the water and sugar in a saucepan. Bring to a boil then simmer for about 5 minutes. Remove from heat and you’re off to the races, this is where it gets fun!
Now you’re ready for the blender… forgot to tell you, you need a blender… Juice all but 1 lemon, dump the juice in “the blender.” Now you take that extra lemon I was telling you about and cut it into quarters, leave the reign on this one and add it to your blender. Now add the syrup you just made, dump it in the blender. As you can see, the blender plays a big role in this whole process.
Don’t do anything with the ice… not just yet, we are saving this til the end.
Ok, almost done… blend all the ingredients in blender on medium until you achieve a smooth consistency, but don’t over blend or you will end up liquefying the ingredients… too much blending and you’re back to having sweet lemon juice… you don’t want this, I did this and it sucked.
Now this is the final and easiest part… put what you just created in the freezer for 35-40 minutes or until thoroughly chilled. Once chilled take those ice cubes I was telling you about, and now you can add them to the blender and blend everything together until thick and smooth, kind of like a smoothie. Taste and add a trickle of lemon juice and/or sugar to taste if needed.
There is no right or wrong way to do this, make it your own… it’s all in the trial and error, taste and add, taste and add… but remember at one point you need to stop. Sometimes I get carried away and end up having two blenders full, and I don’t need that much!
Now you are ready to serve.
Now I don’t drink but some folks have been known to add a shot of vodka.