shizaya confession

Pairing: Shizuo/Izaya
Theme: modern!au: confession

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Izaya adjusted the black rimmed glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. “Oh?”

“I’m falling in love with you,” Shizuo said quietly, voice dry and skin prickling with warmth. “I… fucked up.”

“…That’s not nice to say.”

“It feels like I can’t breathe without you,” he said after swallowing thickly, averting his eyes. “…I can’t live without you. I don’t…”

He hesitated and brought a hand up to push his unruly bangs away from his eyes, teeth worrying his bottom lip for a minute. Izaya said nothing; he just watched him and tilted his head.

“You’re everything to me,” Shizuo said finally and looked up. “You’re a piece of shit. You’re rude, you’re childish, you’re selfish, you can be immature. But you’re loyal. And… even though there are things that we can never agree on… being with you makes me a better person. It makes me think about things from viewpoints I never would’ve considered. It makes me… braver. You make me brave.”

He looked up again, smiled.

“…Yeah. You make me brave. Ever since I was a kid, I just wanted to protect the people I cared about. But… I got angry so easily. And I got violent so quickly. I fell in with the wrong crowd and when we met in high school… that was probably my low point. I was skipping class despite knowing how it hurt my parents and Kasuka to see me like that. But you never gave up on me. You… kept bringing me lunches. And bandaged me up when I didn’t want to go to Shinra’s. You sat with me and helped me with the lessons I missed. …I graduated because of you. I went to college because of you. …You saved my life, Izaya.”

“You taught me how to be more patient… that being kind isn’t a weakness. You taught me that sometimes overcoming a fear can be worth it. You were the one person… who never gave up. Even when I yelled… and did stupid shit. You were always calm and, fuck, I don’t know how you did it… you’ve got to be some kind of superhero except you’re not. You’d be the antagonist. Yeah. Antagonist.”

“…But I’m in love with you.”

He relaxed and closed his eyes, leaned forward until his forehead bumped to Izaya’s.

“More than anything, I’m in love with you.”

It was quiet for a few moments. Izaya’s eyes were half lidded, smiling slightly as he looked at Shizuo. He could feel the warmth radiating from him and just sighed, patting Shizuo’s hand that held one of his own. “Shizu-chan, yes, I know all that. This is why we’re married. Go back to sleep, you’re still running a fever.”

He helped him lie back down, pulled the blankets up to his shoulders. Izaya leaned back so the curve of his spine met the headboard again as he continued reading. He felt the weight of Shizuo’s arm drape across his hips and smiled, decided he only needed one hand to hold his book and ran the fingers of his other one through Shizuo’s hair.

“You’re so cheesy, Shizu-chan…”

Requested by anonymous

Pairing: Shizuo/Izaya
Theme: au!confessions

“I like someone.”

In all the years they’d had been best friends–which was seven, Izaya had calculated–those words had never been said. He looked up from his lunch in surprise and it took a moment to settle the immediate rising jealousy, giving a smirk as he watched Shizuo uncap his milk and take a sip.

“Ah, I see… that’s rare for Shizu-chan. Congratulations must be in order, hm?”

Seventeen-year-old Shizuo, as far as to Izaya’s knowledge, had only ever had a crush on the milk lady. Since then, he seemed more preoccupied with milk and pastries than crushes and that was probably why Izaya’s immediate not-very-fitting-of-a-supportive-best-friend reaction.

He never had to face the idea of losing Shizuo, so he didn’t know what to do when it seemed to be happening.

Giving a small shrug, Shizuo shifted a bit awkwardly. “Not really… I don’t know if he feels the same way.”


“What kind of a person is he?” Izaya asked, taking out an apple and biting into it. “I’m curious as to know who caught Shizu-chan’s eye…”

“He’s…” Shizuo hesitated before rubbing his nose. “…Tactless. He’s annoying sometimes… like how he always gets the top grade in the class without even studying. He says that my taste preferences seem to have forgotten to grow up and still always takes a sip of my milk because–”

“Oh, God.”

Feeling his chest seize immediately, Shizuo looked up. Had Izaya figured it out?, he thought, heart racing; he knew that Izaya was smart and while part of him wanted him to know that he was the one Shizuo was in love with, the other part was terrified as to what it would do to his friendship.

When he looked over, Izaya looked appalled and disgusted and Shizuo felt his heart break.


“Izaya, I–”

“Is it Shinra? Shizu-chan’s in love with Shinra?”

“…What the fuck–”

Shizu-chan, trust me, Shinra is not the kind of guy you want to be after–”

“He’s not–!”

“He’s worse than I am, even if he says he isn’t. I’ve seen him set fire to ants and I know that Shizu-chan likes to protect ants–”

“Izaya, shut up, you’re the one I’m in love with!!”

Heiwajima Shizuo never thought he’d manage to catch Izaya speechless and gaping.


“Really,” Izaya says, leaning in so close to Shizuo that he catches the ends of blond hair at his lips. “Who really enjoys weddings?”

“Shut up,” Shizuo says without looking at him. When he swings his knee wide the impact bruises against Izaya’s thigh; Izaya would cringe, if he were the sort of person to cringe at just a bruise. “People who care about the bride and groom are supposed to be happy for them.”

“Sure,” Izaya drawls, tipping his weight in to push back at Shizuo’s knee against his leg. “If we could hide in the crowd and not be up on display with them.”

“Like that’s stopping you,” Shizuo says, reaching for his wineglass. Izaya watches his throat when he swallows, the motion of the action working just over the white of his collar and the dark of his tie. “You’re being exactly as irritating as you always are.”

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Pairing: Shizuo/Izaya
Theme: modern!au: confessions

“…I’m in love with you.”

Shizuo didn’t drink, but Izaya talked him into a bar on a Tuesday night, wanting to know why his college roommate was sad and quiet instead of just quiet.

Shizuo was by no means loud, when he wasn’t angry, but this silence was odd. They’d been roommates for their last two years in college, moved out and decided to find an apartment together as they started their post-grad life. Izaya was working and Shizuo had decided to take a year off before going back for more school, currently taking on odd little jobs to accompany his part-time one at a bar. He used what he did make to pay rent, and so Izaya had no problem with it. Shizuo tried and that was enough.

But every night when Izaya came home, he’d find Shizuo sulking, emanating this aura that made Izaya almost want to not step in. Shizuo never wanted to talk, which was fine by Izaya, but the silence was so heavy that Izaya, who liked to think he was free of human troubles such as feeling, would feel weighed down.

So he took him out, ordered a light beer for Shizuo and whiskey for himself, and waited. He’d ordered him to tell him what was wrong, or they weren’t going home. “Frankly, Shizu-chan, this is unfortunate for our living situation. So whatever it is, tell me. I’ll take care of it, yeah?”

And Shizuo had confessed with the bottle to his lips, the whispers between his mumbles causing faint whistles. Izaya’s hand froze, glass in midair. Of everything, he hadn’t expected that.


“I know you don’t feel the same way,” Shizuo grumbled, free hand tousling his hair. “So I’ll… I’ll get over it. Don’t worry.”

Izaya had a rather bad history in terms of being confessed to. In most cases, he’d seize the opportunity. It wasn’t anything to be proud of, but he fell very easily into manipulating their feelings without ever once lying and accepting the confession. He could get them to do whatever he wanted, thus making his own little plans much easier to execute, and never felt any remorse when they finally figured it out and were hurt and angry.

But Shizuo was different.

Izaya had no intention of doing that to him.

“…Thank you for telling me, Shizu-chan,” he said quietly, rubbing his thumb on the glass of his drink. “But, like you said…”

“I know,” Shizuo sighed, cutting him off tiredly. “Shinra told me you’d… well,” he paused and looked at him with a pained smile that had Izaya frowning, “he said you’d be an ass but… I don’t know. This is one of the times where you actually seem… nice.”

Izaya blinked and smiled, lifted his glass and clinked it to Shizuo’s.

“Shizu-chan’s special.”