shit i make that nobody uses

anonymous asked:

I don't understand why a lot of folk that frequent 4chan insist on being grudging elitist and spiteful assholes. Possibly due to the whole self-depreciative, condescending humor and mentality of any chan board. But damn. Anyone can hop on and make a shit green post or complain about waifus and neckbreads. Sorry you got to do deal with that tom-fuckery. :L

i could sit here and explain how people who use 4chan feel like members of a special club for frequenting the place that the internet largely regarded as “that place you don’t go” for a couple of decades, or i could analyze how 4chan went from a relatively welcoming place that put up a shocking exterior to a genuinely shit place where nobody is pretending to be bastards, but frankly i just don’t have the energy for it right now 

but my bad mood has nothing to do with dumb greentexters here on the hellsite. if anything, they lighten my mood because i love to make fun of them.

nah, my bad mood is just a bunch of personal things weighing down on me right now. 

thanks for the sympathy regardless though 

For your consideration: Jack Zimmermann, Samwell graduate, still says “making a murder run” to mean “going to Stop & Shop” and the Falcs are so confused.

EX: “Ah, shit.  We’re out of snacks.”

“It’s okay, I can make a murder run.”

and 

“Zimboni!  Come play Mario Kart with us.”

“I’m on a murder run, I’ll head over after.”

Everyone assumes it’s probably a workout thing but like…the context is always wrong?  And nobody really wants to ask because if Zimboni calls it a murder run, they all fear for their legs if they’re invited along.  So it is just this vaguely unsettling mystery until after he and Bitty are out and have the guys over for dinner and Bitty asks,

“Jack, honey, we’re out of butter, do you mind making a murder run?” and as soon as Jack leaves the team just point blank is like “wtf is a murder run already” and Bitty explains Murder Stop & Shop and everyone is super relieved.

it’s important to remember we’re a community and nobody is better than anybody else because of the amount of zeros on the end of their follower count

i felt the need to say that because (especially recently) i get a lot of people telling me they feel left out and upset because yeah favouritism exists and in the past people have let their follower counts go to their heads as if it defines their worth or makes them famous or something

there should be no weird hierarchy or cliques this isn’t high school most of us come on here to escape that shit

we share a mutual love for two giant nerds who love us just as much and that’s the only thing that matters here

we’re just people who blog and have fun and laugh and make friends and that’s all this should be - fun.

you’re all rad as heck.

» the walking dead sentence meme

Feel free to adjust sentences to make it fit your muse better!

  • ❝ We’ll win. But we need to wait for the right moment. ❞
  • ❝ It ain’t just about getting by here. It’s about getting it all. ❞
  • ❝ It’s because you got no guts. ❞
  • ❝ If you knew us, if you knew anything, you would kill us. But you can’t. ❞
  • ❝ I’d like to take it back to awkward silence now. ❞
  • ❝ Kid. I ain’t gonna lie. You scare the shit out of me. ❞
  • ❝ If you keep thinking everyone’s an enemy, then enemies are all you’re gonna find. ❞
  • ❝ Do soy sauce packets count as food? ❞
  • ❝ Nobody’s evil. They just decide to forget who they are. ❞
  • ❝ Some people are evil. I’ve seen it. That’s why I have to get back now. ❞
  • ❝ I’m not saving you anymore. ❞
  • ❝ I’m dealing in certainties, and I’m doing my part to give them what they want. ❞
  • ❝ I love a gal that takes me to dinner and doesn’t expect me to put out. ❞
  • ❝ In case you haven’t caught on, I just slipped my dick down your throat, and you thanked me for it. ❞
  • ❝ You’re lucky. Don’t forget. ❞
  • ❝ I get why you did it. Why you took it. You were thinking about someone else. That’s why I can’t. ❞
  • ❝ You should know, there is no door number four. This is it. This is the only way. ❞
  • ❝ People can try and you set you in the right direction, but they can’t show you the way. ❞
  • ❝ I don’t give a shit if you think you’ve found the secret to life. ❞
  • ❝ People want someone to follow. ❞
  • ❝ Drink from the well, replenish the well. ❞
  • ❝ Was the joke that bad? ❞
  • ❝ Suck my nuts. ❞
  • ❝ You can breathe. You can blink. You can cry. Hell, they’re all gonna be doing that. ❞
  • ❝ We got here together, and we’re still here. ❞
  • ❝ You’re a survivor. You always were. ❞
  • ❝ When they come for us, we’ll end it. The whole thing. ❞
  • ❝ There is no right; there’s just the wrong that doesn’t pull you down. ❞
  • ❝ I don’t take chances anymore. ❞
  • ❝ Dibs is dibs. ❞
  • ❝ You want to live, you take chances. ❞
  • ❝ I’m going like I should have. Don’t come after me, please. ❞
  • ❝ I’m not planning to die today. ❞
  • ❝ We have to come for them, before they come for us. ❞
  • ❝ Why are dingleberries brown? ❞
  • ❝ We’re going to have to fight. ❞
  • ❝ This is the next world. ❞
  • ❝ Your world’s about to get a whole lot bigger. ❞
  • ❝ I like you people. I trust you. Trust us. ❞
  • ❝ You need to know things aren’t as simple as they might seem. ❞
  • ❝ Confrontation’s never been something we’ve had trouble with. ❞
  • ❝ You still got family and you still got a home. ❞
  • ❝ It should be someone who loved her. Someone who’s family. ❞
  • ❝ I want to show you the new world. ❞
  • ❝ Someday this pain will be useful to you. ❞
  • ❝ The only thing that keeps you from being a monster is killing. ❞
  • ❝ You point a gun at me, and I’m the asshole? ❞
  • ❝ Things moved slow here, and then things just started moving fast, too fast. ❞
  • ❝ Things aren’t as simple as four words. ❞
  • ❝ The people around you dying, that’s the hard part. ❞
  • ❝ The world is trying to die. We’re supposed to just let it. ❞

Riot, Protest, Start Shit. 

We’ve tried peaceful protests and nobody listens. Every liberal peaceful protest is met with a flood of people calling us whiners and mocking us. If they won’t listen to peaceful protests the only option is militancy. Make it so that they have no other option but to address our concerns, they have ignored us too long.

I support the actions taken by the citizens of Berkeley to stand up for what they believe in. 

That type of love

I need that 90s type of black love that Erykah Badu and Andre 3000 love that we teaching each other knowledge of self type love she not afraid to kiss me public type of love that matching airbrush tshirts type of love I need that type of love that dates at the arcade type of love, we having motivational conversations she speaking and reaching and I could see this future with her so I believe it she be swaying her hips like a goddess when she on that dance floor like nobody in the room but us I can feel it in the air it’s actual love brewing she my ride or die but not on some Bonnie & Clyde shit she just her man by all means it goes vice versa we on our conscious shit we was building on some trying to be my wife type shit but like METHOD MAN said “word life you don’t need a ring to be my wife just be there for me and imma make sure we be living a fucking lap of luxury" I need that we wrap each others hair before bed love, that we cute out in public love, that we always silly type love

Lol Trump

Oh man, I woke up to the news of Trump bringing up Sweden. Sweden! :o Apparently some shit went down last night, but nobody here in Sweden knows what it is. People are talking about a horrible terrorist attack.

So naturally, I’m like, holy crap, did something happen in Switzerland?! Since many Americans don’t know the difference. But they seem fine as well, luckily. 

Yeah, shit, I have no idea. You’d think the President of the United States wouldn’t, you know, make shit up about other countries, but times are changing it seems.

Next he’ll include us in a speech how Sweden is on fire and the muslims are raping everyone everywhere so you guys gotta go through with that immigration ban that he wants so badly so you don’t end up the same way. Because you see that shit spammed in every article and video about this country so clearly it must be true. It’s probably on his favorite shit-tier news channel.

I wish I was joking when I said that some Americans seriously believe that shit to be true though. In real fucking life.

But shit, if we were on fire, maybe it wouldn’t be so fucking cold and dark all the time. Eh? EHHHHH?

Originally posted by yakawa

Ok tumblr, defend this.

http://www.inquisitr.com/3854691/black-lives-matter-kidnapping-torture-white-kid-brittany-herring/

I dare you, Tumblr, to find a way to defend this without using the same shit you always do like “Blacks are oppressed” and “He’s a cis white male” it is not possible.

If by some means you actually somehow think this is able to be defended, then you are the actual racist here. No matter the color of someones skin, their beliefs, or what they support, NOBODY deserves to be tortured, absolutely no one.

But knowing this site you will all somehow find a way to defend this using some backwards ass logic that makes no sense.

I hate when people comment “excuse my eq.” I don’t hate people who do, it just makes me sad.

Stand by that shit. Say “I’m still learning, and that’s okay.” Use it as a tool. Identify what parts of your equitation (position or otherwise) you need to fix, and work on them. Get better. Own your journey. This is YOUR riding, and nobody does it like you.

I am the FIRST to say I overuse my left rein and I sit crooked on my horse. That doesn’t mean I think I’m a bad rider, just that I see something I can make better and cleaner.

Sure, doesn’t mean it’s an excuse for poor riding. But it also doesn’t mean you have to be ashamed of trying to make it better.

Taurus Sun Aquarius Moon - Exanonanon please,perience with Signs

Aries - They are really amazing fun friends who were always there for me in my time of need. But in exchange I have to be supportive and understanding of all their crazy impulsive usually Bad decisions. But somehow, they always make it out alright???? So envious of how fearlessly true to themselves they are.

Taurus - I love Taurus, they are sweethearts. But somehow I find it hard to get close to them. Maybe because we are both used to ppl appraching us and making the first steps? Idk. Anyway fun fact, I’m usually super attracted to visual mediums made by other Tauruses. Taurean directors, designers, and editors are always my fave. Does this happen to anyone else?

Gemini - Gems are so fun. Nobody can get me talking like a Gem. Kings and Queens of banter (which is perf for me because too much talking abt deep shit can leave me feeling exhausted tbh). Also non-judgemental so I can be as weird as I want. Hard to get close to tho and their restlessness is tiring for me. My fave musical artists are Gemini.

Cancer - I attract so many cancer friends??? The Ultimate Mom Friends. At theit best, they are super loving and caring and will remeber tiny details about you. But also they expect u to read their minds and u may accidentally hurt their feelings by breathing. And if they don’t like someone… do NOT bring them within two hundred meter radius of them. But still, the truest of friends.

Leo - Competitive and prideful AF. When something good happens to u, u never feel like they can be truly happy for you. At the same time, they are so fun to be around and can make even the most redundant task into a Good Time. They know how to make people around them feel special and will defend u when ppl talk behind ur back.

Virgo - I have a hard time vibing with Virgos. Maybe bc we are both detached af. Also Im air dom so I find virgos too grounded into reality for me if that makes sense? They are also judgemental. But from far, they seem like cool people that got their shit together and I admire that. All the cool minimalist aesthetic, and super organized fandom blogs I follow are ran by them. Great eye for editing and super informative.

Libra - Forever that friend I really hit it off with one time at that one party but we never actually get around to hanging out. Hilarious af and conversation flows easily with them. However, can be a bit too clingy and socially needy imo. Stop trying to get validated by others, please.

Scorpio - They into that mind reading shit cancers are into. Love to tell me about myself and fuck it, sometimes they are right. Always up to have those deep soul-searching conversations (then I go talk to my Gemini friends to relax). Intense, passionate, and exude a lot personal magnetism. But my air moon self can get exhausted trying to keep up with their emotionally draining asses.

Saggitarius - I can count on them to make me feel like I live the most boring existance of life. They always have MORE experiences that were BETTER and more life-changing. Oh and they could be hanging with like 4 different people that are more important than you at the moment, just fyi. But once you get past their self-aggrandizing bs, they are freaking hilarious and suprisingly generous. Btw a big no (for me) to the super bossy ain’t-shit sag men.

Capricorn - I literally don’t know a single capricorn like that. Where my cap men at? I have a Cap descedant and venus in 10th so Im trynna holla at y'all.

Aquarius - Used to be my least favourite sign, then I found out its my moon lol. They truly believe they are Perfect and beyond reproach. Always talking about how things Should Be but not doing a damn thing about it. Like idg why they have such big egos when they arent even doing anything with their lives???? Well, at least they are smart well-informed people. And they try really hard to appear as inclusive and non-judgemental as possible. (Key word: appear)

Pisces: Their hair is so big because its full of secrets! Seriously, Im quite secretive but even I will find myself opening up to them without even thinking. They just have such an approachable, open and receptive air. Strangers also seem to randomly approach them a lot so when hanging out with them u oddly meet new people like that. Idk its strange. They are nice but be careful. If u hurt them, they wont hesitate to demolish u in the ugliest way possible.

it’s so tiring that people criticize and hate on european players for the most trivial bullshit!! like i regularly see europeans get shit for stuff that nobody would blink an eye at if a north american player did/said it. they’re always called cocky for being confident and showoffs for having the audacity to use their skill in a FREAKING NHL GAME?? THEIR DREAM THEY’VE BEEN WORKING AT THEIR WHOLE LIVES?? do you think tomas hertl would have been hated by half the nhl just for being talented if he was a good canadian boy™? it’s like a simple language barrier makes people unable to understand that sometimes people express confidence in different ways and it’s difficult to stay perfect under the intense pressure of the media, especially when english isn’t your first language. im so done

Someone: *posts a short and sensible self-defense tip*

Tumblr Expert 1: OH YEAH MAN LET ME TELL YOU HOW TO BEAT UP THE ROBBERS ON THE TRAIN WITH YOUR IPHONE USING IT AS A MACE AND CHAIN WITH THE CHARGE CABLE. BE SURE TO PEPPER SPRAY YOURSELF IN THE EYES EVERY DAY TO BUILD UP A TOLERANCE TO YOUR ASSAILANT’S FLYING SEMEN COUNTERATTACK. IF YOU’RE DISABLED THAT’S OKAY YOU CAN JUST WEAR SWIMMING GOGGLES AT ALL TIMES. NOBODY SHOULD JUDGE YOU FOR TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF.

Fandom Contributor: HOLY SHIT HERMIONE DID THAT IN MY FANFIC I CAN’T BELIEVE CONFIRMED FOR REAL

Tumblr Expert 2: If you can’t afford an iPhone, though, you can ABSOLUTELY make a defensive hand grenade by jamming your keys into your soda and shaking it up real hard! Be sure to close your eyes when you throw it so your attacker’s bone fragments don’t blind you! If he’s still alive after that he’ll definitely be stunned, so follow it up by punching his nose bone into his brain with an open palm-heel strike (NOT A CLOSED FIST)!

Tumblr Expert 3: Also if the bad guy has a gun you should do this! *posts several gifs of highly improbable disarm moves that would nevertheless take a shitload of real-life practice with training partners*

Schmuck: holy fuck my ass tumblr teaching us how to wage war

(275,987 notes)

Martial artist/MMA fighter/boxer/gun owner: 

I don’t believe in love, but sometimes if I think there’s a tiny ounce of it that exists - then I don’t believe in forever. I believe that everyone leaves, that nobody stays forever. ‘Love’s created to show you everything you want and has the ability to make you happy, just for it all to disappear at one point.

This should help you understand why I act crazy at times, why I get so frustrated when you make me jealous, maybe why I talk about us like we’re not going to last. I guess this doesn’t really explain why I’m so shit at trying to love you. I guess it’s not much of an excuse as to why I don’t treat you how you deserve to be treated, and give you the love that you want. Although I hope you know how much it took for me to trust you and even let you in in the first place. I hope you know I’m scared. You’re either going to show me that I was right to believe in things that I believe in and my thoughts on love or you’ll prove me wrong, and I don’t know which one scares me more.

—  s.a.m.i
graffiti thoughts

so, there’s a lot of shit going around about banksy right now.

i’m just going to say here that i’m not a graffiti artist. i very much enjoy graffiti but i don’t make graffiti art and these are simply my personal thoughts as an outside perspective.

first of all, i don’t think that tagging and what banksy does are even in the same league. tagging is a specific statement. it takes space, it is a nonviolent way to fight the legality and oppression of the government. it breaks the law in an artistic way where nobody gets hurt. it’s used to claim territory, to immortalize, and to fight against the powers at be. in most cases, its freestyled. it takes hours. the graffiti community is tight knit and exercises a good amount of respect for one another. graffiti is seen by most as a blemish, strange words or names written fantastically on walls that don’t belong to the artist, without permission, and are often covered up by street cleaners because they depreciate business/real estate value.

i do not find banksy as a graffiti artist because he doesn’t do these things. he’s not a radical and he’s not some kind of political revolutionary. he’s not claiming space for the oppressed, he’s just trying to make a buck on a scene he probably thought was cool.

EDIT: this doesn’t mean banksy isnt a street artist. i was simply addressing the misconception that his work is “graffiti”. street artists, like banksy, usually use stencils and make statements about social policies, war, racism, etc. street art is usually more widely accepted as art. however i meant to make it more clear that i disagree with people who specifically think he is a graffiti artist and rereading this post i see i didn’t really have the intended effect due to poor wording.

this would be fine with me, if it wasn’t for the inexcusable tragedy that was the years leading up to King Robbo’s death.

this piece was painted by King Robbo in 1985. It was located under the London Transport Police Headquarters in Camden, London. this place was only accessible by water. when most of Robbo’s other works had been covered up, this one remained. for a while it was the oldest piece in London.

by 2009, the piece had gone the way most tags go, everything is transient and every space is fair game for more people to make their marks. this is the nature of graffiti, and to it King Robbo took no offense.

that year, Banksy painted this. It is a wall painter, removing the piece from the walls. he took the oldest piece of graffiti in london, which was no longer even just King Robbo’s, but an impromptu collaboration between many london graffiti artists, and he disrespected it. if it wasn’t enough that they were getting jailed while banksy was making millions for the same work, he disrespected them. he spit on them. he decided his statement was worth more than the oldest piece of graffiti in london and on top of that, THIS IS A STENCIL. he couldn’t even free-hand it! he decided his LITERAL cookie-cutter street art was more important that Robbo’s only surviving legacy.


EDIT: tumblr user sixtypizzas explained to me that this was supposed to be a wall painter putting up King Robbo’s piece, which is somehow more insulting to me. this is just my opinion and you’re welcome to draw your own conclusions but depicting somebody paste up King Robbo’s most famous work seems to cheapen it.

insulted, King Robbo replied. he was quoted saying  “I was at a place called the Dragon Bar on Old Street. I was introduced to a couple of guys who were like ‘whoa it’s nice to meet you!’. When I was introduced to Banksy, I went 'Oh yeah I’ve heard of you mate, how you doing?’ and he went 'well I’ve never heard of you’…he dismissed me as a nobody, as nothing. So with that I slapped him and went 'oh what you ain’t heard of me? you won’t forget me now will you?’ and with that he picked up his glasses and ran off.” obviously this was an insulting display to King Robbo, who had managed what most graffiti artists can never pull off, he had a timeless piece. he gained some fame, some notoriety. this piece, of all the pieces in london, banksy covered up with a stencil. EVEN SO, Robbo left banksy’s work, whereas banksy deliberately covered his up.

banksy replied. as you can see, very thought provoking. quite profound.

King Robbo corrected the piece.

at this point, an unknown third part covers the wall.

it wasn’t over, as this had become very personal for King Robbo. He painted this work. At this point, many other graffiti artists had already started tagging the streets with “TEAM ROBBO”.  many of banksy’s works were being tagged over, like he did to King Robbo’s, in an effort to send a message. Mainstream media called these “defacement” and “vandalism” of banksy Originals, where the travesty against King Robbo went mostly unnoticed outside london and the graffiti community.

as you can see, Team Robbo exploded, giving many of banksy’s pieces the same respect he gave King Robbo’s long-standing artwork. 

after being blacked out again, banksy painted this piece. the meaning is lost on me, if you know what it means, let me know. it’s strange and confusing.

EDIT: tumblr user inthebellyofaelephant explained the meaning of the piece as thus:  “The meaning about what bansky did with the weird living room mural is he is calling king robbo a fish out of water thus why a fish is jumping out of the bowl. Kinda saying that they are not I’m the same league in a very banksy style.”

this had gone on into 2011, when King Robbo fell into a coma. It was only 5 days before his exhibition, “Team Robbo - The Sellout Tour”. he unfortunately never got to attend his exhibition, and never again woke up. he died in july 2014.

banksy, supposedly making a memorial, made sure he got the last word:

RIP King Robbo.

◆ —— SHAMELESS (US) QUOTES STARTER PROMPTS.

PART. 1 [TRIGGER WARNINGS AHEAD]

  • It’s a brave, new world. 
  • You have no money, yet you’re going to a grocery store. Interesting. 
  • Okay, here’s a lesson; use condoms. 
  • Can you fucking believe that shit? 
  • I didn’t ask to tip $5.
  • I’m HIV positive. 
  • I have bipolar. 
  • You could do things with your tongue that would make a rattlesnake blush. 
  • No mass murder, kids! 
  • She wasn’t taking advantage of me. We’re in love!
  • I want to know why you think I owe you anything. 
  • I just need you to sign some papers so I can buy my house back. 
  • This is bible study. We’re here to praise Jesus, not ask him for favours. 
  • Nobody wants to fuck Mary Poppins. 
  • If you want to stay alive, go to school. 
  • I’m a naturally helpful person. 
  • Fuck that house, and fuck your god damn deadbeat family. 
  • You go anywhere near him/her, I will set you on fucking fire. 
  • I can tell when someone’s being cagey, or being a shit because I spent most of my life being both. 
  • Yo, white girl, I don’t know you. 
  • Oh, so you get to leave late ‘cause you’re fucking the boss? 
  • I’m sick of hearing about your dead girlfriend. 
  • I don’t know how much more of that I can take without stabbing him in the neck with a broken beer bottle. 
  • Happy is overrated. Grow up. 
  • You made me happy. I’ve never been very happy. 
  • Could I possibly be doing a worse job at raising these kids? 
  • I’m finally happy.
  • I love him and that’s the most important thing, to find somebody to love, right? 
  • Why won’t you ever let me be happy? 
  • Does she make you happy or is it just about the sex? 
  • Let’s go get drunk and buy a gun. 
  • There’s always gonna be people that are going to try and fix us, and you can never make those people happy. 
  • I have a home. I’m just not welcome there. 
  • I’m not gonna be alive to pay off my credit card, what does it matter? 
  • It’s a shame when someone you love gets taken away, isn’t it? 
  • I got nowhere else to go.
  • When you focus on other people’s problems, it’s a lot easier to ignore your own. 
  • Stop behaving like the world is out to get you when it is so clearly dropping gifts at your feet. 
  • Keep doing what you’re doing and you’ll end up in a cell somewhere, angry and out of options. 
  • You ever streak before? 
  • You think you scare me? Bring it, bitch. 
  • It’s a tragedy when a young man ends up behind prison bars. 
  • Your kid did not get arrested because of me. 
  • Pack your shit and get out. 
  • I’m sorry I’m late. 
  • Fight for this marriage or cut him/her lose. 
  • If this is a relationship you wanna save, then you gotta fucking save it. 
  • Silence in our house usually means someone stopped breathing. 
  • What’s it feel like to be crazy? 
  • You deserve better than him/her. 
  • You owe me. You’re my slave now. 
  • If you don’t get out right now, I will shoot you. 
  • I slept with my ex. 
  • Do you love him? 
  • You don’t get to ask me that. 
  • I’m starting to get fucking homicidal. Call me the fuck back. 
  • I’m worried about you. I love you. 
  • What the fuck is he doing here? 
  • I thought you were married? 
  • Hey, I need to borrow your car. My brother just stole a baby. 
  • What was I supposed to do? Was I supposed to sit on my porch knitting, hoping one day you’d shown back up? 
  • You disappeared. Gone. Nothing. 
  • I did a porno. 
  • Nothing says 'no regrets’ like hiding it from those you love. 
  • Did I mention that I’m falling in love with you? 
  • I don’t give a shit. I’ll go on date night by myself. 
  • You’re a good person. 
  • You’re needy. And annoying. And slutty. 
  • I love chaos. And when I get into chaos, bad shit follows. 
  • You’re a chaos junkie. 
  • You’re too young and pretty to be so cycnical and hard. It makes me feel sad for you. 
  • After extensive research and weeks of testing, I have determined my liver can support one beer a day.
  • Nobody’s gonna roll me. I carry pepper spray and a shiv. 
  • Nobody gives a shit who you bang. 
  • We’re taking care of him here. You. Me, us. His fucking family. 
  • Look, I’m just trying to put everything in the past, okay? 
  • Wanna torture your parents? Bring them to my house for dinner tonight. 
  • Don’t ever say I’m not a man of my word again. 
  • I don’t have an interest in being a mistress anymore. 
  • I just wanna say that I love you and that I forgive you for everything.. unless you live, then I’m still pissed off. 
  • I just don’t know who I am anymore. 
  • Are you robbing me with my own fucking gun? 
  • Why do you guys care so much about sex? 
  • Give me another chance. I promise not to screw your brother or commit a felony. 
  • How can you tell when you’re in love with someone? 
  • You are the worst fuckin’ pimp I’ve ever seen. 
  • I try to make it a point of not banging my roommates girlfriend/boyfriend. 
  • I hate myself for a number of reasons right now. 
  • I’m done living the way other people want me to live. 
  • I’m not the one who left the cocaine out. 
  • Get the fuck outta my house! 
  • Yes, it’s about me! Because it’s never about me and I’m finally making it about me. 
  • Are you retarded now? I hope you’re sleeping and not in a retarded haze. 
  • The social worker can bite my ballbag. 
  • We are victims of a society that squeezes the lower middle class. Screws up our businesses because of jackhammers and taxes, and regulations. And unnecessary paperwork. Basically forces us to do illegal shit. 
  • I’m having four kids and if that means I gotta turn out some Russian whores to feed my family and pursue the American Dream, that’s how it’s gotta be. 
  • I’d be crying if I wasn’t so high. 
  • I wish I could just skip the part where I don’t know the right thing to do and get to the part where I do. 
  • What do you want me to say? That I’m self-destructive? That liars, and thieves, and addicts turn me on? 
  • We are nothing alike. 
  • My wife’s a hooker, not a slave. 
  • Random destruction makes you think of me? 
  • We’re all addicts trying to fill a void. Some of us are just better at hiding it, right? 
  • Ask him if he’s DTF.
  • I haven’t abused marijuana like the rest of you, so yes, I remember. 
  • He’ll be back. He’s like a cockroach. You can stamp on him, spray him, try and drown him, but he’ll always come crawling back up out of the toilet bowl. 
  • I got a fuck Jay Cutler t-shirt, but it might have some blood on it. 
Avengers Chatroom: Liar Among Us
  • Rhodes has created a chatroom.
  • Rhodes has invited Y/N, Sam, Bucky, Nat, Clint, Tony, Steve, Wanda, Vision.
  • Rhodes: I have an announcement to make.
  • Clint: Is everything okay?
  • Rhodes: Yes. I would just like to inform you that there is a liar among us.
  • Wanda: What? Who?
  • Y/N: Explain pls
  • Rhodes: This person has lied about who they are.
  • Tony: I have done checks on everyone though, went through their background, everything. nobody is a double agent.
  • Y/N: wait what tony u did what
  • Steve: Of course he did.
  • Clint: Even our search histories...?
  • Tony: Even that.
  • Nat: I would like to know what you found after this.
  • Tony: Some of you look up really weird shit.
  • Rhodes: Do tell...
  • Steve: That's enough.
  • Bucky: What did you look up stevie
  • Y/N: Wait who's the liar
  • Rhodes: Oh right.
  • Sam: you guys get distracted easily
  • Rhodes: This person...
  • Y/N: yes...?
  • Rhodes: Is tony
  • Clint: wut
  • Vision: Father?
  • Tony: I am not a liar. I am Tony Stark. Buddy, what are you going on about?
  • Rhodes: His real name is
  • Tony: Oh
  • Tony: I know what you're doing!
  • Y/N: Is...?
  • Rhodes: it is...
  • Tony: YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH
  • Rhodes: TONY STANK
  • Y/N: SCANDALOUS
  • Steve: Should rename Stark Industries to STANK INDUSTRIES.
  • Sam: dude no
  • Y/N: He's learning. Nice try Steve.
  • Tony: YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T TELL
  • Nat: How did this come to be?
  • Tony: NOT ANOTHER WORD
  • Clint has changed Tony's name to Mr Stank.
  • Wanda: Since nobody is an actual double agent,I have to go.
  • Wanda has left the chat.
  • Rhodes: Tony received a package. Probably deodorant. It was for "Mr Stank"
  • Mr Stank: I hate you all.
  • Y/N: vision help me change all the articles online with his name to mr stank
  • Vision: Of course.
  • Y/N has left the chat.
  • Vision has left the chat.
  • Steve: It must get really sweaty in that suit, Mr Stank.
  • Mr Stank: Ugh.
  • Mr Stank has left the chat.
  • Bucky: I forgot I'm out off plums. gtg
  • Bucky has left the chat.
  • Rhodes: I should probably go check on tony
  • Rhodes has left the chat.
  • Steve: Nat, Sam, wanna go for some pizza?
  • Sam: YES! The golden trio is back.
  • Nat: Sure, I have no missions today.
  • Clint: You're forgetting someone...
  • Y/N has joined the chat.
  • Y/N: I sensed pizza.
  • Steve: Sorry Clint! Thought you left, you're invited as well. Y/N would you like to join us for pizza?
  • Y/N: YES.
  • Nat: Let's go, I'm hungry.
  • Sam has left the chat.
  • Steve has left the chat.
  • Y/N has left the chat.
  • Clint has left the chat.
  • Nat has left the chat.
  • Bucky has joined the chat.
  • Bucky: The store was closed, what did i miss
  • Bucky: Oh.
  • Bucky has left the chat.

One thing I’m hating seeing on social media is people patting black women on the back for being mules regarding this election. I hate it with the deepest hate I can conjure up. I hate that black women think that’s some badge of honor.

Because these people have been silent when black women have continuously been mistreated in this country, in our community and globally. I just sat and watched over the years black women be subjected to brutal mistreatment and nobody not give a damn.

Lets not act like black women aren’t constantly told to shut up or be completely ignore when we want to fight for our own rights by the same people telling us how great we are for carrying the burden of other people’s liberation.

Fuck outta here with that. Stop only caring about black women if we fight for other people, I hate that shit. I’ll join this shit once I see people do the same for black women. Until then I will not make myself apart of this shit, I’ll hate Trump’s stupid ass from a distance.

3

gif sources: [x] [x] [x]
not requested: This drabble is based off of the song Single - The Neighbourhood, only pieces of the song are used. I would recommend listening to it, honestly the first time I heard it all I could think of was making out with Peter Maximoff. Sorry it’s a bit of a mess but I’d really appreciate it if you left me some feedback!


Longing

Peter Maximoff x Reader

I don’t know if we should be alone together
I still got a crush, that’s obvious
If nobody’s around, what’s stopping us?
Everywhere I go you show, whatever
I don’t ever mind sharing oxygen
I just wanna get lost in your lungs

Being left in a room together was gruelling, especially when you looked like that with your flamboyant smile, contagious laugh, soft curves, mesmerising looks and ethereal presence.

You looked up at Peter with your bottom lip between your teeth and teasing look in your eye that broke Peter’s restraint. Not a second later did he have you no longer sitting on the love-seat located in the library, but on his lap.

“Peter no, we could get caught,” you search the room with frantic eyes look for the presence of anyone.

“Nobody’s here baby girl, it just us. There’s nothing stopping us.” He moves his face closer with each word spoken, eyes completely focused on your plump lips until his own brush against them. He watches as your eyelids flutter shut at the sensation, still not used to the way your body reacts to even the briefest of his touches.

The thing about your relationship was that it’s a secret and with a telepath for friend that was exceptionally hard, but the two of you managed. So that resulted in lots of sneaking around, stolen kisses and effective use of Peter’s speed. The pair of you didn’t particularly want to hide your relationship but found it necessary as you were unsure how your friends would react to the large age gap.

Reasoning evaded your mind with the sensation of his lips against yours. You melted into the kiss, lips moulding together softly, relishing in the way your kisses felt like a breath of fresh air and the way his scent invaded your senses, intoxicating you and the way his kiss leaves your heart rate spiked and a shiver of delight rolling down your back. You’re still perched on his lap, one hand snaking up his neck, threading your fingers through the silky hair at the base of his neck, pulling him closer to you and the other resting on his chest over his heart. The two of you continued to get lost in one another, re-discovering and tracing parts of each other you were already so familiar with. Peter’s hands reposition from your hips to cup your face, deepening the kiss leaving you spiralling into pit of desperate passion.

Peter’s tongue nudged your lower lip as you parted them, allowing his tongue to prod your mouth, exploring it and relishing in the way you unintentionally grind down on him as he does so, electing a low moan from his pink lips and a gasp from yours.

Fuck did this boy know how to kiss.

From that point the kiss became feverish, fuelled by passion, lust and raw hunger for one another. There was no other way to describe it other than intense and hot.

You both pulled away due to oxygen deprivation, but within seconds Peter was trailing kisses along your jaw, down your neck and across your collarbone before coming back up your neck and nipping on the sensitive skin there.

Peter can’t help but look up at you from his place on your neck and feel utter adoration for the girl on his lap. He continues to plant small hickies on your neck, ones he know will be a bitch to cover in the morning however he can’t help but wish people were aware of your relationship.

He knows that if things continue the way they are with the teasing gestures of batting your eye lashes, biting your lip and his lingering stares it won’t remain a secret much longer as you’re driving him crazy. Yes you tease him from time to time, but half the time what you do to drive him crazy is unintentional on your part. He can’t help but stare at you as you enter the room because, as clichè as it is, you light whatever room you walk into up. He hangs on your every word loving the way your lips move as you pronounce each word, he is hypnotised by your little quirks that add to your beauty. He longs for your relationship to be public, not caring what others will think as he’s not sure how much longer he can see you laughing at Scott’s lame attempts at jokes, knowing it could be him making you cry with laughter, watching as your eyes light up and you attempt to muffle your laughter and grin by covering your mouth. You constantly have his attention, and he wants every one to know you’re his.

I don’t think that we should be around each other
When you’re in the room, you get my eyes
You open your mouth, I’m hypnotized
I can make you laugh until you cry
You know you got all my attention
You know you got all mine

Imagine if Negan could break the fourth wall. How awesome would that be? Just picture him in 7x01:
Rick: I’m going to kill you
Negan: I’m sorry Prick, but the producers wouldn’t allow that. They know I’m the main reason people watch this show
Or in 7x04:
Negan: *as he’s about to leave Alexandria* After this episode people are going to start shipping us, Prick! Can you fucking believe it?
And everybody would be like wtf but nobody would make a comment on it because, c'mon, he’s Negan, and he says some weird shit all the time