shi shi shi

Painted a hurt Fenris and Hawke sneaked in there to kiss him better - went from pure angst to 100% fluff, I do not regret.

When making your brother an ARMY backfires …

Me: Mom, after the divorce, when you leave Dad, you don’t plan on staying single forever, do you?

Mom: I’ve never thought about it, why?

Me: Well, there’s this guy. A Korean guy.

Mom: A Korean guy?

Me: Yeah, can I set you up with him?

Mom: Uh, how on Earth did you get in contact with a Korean man? We live in South-Asia.

Me: I have my ways.

Mom: I need details.

Me: Well, he’s 45 years old, you’re 40. It could work out.

Mom: Name?

Me: Bang Shi Hyuk.

Mom: Anything else? Has he been married before?

Me: Nope. He has seven sons, though.

Mom: S-SEVEN SONS? HOW DID HE END UP WITH SO MANY? THATS LIKE A WOLF PACK!

Me: No, they’re all older than me. And very well-behaved, too. Like they’ll take care of you. Not the other way around.

My brother *walking into the room*: One of them wrote a song with the lyrics, ‘I’m a master, baby, with your bra.’

Mom: WHAT? THAT’S HORRIBLE!

My brother: And if you think they’re brothers, it’s anything but that. Incest left and right.

Mom: What kind of nonsense-

My brother: Oh and one wants to be Sex Porn Star.

Me *shoving hand over my asshole of a brother’s mouth* It’s not like that. They’re really nice. They do their homework-

My brother: Their youngest failed his English exam.

Me: They’re modest-

My brother: Their computers get invested with viruses because they watch too much porn.

Me: They go to bed on time-

My brother: Two of them play videogames until five in the morning.

Me: They’re down to earth.

My brother: Their eldest thinks he’s worldwide handsome and once said his own mother cried when he was born because she could never be as beautiful as him.

Me: They’ll help you with the house chores-

My brother: One of them said he wants to be a rock in his next life so he could sleep and not do work.

Me: They’re very quiet and not noisy like-

My brother: They scream on the top of their lungs when they’re excited no matter what the setting.

Me: They’re super smart-

My brother: Once, during this interview, they were asked what their favourite American food was and one of them said Sprite. No joke.

Me: They dress well-

My brother: Did I mention this really short one stripped down at an award show to flash his abs?

Me: Mom, don’t listen to him! You’ll inherit a company-

My brother *snorting*: Yeah, a company that doesn’t equally distribute lines.

Mom: Get out of my room.

Mom: Get out of my room, right now.

BTS as the ‘Suite life of Zack and Cody’ characters

Seokjin as Carey

  • the mom friend
  • needs a break because children drive him insane
  • single parent because other half (namjoon) is a successful musician
  • amazing singer
  • not appreciated for it
  • gives great advice
  • really patient god bless

Yoongi as Mr. Moseby

  • Leave me alone
  • Don’t destroy my hotel (studio)
  • I hate kids (actually reall fond of them
  • idgaf game is strong
  • very hard working 
  • dedicated
  • acts like he don’t care
  • he care
  • he care very much
  • needs esteban (hoseok)
  • sassy af

Hoseok as Esteban

  • Happy machine
  • Very helpful
  • innocent
  • the mood maker
  • good looking 
  • very supporter
  • loves mr moseby aka yoongi v v much
  • a literal kid
  • don’t even think about angering him
  • loyal af

Namjoon as Maddie

  • wants to be president
  • who cares they are president
  • they’re the reason the A grade was created
  • they invented IQ
  • follow rules religiously
  • can act super duper childish at times
  • hella hella smart
  • watch out they will fite u
  • but you can’t take them seriously because smol bean

Jimin as Cody

  • cutie patootie
  • always tryna avoid danger
  • protect them
  • a very good friend
  • just a good human being in general
  • but is secretly very mischievious 
  • and they like to have their own fun
  • super duper talented

Taehyung as London

  • does not give two shits
  • literally do whatever the fuck they want
  • life is a party
  • treats pet like they’re gold
  • hella weird but hella fun
  • aka blank tae
  • but they’re super considerate deep inside
  • actually a softie
  • very good at hiding pain
  • a rare but worthy friend

Jungkook as Zack

  • Hands down everyone is at the edge of their toes because of this kid
  • drives people nuts
  • talks people into doing what they want
  • adventurous
  • loves gaming
  • breaking the rules
  • rebel
  • acts like a 2 year old
  • can be very responsible when the time comes
  • can also act maturely 
  • will fite you if you treat someone they love unfairly

Bang PD as Mr. Tipton

  • Where is he
  • who is he
  • what is he
  • everyone’s favourite somehow
  • actually the reason why shit is happening
  • can be a lil insensitive sometimes (TREAT SEOKJIN RIGHT DAMMIT)
  • but its all cool bruh