she-left-me

“She needed people around us and I didn’t understand that. I was locked on the two of us. There was a Russian writer who wrote: ‘I hated the world so that I could love you more.’ And that was me. I stopped talking to my old friends. I stopped spending time with people from work. And I wanted her to do the same. I was jealous, maybe. She was much younger than me so that made me feel insecure. I don’t think I wasn’t being mean. I was just asking her not to go to work parties. She left me 258 days ago. We’d just come back from a holiday by the sea, and everything seemed fine. It was just like always. We were swimming, drinking wine, going to cafes. I had no idea it was coming. One morning we were having coffee in the kitchen, and she said: ‘I don’t love you anymore.’ It was two months straight of drinking vodka after that. I lost thirty pounds. Only now is the wound starting to heal. I’m getting used to being lonely.”

(Moscow, Russia)

It’s not that I don’t love you it’s the sound of glass shattering and my mom drunkenly stumbling into my room face dripping crimson leaving the floor a vast sea of blood and it’s the nasty names falling from my father mouth and tears falling from my mothers eyes and the bruises littering her body and the blood, so much fucking blood.

It’s not that I don’t love you it’s the time my older sisters boyfriend broke up with her and she didn’t leave her room for six days because getting out of bed was just too much, she nearly went to the hospital on day six, I think he took her will to live with him when he left her.

It’s not that I don’t love you it’s the week my best friend spent at the mental hospital because her girlfriend fucked her ex. They think she was trying to end her life but I think she was trying to fill the hole in her heart with a bottle of prescription pills, I spent the next month watching her break her teeth on cheap liquor bottles and turning her body into a canvas with a twist, you see the paint was red and the canvas was her wrist.

It’s not that I don’t love you it’s that when the first boy I fell in love with told me he never loved me I chased two bottles of pills with some liquor and spent the night throwing up everything inside me but my love for him, a week later the “nice” lady at the mental hospital asked me why I wanted to die, I told her I didn’t want to die at all I just wanted to feel something other than the pain of him leaving.

It’s not that I don’t love you it’s that time I got a call from the ICU because my cousin was in a coma, the doctors told me they had to shock his heart to bring him back, when he was finally stable and could have visitors he told me she left him so he tied off his arm and shoved a needle into his veins because somehow that hurt less than the knife she shoved in his back when she left him.

It’s not that I don’t love you it’s that I do…

—  it’s not that i don’t love you /// trippyvibes1969 (inspired by extrasad)
I’ll Keep You Safe // A Stiles Stilinski AU

Collab with @sarcasticallystilinski

Prompt: What if you had a countdown on your arm telling you exactly who you’re going to lose next?

Relationship: Stiles Stilinski x Reader

Warnings: NSFW, Explicit Sexual Content, Smut, Oral (Male on Female), Virginity Loss, Skinny Dipping, Swearing, and So much fucking angst. Make sure you have tissues ready. 

Word Count: 12,271 

Song: I’ll Keep You Safe by Sleeping At Last

A/N: This is without a doubt one of the best fics Hayley and I have ever written. Not just as a collab, but amongst our own works as well. We are both so fucking in love with this story and I hope you guys love it as much as we do. Words cannot explain how amazing and beautiful this fic is to me.

If you are the kind of person who enjoys reading bubbly love stories with happy endings than I must advice you now that this story is not one of those. Because I am about to tell you the story of two lovers so addicted to each other and so connected to the other that they cheated death itself — only to be struck by another wave of agonizing tragedy instead.

Y/N Y/L/N and Stiles Stilinski were the two greatest lovers time and the universe have ever witnessed… and that drove them insane. Jealousy taking over both of their features, the universe did everything it could to separate the two until finally time found a vicious way to win. How could they have known a force so much stronger and so much darker than the incredible love they shared had begun to take over?

It didn’t matter how hard they tried to fight back nor how much they begged time for mercy, their destinies were already paved. All they could do was accept its path and believe in the quote life had beautifully taught them:

The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.

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The Serpent And The Cheerleader| Sweet Pea x Reader

Pairing- Sweet Pea x Reader

Warnings: Some Swearing But Not That Bad Also light angst but major fluff though like marshmallow level. 

Genre: Slight Angst And Major Fluff

Fandom: Riverdale

Summary: Reader And Sweet Pea Have A Secret Relationship, The Reader Being From The North Side, While he’s a South Sider. And to top it off, Shes A Cheerleader And He’s A Serpent, Both From Totally Different Worlds. After A Long Stressful practice for the River Vixens, Reader goes home where she learns that her relationship..Might not stay hidden. As emotions come crashing down on her, she calls her favourite Serpent and has a heart to heart.

Parts: Two

Authors Note: Should this get a part two? I’m not quite sure honestly, Maybe if this gets support i’ll write up a part two? Also this isn’t the best and I apologize. Quick note as well, I Head cannon that Sweet Pea is a total softie for whoever he is dating. I will take this to my grave and fight anyone. Also my requests are open.

-The (L/N) family, a family known throughout the town of Riverdale. The Mother and Father of the family being high school sweethearts that ended up tying the knot. Not only that, but they were highly respected in the community due to them having ties with publishers and business men. But like any other family in Riverdale, They weren’t the perfect family they were thought to be behind doors. But this story isn’t about the parent’s. Its about their River Vixen Gem of a daughter, (Y/N) (L/N).


A deep sigh left my body as I made my way through the crowded hallways, attempting to get home quickly. Practice for the River Vixens had ended early due to the paranoia from the recent events by someone called the black hood. I must have spaced out, because I was brought back to reality by the red haired bombshell, Cheryl Blossom.

“Did you even hear me? Ugh, Anyways I said practice is tomorrow at the same time.” she said to me as she walked beside me, still clad in her uniform as I was as well. I gave a meek nod to her as we went out the door’s of the school and into the cold. The red head came to a pause, turning to me and giving me a small kiss on the cheek and a small hug. “I’ll text you later stay safe, see you tomorrow dearie.” she said as she walked away quickly, leaving me alone.

After a twenty minute walk, I made it home. I quickly scaled the steps and went into my house. I was met with a sight that made me take a shaky deep breath. There sat my mother with her arms crossed, in front of her on the table laid a pile of clothes that obviously weren’t apart of my wardrobe as I wore lighter colors while the clothing was mostly black. She gave me a look as she raised an eyebrow while leaning forward.

“What are these?” Her shrill voice rang out through the room. I felt myself begin to sweat with anxiety, as I took a deep breath. “Oh..those are some friend’s clothes that they let me borrow. I’ve been meaning to return them, it completely slipped my mind.” I gave a fake smile towards my mother as I tightened my grip on my backpack strap. Her gaze turned cold as she stood up, grabbing the pile of clothes.

She quickly walked forward, slamming the pile into my chest as I fumbled to catch it. “Dinner is an hour. Your father will be joining us.” Was all she said as she brushed past me and went into the kitchen. I stood there for a few seconds frozen, before stiffly making my way upstairs towards my bedroom.

I quickly scaled the steps and went into my bedroom, making sure to close it behind me. I changed out of uniform and into a sweater and leggings, Making sure to hang up my uniform. I tossed the pile of clothing that my mother had found into my laundry bin, making sure to hide it along with some of my own laundry.

I sat down on my bed as I fished my phone out of my backpack. I quickly unlocked it and scrolled through my contacts until I found a certain one, I paused for a second before dialing and holding my phone to my ear. I listened as the line buzzed, waiting for the person on the other side to pick up. A click was heard before someone spoke up, “Hello?”

I felt my heart speed up as my emotions started to pour out, “Sweet Pea, My mom I think she knows. What if my dad knows?” I Choked out, feeling tears fill my eyes. I heard the male on the line mumble a few swears before giving a sigh “Calm down babe..its gonna be alright, trust me. Take a deep breath and tell me what make’s you think she knows.”

Just hearing his voice seemed to calm my nerves as I took a deep breath, like instructed. “Well for starters, while I was at school she went through my room! shes always been obsessive over my life but shes never went this far. She must have dug deep because she found some clothes that you left here. She ambushed me when I got home.” I said, my voice shaking. “What did you tell her?” He softly asked me. “I told her that the clothes were just some a friend let me borrow.” I whispered out.

It was quiet on the line for a few seconds. “what will happen if your parent’s find out? You always avoid telling me every time I ask. I Know they wont be pleased but tell me what would they do?” Sweet Pea’s Voice was firm and clear, even on the phone he seemed intimidating but I felt comforted by his voice rather than scared or shaken.

“They’ll try to keep us apart, hell they might even try to send me away. They’ll either be ashamed and try to hide our relationship or they’ll tell the entire town. They’ll definitely try to make me ashamed to be seen with you but that will never happen. I love you and rather be with you than some asshole Jock from my school with an over obsessed personality.” I whispered the final part, fearing someone might be listening in.

I heard the male on the line give a small chuckle, making my heartbeat begin to race and my face become warm. “And I love you to Princess, despite what anyone says and whatever happens.” A comforting silence filled the line after he said this. “Can I still come over tonight to crash?”

I let out a small laugh “Your always welcomed. I enjoy your company and having someone to rant to that actually listens.” The male gave a small hum, clearing his throat. “I’ll come over at like eight or nine, please don’t leave me in the cold like last Saturday.”

A fake offended gasp leaves me “You didn’t knock on my window or anything. Or even text me. How was I supposed to know that you were outside?” He clicks his tongue “Well I don’t know..this is just a suggestion, Maybe look out the window sometimes?”

I fall into a fit of giggles, the male on the line giving a small laugh as well. “Shit, Baby I have to go. I would love to talk more but duty calls.” By his tone, he sounds disappointed. “that’s fine sweets, I love you stay safe.” I softly say, feeling my face become hot once more despite saying this multiple times. “Love you to, see you later tonight” A click rang out, notifying me that he had hung up.

I held my phone to my chest, waiting for my face to cool down. Despite being in a relationship with the male for three months, Still the smallest things made me flustered. Once my face cooled down and the butterflies in my stomach disappeared, I tossed my phone onto my bed and stretched.

My door was thrown open, My mother standing there with a sour expression stitched onto her face. “Dinner’s Ready. Your father is waiting downstairs.” she sharply said as she swiftly turned around and went storming down the stairs. I took a deep breath before leaving my room and going downstairs into the dinning room.

There sat my mother at one end of the table and at the other my father, who wore a more blank expression unlike my mother who looked ready to smash something. The table was set with plates and silverware along with Dinner, Pasta and salad with bread sticks. My father made a small hand motion. “Take a seat, we need to talk about a few things.” I felt my stomach drop and fear imprison me once more as my fathers voice rang out through the dinning room.

His Voice Was Sharp And Held Tones Of Anger 

Jimin’s runaway daughter. pt.3

Jimin’s DaughterAU!

Genre: Angst

[pt.1] [pt.2] [pt.3] [pt.4] [pt.5 Finale]

Warning: Sensitive Content (mentions of abuse; read at own risk)


Originally posted by jeonyween

Dad went to work early this morning and so did mum, I was left alone in the house and I was actually glad to be by myself - with no one else around me. Now, I wouldn’t mind if it were dad keeping me company, but his schedules were always so full that it was rare for me to be home with him and only him. Usually, it’d be mum and I here - she’d finish work at your regular five o’clock and be home by six. That’s the time I dreaded the most, nothing’s worse than being home with her, alone. Dad never gets back until late, if he even bothers returning at all for the night. Sometime’s he’d practice until ungodly hours and just end up staying with his members at the dorm because he didn’t want to come back at four in the morning and wake us all up. I’d see him less during comeback times because he’d be so busy, not that he’s not busy near enough all year round but I could end up going days without seeing him because he just couldn’t find the time to stay at home. For that, I missed him a lot and that was also the reason why he would never believe me when I say that mum hates me.

Sometimes it’d get really lonely, I’m homeschooled because my mother decided it was best for me to stay and learn from home so that I wouldn’t attract unnecessary attention that could damage dad’s reputation, but really she only started keeping me away from the outside world when she started beating me, the real reason why she doesn’t want me out there was because of the injuries I would have, which would of course attract attention. My mother was awful, but I can’t deny that she’s smart. She’d only hit me if she knew dad wasn’t coming up that night, so she doesn’t end up risking being caught.

The dreaded time of day was inching closer and closer by the second, mum was going to be home any minute now and it’d be the first time I was alone with her since running away yesterday. I remembered her words, or more so ‘threats’ so clearly, the amount of venom I felt from her voice surprised me because I didn’t die then and there after she had whispered in my ear. She beats me so badly, sometimes I wonder why she doesn’t just kill me altogether. Why she doesn’t just take out a knife from the kitchen drawer and aim it directly at my heart. I assume that the pain the knife would bring, would be easier to handle than the constant punches, the kicks, the hair pulling and the scratches. Because the aftermath of her beatings are mentally traumatising, but if she killed me with a knife, I’d be dead and wouldn’t even have to think about anything else after. If you can’t tell already, I’m obviously an optimistic person - please note my sarcasm. I used to be a bright child, people always thought I was a smaller version of my dad because of how much of a ‘sunshine’ I was, knowing that my father was part of the sunshine line of BTS. But when the day came where my mother told me she no longer loved me, I knew I had changed.

I was currently in the kitchen, cutting up some onions for tonight’s dinner as I heard my mum walk through the front door, with a few clicks of her heels as she took her shoes off to heavy footsteps coming my way. I held my breath as I heard her come closer, tears already brimming my eyes because I was so petrified of her.

“I’m home, bitch.” I turned slowly and faced her, but not once could I look her in the eyes, I was simply too afraid to do so. “I get back and you don’t even know how to greet me, did I not teach you your manners? Is this how it is after you’ve called me a bitch in front of your dad?” She taunted me, she knew very well where my breaking points were - because she’s my mother of course she’d know, and that’s what always gives her the upper hand.

“Welcome home mum.” I say as I placed the knife down on the side of the cutting board, walking over to her to greet her properly. I didn’t need her to tell dad that I was now being rude to her, she probably would anyway, but I didn’t want to risk the little chance I had of him even believing me.

I felt my cheek sting, she slapped me across my face and as I looked up at her - she showed no remorse. Instead, the devilish smile she wore tainted my life. It was an image that’d cause me to wake up because it haunted me in my nightmares, something that was so mentally scarring and no matter what it is I tried to do, or how hard I tried to remove that image, I couldn’t.

“Does it hurt, my child? I hope it does. I told you you’d be punished for what you’ve done, and here’s your punishment right now. You told your dad everything didn’t you? That I abuse you, that I don’t love you? It’s just too bad he’ll never believe you, isn’t it?” She hit my head after every single question she asked, her force stronger with every hit but I couldn’t retaliate. She kicked the back of my legs, causing me to tumble forwards. My knees hit the ground as I yelped.

“Don’t think for a second that you’re going to get away with this. Don’t bother screaming either, because no one will help you. Not even your own dad believes in your words and he’s not going to come home any time soon, so it’s just going to be me and you. Like the good old times, where I get to take my anger out on you because you’ve been a terrible daughter, and you can enjoy it.”

Her words didn’t quite end there, as she would beat me she would yell nasty names at me. Call me a useless child that she wish she would have aborted years ago. A child she shouldn’t have had, that dad doesn’t love me, that he’s only doing this because the fans would question him if anything would have ever happened to me. I didn’t want to believe in her words, but it made sense. Everything made sense. When she got tired, she left me there as she continued to finish off the cooking I had left. Was she mentally sane? I doubted her sanity, but then again - I was doubting my own. Knowing that she was done with me, I struggled my way into my room locking the door behind me. I looked at myself in the mirror, I saw all the cuts and bruises forming as I cried at my ugly self. Her beatings no longer hurt, like people would say - if something happens so much and so often, it becomes a regular routine that your body just gets use to and for me, the abuse was the regular routine that my body was accommodated to. The closer I looked at the injuries, the more I’m convinced that my mother was smart. All the areas that were hurt, they looked like injuries I would get from falling. She knew exactly what she was doing, and that was something I was afraid of. Because it’ll always be her word against mine, and nobody would listen to a child. A child who has a wild imagination like me.


pt.4?

Six Nights (Stiles Stilinski imagine)

Prompt: “We live on the same floor and the dorm between ours always has REALLY loud sex so now we’re both in the main lounge at two am do you want this last bite of ice cream?” aka the college AU that grew legs and went for a walk. 

Warnings: only a few minor curses

Word Count: 5k

A/N: University AUs are a favourite of mine and this prompt was too good to ignore. It was supposed to be short, but as you can see, I got a little carried away… I hope you like it! :)

(Allison is alive because fuck Jeff Davis.)

Originally posted by ohsadagnes

NIGHT ONE

The first night, you were woken by the sound of a headboard banging against a wall. You tried turning over and burying your head in the pillows, but the loud noise just persisted until you were left completely conscious.

Groaning, you sat up. After glancing at your phone and discovering it was only a little after 1am, you swung your legs from the bed and pulled on a large hoodie. You debated knocking on your neighbour’s apartment, but decided against it - just because you weren’t getting any, it didn’t mean you had to ruin their fun.

After slipping on a pair of shoes, you grabbed your laptop and decided to go for a little walk. As tempting as staying in bed sounded, you really didn’t want to have to listen to your neighbours having sex, and there were other things you could be doing.

The corridors were desolate, students behind each closed door, undoubtedly busy with things like sleeping or studying. Seeing as your dorm building had a communal lounge, you headed in that direction and quickly set up camp at a small table in the back corner. You dumped your laptop on the desk and made use of the drinks machine to fix yourself up with a hot chocolate before going back at your table and beginning to browse the internet.

You didn’t have a plan, per say, but reckoned your neighbour wouldn’t take more than half an hour to…finish. You would just stay in the lounge for that long, reply to a few emails, scroll through out-dated social media, relax. You’d had a busy week and having a little time to catch up online didn’t sound so bad.

As time began to slip by, you became less and less aware of those around you. The night grew darker and the lounge grew quieter, people draining out until you were almost completely alone.

Absorbed in your laptop’s luminescent screen, you gasped loudly when a photo of one of your friends getting proposed to appeared on your feed, completely unable to contain the surprised exclamation. You slammed the mug on the table, pulling out your phone and immediately going to call her. You couldn’t believe she’d forgotten to tell you - you’d known Allison for years, and she’d just, what? forgotten to inform you of her engagement? It was completely unacceptable.

“Answer, goddamnit!” You growled, glaring at your phone when it went straight to voicemail. You were beginning to construct an angry - yet supportive - text message when a voice cut through the air.

“Y’know, people don’t normally answer their phones at,” the stranger paused, presumably checking the time, “2am.”

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Taehyung’s runaway daughter. part2

Taehyung’s daughterAU! 

Genre: Angst

[part1] [part2] [part3] [part4End]


Originally posted by blackandwhitebangtan

Neither of my parents wanted me, my mum found someone new and forgot about us. I hurt my dad’s feelings and now even he hates me. My phone battery is now completely dead. I have no money, no nothing and top of that, I was lost. I walked for miles and ended up somewhere unknown, somewhere I’ve never been before. I’ve been walking for at least six hours. I lost count after my phone had died but I guess it’s for the best. 

I couldn’t reach my so called mother, she blocked my number and I’m not even surprised, she didn’t want me, she left me, me and dad and I couldn’t reach my father who loved me, because his phone was switched off, I couldn’t find a way to communicate with anyone, there’s no one out here. I don’t know how to get home. Not that I even have one to go to anymore. I just kept walking. It was dark outside and there’s not a single street lamp to light the world around me and I somehow ended up in the middle of the woods, it was so quiet I could hear the crickets in the background. I was cold, hungry and tired. Was I just going to die here? Rot away before anyone could even find my remains? Those thoughts clouded my mind, I may seem dramatic but wouldn’t you feel this way if you’re miles away from home and no longer have parents to turn to, or when you’re stuck in this situation, wouldn’t these endless thoughts flood your mind and distort your judgement? 

I sat against a tree and pulled my knees to my chest, I started to cry. I felt like such a pathetic child right now but I didn’t want to die, I didn’t want to die before telling dad that I was sorry. But I don’t have parents anymore, do I? I have neither parents or a home. So maybe it’s not even worth living anymore, who would care if I was taken by a wild beast in this dark forest? Nobody. Nobody would care and nobody would know. 

No, dad will. I know he will, right? He said he loves me. But does he? He told me not to go home, that I can’t. It’s like I had the devil and angel on my shoulders telling me different things. I didn’t want to let the devil win, but it did. The dark thoughts loomed over me, dad wouldn’t care if I were dead or alive, he switched his phone off to avoid my messages and no matter how hard I tried to contact him while I still could, I was only met with a silent phone. But that’s my own fault. I should have believed him, but I was stupid enough to believe a lying cheat. She told me she would always love me, that she would always love dad. But she didn’t and now because of her, I’m made a homeless orphan. Barely even 14 and I’ve been kicked out of my own home. I bet they’re partying right now, all of them. Dad must have hated being stuck with me, that’s why he got so mad when I didn’t believe him. Because it was bad enough that he had to take care of me, but I didn’t even listen to him and what he had to say. I’d get rid of me too if I could. It was getting really late and I know it because my body told me it was time to sleep and so that’s what I did, I fell asleep lying by the tree on top of a pile of fallen leaves, still cold, still hungry.

I woke up with beads of sweat on my forehead, shouting out for my dad. I was scared because I thought he had left me all alone. Until I realised, I wasn’t having a bad dream. I was living the nightmare I was having, realising it was now my reality. It was still kind of dark but I could tell that the sun was about to rise soon. I was hungry still and now even more thirsty than I am hungry and cold. If I don’t die by getting eaten by wolves, I’d die of thirst. But oh well. I don’t have anything to lose. 

He told me ‘don’t come back’ and I won’t. Because mum and I ruined his happiness and he doesn’t deserve that and because I have no idea how to get back, unlike Hansel, I wasn’t smart enough to leave a trail so that I could lead myself back home. Instead I walked, without even taking in my surroundings enough to recognise the direction I came from. My dad, he was a great father, and I was too stupid to appreciate it, instead I believed in those lies that cunning woman fed to me. But how could I not believe her, when she was my mother? Someone I saw practically 24/7 whereas I saw my dad a lot less than I did see my mum, he was always busy but he wasn’t lying when he said he tried his best to spend all the time he could with us. I believed the wrong person and that too, puts me in the wrong. How could I be so stupid? Stupid enough not to believe the person who didn’t leave me behind. I could only imagine the disappointment in his heart, and that hurts me. 

I got up from my spot and decided to walk, but only fell deeper into the forest. The sky was growing greyer by the minute and I could tell that it was going to rain soon, I was scared and alone and like the stupid child I am,I started crying again. But this time I wasn’t crying alone. The sky was crying with me, as if it felt pity for this young girl who’s alone in the deep dark forest, unable to find her way home. I kept on going, getting drenched by the heavy rain as I carried on taking more steps into the forest. I was hoping to find some kind of cabin to shelter myself from the rain, but this isn’t a children’s story. I wasn’t going to find a house made out of sweets and gingerbread, even then a house like that proved too good to be true. It was cold, my wet clothes clung onto my body but I managed to somewhat quench my thirst. Holding my palms out I collected the rain water and drank. I don’t think I’ve ever loved the rain so much in my life. 

But the rain got worse to the point where it was thundering and lightning, a storm was brewing and there’s nothing I hate more than thunder. The sound terrifies me, and every time I hear it I have to call dad to rescue me or I listen to his music to calm myself. But I couldn’t do either. So I just sat under a large tree that somewhat gave me a bit of shelter, crying again. The only things that went through my mind right now were. Was he thinking about me? Was he looking for me? Can he save me from this living nightmare? Will I ever see him again? 


part 3?

Honestly, if your parents told you that you couldn’t go home, how would you feel and how would you react?