*Inspired by “The History of the whole world, I guess” and “The History of Japan.” I’m gonna put this on every one I do but guys you gotta mentally read this in the voice of Bill Wurtz; that means tone, jingles, sound effects, and all or it is not gonna be as entertaining.*
Welcome back, remember those people we were talking about? Yeah the ones who thought you were a hacker, those people. Let’s say you started liking someone. Y’know like, like like them. What’s that called?
See that purple one? Wow that one looks appealing, let’s take that one. His name is Jumin Han and he’s a Christian!
But that really doesn’t matter cause it only comes into play once. Anyway, surprise! His dad wants to marry a woman. A rich woman. Actually a gold-digging woman. “Why does he want that?” you might ask. I don’t know, good question. Guess he thinks she loves him or something.
Her name is Glam Choi. But Jumin doesn’t like this, cause his dad’s with tons of women all the time and they always break up anyway. “Wow this is stupid. And it sucks,” says Jumin to his cat. Did I mention he has a cat?
“I also have a wife for you,” says Jumin’s dad who’s the chairman of the big company that they own. Yeah they own a big company that’s why gold diggers want him. “oh shit,” Jumin says. So now Jumin has a fiance that he doesn’t want and he’s already having trouble processing feelings because you make him feel nice inside. Real nice, y’know?
oh by the way this is that fiance that he doesn’t want
So now Jumin and his dad are fighting. Well not like fighting fighting, they just..aren’t..on..good terms. Jumin’s not only trying to juggle having a sudden fiance that he doesn’t like and having to fight with his dad because of this sudden fiance that he doesn’t like, but now he just realized he has feelings for you. Y’know. Feelings. For you: The
“Hey you,” says that albino guy who’s also in the group, “I had this crazy premonition, your cat is gonna disappear, you should be worried.”
“That’s stupid,” Jumin says, “that’s ridiculous, premonitions aren’t real, fuck this, I’m not listening to you,”
“Hey, you,” says that fiance that Jumin doesn’t want, “love me, aren’t I hot, I can buy my own bags, just marry me cause I’m great”
“Yeah she’s totally great, you should marry her,” says the gold digging woman Jumin’s dad is marrying.
”Yeah you gotta marry her because you’re my son and you need a wife,” says his dad. Yeah his dad basically calls him a lonely loser. Jumin is now completely paranoid that everything will go wrong and that his cat’s gonna get taken so he locks it in a cage.
“Woah,” says Jumin’s assistant, “Guys this is serious, he’s losing his mind, we gotta do something.” So after a not very long discussion they all decide that you need to go and see him.
And so you go and see him-
“You’re not leaving,” Jumin says, “it’s for your safety. Also I like you. But it’s mainly for your safety because of that hacker guy who brought you to our group. So don’t leave. I’m forbidding you.”
You realize that you have to help him and tell him nice things to keep him calm. But then his cat escapes. Shit, now this is gonna get worse. “I know what it is,” Jumin says, “I just couldn’t get over an unrequited love from the past and I was projecting it onto my cat. Now that my cat is gone, I can focus more on you. Now you’re never leaving. Also it’s for your safety.”
You still try to help, but everyone else is really worried about you.
By worried I mean they don’t trust your judgement of the current situation. Jumin’s slowly becoming more obsessive but you’re doing your best to tell him that this shit is gonna smooth over.
It is now the day of the party. Oh yeah did I mention you’re a party coordinator for this group now? Well you are. The hacker issue has been resolved for the most part, the cat has been found, and Jumin’s no longer as obsessive. He’s realized that he just wants to be with you and plans to announce this right in front of everyone at the party. Which consists of his dad and his dad’s new fiance and that fiance for him that he doesn’t want and also the news crew..y’know like the media? There’s a lot of people there.
So he does that! Yay! Sarah, Glam, and Jumin’s dad are kinda pissed at him for that but whatever, now you guys can get married and live together.
i know there’s a lot of these floating around and already made, but i wanted to have my own list with my personal favorite lyrics that i can refer to for my own tags. i thought it might be helpful to others, so here we are !! under the cut, you’ll find 1,000 different lyrics that are organized into various categories ( general/misc, slow burn, betrayal, unrequited, & more ) based on my interpretation on them. this list has everything from smokey robinson to dear evan hansen to eminem, so it should also be very diverse. trigger warnings will be placed in the categories they have them in. also, some words have been changed so they make more sense. let me know about any spelling mistakes or triggers i may have missed, as well as any lyrics i may have put in the wrong section. please like/reblog if you use or found this helpful, and most importantly, enjoy !!
hello everyone!! today i hit my first thousand!! ive only been on this website for about 2 months so the fact that ive already hit a thousand already is absolutely insane to me!! im so incredibly overwhelmed with genuine happiness and love for each and every one of you, whether we talk or not, i love you immensely and care about you more than you could ever imagine. one thousand individuals all with you own thoughts and feelings and problems and lives, i love you all and i cant thank you enough.
now that being said, im gonna be doing a follow forever!!
peoples whos usernames are bolded are people im in a groupchat with ( i obviously love you guys so much its just easier on me to do that)and my favs on here are italicized :)