sherlock says all my feels right now

Aquaphobia

Inspired by this: ask for fics where Sherlock has aquaphobia


Deep waters, Sherlock, all your life …



It’s summer, and it’s unbearably hot.

Sherlock is only wearing his swimming trunks, while he crouches in the dried up grass and carefully takes a little brown frog in his hand.

Redbeard sits beside him, panting loudly.

Sherlock curiously holds the hand with the frog in it before his face. He laughs, when the frog walks a bit on his hand and it feels lightly slimy.
He looks at Redbeard.
“Come on Redbeard, we must bring him to the pond! This is no grass frog, it’s a sea frog. He can’t stay in this heat.”

Sherlock carefully closes his hand around the little frog and runs to the nearby pond. Redbeard follows him with a happy bark.

The pond has lost water because of the heat, but it’s still big and deep.

Sherlock slowly walks a bit into the water. Until it reaches his knees. It’s wonderfully cool and he giggles when Redbeard runs wildly into the pond and spatters him with water.

Sherlock puts the frog in the water, and watches how it swims away quickly.
“Bye, froggy,” he murmurs and smiles.
And then he hears it.
Voices. Coming nearer.
He frowns and swallows, when he sees a group of young boys walking to the pond. Their attention is on a gameboy one of them holds in his hands. They are laughing and shoving each other around.

Sherlock knows them.
They are two classes above him and they aren’t very fond of him.
Sometimes, they steal his lunch or his books from the library. And when the mood strikes them, they shove Sherlock around between them for a while.

Sherlock hopes they aren’t going to notice him.

Suddenly, Redbeard barks loudly, but friendlily and the boys look up.

The one at the front, big for his age and with tangled, sweaty, blond hair, Tom White, sees Sherlock and smiles spitefully.
“Look what we have here,” he says loudly, and the other boys look up from the gameboy. “The little freak is in the water. What are you doing in there, weirdo? Are you looking for your relatives?”
The other boys laugh, altough Sherlock doesn’t find the statement very funny or smart.

“Leave me alone,” Sherlock says and points at Redbeard. “I have my dog with me!”

A few of the boys swallow nervously when they see the big Irish Setter in the water, but Tom just laughs amused. “Your dog is like a big sheep, weirdo. Look. Come here, doggie, come here!” He whistles and Redbeard points his ears. In the next moment he jumps out of the water with his tale wagging. He runs to the boys and they laugh loudly.

Sherlock feels a lump in his throat.
It’s true, Redbeard isn’t a very good dog for protection.
He hopes that the boys won’t have enough energy to deal with him further.
But he hopes in vain.

Tom pats Redbeard between his earth and grins snidely. “Yeah, look at your dumb dog. I bet he would lick my hand even if I slapped him!”

Sherlock feels anger rising up in him. He balls his hands to fists. “Leave my dog alone,” he says. “Or I … I’ll tell your mother about the stealing!”

Tom looks at him sharply, and his look darkens. “What do you mean, weirdo?”

“I know that you steal money from her. For your cigarettes and …”

He doesn’t get any further. Suddenly Tom walks to him very quickly, with his hands balled into fists.
Sherlock moves back, suddenly he’s scared. He moves back until the water is nearly up to his belly button.

“You aren’t going to tell her anything, freak!” Tom yells at him and grabs him by the shoulders. “Or I’m going to be very unpleasent!”

The other boys come nearer too, they grin.
“Teach him a lesson, Tom!” One of them says and laughs. 

“Yeah, I should do that,” Tom says and grins. “Hold his dog,” he advises the boys, and then he grabs a handful of Sherlock’s curls. Before Sherlock can do or say anything, Tom shoves his head under water violently.

Cold. It’s so cold.
And dark. Sherlock can’t see anything. He can hear a loud swoosh and laughing somewhere in the distance.
He holds his breath, and feels how fear rises up in him.
He struggles against the hands which hold him down, but he’s not strong enough.
He starts to feel uncomfortable, a pain begins in his chest.
And then, he panics.
His lungs begin to burn, as his body begins to scream for air in earnest.
He can’t … He needs to breathe, he needs to breathe, he needs to …
Sherlock feels like his lungs would burst the next second, he screams under water, he …

And then he is pulled up.

Suddenly, there’s air around him again.
He gasps for breath, and everything is burning inside him. Everything …

He is dragged onto the grass and falls into it.
Hyperventialting.

Faint voices are around him, Redbeard is barking.

“Uhm, don’t you think you have overdone it a bit Tom?”
“Oh shut up, the little weirdo deserves it, Sam!”
“Yeah, but …”
“Shut up, I said! Let’s go.”

Suddenly, Tom’s shadow is above Sherlock, and the older boy whispers into his ear: “You are not going to tell this to anyone, you understand? If you tell anyone about this, I’m going to kill your stupid dog. My father buys rat poison every month, I could just give your dog a nice sausage with the poison in it …”

“No,” Sherlock gasps breathlessly. Tears flow over his face. “No …”

“Do what I say. I’m warning you, weirdo.”
And then Tom is gone.
They’re all gone.

Sherlock lays in the grass and gasps for breath. Crying, trembling, still full of panic.

Redbeard suddenly licks his face and whines quietly.

Sherlock stares at the blue, cloudless sky above him and cries.

Since then, he could never go into the water again.

*

Aquaphobia, is the term for it, he learns when he tries to find out why he suddenly can’t bear being in deep water.
Caused by a traumatic experience.

And from now on Sherlock stays out of the swimming pool. Out of ponds and rivers.

Because every time he thinks about going into the water, he remembers.
Remembers the panic, the cold and the dark.
His struggle. The pain in his lungs.
The feel of dying in darkness.

And he can’t. He simply can’t.

*

John is in the well, and it fills with water quickly.

John is in the well full of rising water, Sherlock stands above and nearly hyperventilates.

“John,” he stutters, “Oh God, John.”

“Sherlock!” John calls out of the well, the water has already reached his shoulders. “Sherlock, is someone coming?!”

“Yes,” Sherlock says and swallows. “Yes, yes … I called for help and … “

“Okay, all right,” John says, and obviously tries to stay calm. “Everything is going to be all right, Sherlock.”

This makes Sherlock flinch, and he shakes his head in disbelief. “How can you say that? You are the one in the well!”

“Yeah,” John says and laughs warily. “I’m the one in the well. Oh Fuck, it’s so fucking cold. I can’t feel my legs!”

Cold …
So cold …

Sherlock closes his eyes. Memories climb up in him, grab for him …
NO! He shouts at himself. Not now, John needs help, my help, John …

“Help will be here soon, John,” he says, and hopes he’s right.

The water is now at John’s neck, and Sherlock can see how John stretches his body, to stay on the surface.

Oh God …

“Sherlock,” John coughs, “If this … If this isn’t going to end well, I want you to know something!”

“Shut up, John,” Sherlock says, and feels how he is slowly getting desperate. There are still no sirens to hear in the distance … “Everything will be all right!”

“I hope so, I really hope so, but …” And then, John’s mouth is suddenly full of water and he coughs violently.

“JOHN!” Sherlock screams, and he sees, how the water still rises, how John’s struggle weakens …

I need to do something!
I need to …
Jump into the water.
Hold John over water.

Oh God.

Sherlock stares into the dark water. Dark. Cold. Memories …
His lungs burning.
The feeling of drowning …
Pain.

Then he looks at John, who gasps for air desperately.

Into the water …

There are no boys who are going to push you under.
There’s just John.
John who is drowning.
John, who needs your help.

John.

And just when he can hear the faint sound of a siren, Sherlock jumps into the well.

Then the water surrounds him and it’s so cold, that he gasps out of shock.

He pushes the feel of panic, the urge to get out, aside and moves to John, who seems to be close to passing out.
He grabs John under his arms and lifts him, as high as the chains let him.
Then, he paddles on the spot and holds John’s face above water.

John opens his eyes and looks at him weakly.

“You idiot,” he mumbles and smiles faintly. “What are you doing here? Do you want to drown with me?”

“No one of us is going to drown,” Sherlock says grimly. “Help is coming and everything is going to be all right, John.”

“Sherlock,” John whispers and sighs. Then he really passes out.
Sherlock can feel how his body goes slack in his grip.
He swallows when he noticeshow the water rises again.
How long, until …

And then, a bright light suddenly shines into his eyes from above.

“Sherlock!” Lestrade’s voice. Worried. “Sherlock, John, can you hear me?”

“Here!” Sherlock yells. “Get us out of this bloody well already!”

And then, someone comes to them with a rope and pliers.

While Sherlock still holds John’s limp body in his arms, they cut the chains, and finally, they are pulled out of the cold water.

*

Later, when they sit on a stretcher together, side by side, wrapped in blankets, Sherlock says quietly to John, “Did you know, that I have suffered from a case of aquaphobia since I was a child?”
“No, no I didn’t. Oh wow, Sherlock …”
“Yeah. Thanks for curing it, Doctor.”

And they laugh together.



Corrected by @bakerstreet-irregular <3

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Keep reading

Truth Or Dare (An Adlock Fanfiction)

(Prompted by the lovely @i-am-benedict-cumberbatched who trusted me enough with such amazing ideas. I know you said fluffy but… hahaha. Hope you like this, dear. xx)

With the howling wind and the pouring rain fogging up the windows, what was supposed to be a quick visit inevitably extended deep into the night. Everything turned quiet, the sound of the flickering flame the only one to be heard, and Sherlock could feel himself slipping unable to handle the calling from within the halls of his mind palace. 

There were whispers contrasting the jeering voices, varying from Mycroft to John to Mary, all of which were telling in him degrees that being alone with The Woman in such an ambiance spelt nothing but trouble. 

But he didn’t need any reminding. 

She sat across him, occupying John’s chair in her usual elegant gait, her hair hanging loosely on her shoulders, body robed in her favourite dressing gown of his. Arriving fresh from the tropics led her skin to be warmer in colour than usual, her cheeks flushed naturally, and lips unrouged. He was careful to steal glances of her to avoid any conversation that could lead elsewhere, glad that she was occupied with the book she was reading. 

Or that was until she looked up at him and caught his eye did he regret he was glimpsing. 

“Something on my face, Sherlock?” she asked with a smirk, knowing exactly that she caught him in a vulnerable position. 

He shifted, trying to look nonchalant. “I wasn’t looking at you.”

“That’s not my question.” Irene quipped, still smiling. 

“I’d rather you go back to what you’re reading.” Sherlock commented, eyeing the book. 

Irene put the book to a close and tucked it at her side, relaxing her back at chair with her eyes not leaving the detective. “Why do you always have to lie to me?”

“I’m not.” he replied curtly. 

She looked at him intriguingly, a glint visible in her stormy eyes. And finally, for what felt like an eternity, she spoke again. 

“Prove it.”

Sherlock raised his eyebrows in curiosity, unable to decipher anything from Irene’s knowing expression. Not that this was something new. 

“I… I don’t understand.” Sherlock admitted. 

“Let’s play a game.” Irene offered. 

He considered her for a moment, but she gave nothing else away, leaving him to sigh. “Isn’t that always the case with you?”

“A little too late for honesty, darling. It’s just a game.” Irene replied haughtily. 

Sherlock surrendered into his chair, giving her a resigned shrug. “Of what?”

“Truth or dare.” she said. 

“Are we nine-year olds in a sleepover? Should I expect a pillow fight before midnight?” he retorted, only to be surprised with her mischievous expression. 

“Oh, I’m sure you’re expecting much more. But let’s try to keep it innocent if we can.” she replied smugly, causing him to feel heat rise up to his neck. 

Clearing his throat, he gave her a nod. “Well? Seeing that we have nothing else to do…Truth.”

“All right. What are you thinking of right now?” Irene asked, eyes boring deep into his. 

He figured that the essence of the game was to say the thing that was at the top of his head. “That having you here, especially in this time and with this weather, makes me extremely… pleased.”

Irene’s eyes slightly widened at his response, making her shift in her seat. It made him feel slightly triumphant, yet internally bashful all the same. 

“My turn. Dare.” Irene said, trying to look unwavered. 

Sherlock scanned her, eyes landing on the tips of her hair, still slightly damping the fabric of the dressing gown just above her breasts. He felt his fingers clench against the armrest of his chair. 

“Put your hair behind you.” he mused, voice slightly cracking. 

Irene was struck for a moment, unconvinced that Sherlock was getting the point of the game, but upon realising what it was about, a smirk grew across her face. 

“Feeling the heat too soon, Mr Holmes?” she commented as she did what she was told. 

He ignored her. “Dare.”

Irene’s smile grew wider. “Are you sure?”

“Well?”

“Show me something you haven’t shown anyone before.” she said. 

Sherlock hesitated for a minute, considering if he could veto the rules of the game. But then again, this was Irene Adler – the very person who made him decide to let go of the his own inhibitions and go against his personal limits; having to cheat his way into a silly game seemed pathetic. 

With everything he had shared with her, he figured that this was a minor thing to even begin with. Walking over to the dusty table with files and stacks of books on its surface, he reached for a small filer box and opened the first drawer. He gestured for Irene to come see the contents for herself, averting to meet her eyes as she approached him. 

“What is…” A pause. “Oh.” he heard her say, his heart suddenly much more alive in his chest than a few seconds past. She was looking at the contents intently, and he couldn’t blame her as it was an exposure of such sentimentality that he aimed to hide against all odds;  it wasn’t just the Vertu that was there –plane tickets, the flimsy blue candle that was in the cupcake they shared for one of his birthdays, the rings they had worn when they pretended to be a married couple once in Venice – it was everything that led back to her, crammed in the small box that expanded into the depths of his mind palace. 

“Truth.” she murmured just that and nothing more as she stood next to him, eyes still on the box. 

Looking out the window and watching the trickling rain misting the glass of the windows, he asked, “What are you thinking of, right now?”

He felt her look up at him, her voice soft. “Can you really not tell?”

Sherlock turned to face her. “As I’ve said many times before, you’re not the easiest person to read.”

“In all honesty, I’m overwhelmed. You never fail to surprise me.” she admitted, voice quieter than usual.

It was then that he wanted to touch her, right at that moment, with the heat from the fireplace leaving him and the coldness of the night tingling every fibre of his being. He wanted to feel the warmth of her skin, and cup her glowing cheeks with his fingers, but he figured the game is still not over. 

“Truth.” he stated, voice barely a whisper. 

He figured that the look in her eyes mirrored the hunger in his, her lips quivering as her mind reeled for the most fitting question to ask. 

“What am I exactly to you, Sherlock Holmes?” it sounded more like a challenge than a question, an air of ownership and pride all rolled into a simple sentence. She knew exactly what she was asking him, and it was evident that she had an answer in mind, but Sherlock still read a hint of uncertainty and yearning as his name escaped her lips. And it was simple enough to understand that she, too, was also eager for an answer, once and for all. 

He looked at her, really looked at her, racking his mind for a sensible answer. People have told him he had a way with words, that he was blunt when needed and profound all the same, but with her – The Woman – it was never just words, or actions, or… or feelings. 

“I see you, feel you, hear you, taste you, and think of you even if I try to dismiss it with every chance I get. You distract me, yet I crave for you. I want to unravel your mind piece by piece to get the challenge and mystery over with, but I also want to explore you – all of you – for the rest of my life. You claimed me when I opted to be unclaimable, and yet still make me be as I am. You drive me ridiculously insane.” he  was breathless, feeling that every word was still lacking and inappropriate. “You are everything… everywhere.”

He didn’t need to look into the mirror to know that the blackness in his eyes might have swallowed the blue completely, for every part of him was drinking in her image in its entirety. Her eyes held promise upon hearing his every word, and he was afraid that he bore too much of his heart in one night.

Still, she whispered, “Ask me. Truth.”

Sherlock’s brows furrowed. “I ask you the same.”

To his surprise, Irene gave a soft smile. “Oh, forgive me for the lack of fancy words, but to put it simply, you are both my reckoning and my refuge, Sherlock Holmes.”

Sherlock breathed upon hearing her answer, closing in the gap between them, eyes falling hazily into Irene Adler’s similarly drunken expression. He could feel that their thoughts were in harmony at that moment, satisfied at what they had accomplished with what started out as a taunting game. 

“I think one last dare deems necessary.” Sherlock murmured as he let his fingers skim down her shoulders.

Irene reached up to softly trace her fingers to his cheek, trailing down to his flushed lips. “Well, then… I dare you to kiss me.”

Today I’m wondering about how John reacted to the ILY scene… Who has head canons about that that they’d like to share? Last night I had fun talking through the ILY scene with a friend who interprets it totally differently. She thinks Sherlock just loves Molly platonically, and I see him loving her romantically. (And we are still friends and we enjoy talking about it and seeing the other person’s POV! As fandom stuff should go.) While I was explaining my perspective, I was surprised how much I was describing things that happened in past episodes, rather than clues about his feelings in that particular scene.

My friend was surprised too. She loves Molly Hooper, but she got it firmly in her head in season 1 that Sherlock would never be interested in Molly, and so the little Sherlolly-esque details I fixated on slipped past her completely. She viewed all their scenes in light of Sherlock having no interest in Molly. (Again, total valid reading–this post isn’t to say that she’s wrong and I am right!).

Anyway… I found myself reshaping my headcanons about John’s reaction to the ILY scene. Now I’m wondering if he would respond a lot like my friend, automatically assuming that Sherlock isn’t interested and he said “I love you” just to save her life. After all, John wasn’t around for the vast majority of their scenes together. I don’t know that he ever picked up on Sherlock’s feelings. In TLD, he calls Molly the last person Sherlock would ever think of. So what exactly does he think is going on with the phone call? And how long does it take him to realize what’s really going on with Sherlock and Molly? After all the craziness of Eurus, I doubt that would be the first thing on his mind…

anonymous asked:

love love love ur writing!! can u maybe write some more sleeeeepy Sherlock? I'm in love with how you write him falling asleep

Sherlock still finds it hard, sometimes, to allow himself to sleep. He usually never sleeps all the way through the night, his body jolting itself awake in preparation to run, to fight, to survive

He can still hear that voice in his year from those dark years: “Sleep. Remember sleep?” 

But now, Sherlock thinks, chastising himself, it really is just getting silly. He’s stretched out on the couch, hardly aware that he’s dozing, until there’s the sound of a door opening, and he jumps back into awareness.

“You okay?”

Stupid, stupid. John is standing in the doorway, he was coming back from Mrs Hudson’s, for God’s sake, why can’t he just calm down and rest-

Sherlock breathes out. He hopes how fast his heart is beating isn’t obvious, but it’s John, of course he will see. “Yeah,” he says, aiming for nonchalance. “I’ll- I’ll just um wash up-”

His legs are swinging round to the front of the couch, but John gently nudges them back with his hip.

“You’ve never washed the dishes in your life,” John says. And it’s in that tone Sherlock adores, the one that means fond and love and I understand. “It’s okay, stay there, Sherlock. You’re exhausted.”

“It’s fine. I’m- I’m awake now, so-”

John smiles and walks forward, brushing Sherlock’s hair back to kiss his forehead. “Yeah, but you don’t want to be,” he says, lips brushing against Sherlock’s skin. Sherlock can’t argue with that. 

John squeezes his shoulder gently, then moves to switch the TV on. The volume is kept down low- Sherlock doesn’t even register what channel or programme is playing. 

John walks in front of him, smiles, then heads into the kitchen. Sherlock’s eyes still drift over to the TV screen. It could just be him, but he swears the screen is getting fuzzier, harder to focus on.

He can hear John in the kitchen putting the kettle on to boil, running the tap for the dishes to soak in. It’s only when John starts softly signing (Frank Sinatra, maybe? He’s not quite sure), and when Sherlock’s eyes are blinking so much slower, that Sherlock realises:

Oh, John. Background noise.

And it’s working, Sherlock can feel himself calming, his body letting go. If he wasn’t so tired, he would leap up and kiss John then and there. He yawns, his eyes closing…and opening… and close…

From so very far away, he hears John shushing Rosie: “He’s sleeping now, love. I know, I know, you can see him later-”

And despite sleep washing over him, Sherlock still hears her little cry. Now, that won’t do. That won’t do at all.

“Hmm… not quite,” he murmurs. His eyes are too heavy to open anymore.

John’s footsteps come closer, treading carefully. “Almost,” he says, a laugh and a whisper all in one. 

Sherlock feels a little hand grip his finger. He smiles and with the last of his strength, wiggles his finger. Rosie giggles.

“Come on, now, there you go,” John says. He’s lifting Rosie back up. Sherlock lets his hand fall, feels his lips parting in sleep. 

The last thing he hears is John murmuring, “That’s it. You’re safe, okay? I promise you, I’ll be right here. I’ll wake you for dinner.”

[Stop. Before you even scroll down any further to read this post, please read this. I’m writing this list for 3 reasons, 

  1. Someone asked me recently why I ship Johnlock
  2. There’s been a lot of crap going round with people, not everyone, just certain individuals saying Johnlock isn’t going to happen, how its hurtful, disgusting blah blah blah. (If you don’t think it is, brilliant. But don’t slag the shippers off, please. I know again, certain individuals aren't kind about certain ships but it’s not all of us). And then..
  3. Because I purely want to.

I don’t mind what you ship. I ship Johnlock, obviously. If you ship Sheriarty or Sherlolly or whoever and whatever else. Well done. I don’t mind. This isn’t something I want hate on or want to be accused of hating other ships. I know there’s other ships out there and I’ve tried to leave out as many points as I can that will go against other ships and people may find offensive. This is a Johnlock blog, so I shall write about Johnlock. Take this as seriously as you want. Some of the points are very vague. This took me a while so, yeah, I hope you enjoy and thank you!]

100 Things that make Johnlock believable

  1. John lends Sherlock his phone. This isn’t really a big deal I know but I wouldn’t even let my friends borrow my phone let alone some random stranger I’d never even spoken to.
  2. They have undeniable chemistry. You can’t deny that, whoever you ship. 
  3. This isn’t really a reason why Johnlock is believable it’s more a reason why people ship it. People are scared. If someone else comes into the Sherlock/John equation, (Molly, Moriarty even Mycroft), will it affect the duo? The flow of them both. Maybe. That’s what I think anyway.
  4. Sherlock can’t handle John’s girlfriends. Yes, he’s coping with Mary (sort of) (okay, lets miss out the bit where she shot him) but he’s jealous of her. All of the time.
  5. Sherlock didn’t have friends. Not one. John had barely known him a day and he was running around London with him. They have an instant connection.
  6. John killed someone for Sherlock.
  7.  Sherlock killed someone for John.
  8. They stare at each other. Constantly. 
  9.  Sherlock never denies him and John being a couple.
  10. John can manage to remember 30+ moans coming from Sherlock’s phone throughout the day. I can barely remember what I did 5 minutes ago.. 
  11. “People might talk”. That’s John’s only issue. ‘So what if you just stripped some of my clothes off. I only care that people didn’t see’. Maybe he didn’t mind it at all then, because no one saw. 
  12. Sherlock is back on drugs after John leaves him to go on his honeymoon, basically has withdrawal symptoms. John replaced the drugs, but then he left again.
  13. Sherlock is incredibly sad at the wedding. John choosing Mary to dance with him over Sherlock seems to push him over the edge and make him leave.
  14.  John is the only man to render Sherlock speechless.
  15.  Sherlock taught John how to dance. That’s not really a reason but it’s incredibly intimate.
  16.  Mark said the BBC version is mostly inspired by The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes. In which Sherlock basically falls in love with John (incredibly cute, watch it). It’s probably one of the gayest adaptations.
  17.  Irene likes women, but she admits she fell for Sherlock. John is the same, which is basically what she’s saying.
    (John: “Who the hell knows about Sherlock Holmes, but if anyone out there still cares, I’m not actually gay”. 
    Irene: “Well, I am. Look at us both”).
  18.  Sherlock takes him to a gay club. He notices things. Surely he’d notice that. 
  19.  The drunk scene is so flirtatious it hurts.
  20.  "I don’t mind".
  21.  Sherlock came back to life for John. Came back from the dead. From. The. Dead.
  22.  The scenes in Sherlock’s mind palace are the places he and John had their first case together. Sentiment, obviously.
  23. They say you look for one of your parents in the person you fall in love with. Well Sherlock’s parents basically cosplayed them. 
  24.  "You. It’s always you. John Watson, you keep me right.“
  25.  When Sherlock’s solving cases with Molly, John’s voice is there, in his head. Always.
  26.  Sherlock stuck John’s head on a picture of the Vitruvian Man, which was Leonardo Da Vinci's representation of an 'ideal man’. 
  27.  "Bitterness is a paralytic. Love is a much more vicious motivator”. That’s why Sherlock shoots Magnussen for John. (I know I already mentioned this but I found a cool quote okay). 
  28.  Can’t believe I nearly missed the cheeky wink when they first met.
  29.  The moment at Angelo’s when Sherlock thinks John is hitting on him. Sherlock doesn’t get things wrong. 99% of the time he’s right. So when he thinks someone is flirting with him, he’s probably right.
  30.  John definitely takes a peek when Sherlock drops his sheet at Buckingham Palace. 
  31.  The hug at the wedding. We’ve never seen them hug before so it’s kind of a new step for their relationship.
  32.  At the pool Sherlock gives John a glance and John nods, knowing exactly what he’s thinking.
  33.  John makes him beg. Twice.
  34.  John forgives him. His best friend left him for 2 years, pretending he was dead and John forgave him like that. You’ve gotta love someone pretty bad to do that. (Even if he did tackle him to the floor.. and punch him.. though he did deserve it).
  35.  On the tube, in John’s last moments, he spends it telling Sherlock how much of a great man he is. 
  36. 'Not gay’ doesn’t imply he’s straight.
  37.  John was willing to get shot to take down Moriarty, telling Sherlock to run and save his own life. 
  38.  My best friend doesn’t point out my cheekbones.
  39.  The best man speech. Nobody could even imagine Sherlock saying anything like that but he said it all, for John. 
  40.  "Is yours a snorer?“. John kinda just gives up denying they’re a couple here.
  41.  John says he doesn’t like his middle name, though he exclaims it when he’s jealous over Irene and Sherlock. 
  42.  Sherlock says to Irene: "Why would I want to have dinner if I wasn't hungry?”, yet he does that an awful lot with John. 
  43.  Their lack of personal space is unbelievable.
  44.  John looks to see if Sherlock is wearing pants at Buckingham Palace under the sheet. Looks. At his crotch.
  45.  The look across the car park when Sherlock realises John shot the cabbie. 
  46.  Sherlock gets rid of John’s armchair, presumably because he doesn’t like seeing it empty.
  47.  Mrs Hudson had it from day 1: “There’s another bedroom upstairs if you'll be needing two bedrooms”.
  48.  “You're hardly going to need me around now you’ve got a real baby on the way”. Cries.
  49.  "Remember Redbeard? Don't get involved”, e.g. Remember the last time you loved and then lost.
  50. Sherlock acts more like the bride at the wedding then Mary actually does: 

    A) The photographer says, “just the bride and groom, please”, and he doesn’t even move.

    B) He’s the only person we see giving vows.

    C) He throws his flower to Janine (just like the bride would traditionally throw her bouquet).

    D) He taught John how to dance, which actual is quite a feminine role too.

  51. John looks extremely unimpressed that Sherlock has a girlfriend.
  52. Mary sort of acts like a romantic shield, as John in the third series seems more open to discuss relationships and his feelings, even about gay matters, for example when being searched by one of Magnussen’s men, he makes an innuendo joke.
  53. . “I don't understand, why would it upset YOU?”, because he cares Sherlock, duhh.
  54.  The determination Sherlock has to get John out of the fire, yes I know, this one could be seen as just a friend helping a friend but the panic on Sherlock’s face and the way he had no fear of burn marks or anything. 
  55.  In His Last Vow, John wakes up from dreaming about Sherlock, even though he was laying next to his wife.
  56.  I know I’ve already mentioned Sherlock shooting Magnussen but he does sacrifice his career, freedom and life to protect John.
  57.  Sue said to, "treat the music like a script in itself”, e.g. they play 'We Found Love’ in the background of the stag scene.
  58.  When Sherlock shakes John’s hand goodbye, he takes his glove off to touch his skin one last time.
  59.  "Since it’s unlikely we’ll ever meet again I might as well say it now…", I really don’t think that, “Sherlock is actually a girl’s name”, is what he was going to say. 
  60.  That scene (in point 60) was quite obviously set up to make us think Sherlock was actually going to declare his love. So it could happen.
  61.  The tears in Sherlock’s eyes when he’s on the plane, leaving John. 
  62.  Sherlock says the case (when they’re drunk) is 'touching’. He describes a case including same sex romance as 'touching’. That’s surely saying something. Sherlock doesn’t find many things touching..
  63.  Molly mentions having met Tom’s parents. Shortly after John meets Sherlock’s, however, he hasn’t (I know, it’s impossible, but still, my point) meet Mary’s. 
  64.  Sherlock says, “All the nice girls like a soldier”, to which John replies, “it’s sailor”. Did Sherlock slip up there on purpose because he likes a soldier???
  65. “I want to be up there with the two people that I love and care about most in the world. Mary Morstan, and… you”. Ouch. The feels. 
  66.  "Today you sit between the woman you have made your wife and the man you have saved, in short the two people who love you most in all this world", and now Sherlock hits me right in the feels too.
  67.  While we see Sherlock telling everyone how much he loves and cares for John, it’s interesting in the fact they don’t bother showing the ceremony between John and Mary. Not even a glimpse. 
  68.  John talks about Major Sholto in a way in which a lot of fans implied they used to have something going on. I think Sherlock thought this too as he seems jealous. 
  69.  "Oh, Sherlock! Neither of us were the first, you know". Even Mary can see he’s jealous.
  70.  John calls Sherlock, “nurse”. Mary is a nurse so can be seen as a parallel? 
  71.  The only two people we see John perform medically on is the man naked from the waist down at the clinic and Bainbridge, who’s naked from the shower. Two naked men. Coincidence? Hmm. 
  72.  An 'Elephant in the Room’ actually means, an obvious fact that nobody is pointing out. It’s mostly said when talking about someone’s sexuality, for example homosexual attraction. One of their cases is called 'The Elephant in the Room’.
  73.  In His Last Vow, in the scene where Sherlock brings Mary to the house and John is secretly there when Sherlock makes Mary identify herself, there is a shot taken from above. It clearly shows Sherlock at one end of the corridor and John at the other, Mary coming in between them.
  74.  Sherlock says, “I was waiting until we got married”, so obviously avoiding sex with Janine as marriage was never going to happen. Or maybe not avoiding sex with Janine, more the fact he didn’t want to have sex with a woman?
  75.  "I’d be lost without my blogger". Uses 'my’, basically labelling John as his own. 
  76.  John went out with many women, but only married one of them (Mary) when Sherlock was dead. Maybe if Sherlock was alive and hadn’t approved, like he did with John’s other girlfriends, the proposal may not have happened.
  77.  Before they met, John was a broken war hero and Sherlock was lonely and isolated. After they met, they both seemed to cure each other. They both became happy, especially being around each other.
  78.  If I had human body parts in my fridge, I’d have to love the person quite a lot who put them there to let them stay in my house.
  79.  Moffat said that John is, “infatuated and fascinated” by Sherlock. Sexually? Well, that’s your judgement I guess.
  80.  When John breaks up with Jeanette his (sexual, most probably) partner, he barely batters an eyelid, yet when Sherlock leaves, he’s affected, massively. (Okay it’s kinda different because Sherlock 'died’ but I’m promising you 100 reasons and I’m at 98 haha)
  81.  John had to trust Sherlock with his life, many times. He did it without even hesitating.
  82.  Sherlock healed John’s leg. Basically.
  83.  Not really a point but, 99% of the things done in Sherlock are on purpose. You don’t do things by accident on TV and they keep them in. The stares, the touches, the facial expressions. They are all there for a reason.
  84.  The stars scene. Where Sherlock points out the stars in The Great Game. I find that awfully romantic. 
  85.  Sherlock drugs him. It’s an awful thing to do but John practically, instantly, forgives him. 
  86.  At the end of The Hounds of Baskerville when Sherlock is laughing with John when John is eating, that look the innkeeper person gives Sherlock. It’s like a sort of knowing look.
  87.  "I asked you for one more miracle. I asked you to stop being dead”. Sherlock’s reply to that is the most sincere, kind and heartwarming way I swear we have ever heard him spoke (not including when he lies to victims haha) when he says, “I heard you”. You can hear how much he cares in just those 3 words.
  88.  Sherlock remembers how John takes his tea. John’s tea habits are more important then that the earth goes round the sun.
  89.  In Reichenbach, John punches a police officer just because they say something bad about Sherlock.
  90.  Sherlock says, “Alone is what I have, alone protects me”, but I think he soon realises he does in fact need John by his side, that’s why he goes back to the drugs.
  91.  Sherlock jumped off the roof to save John’s life. If he had came away from that situation alive, John would have been shot, as well as Mrs Hudson and Lestrade. But he had to sacrifice himself for the people he cares most about.
  92.  So this isn’t in the series but on John’s blog so it does count. Sherlock writes, 'John would ask me if he was here’. Another sign he needs John with him. 
  93.  John shaved his moustache off purely because Sherlock said it didn’t suit him.
  94.  "Girlfriend? No, not really my area". “So you’ve got a boyfriend then?”. “No”. So a girlfriend is off the list completely, not his area, but when asked if he has a boyfriend the answer is a straight, 'no’. (Sorry to anyone who ships Sherlock with Molly/Irene/Janine, etc, I guess he could have changed his mind).
  95.  I prefer my Doctor’s clean shaven. Pretty flirtatious. 
  96.  The picture taken of the drunk scene. It’s an official promo picture and they’re holding hands. Yes, they’re 'drunk’ but they are, in fact, holding hands.
  97.  Sherlock see’s Mary shooting him in her wedding dress. Some kind of metaphor, surely?
  98.  Everyone. Absolutely everyone assumes they’re together. Mycroft, Mrs Hudson, Kitty Reilly, Angelo, etc.
  99.  Sherlock outs Mary in front of John because I think he’s concerned for John. I think he’s scared John might get hurt so he manages to get Mary to admit who she is when John is present.
  100. In The Hounds of Baskerville when John goes all military, Sherlock’s face is the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.

Thank you!

Mycroft Holmes: [Exists]

Me: 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

War, what is it good for?  Good God, y’all

I’m pretty quiet on here.  I follow tags, and a few people, but I don’t post much.  I doubt many people will see this, but I don’t care, i need to write it.

I love tumblr for all my secret shipping needs, but why are so many fandoms full of so much heterophobia?  My spell checker doesn’t recognize that word, so I guess I’m making it up.  But it’s what I feel every time I check in on one of my het ship tags and see all the drama and hate. Seriously, just because someone’s ship/OTP is het doesn’t mean they are a bad person, or boring, or homophobic, or whatever.  I say “heterophobia” because never have I seen so much hate toward “heteronormativity” than in some of the biggest fandoms on here.  It’s really bad right now in the Sherlock world, but I see it everywhere.

Every one of my hetero ships gets people in the tag belittling the ship, calling the shippers blind, boring, too heteronormative, etc.  How about: we just like the chemistry between two characters who happen to be of opposite genders?

For the record, I, myself, am bi.  Some of my ships are het, some are gay, and I don’t give a shit what you ship, because in the end, we’re all fans, and ship wars are stupid.  We are the truest of fans, the people who experience a fictional world, be it a movie, a TV show, a video game, whatever, and instead of just moving on to the next thing, we dedicate ourselves to it, and bond with others who feel the same. How about we love each other and our fictional worlds, because if fictional worlds can’t be inclusive, then how the fuck are we going to get anywhere in the real world?

Love and Breadcrumbs (John and Sherlock's relationship arc): His Last Vow

MASTER POST on John and Sherlock’s relationship beats in S03:03 His Last Vow.

WITH THANKS to mid0nz, ivyblossom, loudest-subtext-in-television and arcfanmom, among others.

A note about “Beats”: A beat is a moment in a story when something new happens to change the dynamic (or reinforce the dynamic). A screenplay typically has a rhythm of positive and negative beats. This creates tension (I love you/I hate you). My judgments of beats here is strictly related to the John/Sherlock relationship plotline. So, for instance, Sherlock dying and resurrecting himself for John is ‘positive’ because it shows how much Sherlock cares about John, even though the same scene might be a negative beat on the CAM mystery case plotline.

SCENE:    John dreams of Sherlock and goes off to look for the neighbor’s kid at a crack den

  • John is bored in his “safe” marriage and dreams of Sherlock and danger.
  • When talking to Isaac’s mother, John is role-playing Sherlock – the blue robe, the cruel questions, etc.  Source post: uberchunks.
  • John is irritable with Mary he goes to a crack den to rescue Isaac and resists her coming along. She does anyway. 
  • Positive beat (+)

Sub-text: John misses life with Sherlock. The safe suburban life is not for him. 

SCENE:    At the crack den, BAMF!John beats up a guy

  • Positive beat (+)

Sub-text: John craves the danger Sherlock provided, acts out to get his fix. 

SCENE:   John finds Sherlock at the crack den and takes him to the lab to have his blood tested. Molly confirms Sherlock is high.

  • They haven’t seen each other for a month, but it’s unclear who avoided whom. My bets on both–Sherlock because he’s defensively withdrawing; John because he’s not sure how to handle his renewed attraction from TSoT when Sherlock was being so nice. (with a nod to loudest-subtext-in-television)
  • John yells at Sherlock - “If you felt this (drugs) coming on, why didn’t you call me?”  Anti-social Sherlock says its for a case, dismissing everyone’s concern. 
  • Molly slaps Sherlock for “wasting his gifts”. Sherlock comments on her lack of engagement ring. Molly confirms that her relationship with Tom is off.  In S3 Molly/Tom mirror (and predict) John/Mary.  Both Molly and John tried to get over Sherlock by dating someone similar. Neither will find it satisfactory.  (Source: leandraholmes)
  • Wiggy deduces in the lab that John has been biking to work. Sherlock mentions it too. Sherlock mentions the attack on Wiggy was a fix for John. This is tying John’s biking and attacking Wiggy to Sherlock’s drugs–coping mechanisms.
  • Negative beat (-)

Sherlock subtext: I can’t deal with John getting married and eased the pain with drugs. I’m withdrawing from him and everyone else.

John subtext: See? Sherlock is self-destructive and can’t be trusted. 

SCENE:   At Baker Street, Mycroft is running a drugs bust

  • John called Mycroft about the drugs.

Subtext:  John is really worried and needs help dealing with this. He’s putting Sherlock in a child’s position here (not undeservedly).

  • Mycroft says Sherlock is “back on the sauce” and compares his drug use to “Uncle Rudy’s cross-dressing.”

Subtext:  Possible dig from Mycroft about Sherlock’s attraction to 'straight’ John.  (Source: nibsandink)

SCENE:   At Baker Street, John discovers Janine

gif by holmeswatsn

  • God!  The look on Martin’s face above with that fake smile and absolutely unhappy and confused eyes!
  • John discovers a nearly naked Janine in Sherlock’s bedroom. An astonished John confronts Sherlock about this and Sherlock plays it up, saying they’re in a relationship.  John displays strong jealousy and is fixated on Janine no matter how Sherlock tries to change the subject.

Subtext:  John is still in love with Sherlock.

Possible subtext:  Sherlock is enjoying making John jealous.

  • John tells Janine Sherlock is in the bath – “I’m sure he’ll be out in a minute.” And Janine says “Oh, like he ever is.” Possible reference to not “being out” as a gay man?  (Source: il0vedaydreaming)
  • ASiB callback– John keeps asking Sherlock about “dinner”.  In ASiB Irene keeps inviting Sherlock to 'dinner’, meaning sex. (Source: 221beemine/anon). 

Subtext:  Are you having sex with Janine?  I need to understand this. I need to know if you’re a) not asexual and b) heterosexual, because I NEED to know if I ever have a shot.

  • Also, at the flat, Sherlock has moved John’s chair out.  

Subtext: Sherlock can’t bear losing John and is trying to avoid all reminders.  Also, possibly, Sherlock couldn’t bear for Janine to sit in it.

  • Negative beat (-)

John thinks Janine is confirmation that, if Sherlock sleeps with anyone, it’s women (Janine, Irene).

SCENE:  Sherlock proposes to Janine in order to get her to let them into CAM’s private office

  • When John sees the ring, he is aghast.  He has just heard it is Janine up there, and in this moment he puts it together–that Sherlock has used Janine and that he’s now even proposing to her to manipulate her into letting them in.
  • John as they get in the elevator: “Sherlock, she loves you!” Sherlock: “As I said, human error.” The visual language here says it all.

Subtext (Sherlock): I loved you and got crushed so I’m going back to my cold, sociopathic facade.

Subtext (John):  I was right, you’re incapable of feeling for anyone. You crushed and discarded me just as you are doing to Janine (the fall).  Do I really even know you and what you’re capable of (the Moriarty mirror shot).

  • Negative beat. This is the MOST DESTRUCTIVE beat in this entire episode.  It reinforces the “Big Misunderstanding” that Sherlock doesn’t care for John.

SCENE:  Mary shoots Sherlock in Magnussen’s office

  • This is a crucial moment for the John/Sherlock arc because Mary is currently the obstacle between them.  At this moment, we know she’s a villain. Though she seems to recover in John’s eyes, and maybe even Sherlock’s in this episode, she will never recover in the eyes of the audience.  Nor, ultimately, can she prevail in any half-sane story.

Subtext:  Sooner or later Mary will pay dearly for this. She won’t ultimately win.

  • The above shot as Mary shoots Sherlock is likely foreshadowing. We see three Marys here. We’ve already seen two–the charming Mary of TEH and TSoT and now the blackmailed ex-assassin of HLV. Also, in TSoT John tries to interest Sherlock in a case– “My husband is three people.” Could there be yet another aspect of Mary still to come in S4?  (Source:  anybannannie)
  • Mary shoots Sherlock in the chest, a wound almost certain to kill but not instantly (see Pocket Owl’s comments on the wound). She calls for an ambulance – her way of giving Sherlock a slim chance and avoiding guilt? Good discussion here. (source: Mycroft Holmes Fan)  

  • We also have the obvious symbolism of Mary shooting Sherlock in the chest.  She’s the one who has broken his heart by marrying John. We even see her, for a moment, shoot him while wearing her wedding dress. This shot comes immediately before the Sherlock-Redbeard bit, tying them together. Mary is why Sherlock lost John.
  • Positive beat (Mary is doomed). 

SCENE: Sherlock dies and fights his way back from the dead for John’s sake.

  • Sherlock descends into his mind palace.  The stairways and hall look like the ones in ASiP (showing how deeply meeting John influenced him).

  • In order to 'calm himself’ and keep from going into shock, Sherlock remembers Redbeard, his dog. Mycroft warned Sherlock to not be too attached to John by comparing the situation to Redbeard.  Sherlock tells Redbeard “They’re putting me down too.  It’s no fun, is it?”

Subtext:  Sherlock is capable of deep attachment, but got his heart broken as a child when his beloved dog was put down. He probably determined not to care after that. Paralleling his loss of John.

Subtext:  I’m no longer needed, because John has moved on.

  • In the cell with chained Moriarty, Sherlock asks Moriarty how he manages to avoid feeling.  Moriarty says you have to feel, you just don’t have to fear it.  Even loss is 'good’.

Sub-text:  Part of Sherlock wants to eradicate his painful, frustrated feelings for John, but part of him knows that even pain and loss should be borne but not feared.

  • Sherlock literally dies, but pulls himself back FROM FLATLINE (by pounding the floor of the cell and restarting his own heart)  to ‘save John’ from Mary’s evil influence.

Subtext (Sherlock): I love you (John) in an extraordinarily powerful way.  

  • Very positive beat

SCENE:  John discovers Sherlock shot and calls an ambulance

  • We don’t see a lot of John during the shooting or at bedside in hospital. This episode keeps John remote. It’s more about Sherlock’s sacrifice and his POV.  Let’s just say John is very, very not happy here.  He sticks with Sherlock in the ambulance and keeps close tabs on him in hospital (though this is all kept off screen and veiled to the viewer).  This is really the minimum they could show of John’s reaction and keep him in character.

Sub-text:  John is incredibly upset about anyone daring to harm Sherlock, but we’re deliberately being kept away from much of his POV, probably because he’s still guarding his heart and the writers don’t intend that to shift until S4.

  • Neutral beat

SCENE:  Janine visits Sherlock in the hospital and discusses their sex life

  • First, let’s just contemplate the fact that they show both Mary and Janine bedside with Sherlock in hospital but never John.  John was there, we’re just not shown those moments with Sherlock. Why? John is being kept at a distance from us. We’re not sure what’s going through his mind. Showing him bedside would reveal too much, one way or the other.
  • Also in hospital, John tells Mary that Sherlock’s first word when he woke up was “Mary”. John looks a bit confused at that.

Sub text:  Wow, now he actually likes you more than me. Confirms John’s confusion over what Sherlock feels for him. (Source: thescienceofarticulation)

  • Janine has sold her story to the tabloids, making up wild sex stories about Sherlock. Alone, she tells him she wishes they had done it “at least once.”  Sherlock says he was waiting until after they were married.  Janine says ” I know what kind of man you are. We could have been friends.”
  • Positive beat

Subtext (and text): Blatant confirmation that Sherlock is gay (which we were told in TSoT). He never had sex with Janine or Irene.

(hmmm moment)  On the other hand, if John sees the stories and believes them, will he be more convinced Sherlock is straight? Or will he know they are false? 

SCENE:  Sherlock drags himself out of the hospital bed and confronts Mary at The Empty House.

  • Sherlock drags himself out of the hospital bed in order to confront Mary.

Subtext: Again, Sherlock is going through extraordinary, life-threatening measures, and physical pain, for John.

  • Sherlock sets up a scenario at the Empty House in which Mary confesses in front of John.  John now knows what Mary is and that she shot Sherlock. He’s PISSED.
  • Positive beat. 

Subtext:  Sherlock has beaten Mary. There’s no way John can go back to her now.

  • Sherlock is deducing here. He tests hypothesis #1 by getting Mary to shoot the coin. She’s a crack shot. He says he could have given him a kill shot if she’d wanted to. No, that shot was 'surgery’.  [we know Sherlock did die, and die quckly, so there are problems with this. But for now let’s accept that, yes, she could have shot him in the brain or heart.]
  • Mary tells Sherlock if John knew “It would break him. And I would lose him forever.  And I will never let that happen.”  She also seems about to shoot Sherlock again when he’s in the shadows, before he reminds her that her face is projected on the building.

Subtext:  Mary’s love is selfish. She wants to keep John for her own sake and is willing to kill Sherlock to achieve that.  This is set up to contrast with Sherlock, whose love is unselfish.  (Source: loudest-subtext-in-television)

Shot analysis:  The shot below shows that John (on the right) has a narrow path with no escape. His path will lead him to Sherlock, but first he has to get past Mary.  (Source:  madcapped)

SCENE:  At the flat, Sherlock talks John into listening to Mary (and ultimately returning to her).

  • Sherlock tells John that he choose Mary because he is “abnormally attracted to dangerous situations and people”.  John, devastated, replies “Yeah, but she wasn’t supposed to be like that.”  (ouch, the heartbreak)
  • Positive beat.  This is the biggest johnlock signpost this episode.  

Subtext:  John was 'abnormally attracted’ to Sherlock. Mary was unconsciously chosen as a Sherlock substitute. But John did not recognize this. He thought he’d chosen Mary because she was a safe place to put his heart whereas Sherlock broke it. So now John has a wife who is just as dangerous as Sherlock AND he doesn’t get to have Sherlock himself (which is what he wants) in exchange for that risk.  Question: does Sherlock realize what he’s implying about John? I don’t think he does. He was astonished John considered him his 'best friend’. He didn’t realize Molly was in love with him. He knows John is attracted to danger and thus life with him, but I believe he still thinks John is straight sexually.

Also:  John had trust issues from S1.E1. What is this further betrayal going to do to his ability to ever trust again?

  • John tells Mary to take a seat like a client and he and Sherlock will decide her fate.
  • Positive beat. 

Subtext:  Now it’s me and Sherlock against you (vs the wedding where Sherlock was the 3rd wheel). We’re a team who will figure out what’s to be done.

  • Mary asks Sherlock “What do you know already” and Sherlock says: “By your skill set, you are or were an intelligence agent. Your accent is currently English but I suspect you are not. You’re on the run from something. You’ve used your skills to disappear, Magnussen knows your secret, which is why you were going to kill him, and I assume you befriended Janine in order to get close to him.”  Note that none of these things are unforgivable by themselves.
  • Sherlock then tests hypothesis #2: he times how long it takes for an ambulance to get to his flat.  It takes 8 minutes and John didn’t find him for five = thirteen minutes. The ambulance got there well before that. He thus concludes that Mary called the ambulance immediately after shooting him. This seems to be the last bit that turns Sherlock’s attitude around.

Subtext: Mary was being blackmailed by Magnussen and she was trying to protect John. She behaved like a cornered rat. She didn’t give me an immediately lethal gunshot and sentiment made her call the ambulance. She does care about me.

Analysis: Mary did not, in fact, call the ambulance, which I suspect we’ll learn in S4. Others have posited it was Magnussen. A dead Sherlock means he’s lost his hold on Mycroft, and we saw Magnussen awake when John found Sherlock.  In addition, we know the shot she gave him was lethal as he began to die almost immediately. Sherlock wants to believe in Mary. Moffat said in an interview that Sherlock was told Redbeard “went to live in a big meadow” and he chose to believe it because he could not handle the emotion otherwise. We’re seeing this here. It’s he himself who is blinded by sentiment.

  • Mary neither confirms nor denies Sherlock’s excuses on her behalf. Sherlock is giving John a reason to forgive Mary. 
  • When Sherlock collapses after the paramedics arrive, his last words to John are these:  “John, Magnussen is all that matters now.  You can trust Mary. She saved my life.” He then collapses.  So his final words to John, while again at death’s door are– Trust Mary.
  • Negative beat.

Further Reference:  Did Mary mean to kill Sherlock? post  and The Problem with Mary.

  • Shot analysis:  In the scene where Mary is being 'judged’ by John and Sherlock she is all in neutral colors.  She is not the dominant one here; her future is unknown. Later, once she has won John back, she is in bright red.

TIME GAP

  • There is a the time gap of “several months” in which John is not speaking to Mary. Surely there would have been development on the John/Sherlock line in 2 months he’s not speaking to his wife. We can assume the gap was put there because a) they wanted Mary to be more pregnant when Moriarty shows up and b) they wanted the Magnussen denouement scene to happen at Christmas. So like the writers, we’ll ignore the gap.  
  • Alternative interpretation – there is something significant that happens here, perhaps 'plans put in place’ by Sherlock, Mycroft and/or John, that won’t be revealed until S4.

SCENE:  John forgives Mary and reconciles with her

  • Holmes parents mirror.  At the Christmas party, Sherlock’s dad (the ‘ordinary’ guy who dresses like John) tells Mary he always found Sherlock’s mom (the ‘genius’ who dresses like Sherlock) ‘unbelievably hot’.  Source: 221behavior.

Subtext:  John has always found Sherlock 'unbelievably hot’.  And yes, Martin always played it like that IMHO. Can we blame him?  

Also see this post on how the show sexualizes Sherock visually when he’s shown from John’s POV. (Source professorfangirl)

  • Positive beat (+).
  • Mycroft tells Sherlock that Magnussen is “not a dragon for you to slay”.  Setting up an analogy.
  • John forgives a very pregnant Mary and takes her back. He says he never looked at the USB that held all her secrets. He doesn’t want to know.

Sub-text: Sherlock broke my heart (in the fall) and is incapable of feeling genuinely for someone else (confirmed by Janine), so I’m throwing my lot in with you.  Maybe you really can be my Sherlock substitute since now I know you’re dangerous. And, you know, we actually have sex. And you’re carrying my child.  

I do believe John loves Mary, though I don’t think it will ever be the “soul bond” he has with Sherlock (and also, Mary is really much worse that he’s given her credit for). He’s still redirecting.

  • Very negative beat.
  • Shot analysis:  Note Mary in bright red.  She’s dominant in this scene. She’s getting her way.

CLIMATIC SCENE:  Sherlock sacrifices himself by shooting CAM in front of government agents to protect Mary (but really John).

  • Magnussen says here that Sherlock’s pressure point is John and John’s is Mary.  

Subtext:  Mary is John’s priority now. He’s still distancing himself from Sherlock over the broken heart/trust issue.

  • John tells Magnussen he 'doesn’t understand’ and Magnussen tells him to put it on a T-shirt–and then 'still don’t understand’ on the back. This is funny, however it serves another purpose…

Subtext:  John doesn’t understand what’s going on in this whole scene. He won’t understand why Sherlock kills Magnussen.

  • Magnussen calls John, while watching the bonfire footage, a “damel in distress.”  This ties with with Mycroft’s dragon metaphor.

Subtext:  We’re being told clearly who Sherlock kills Magnussen (the dragon) for. John is the 'damsel in distress’, not Mary. Sherlock slays the dragon for John. (and in the end, the damsel goes home with someone else, but we all know it’s not supposed to end like that).

ALT READ:  Mary is ultimately the 'dragon’ that Sherock will save John from. RE: Mycroft’s “Magnussen is not a dragon for you to slay”

  • Sherlock, realizing, Magnussen has the dirt on Mary only in his own head, shoots him in front of approaching government agents and Mycoft, stealing John’s gun to do so.  He tells John “Give Mary my love. Tell her she’s safe now”.  Indicating, again, that Sherlock has really forgiven Mary.
  • He does this to protect Mary and John, fulfilling the vow he made at their wedding.
  • IMHO, he also does it in sheer rage from watching Magnussen flick John’s face, humiliating John.  Don’t touch John Watson, MoFo!
  • Positive beat.

Subtext (Sherlock): I love you so much, I’m giving up my life and my work so you can be happy with Mary and safe from the people that would harm you and Mary and the baby.

Subtext (John):  John is pretty much in shock here, but when Sherlock says “Give Mary my love,” I think John processes Sherlock actions as a) sociopathic and dangerous (Sherlock being Sherlock) and b) for Mary. He doesn’t recognize that Sherlock did it out of love for him. This is underscored by Magnussen’s jokes about John not understanding and the T-shirt.  This is a call back to Mary telling John to put “I don’t shave for Sherlock Holmes” on a T-shirt. John was equally in denial about what was really going on there.

WRAP UP SCENE:  Sherlock is being sent into permanent exile (and to his death).  He says good-bye to John at the plane.

  • Sherlock is being sent into exile, never to see John again. As they say goodbye, Sherlock tells John his full name (William Sherlock Scott Holmes).

Subtext:  I’m giving you something no one else has of me. (source: mid0nz!)

Also a callback to ASiB, the episode where John realizes his feelings for Sherlock.

Analysis: Sherlock uses his one extraordinary name and hides the ordinary ones. He has a need to be seen as extraordinary. John is the opposite. He hides his odder name (Hamish) and goes by his plain names. He has a need to be seen as/and or disguises himself as ordinary. (Source: oldgrimalkin)

  • Sherlock says he has something to tell John he’s never said before and then tells a joke. 

Subtext option #1:  Sherlock is going to tell John he loves him but chickens out at the last minute.

Subtext option #2:  Sherlock is letting John go and he doesn’t want to burden him with guilt or remorse so he jokes like it’s not big deal. (self-sacrificing).  

Subtext option #3: Sherlock wants to see John smile one last time.

IMHO – 2 & 3

  • They shake hands and part.  John seems a bit moved but not overly unconcerned about losing Sherlock forever.

Subtext (John): I’ll miss you, but you’re really not capable of caring for me in any meaningful way (the Fall, confirmed by Janine), so maybe it’s for the best.  I have Mary and the baby to care for now.  This is John’s cracks showing and his serious trust issues.

  • In this scene, Mary is wearing red.  She tells Sherlock she’ll “keep John in trouble.”

Subtext (Mary):  You can leave him with me. I can keep him satisfied. Buh-bye.

  • Very negative beat

Shot Analysis:  Mary is glaringly wearing red in this shot. She is the dominant one. She is the one getting her way here.  She’s won. (Source: me and 221BeeMine)

  • After they find out Moriarty is still alive, Mary seems oddly upset “You said he was dead, Moriarty.”  

Tentative Subtext:  Moriarty’s return threatens Mary in some way (beyond the obvious that he’s a known master criminal)?

SUMMATION of HLV and Season 3: 

As I wrote in my post “Penance: Sherlock in S3”, the overwhelming theme of S3 is that Sherlock returns to a shattered John Watson and spends all of S3 trying to atone for what he’s done. Sherlock does not offer John a good reason why he faked his own death and disappeared. He’s flippant and even cruel in the subway in TEH. So while John tentatively ‘forgives him’, in reality, John has decided never to trust Sherlock with his heart again. He will give that to Mary.  There are moments in TSoT where Sherlock shows John he really does care. But in HLV, the situation with Janine reinforces to John that Sherlock is heartless to those who love him.  Finding out Mary has lied to him the entire time further breaks John down and undermines his ability to trust anyone. 

Sherlock, on the other hand, goes through tremendous growth in S3. He has a sexual awakening and comes to a conscious recognition that he is in love with John Watson, but he realizes this too late. He subsequently buries the pain by going back to drugs. But when John is in danger again, Sherlock sacrifices everything for John, showing that he has learned to love selflessly.  John, unfortunately, does not know how Sherlock feels.  This is the “big misunderstanding”.

At the end of S3, Mary has won John back, and Sherlock is left out in the cold.  The season ends on a negative beat in the John/Sherlock plotline (then again, S2 did as well).

Other Resources: 

Shots that parallel shots in “A Study in Pink” by the-sherlocked-avatar

Ivyblossom on John’s state of mind in S3 (hasn’t forgiven Sherlock)

Marsdaydream on how John substitutes Mary for Sherlock

Indy “T-Bone” Falcon on why John blames himself

acafanmom on the same

Speculation on the future of johnlock by loudest-subtext-in-television

Good medical discussion on the gunshot wound by Pocket Owl and kate221b. Thank God for smart fans.

Theory on Sherlock and Mycroft plotting to take Mary down later due to the baby by obscure affection.

A theory that Sherlock is placating Mary until the baby is born from wsswatson. (I don’t subscribe to this theory.  See my response here.  But it’s an interesting counter argument.)

I’ll update this post as I discover more, so please PM me if you have something to add.

XA

Say what you will about The Final Problem...

Sherlock playing Irene’s Theme when Eurus asked him to play an original piece and him beating the shit out of that coffin because he knows he hurt Molly who’s very important to him broke me and healed me at the same time. And the realisation as to why he will give his life to save John because even unconsciously he knows he already lost a best friend once. Then don’t even get me started on Mycroft….

So if I were to describe my feels right now…

Originally posted by dangbenedict

Welcome Back (Jack Gilinsky imagine)

| Requested by emmie-wilson: Can you do an imagine where you moved away from Omaha for a while and when you come back jack g invites you to a party and your confused cause he use to bully you and at the party he gets drunk and tells you how much he missed you and he’s sorry and that he actually likes you (MASTERLIST)

Omaha.

I was back in my hometown for a while before going back to college in Washington. I hadn’t come here in ages. Feeling the Nebraska air felt good actually. I felt like everything came back.

“(Y/N)! Wow, you look good!” Johnson said as he opened the door to Jack Gilinsky’s house. I was wondering why the fuck boy himself didn’t open the door.

Fun fact: the guy that teased me the most back in high school, invited me to his party. And I was still confused of why he invited me. I mean, I hadn’t talked to him in years and suddenly he fucking invites me to his party?

Johnson and I hugged for a split second and I pulled back quickly. I smelled weed, cigarettes and booze. The smell was surprising at first, but I quickly got used to it.

Keep reading

doctorcaseyholmes  asked:

Saw the trailer. Freaking out!!! But I noticed a tiny something. On the door in the trailer, under the "No Entry", there's a small "(W)" under the "ry" of entry. I'm assuming this ties back to the W mentioned on the card w/ the rose in the deleted scene from HLV and the glimpse of the rose we see @ the beside that John is standing @ in the trailer - which might also have a "W" on the card sitting next to it? This the name of the villain? Or something else?

Hey Lovely!

I don’t think that’s a (W)… but who knows. 

And as for the hospital scene:

I think it could take place after Sherlock falls the second time in HLV after Mary is revealed, and John is contemplating what to do next. But it looks like he has the swoopy swish in better quality pics, so it could be anything at this point. I’m tentatively gonna say JOHN’S mind bungalow, as he’s remembering Sherlock on the bed.

But anyway, Irene is usually brought up in circumstances when Sherlock and John have to face their feelings for each other, so could be!

Sorry I’m not more informative. My brain has melted.

Campaigning…isn’t that what politicians do?“ Benedict Cumberbatch has been on the phone for less than a minute, and it’s already obvious he’s in a bit of a playful mood. The British actor — who you either know from his starmaking turn on the BBC import Sherlock, as a villain in projects as varied as 12 Years a Slave and Star Trek Into Darkness, or as the subject of endless fawning memes — is en route to the Palm Springs Film Festival, where he’ll pick up the Ensemble Award alongside other cast members of his latest movie, The Imitation Game. In a few weeks, the 38-year-old star will add "Oscar nominee” to his resumé and, per the endless predictions of seasonal industry drum-beaters, will be one of the five men up for the Best Actor Academy Award. But for now, Cumberbatch is in a car, calling to chat about the reason for all this buzz and jokingly questioning an interviewer’s use of the word “campaigning.”

“It suggests that what I’m doing falls under the category of ‘work,’” he says, “when, if I’m being honest, what I’m doing with you right now — talking about a man whom I could not admire more — feels more like a privilege on my part. I have to go back to London in a few days to shoot the Sherlock Christmas special — that’s work! This is practically like a holiday.”

The gentleman he’s referring to is Alan Turing, the subject of The Imitation Game and, until recently, a somewhat controversial figure in the U.K. Hired by the government’s intelligence agency in the 1940s, Turing was a cryptanalyst who ended up pioneering computer programming and helped the Allies win the war by cracking the enigma code. He was also a homosexual during a time in Britain when such things were deemed a felony, however, and as the film recounts, he was forced to endure “chemical castration” treatments after being arrested in 1952. Despite the fact that Turing’s formerly classified work during WWII had been made public in the Eighties, the government did not publicly acknowledge and apologize for the barbaric treatment he received until 2009; he wasn’t officially pardoned for his “crime” until 2013.

The film is, in a way, both a celebration of Turing’s achievements and a correction to the fact that he’s never truly been given his due — something that continues to irk Cumberbatch. “Why is he not on bank notes?” the actor asks, his voice rising. “Why is he not on the covers of textbooks? Going into this, I knew a little bit about him. After I’d finished the film, I thought it was the criminal the whole world didn’t know everything about him.” When Cumberbatch received the script while shooting the Star Trek sequel (“It was like, 'Ah, English period war drama…this should be a nice change of pace from playing a genetically engineered, super-warrior baddie bad guy!’”), he remembered Turing’s name from the Hugh Whitemore play Breaking the Code, in which Derek Jacobi played the logician. He quickly learned, however, that there was more to him than simply cracking Enigma. “The man was funny, he was acerbic, he was awkward, he had an interesting early life that I’d had no idea about. From the moment I read that interview scene with Denniston [Charles Dance’s character], I thought okay, I’m in. I’d have done anything. If they hadn’t have cast me, I’d been willing to have just served tea on set.”

“It’s not every actor who can play a genius,” director Morten Tyldum says, and the Norwegian filmmaker (best known for his 2011 adaptation of Jo Nesbo’s Nordic-noir novel Headhunters) admits that Cumberbatch was essentially his only choice for the role. “Watch his eyes: You can always see something going on behind them. He always had questions, like 'How does a mind that’s going in 1o different directions at once work? How does one have a conversation with somebody and show that it’s engaged while figuring out how to crack a code at the same time?’” Once Benedict started researching Turing, poring through writings on him and talking to his colleagues and relatives, he claims that two anecdotes helped him get him handle on who Turing was.

“His nieces told me that Alan used to play chess with his back to the board,” Cumberbatch says, laughing. “An opponent would go 'Bishop to Rook Four’ or whatever, and he could countermove without having to look. He kept the entire game in his head! The other bit came from something a coworker said, after Alan had been in 'treatment’ for longer than he should have been. The court had never taken the implant in his hip out, and his response was, 'Well, that’s not really cricket, is it?’ He’d had this horrible injustice done to him, and he just made a joke of it. Then, later that day, Alan apparently went home and tried to remove the thing himself with a knife and was found passed out in his apartment.” There’s a momentary silence on the other end of the line. “The man started to come into focus for me after that.”

Though Cumberbatch has played his share of real-life figures, from The Fifth Estate’s Julian Assange to Stephen Hawking (in the 2004 TV movie Hawking, a fact that’s delighted Oscar pundits as the actor competes against The Theory of Everything’s Eddie Redmayne for a statuette), he says its no more or less of a challenge than taking on an iconic role — like Sherlock Holmes or, as he’s slated to do in the near future, the Marvel superhero Dr. Strange. “You certainly feel a responsibility for protecting someone’s legacy,” he admits. “But I also feel a responsibility to those who have expectations that go beyond what you bring to a role. You’re delivering something to a fan base that comes to something with preconceived notions, and you know you can’t satisfy everyone — you’d go mad if you tried. It will never be the Sherlock or the Khan they have in their head. So you do what you can do.”

As for those rapid fans — the ones known by a certain nickname — who come to his work for less than prurient reasons, he says finds the attention “completely flattering” even if the seemingly overnight success of it all initially struck him as somewhat bewildering. “The trickiest thing about navigating fame, for lack of a better word,” Cumberbatch says, “is not being able to give everybody the time and interaction they want. I’ve always been sensitive to social situations, and you never want to feel like you’re letting anyone down. Or that you don’t seem to be grateful for all the attention you’re getting.” What sounds like a giggle suddenly materializes over the phone. “Or that you think someone recognizes you when, in fact, they don’t. I’ve made that mistake more than once. When that happens, no matter how many people are yelling your name, it’s humbling, believe me.”

Suddenly, a publicist is telling Benedict he has to go, as his car pulls up at his destination. “Well, time to 'campaign,’ as you say,” he proclaims, laughing, and then he’s off.

So I was at the Sherlock screening...

Please, please, please, don’t read under the cut if you don’t want me to affect your mood. I promise, I PROMISE, I’m not here to troll, I’m not here to mislead. The thing is that I went there fully convinced to keep whatever secret they were willing to share but now I’m not sure I’m on their side anymore. So, you’ve been warned.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I don't even know what to say at this point. For months upon months the only thing holding me out of my depression was Sherlock and now this shit is happened and when the episode ended I could feel every bit of it flooding back inside me. I feel empty but I'm crying and I don't want to live anymore. I'm so sorry, this is stupid. Sherlock is all I had and now. I'm drowning.

there’s nothing i can say to this that would do justice to how deeply i feel for you right now. we’re in this together. if sherlock isn’t the show we thought it was, it means that what we actually loved was not something we were simply seeing, but something we created together, and that wasn’t lost with this episode. we still have ourselves, our minds, our creativity and our drive. if sherlock does end up being this bad in the end, the things that were good about it have always been us, and we haven’t lost that. you haven’t lost that. please, remember this

The Coffin.

It said “I LOVE YOU” on the lid.  A coffin, the biggest symbol of death.  It was their way of killing what we wanted.  And Sherlock smashed it out of anger – the anger we’re all feeling right now – and slumped in defeat.  But then John reached out his hand to Sherlock; he picked him up, and they continued onward.

That’s us, my friends.  

TJLC is not dead.  Johnlock is not dead.  Just because Mofftiss killed our chance at having blatant representation onscreen does not mean it can never happen.  We pick each other up and continue forward.  We take Parentlock and run with it because we did get that.  We take John and Sherlock rebuilding their home and making a life together there and we run with it.  We can even take Mary saying that they belong together, the Baker Street Boys, and we run with it.  Love doesn’t have to be spoken words.  It can be through actions.  And John and Sherlock have shown us how much they love each other, over and over, and continue to do so by staying together.    

anonymous asked:

I'm sorry to disagree but I think Greg would be Sherlock's Best Man (and Sherlock would be adorable and call him Garfield or something all through the wedding day, except right before his speech, when he would say "And now my dear friend Greg") and Mike would be John's and he would reveal that when they were younger John once told him that he dreamed of marrying someone who made him feel that life was an adventure and Mike would end his speech with "Look, John, you did".

alsklskslklslskslks no but imagine sherlock asking mike to be his best man and mike is like “(long pause) sherlock, are you okay?” and sherlock rolls his eyes and mike goes on, “no, i know you are, but… seriously? me? your best man?… care to elaborate?” and sherlock is a sweet sweet child and just says with the cutest expression “well, it’s all thanks to you. that i met the love of my life, it is. you made it possible and i couldn’t be more thankful, so i thought… it would be appropriate.” and mike nearly tears up