So I tried this last night cos crisis and it worked so well. I’m someone who wakes a lot during the night and when I’m idle at night…bad thoughts happen. So before I go to bed, I write a list of things I can do if I wake up, so last night it was “1. Animal Crossing, 2. Napstablook drawing, 3. Read Mackie, 4. Read Magicians, 5. Listen to night vale, 6. Prep for class tomorrow.” Which was good cos it gave me a range of options, and I ended up playing animal crossing for two hours and falling asleep again. Having clearly defined suggestions really helped, since usually I end up lying there doing nothing and feeling shit. So. Yeah. Idea.
but imagine surgeon!mikey who was so passionate about saving lives. he’d spend all day at the hospital, coming home at ungodly hours of the night only to return to work a few hours later. while you were irritated you never got to spend time with your husband, you were mostly concerned for the life growing inside you. would michael even have time to help you care for this child? he’s rarely ever home now and you knew you couldn’t handle an infant on your own. later that night you’d share your fears with him and his heart would ache at what you said and he’d promise to take the day off tomorrow claiming he needed to spend time with you. but you’d wake up to an empty bed, with a note stating he’d only be gone for 3 hours max. however 3 hours passed.. and another 3 would pass and he still wasn’t home. around 4am when michael walked through the front door he’d plop down next to you on the couch and start mumbling about his stressful day and you’d scoff completely annoyed and mikey would pick his head up out of his hands and say, “babe i took a vow t-”, but before he could finish you’d interrupt “i know okay? i know you took a vow to save lives, michael and i get that you have an important job, i really do. but you’re not the only one stressing around here,” michael looked terrified as you continued, “i thought i knew what i was getting myself into when i agreed to marry you, i was wrong. i cant - i just cant do this anymore.” and he’d start pacing, his voice cracking as he spoke “what about the vows you took, huh? for better or for worse… til death do us part? you don’t - you cant give up on our marriage, on me. thats not fucking fair!” “want to know whats not fair? the fact you’re never fucking here,” you seethed, “its unfair that i’m going through this pregnancy alone because you don’t fucking care!” tentatively michael walk over to you before engulfing you in a hug, “i’m so sorry baby, i’m sorry i’m always at work and i’m sorry i made you think i don’t care. i care so fucking much, thats why i’m always working so we’ll have money once our baby gets here and i won’t have to work constantly and fuck i am so sorry baby please don’t leave”