she-left-me

Irreplaceable

“Irreplaceable”

I lost something very valuable to me.
Something irreplaceable; a certain kind of key,
With ridges used for a specific kind of lock,
Stitched and attached to a specific kind of box.
A brown-wooden chest in my attic to be precise .
I had tried every other key at least once or twice.
What kills me is the value contained inside.
A memento from my deceased grandmother left behind.

She told me while dying slowly in her bed,
She had something special but wanted to wait instead,
Until she was gone so that when I opened the chest,
What was inside could help put my mind to rest,
But I had lost the key and to make matters worse,
This chest is older than any remedy or curse.

I asked around town but nowhere complacent,
Was a locksmith capable of forging replacements.
They told me they don’t make keys like that anymore,
As if my problems to them seemed like such a chore.
You can only imagine the anger that I bestowed,
Wanting to let go but so desiring to know,
What exactly it was that was inside that chest.
What did she mean by put my mind to rest?

I checked in the house every crack and nook.
I questioned everyone for maybe that key they took.
And I forsook my daily routines; all for that key.
I was going to get to the bottom of this mystery!
So one night with a hacksaw and blade,
I smashed and ripped; O the mess I had made!
Little fragments of wood all over the place,
But I could not open the chest for Heaven’s sake.

This chest was more stubborn than my grandmother herself.
Clearly it cared not about the feelings I felt.
It refused to open through buzz saw and fire.
I had to douse the flames before they had risen higher.
It was almost comical but dumbfounded me,
As if this chest was magical or belonged to royalty.
When I picked up the chest what I found to be absurd.
There wasn’t a noise when I shook it; at least none to be heard.

Its been two years now since my grandmother died,
And this chest left behind I don’t know what’s inside.
So I finally did the only thing for myself to be saved.
I buried the chest next to my grandmother’s grave.
And to this day I myself can never forgive,
Nor forget the days when my grandmother lived.
And what kills me the most and this is no joke,
I’ll always remember the words my grandmother spoke:
“There is a key that I have that opens a chest,”
And what is inside could help put your mind to rest.”
I can’t help but feel guilty for a key that’s not traceable,
But even worse I lost something irreplaceable.

my mum crashed at my place last night and left before I woke up, and she left me a note that just said “Sink’s blocked again, good luck with that.”

Thank.

Hi, I’m Olivia I’m 13 and 7th grade.
I grew up in a broken home my dad screamed and threw stuff when he’s drunk. My mother took it BC she loves him. He called me fat and worthless when I was eight. I was bullied all through grade school.. I was always self Conscious.
When I was in 6th grade I got depression and social anxiety. I told my mom. I got no help. I started cutting the weeks after easter 2014. I told my mom I had depression again. I hot no help. I met a friend. Sara. She saved me, listened and was as weird as I was. Then I started 7th grade. Sara was in a grade ahead of me. She left me for new friends. I had nobody. I spiraled into a twister of depression. Cutting, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and an attempt. I told my mom I cut. I got NO help.
I was alone
I was scared
I was broken.
Buy I always smïlëd 😁
Near the end of the year (now) I realized I’m. Bisexual.
I’m Christian so I feel guilty and sinful. Imhabe slowly but surly getting an ED called UED. I have obsessions about calories one day, starve one day, and purge the next.
No one knows my full story. All they know is the sweet act I play.
So. I am emotionally abused. Bullied.
I have severe depression, social anxiety, self harm, suicidal thoughts, and UED ( unidentified eating disorder)
That’s my story.

has this been done yet?

  • me:*annoys my whole family bc not shutting up about how hot luke is*
  • stepdad:jesus ok so what would you have done if you had met him in munich and he grabbed your butt or something?!
  • me:what, i don't know, i'd have to be in a situation like that to know
  • mum:*yelling from the other room* WHY ARE YOU ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS, OF COURSE SHE'D JUMP ON HIM
  • stepdad:*leans through the door into the other room* what did you say?
  • mum:YOU'RE BEING SILLY, OF COURSE SHE WOULD JUMP ON HIM SHE'S NOT STUPID TO MISS THAT CHANCE, IF BONO (from u2 —> she's a huge fan) GRABBED MY BUTT I'D DIVORCE YOU THE SAME DAY