The three pages of notes between Eric Harris and Kristi Epling from German class. (JC-001-012993, JC-001-012995, and JC-001-012996.) Kristi was so afraid to have these notes in her possession after the massacre that she sent them to a friend in St. Louis for safekeeping, but the friend went to the police with this “tip,” which is why it’s in the “Tips” section of the documents.
Guten fuckin tag. [Good fuckin day.] Frau [the German teacher] sucks, but German rules! thanks for letting me copy allllll that stuff in Deutsch, Hist and chem. Kritzer sure is one Helluva spaz huh. well, our junior year is at an end, woop-de-flippin-do-da, we will be top of the food chain soon. hey, stay away from those Frostys (redacted…), they might explode some day by no fault of mine! and you could get hurt. hey, your smart, do something cool when you grow up. Gott weiss ich will kein engel sein. [God knows I don’t want to be an angel, from the Rammstein song “Engel”.] oh well. ready for some philosophy? not yet? or… [redacted] and [redacted] need to burn, those pricks will get what’s coming soon. thanks for listening to my problems and shit, bla bla–other nice thoughts–yadda wadda so so so…ok, time for philosophy: Nihilism, Anarchism, and several others are all wrapped up into 1 ball called my head. society wants to get rid of any human instincts we may have, like Kritzer said a few times, the industrial age and factories and shit, all to better the community and lessen the human part of life, “sit in order, be respectful, don’t talk out loud, drive safely, don’t run, don’t lie, bla bla don’t don’t” why the FUCK not!!! we are humans, we should use our brains for something besides memorizing cube roots. the things that put us above animals is our brains, and society wants to flatten it out. they don’t want thinkers and dreamers, only thinkers and dreamers who think and dream about how to be successful and be a good citizen. Anyone who shows more thoughts or emotion than the norm is said to be wierd or crazy, wrong! they are just more in touch w/their humanity, and people who think they can sum up mankind in simple lame quotes piss me off. like “there are 2 kinds of people…the quick and the dead…the smart and the dumb…leaders and followers…” well you fucks are wrong!! The only 2 kinds of people are male and Female!!!!! the rest is B.S. follow your instincts, be free from all, listen to no one, be SELF AWARE!! step back and look at what you are doing, do you look stupid? smart? silly? foolish? that’s why I acted like I did at After prom, have you ever watched, actually watched someone dance? it is ridicu.o…lus. people are funny, they want to be accepted. don’t be afraid to judge people either. people say you shouldn’t judge others because that’s not how they are on the inside…well oh fucking well and to flippin bad, your impression of someone is what they seem like, and if they are to caught up and stupid to have their true self most obvious, then that’s their choice. if they look like a lame gothic black devil wannabe then damnit that’s what they want you to think and boom, verdict made. well, how was that for a trip through the mind of a wise one? I hope you liked it, if you didn’t I don’t care anyway!! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
[cut off] sehen du spater [see you later]
(Mr. Kritzer was Eric’s teacher for world history in the second semester of junior year and philosophy in the second semester of senior year.)
On the side:
Dieses ist Kostenzahler-kultur von der unterirdischen…eternal Umdrehung die dieses unser stichhaltiges…KMFDM ist, das besser als das beste…megalomaniacal ist und stark als der Rest. –Sascha K.– KMFDM
[This is counterculture of the underground…eternal revolution, this is our sound…KMFDM is better than the best…megalomaniacal and harder than the rest.]
(Note: this is from the KMFDM song “Megalomaniacal”)
Kristi: did I make your hit list yet?
Eric: nope, yer on my “Semper Fi” list. but [redacted] still is in the top 5, along with this asshole named [redacted] or [redacted] or something.
(arrow to “Semper Fi”) Semper Fidelis
always faithful. motto of the USMC
Kristi: that’s fine, he knows that. he wants off, or rather, he doesn’t want to die anytime soon
Eric: He will always be under the gun and in the sights since he hit me in the face, even though it didn’t hurt at all. Until I get to hit him back I will always be pissed at him. and his dickhead friend too, If they want “off” then tell them to show some fuckin respect to their elders (me and dylan) and never make another smart ass remark about us or to us.
Kristi (arrow from redacted): who is this guy?
Eric: Just some faggot punk ska skater shitface who always makes fun of my kleid (German for “clothes, dress”) so I told him to shut the fuck up about it, and he is such a disrespectful smart ass and today he comes up and says “what’s up” in his little smart ass tone so I yelled at him
Kristi: if you’re going to be pissed @ me for being w/[redacted], then that is your thing, but I think that it’s stupid. I’m still the same person, I didn’t change just b/c I’m w/him, but you are going to do what you will.
Eric: exactly. but I didn’t think you would go out w/someone like him. but oh fuckin well es ist mir scheiss egal. [it’s all shit to me/I don’t give a shit.] does he still want me to be nice to him?
Kristi: I’m sorry I let you down, but I’m happy w/him (for now), he never wanted you to be nice to him, he just didn’t want you to kill him (he’s definitely scared of you.)
Eric: well, if he will let me punch him in the face and not tell a single authoritive figure (not get me in trouble) then I will be happy. I’ll even fuckin say “Hi” to him when he’s w/you. he’ll get down to around “#90” on my “shitlist” which is basically neutral. his friend is another story though.
Kristi: I’ll tell him, but I don’t know –[redacted] is a dork, I don’t give a shit about him, so you can do what you wish to him.
Eric: oh we will. I don’t expect [redacted] to let me do that either, so until he does not a damn thing will change
Kristi (arrow to “oh we will”): You and Dylan?
Kristi: that’s cool, I’d probably the same way if it was me
Eric: I just don’t want the little fuck going to admin or the cops and start whining that we are threatening him or intimidating him. because if I get in ANY more trouble w/cops I will fucking lose it.
anyone who actively encourages the harassment of content creators under the guise of “keeping fandom spaces safe” and the people who support that shit are not as good as they present themselves to be :)
It wouldn't make sense that Harry would stay with Sony if they're the ones behind still making Louis be a fake dad because that's still going on so does that mean maybe Sony isn't the one behind babygate
Sony is/was the most powerful player over One Direction and Louis (they’re a wayyyyyy bigger dog than Modest and they’re bigger than Simon/Syco, more so now than ever since they bought out so much of Syco), so I think the idea that they don’t have a hand in babygate is pretty ridiculous. Sony also could have stepped in to better promote MITAM and to stop Simon’s really obvious smear campaign against One Direction (and especially Louis) in the months leading up to the hiatus and they didn’t, I’m assuming because they knew One Direction would not be re-signing with any Sony label as a band, so that definitely puts Sony on my shitlist as well.
I’m not going to pretend that I don’t struggle to understand why Harry would want to sign with Columbia/Sony because I don’t really get it at all - and this isn’t just a Larry thing because I think Sony fucked Harry over too because of how they handled things with One Direction when the clock started ticking on their contracts. However, I also know that there’s a lot we don’t know about how literally ANY of this went down - One Direction’s decision not to re-sign, how things were with Sony/Syco/Columbia behind the scenes, babygate (how it started, why it’s still going on, and how it’s going to end), Harry’s decision to sign some type of deal with Columbia and Sony, the details of that deal, and so on. And we also don’t know how the mess Louis is dealing with is going to be cleaned up and what label he’ll want to pursue future projects under (though I’m guessing it won’t be a Sony label considering they’ve napped through the entirety of JHO promo). We don’t know what was brought to the table in negotiations and what deals with the devil any of these boys have had to make to get even part of what they wanted because I think it’s clear that there were limitations on them (and there still seem to be, at least when it comes to Louis).
None of us wanted Louis to put out music under Syco and none of us expected him to considering the abuse they’ve hurled on him over the years, but JHO was distributed through them, so Louis clearly had to make a deal with the devil as well. And I’m not going to be one of those bloggers who pretends Harry and Louis were on an equal playing field with anything because I don’t think they are. I think Louis has been at an disadvantage for YEARS and for whatever reason, especially in 2015, Sony and Syco really had it out for him significantly more than any of the other boys, but I do think the example with JHO shows that the boys sometimes do things that aren’t ideal from our perspective and that probably aren’t ideal from their perspective either, and we don’t know the probably very complicated reasons for it and likely never will.
So I’m just trying (very very hard) to put my reservations and bitterness toward Sony aside and I’m just waiting to see what happens going forward.
1. The person who made the first shitlist. 2.- And his/her followers.
Ok. Its all! Avoid that toxicity guys! They are real bad persons! Feel free to enjoy the things you like, bc you’re a person who don’t deserves be judged but that! These things don’t define the way you are! Be happy, live and let live <3 ship whatever you wanna ship, after all, are just cartoons.
DUDE I'M PERSONALLY OFFENDED THAT YOU DIDN'T MAKE THE SHITLIST BECAUSE??? YOUR PORN IS THE BEST ABSOLUTE FILTH EVER PLUS #STUFFYUURIKATSUKIFULLOFCOCK2K17??? WHAT MORE DO THEY WANT I'LL FIGHT THEM and also belated happy birthday it's amazing that the world has experienced 30 amazing years all thanks to your continued existence <3<3<3
IF YOU THINK I’M NOT WRITING MORE OTAYURI PORN OUT OF SPITE, YOU’RE WRONG.
Also thank you so much! I’ve received so many beautiful and hilarious messages – both about my birthday and the shitlist – and it made for a wonderful 30th birthday. I love and adore all of you.
- there is always a line. It’s 3am and you pull in behind 5 cars.
- you order a water in a medium sized cup. They hand you a small cup at the window. You ask them for a medium cup again. They are confused. They hand you a small water cup. You ask for a medium cup of water. They are confused.
- “Welcome to McDonald’s, I’ll be with you in a moment” says the voice box. You wait patiently. The other line is moving. Cars line up behind you. The voice box is silent. It has been many moments, but they are still not with you.
- Breakfast all day, the menu tells you. You do not want breakfast. Breakfast all day. Breakfast all day. Breakfast all day.
- you order two cheeseburgers with no mustard. One cheeseburger has extra pickles. There is no second cheeseburger.
- the fries are not always crispy, they are not always hot, but they are always salty.
- the sun slides across the sky. You have begun to sweat and shake. There is a mile of cars behind you. The voice box is silent still.
- the Coke is pure and sweet. The Coke gives you a reason to live again. Here, we live and we die by McDonald’s Coke.