I had some item digging to do for bios, so have a list of interesting items with canonical uses (or potential uses based on their canonical description) according to item descriptions:

Luminous Shortfin = Flashbang (light only)
Oasis Songbird = Leads dragons to water
Lesser Shallowshark = Probably reared by maren sharkhunters to hunt larger sharks
Pale smallmouth = Indicator species [water purity]
Withered Rose = Outhouse freshener
River Wiggler = Leech control
Lovebird = Scale cleaning
Dayglo Thresh = Magic indicator
Featherback Pelt = Bedding
Flamerest Embers = Flameless heating [baths, drinks, etc]
Glowing + Bioluminescent Tails = Lighting [lamps]
Fallout Streak Pinion - Lighting  [candle]
Carpenter Wax = Waterproofing

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coldasiceuniverse  asked:

what is ur fav type of shark

right now im super into shortfin mako sharks? I’ve loved them since I was a child since they can fuckin leap out of the water to ambush prey and that was like the coolest thing to me? They’re super interesting and really fun to learn about! They’re 10 feet long and are some of (if not) the smartest shark known to man! They have the largest brain-to-body ratio! 

also they mainly look like nervous gremlins

In honor of Chowder’s Birthday, here’s a Cryptid Dex ficlet starring Chowder.

Because I apparently can’t help myself. Read the bulletpoint fic about Dex the Cryptid here! Also for the record I know nothing about sharks so I’m POSITIVE this is all completely incorrect but you know what? I’m writing about cryptids so are we really here for scientifically accurate text? No We Are Not

Edit: actually i lied and now know a decent amount about porbeagle sharks

Chowder’s most frequent questions to Dex after he revealed himself have been about sharks. Almost constantly.

“Have you ever met a shark?”

“Where do you usually see sharks?”

“How often do you see sharks?”

“What kind of sharks do you see?”

“Do they like you?”

“… Have you ever had a conversation with one?”

Dex did have to clear up that he can’t communicate with animals. But he really doesn’t mind, their name partially comes from being mistaken as sharks anyway. Well, maybe not NEBBs like Dex in particular, but the bigger ones that live in the ocean. Technically he could be mistaken as a shark? Whatever, logistics.

Nursey made an executive decision after Chowder learned about Dex that Chowder would get a scuba license. His reasoning was that if Dex ever was forced to go into hiding, they could still act as his keepers and check up on him. A good way to do that would be to meet in the water. Plus Nursey wanted Chowder to see Dex in the water.

Nursey pays for the lessons and the license and the equipment. They store it at Dex’s parents house, Chowder meeting them for the first time when they bring it up. His parents take to Chowder a little faster than they did to Nursey, probably because they had two people they trusted telling them he’s trustworthy. That, and Chowders unadulterated enthusiasm about the entire thing ultimately put them at ease. They happily let in the ray of sunshine goalie. They were able to bring it up at the end of September, but it wasn’t until the second weekend of October that they had the chance to actually go use it. It was chilly, and the water would be cold, but they had gotten the heavy duty cold water gear for a reason. Maine water is frigid no matter what time of year you go. 

Dex and Nursey knew it was Chowder’s 20th birthday. Of course they knew. They had a few hushed conversations in the week leading up, and Dex made a few phone calls home. When it came to the weekend, Chowder’s birthday resting on a holiday, and confirmation from Dex’s brother, everything was set.

They met Dex’s brother at the dock. It was a monday holiday and they met early enough where even the most  dedicated fishermen would still be in bed or getting ready to head out. It’s the first time both Nursey and Chowder met Dex’s brother, and if they thought his parents (both at 6′5″) were intimidating, they had nothing on his brother.

Standing at 7′4″ he towered over all of them, toned muscles on display as he was only wearing spandex shorts. Nursey had a new slew of questions, as did Chowder, but they decided quickly it can wait. Dex had mentioned he hadn’t seen his brother since the beginning of summer. They were very, very happy to see each other, his brother manhandling Dex easily as Dex protested, but both doing so with a wide, toothy smile. Ultimately they hugged and talked in low voices as Nursey and Chowder loaded up the motorboat. His brother quickly slipped into the water and told Dex where to meet him before shooting off.

They got there in roughly fifteen minutes, stopping the boat and dropping the small anchor. Dex’s brother found them after another few, Nursey and Chowder getting their gear fully on. Dex quickly stripped down to his spandex as well, slipping into the water and only emerging ten minutes later when Nursey began slapping the water to get his attention. Nursey and Chowder submerged themselves, but not before Dex’s brother gave them some advice.

“She’s fine, actually really friendly. Just don’t startle her, don’t flip her over, and let her go when and where she wants to go.”

Chowder looked to Nursey for clarification, who only smiles before popping in his regulator and falling backwards into the ocean. Chowder follows.

At first he’s captured by the way Dex’s brother moves in the ocean. Fluid, like he blongs there. Like the ocean moves with him, for him, around him, instead of him moving in it. It’s breathtaking.

Then he almost screams, almost starts to cry, because under him is Dex scratching the side of a Porbeagle shark. He has a lot of emotions running through him very quickly. 

She’s larger than any of them at almost eight feet. She seems relatively disinterested in them, but does keep coming back to swim by Dex and his brother, leaning into their hands as they run them over her skin. They’re both smiling, making clicking noises Chowder is sure they can hear better than Nursey and Chowder can.

Dex ultimately brings Chowder closer to him, having him stay still by his side as they wait for the shark to pass by again. When she does, Dex takes Chowder’s hand and holds it out, holds it against her skin as she passes by. Nursey stays closer to the boat, decidedly not getting close to the shark.

They emerge once the shark has decided it’s had enough and swam off, leaving Chowder emotional and Dex and his brother smiling. They clamber back into the boat, Dex’s brother helping them by boosting them out of the water. Once Chowder is safely in the boat he rips out his regulator and starts talking.

“Oh my gosh. Oh my god! You guys! That was a porbeagle! They usually come down into the gulf of maine during this time to mate! Oh my gosh she was so gorgeous, I thought she was a great white at first!”

Dex’s brother laughs, hanging off the edge of the boat. “Yeah, that’s fako.”

Chowder whips around with a huge smile. “Yeah!!! They’re called that up here because they’re mistaken as shortfin mako’s all the time up here!”

Dex’s brother nods. “Yup, that’s her. I’ve actually gone hunting with her a few times. I wouldn’t say we’re friends, but she seems to tolerate me. I like her a lot.”

Chowder doesn’t stop talking the entire way back, only pausing once they’re back on the dock to turn to Dex and Nursey. “Thank you, you guys. This was so, so cool. I couldn’t ask for a better trip.”

Nursey and Dex take once glance at each other before turning back to their friend with a smile. “Happy Birthday, Chowder.”