Welcome to speedy, electric hell
Incidentally, I have to fail to apologise about the fact I’m really into Formula E and I just hope Lynn and Evans can drag some of you fuckers into this thing with me after you all broke me with GP2.
USEFUL FORMULA E FACTS:
- Super quiet but high pitched, so pronounced Formula EEEEEEEE
- Everybody there is very upset, VERY UPSET
- Apart from Nico Prost and he’s probably upset now because Bruno Senna is out
- The cars are very shiny. Very, very, very shiny. So shiny.
- And the new wings make them look like whale sharks so that’s an interesting variation
- SEASON 3! It’s season 3! We’re gonna have more fun and be less weird than the first two years combined! We’re gonna be less crazy! We’re gonna finally be - nevermind, it’s motorsport.
- Things happen like Buemi and Di Grassi being on joint points for the final race, crashing each other the fuck out and then spending the entire rest of the race diving into the pits to recharge to try and get the fastest lap point and thus win
- If you go to a race you can get properly close to the track also everyone has a lot of fun and can I just reinforce fuck you, Battersea for ejecting the double-header from London because that was A+++
- Everyone is basically a bit sad not to be an F1 driver, but also super excited to be a FE driver and it’s eligible for super license points so hopefully this will make it less of a retirement option
- Holy crap they are very fast when they’re on the go and the tracks are SO TIGHT - the cars are slightly smaller than in F1 but not THAT much and like wowsers
- Multiple pile ups occur on the regular and everyone’s pretty chummy about it
- Apart from the Buemi/Di Grassi beef which is hella
- Simona does not have a ride anymore :((( I cry
- OH. Oh. My favourite stupid feature of Formula E is there’s this thing called #Fanboost where they can basically get …ok let’s call it the equivalent of DRS if enough people tweet about them. It’s star power, basically. It’s such a ridic feature I really love it.
- It’d be shit in F1 cus Verstappen’d just get it all the time BUT FORTUNATELY FE IS NOT F1
- Everyone is Kvyat and we must protect and nurture them all
- Even the teams tbh - oh yeah, there’s two new ones this year, Jaguar and Techeetah; JEV is in Techeetah and either Mitch or Alex or both is extremely likely for Jaguar so get yer faves here, etc.
- I was gonna list all the other ones that are cute babes and then realised it was all of them
- Simona :((((( my broken heart
- Anyway, come and watch Formula E with me guys it’s absolutely horrific
- I LOVE IT