she's telling a truth she learned for herself

Ok but I’ve been binge watching the Narnia movies again, after not having seen them for a long ass time, and now, being a little older and (hopefully) a little more mature than I was when I first saw them, I always feel physically sick when I see the Pevensies being children after The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe because they just aren’t anymore and I can’t even begin to imagine what it must be like, to grow up as kings and queens, respected and important, and full of duty, only to go back to being 8 years old (in Lucy’s case).

They didn’t remember England, or the wardrobe, or their old lives, they were Narnians and they were pushed back, not only into a world that was bound to make them miserable, but also into bodies that couldn’t reflect what they’d been through.

Just imagine Peter, waking up in the morning, not remembering that he isn’t the Magnificent anymore, imagine him subconsciously reaching for something to trim his beard, only to remember that it isn’t there anymore, to expect old battle wounds to hurt until he realises that they can’t because he doesn’t have them.

Or Edmund, who left England a stubborn selfish little boy who only wanted his mummy back, and came back the Just, the redeemed traitor, the diplomat, the man, having to resort to being ten years old and probably not even allowed to peek at a newspaper because he’s just a child after all. He plays chess, incredibly well, he doesn’t mock his siblings anymore and all the friends he knew when he was still a boy are either irritated at his behaviour or too childish, too selfish for somebody who knows very well just what selfishness can do, who has a part of the White Witch in him, always.

Susan forgets, we all know that. She must’ve lain awake at night, remembering just what it felt like to cover pain and viciousness and gore with a smile and a blush, remembering being the Gentle, but never in war. She must’ve cried for all the lost years, for all that she learnt and that she can never forget, for all that she has accomplished, that will bring her nothing in this world that doesn’t feel like hers. So she sits down in front of a mirror, talks herself out of believing, telling herself that it wasn’t real, that it was just a dream, that this Narnia her siblings talk about is nothing but a game.
The truth is too terrifying, to devastating to face.

Lucy, little Lucy, who grew up under Mr Tumnus’ smiles and Aslan’s approving gaze, who was loved by all, who did learn how to rule, how to negotiate but who never forgot just what it means to be a queen of Narnia, this girl who matured into a woman, who had a woman’s mind and body and a queen’s grace, she who they called the Valiant, the lion’s daughter, she shrank into herself, into a child, younger than even her siblings. She remembers, clearest of them all, she is the only one who still knows Mr Tumnus’ face, still knows Aslan, but she is just a girl, a pretty little thing who will never be the queen she was, who will never be the woman she was because queenship forms a person in ways no schools can.

They must’ve been devastated when they tumbled to the floor, short and small, and there’s a war they have no control over and Lucy is small, Edmund is skinny, so skinny and Peter and Susan have lost their glow and they’ve changed, they’ve changed so much. (The first time, somebody calls them by just their names, they feel invalidated and small. And offended. They’re kings and queens, they’ve earned their titles and now they have to sit in a dim room filled with children and listen to teachers, have to allow themselves to be insignificant and nothing more than what they were when Lucy first stepped into Narnia - frightened children in the middle of a war they wish was never there in the first place)

The show needs to stop using L/xa to prop up Clarke and her leadership skills. Clarke was a better leader BEFORE L/xa. L/xa told Clarke to change everything about herself that made her a good leader (her love for her friends) and when she shut herself off from that in s3 she was a bad leader.

I’m sorry but what Clarke did tonight, sacrificing herself, is something L/xa would not have done. It wasn’t her leadership style so L/xa didn’t shape her into that. 

What she did tonight was something that she more likely learned from her FATHER. The person who chose to try to tell his people the truth to save them, even if it cost him his life. And she choose to be the test subject to save her people, even if it cost her HER life.

This isn’t even me hating on L/xa’s character. Just how they are acting like her character shaped Clarke into he person she is today. Like she wasn’t that person before L/xa. Clarke came down to Earth taking charge and being a leader. The show needs to stop erasing that.


keith and allura + growing stronger by letting go of the past

since i have yet to find another post that goes into detail about just how much keith’s arc in ‘the blade of marmora’ and allura’s arc in ‘crystal venom’ parallel one another, i went ahead and did the thing myself !! i find it both curious and kinda enchanting how alike keith and allura are in so many respects. realizing these similarities while re-watching the show was far too riveting not to share my thoughts, so here they are ^^

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Amelia (Part 1 of 3)


Pairing: Lin-Manuel x Reader

Summary: You technically met Amy first.

Note: Untitled Garbage Mystery Fic is no longer Untitled or a Mystery!

Okay, so this was initially gonna be a small thing and then it kinda got away from me so it’s a slightly less small thing? I basically needed to write something that wasn’t academic for once in my life and then this happened (with a great deal of help from @fragmentofmymind who is the greatest and listens to me every time I hit a metaphorical writing speed bump)

It’s far from the best thing I’ve ever written but I’ve had fun in this universe so far (and hope you do too). Thanks for being patient with me, my dudes. I LOVE YOU LOTS.

Word Count: 11,336 (shout out to slow burn lmao)

There’s a quiet power in wielding a camera, a strength in the ability to either capture the world in its purest truth or manipulate it into something brand new. You had learned this at a young age, stealing your grandmother’s Polaroid camera and discovering how different the image you could create would look in different types of light and more or less motion, even if you didn’t fully understand why it worked the way that it did.

It became a part of you, filling your heart with a curiosity for telling stories through images. The photo you caught of your mother as she laughed quietly to herself in the kitchen, a snapshot of your best friend right at the moment she caught you taking it, a poorly framed photo you accidentally took of yourself while trying to change the roll of film.

It was all magical to you, and it never really stopped feeling like you’d tricked the universe into allowing such beauty to exist every time you snapped a one-of-a-kind photograph.

A camera is built out of complicated technology. The mechanics of focus and aperture, f-stops and shutter speed were more than science and math to you–they were your doorway into a new world, the look of which you got to decide.

Your hands felt most comfortable when stabilizing a camera, your eye most at home behind a viewfinder, your fingers their most graceful as you pulled focus to a new subject–

“Are you even listening to me?”

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Anne With an E: Anne Shirley [INFP]

OFFICIAL TYPING by Charity / the Mod

Introverted Feeling (Fi): Anne builds an instant, strong connection to Matthew that she describes as a “kindred spirit.” She “understands” him, through their shared quiet but intense affection for one another. Her emotions drive all her decisions, and Gilbert accuses her of making things “all about herself,” when she is actually trying to connect to him, through their shared loss. She can be melodramatic with her feelings, but keeps the most intense things to herself, until she learns she can trust Marilla with some of them (even then, she doesn’t talk about her abuse at the orphanage or in foster homes). She is incredibly kind, sensitive, and easily offended, but also has an “iron will.”

Extroverted Intuition (Ne): She self-entertains endlessly through stories, window friends, and dramatic re-interpretations of the world around her. Anne daydreams about climbing into a cheery tree if no one comes for her; she prefers to tell Marilla an invented tale about her marvelous parents, rather than the truth. She never does anything without a flourish. She admits that the white way of delight is “the only thing that cannot be improved on, by my imagination!” She has a dozen stories in her head all at the same time, and often shares these (abstract) details with her friends; they can’t think up a plot for a story? No problem, Anne has a vague idea they can use! She refuses to accept the world as it is; she has to put her own personal shine on it.

Introverted Sensing (Si): Her own experiences are very important to her, and Anne uses them to frame her expectations of reality; she comes to Green Gables terrified they won’t want or keep her, because others have ditched her in the past, due to her “ugly” red hair and freckles. She is overwhelmed with delight when the Cuthberts give her a sense of security, sameness, and permanence, by inviting her to sign the family Bible and become a real Cuthbert. Anne glowers on the train that, “Why are BAD memories so much harder to forget than good ones?” She spends several episodes flashing back to her traumatic experiences, triggered by similarities and emotional reactions in her environment. Her perception of how life was is sometimes naïve (Ne) and impressionistic (Si) rather than factual.

Extroverted Thinking (Te): Oh, boy. Anne has a temper. She insults Rachel Lynde in no uncertain terms. She screams at Gilbert to leave her alone. She doesn’t hesitate to slap down Marilla for her fake “good night,” at the end of her first night at Green Gables. Her Te bitch-slaps people all over the place. Since she is so young, she uses it mostly to assert her opinions… but while she IS very hard working at school, and smart enough to teach herself long division, she hasn’t quite mastered the art of not daydreaming yet and… you know, not setting the kitchen on fire.

Note: This is on Netflix now. It’s magnificent. Go watch it.

never stray

Hades and Persephone

(Y/N) looked out to the gloomy kingdom of Hell, trying to drown out the ghostly screams with her humming. The humming helped none though, as she could still hear the banshee-like shrieks over her own head voice. If it wasn’t for the King of the Underworld, (Y/N) would never be caught dead even in death in this Hell.

She hugged her arms around her body and turned from the balcony back into Hades’ temple; her home. The black marble clicked against her shoes and echoed down the vacant halls, reminding her of the loneliness and eeriness she faced when Harry wasn’t home. It was verging 20 days since she’s last seen him. When he was away, (Y/N) was strictly allowed to not leave the temple. Harry promised her that it was for her own protection yet, she stayed stir crazy there for the entirety of Fall and Winter.

A sudden clicking of the chamber doors tore (Y/N) from her thoughts, her heart beat picking up from the thought of her husband arriving home. She took silent steps towards the front and was met with the back of her husband’s curly head of hair.

Harry turned from the door and a smirk bloomed onto his face at the sight of his wife. He held his hand out, folding his fingers around hers and pulling her into his broad embrace.

“My lover.” Harry sighed, squeezing her closer to his heart. Harry’s heart didn’t beat but he swore it fluttered alive when she was in his arms, his little goddess of spring and rebirth.

“Give me a kiss.” He whispered, using his knuckles to tip her head up.

(Y/N) touched her hand to his jaw and closed her eyes, taking a breath before leaning her mouth onto his and puckering slightly. Harry seemed unhappy with the slowness of it, wrapping his arm around her waist and pressing his lips harder and while she was taken aback by the sudden eagerness of it, it wasn’t unwelcome. Every breath she took was stolen out from her lungs as Harry kissed her as if he hadn’t seen her for a thousand years. While he was rough he wasn’t forceful, for his hands stroked lovingly at her hips, fingering the material of her dress.

She pulled apart with her cheeks the color of peaches, Harry’s matching. (Y/N)’s lips tingled and she swore she would die with the memory of his mouth on hers.

“Where were you?” She asked, even though she knew it was pointless. Harry kept all of his godly business to himself, never sharing what was happening above the Underworld and quite literally leaving her in the dark. There could’ve been a war happening on Mount Olympus and she wouldn’t of known until it was over.

Harry shook his head, excusing her question. “I hope you were good while I was away?”

(Y/N) nodded, averting her eye contact to the ground. She had learned a long time ago that after Harry had kidnapped her from Demeter, escaping was pointless and her best bets was staying with him. She didn’t mind though.

Harry tilted his head and kept his eyes on her, thumbing her cherry colored lips. “Are you lying to me?”

(Y/N) tensed because no, she was genuinely telling the truth about behaving herself while he was gone. Harry must’ve felt her body harden because he suddenly laughed, pressing one chaste kiss to her cheekbone. “I’m playing, pet. I know you’re a good girl.”

With that Harry pulled away and started down the hall, turning into the very last room; their bedroom. It was one of the grandest rooms of the entire building, one (Y/N) spent the majority of her time at when Harry was gone. Much to her disliking, it was a dark room filled with minimal color. The bed sheets were black, the curtains black, the marble black. Nights when Harry took her from behind she felt as if she was spiraling in a black hole of ecstasy, Harry creating the stars before her own eyes.

She smoothed down the wrinkles on her dress and followed her husband’s footsteps into their bedroom, gasping when the sight of his naked body abruptly meeting her.

“I-I’m so sorry.” (Y/N) stuttered, looking down. “I didn’t realize you were changing.”

Harry laughed boyishly and strolled up to her, hugging their bodies together. “Silly girl, there’s no reason to be sorry.”

“I know but…” She wove off mid sentence as Harry had started to brush his fingers through her hair, making her sigh contently at the tickling, yet soothing sensation.

“If I wasn’t so tired from my travels I would have you singing underneath me. For tonight let’s just sleep.”

“Are you going to change?” She responded, splaying her hand out on his collarbones. (Y/N) had missed him much more than she had allowed herself to.

“I think,” He started with a smile, one that caused his dimples to poke out. “…the only person who should be changing is you. Out from your clothes.”

“I don’t sleep in the nude. Unlike you, I’m proper.” She teased, running her hands down Harry’s chest to his waist. Her hands never dipped lower than his V-lines but despite that, Harry’s hips surged closer to her own.

“You will tonight.” And with that, he swept (Y/N) from her feet and twirled her before falling onto the bed and wrestling her from her dress. The dark, gloomy room was filled with their laughs and shrieks, two sounds that differed so heavily from the moans and groans of the dead just beyond the gates.

If anyone had seen the two in that moment, without knowledge they would’ve looked like a young couple in love; not Hades and Persephone. This was a scene of love, of trust and the only time you would find the King of the Dead more alive than dead.

the commander’s choice

Nier:Automata has given me so much to think about!  Not the least of which being: what the hell was the Commander thinking when she set up the partnership between 2B and 9S?

ending c/d spoilers below

On the surface it seems like a pretty simple set-up.  

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When I have kids I’m going to tell them about the time Eva Kviig Mohn stood up for herself and confronted the boy she loved about his opinion meaning more than her own. I’m going to tell them how brave it was for her not to be ashamed to tell the truth about how she felt in a vulnerable point of her life; how she found the strenght she needed in healthy friendships and learned to love herself.

anonymous asked:

Have we talked about Dean's line, "What'd you let him talk to you like that?" Because I know people loved Dean's protectiveness which it was but it was also interesting because Cas doesn't let Dean talk to him like that. So I loved that it made us think about Cas' comfort with the Winchesters (Dean) and how he feels safe enough with them to fight right back. Whereas with the angels, he's not comfortable, he's not safe. He doesn't belong. We only fight back when we feel safe enough to do so.

Hi there, and yeah, I’ve seen a few gif sets of the line (and a few more of various crack takes on that whole conversation (HASHTAG MARRIED)), but I don’t think I’ve seen anyone tear the whole line down. So, let’s do that! :D

There was a lot of weight to that line, even just surrounding the circumstances leading up to it. It’s established right from the start of the episode that Dean and Cas have been giving each other the silent treatment for at least several days. Neither the Superwiki nor the episode itself give us an exact timeline, but I don’t think it can possibly have been more than a few days, since they open with discussing how busy Cas has been to have made the whole “Find Kelly” board, and the discussion about Mary leads us to believe that she just dropped them at home and went off hunting again, with Dean mentioning how “quick” she jumped back into it.

Regardless of timeline, Sam and Dean’s conversation establishes that it’s been a few days since they got home, and that Dean and Cas have been essentially giving each other the silent treatment for that entire time.

And the entirety of Sam and Dean’s talk about this is:

DEAN: I’m not pissed that he cares about us. You know, I’m… I’m grateful. But Billie said that there would be cosmic consequences if that deal got broken. You have any idea what that means?
SAM: No.
DEAN: Neither do I. But I’m pretty sure it ain’t jelly beans and g-strings.
SAM: My point is, Cas thought he was doing the right thing.
CAS: I was doing the right thing.
DEAN: You sure about that?
CAS: Yes.
DEAN: I’m not so sure. And what if the other shoe drops?
CAS: I’ll deal with it.

So we already know from this entire conversation that Dean’s only upset that Cas essentially took on the burden of their deal, that it seems like the “consequences” are now going to fall on HIM instead. And the consequences could potentially be worse than their original deal, because cosmic consequences (in the Winchesters’ history) have a tendency to escalate…

(interesting side note: while I’m typing this, I’ve got 7.03 on in the background, and in the scene where Dean kills Amy Pond he uses the same phrase, “Maybe in a year, maybe ten, but eventually the other shoe will drop. It always does.” Then he stabs her and says, “I’m sorry.” I just… there was already a parallel made between this scene and the scene at the end where Dean tells Lily Sunder that she’s done, but Cas tells her to come find him if she can’t forgive him. Okay. Sorry. Just thought that was interesting that the same “the other shoe” line was in that conversation above, putting the scene from 7.03 as bookends for the entirety of 12.10.)

(this is why I should probably turn off the tv while I’m answering questions. Digressions ahoy!)

So already we know that Dean’s not talking to Cas because he’s upset that Cas isn’t talking to him, essentially. When you boil the whole thing down to the simplest elements, Dean and Cas are BOTH pissed at EACH OTHER for trying to take the cosmic consequences on THEMSELVES, INDIVIDUALLY.

This is BOTH of them saying, “No it’s on me. I’m protecting you!” and the other replying, “Well, no, it’s on me. I’M protecting YOU!” And both of them trying to out-protect the other. I mean… married much?

*imagines an infinite loop of Dean and Cas stepping around each other to stand between the other and the nebulous future potential cosmic consequences and just laugh-cries forever*

But when there’s an actual physical and immediate threat, Dean’s ready to drop their tiff to stand shoulder to shoulder with Cas. Dean’s grumpy about the fact that Cas DOESN’T immediately allow him to stand with him against that threat, and the fact that Cas was ready to storm out of the bunker to face that threat alone.

I think that was the first time Dean realized that he and Cas weren’t on the same page here. That Cas might not have understood WHY Dean was so upset.

Yeah, Dean and Cas had been having a spat, but over the course of the episode, Dean and Cas BOTH get a clearer picture of what the other really needed to hear, and it clarified the DIFFERENCE between the way Dean was snapping at Cas (because he cares about him and is WORRIED for him and just wants Cas to let him HELP), and the reasons Ishim was snapping at Cas (because he’s an ASSHAT and ANGRY and bears a GRUDGE against Cas).

And now, Cas can see the difference.

But there’s also the fact that Cas was willing to take a bit of abuse from Ishim because they had history. Ishim had been his commander at one time, and Cas had taken orders from him. Cas also cared about Benjamin, and had said to Ishim that finding Benjamin’s killer was his primary goal, and so he was willing to take a little abuse for it.

And Dean sort of understood that line of reasoning. There’s a lot of abuse Dean would be willing to take on Castiel’s behalf, too. That’s one thing family does for each other, right?

Family might argue and get grumpy with each other, but when it’s time to take a stand against an external enemy, Family is supposed to drop their squabbles and face the enemy together, side by side, as a united front. Sorta like this:

When the first thing Cas was confronted with when walking into the Wright Spot to meet Ishim was this antagonistic scene:

Ishim and Mirabel, presenting an already divided front, with Ishim clearly looking confident, like he already knows he has the upper hand. Already it’s not about Benjamin, but Ishim is trying to make it about Castiel…

Cas doesn’t understand WHY Ishim might be angry about Cas’s involvement now (I mean, Cas doesn’t know yet that Ishim’s already on the defensive here, and is scrambling to keep the truth about Lily from coming out, so he gives him the benefit of the doubt, puts his issues aside for the greater good… until he DOES learn the difference.)

(I was just telling lizbob that I’ve been working on this ask for the last two hours because I keep getting distracted by 7.03, then 7.04, and now 7.05, because I am a sucker for extreme pain… and the parallels are SO RELEVANT to s12… and she directed me to this tangentially similar message she answered already, because she’s not letting herself get drowned in extreme Dean Feels like I’ve been all morning… so for compare/contrast, have her answer too:

Akko is most definitely a determinator, and the strength of a determinator is tied to their motivator. It can be anything that causes motivation; a goal, a belief, a person etc.

In Akko’s case, it is to become like Shiny Chariot and to meet her. That is the carrot dangling in front of her, what she is constantly chasing after. And Akko is willing to go through the core of the earth and the depths of the ocean to get that carrot. She will not give up on it.

Since a determinator is directly tied to their motivator, what happens when someone tries to give them a piece of the carrot too early? They stop dead in their tracks. They will stand there confused and wonder how they got the piece. The sense of accomplishment is lost for them. Their progression also screeches to a halt, since part of their motivation is lost. Since they also now have a piece, they can scrutinize their motivator much closer. A motivator is always idealized in the eyes of the determinator, but by being given a piece they can see parts of what it truly is.

In this situation, the determinator may very well start to doubt chasing the carrot in the first place. Was it worth it? Is it even worth going forward to get the rest? The determinator may lose the motivator entirely, and it will take time until they find a new one, if they find new motivation again at all.

Ursula was going to reveal that she is Chariot, but then finally realized that at the moment, revealing her identity now would only hurt Akko’s progress and motivation.

Akko would learn of parts about Chariot that doesn’t match her idealized vision of her. Chariot had to hideaway and adopt the Ursula persona. She also failed to unlock the last word, and unlike Akko’s beliefs, she didn’t/couldn’t continue on that path.

So this new information would make Akko doubt both Chariot and herself. If her idol that she strives to become like failed, then what is needed for her not to fail herself?

Ursula’s ideal scenario to reveal herself would be when Akko unlocks the final word: She can then tell that not only has Akko succeded with her goal, she also surpassed her idol. It is a fitting moment to pass on the mantle, both figuratively and literally.

However, I don’t think it will go down like that. Akko most likely will learn the truth before Ursula can tell her herself, but it will be at a point when she has already found another motivator, something that might be more important at that moment than becoming like Shiny Chariot.

Cat Grant Appreciation Week: Day 4 - Favorite Inspiring Speech or Advice

Thanks to @reginalovesemma for the assist on the dialogue.

Cat tells James the story of her first major assignment.

C: Ahh. I finally was assigned a story to write an article about an up-and-coming actor. He was charming, he was gorgeous. He was married to an actress who was also gorgeous. And I interviewed everyone who knew him and they all told me how great he was. “Lovely.” “Talented.” And then I talked to the wife’s makeup artist, and she told me all about the bruises that she had to cover up every morning.
J: So, you did the right thing. You reported the story.
C: No. I didn’t. I caved. I caved in to the pressure from the studio PR hack. So I wrote a little puff piece on him. And, hmm, three months later, he shot his wife in the head.
J: (SIGHS) Do you think if you’d… If you had published what you knew, do you think that you could have prevented her death?
C: I think that every day. See, James, that’s why we do what we do. That’s why we’re driven to tell the truth. Not only because we want to be good journalists, but because we also want to be good people

This is Cat Grant at her very best.  She isn’t perfect, she doesn’t claim to be.  But she learns from her mistakes and she carries them close.  And she uses them to teach people how to avoid making the same ones.  Cat and James worked together at the Planet.  They have a past.  They have a future.  A friendship, a mentorship, a connection.  Cat wants for him to be the very best James Olsen he can be, not just for the benefit of herself and CatCo, but so she can watch her friend, this remarkable young man, grow under her watchful eye.  Cat Grant has regrets, but she doesn’t let them stop her.  They are an integral part of the company she built.  Cornerstones in the very foundation of CatCo.  And James knows this and loves her for it.

Second Chance Sanctuary

The ride home was quiet. Jung said nothing to either one although he did seem to be curious about the hybrid that was riding with her. He was just a driver however; and quiet. >>> doubted anything would come of that. She was going to tell her mother, she was, she just needed some time to figure out how this was all going to go. 

The cleaning service had been by while she was gone, and >>> wondered how it would sound convincing enough to have her mother tell her step-father that she needed to learn to fend for herself. Cooking, cleaning, she always did these things on her own and truth be told you couldn’t just get used to someone cleaning up behind you and cooking for you. 

Instead, once they got inside and to her room, making room in an extra dresser for all of Suho’s new clothes, she turned to him smiling. “You know, you help me a lot with school. So much so that if I want tomorrow I can sign up to take my finals.” 

Suho was still grunting at her over the interaction with the strange feline and merely looked her way before grabbing the bait. “Meaning?” 

“Meaning. If I take them early and pass, I can be out of school until graduation. I can stay all the time with you.” She smiled at him, hoping to push the gloominess of his attitude away now. 

“Shouldn’t you be at school?” Still not looking at her as he folded his jeans. “Be with your friends and socialize?” 

>>> stood up taking the jeans from him. She placed her hand on top of his, forcing Suho to look at her. She knew what was going on, he was feeling left out. He felt like he could be replaced. “Suho, I have some friends but you are my best friend. I would rather spend all my free time, with you.” 

He cut his eyes away from her. “Until someone else comes along anyway…” Standing up he went to her door rubbing his stomach. “Let’s eat now.” 

>>> rolled her eyes. “Suho, I”m serious. Do you think it’s a good idea? We can get a jump start on all of our summer activities; don’t act like you aren’t excited.”

He was excited, thrilled in fact. He wanted to go to the beach, the library, eat more ice cream, watch movies like they did on the weekends. Grinning, he reached out for her and took her hand in his making his way down the stairs. “I hope you do well, I will help you study.” 

That night the anxiety kicked in from Xiumin dissipated and Suho was able to enjoy his night. Food was left in the fridge and as they finished a meal watching Running Man he wondered just what was going through her mind when she said she had an idea. He had planned on being the hybrid in her life, but as easily as she helped others, as easily as they seemed to gravitate towards her made him think. 

In bed that night, his back was against hers. He felt her breathing finally even out, the slow expansion of her lungs and the way she moved her foot to curl around his. They had done this ever since he was big enough, her legs wrapped with his own. He had always thought it was a way to know he was still here, the comfort of it. As time had grown on it started to mean so much more to him. Turning over, Suho watched her face. The pink bonnet on her head was near her eyebrows in an almost comical way. The way her mouth was slightly ajar, some nights he imagined himself kissing her lips and wondered if she would wake up. 

Laying his head down on the pillow once again, he wrapped an arm around her waist, his nose touching her neck he breathed in her scent. That deep cocoa butter smell of her skin. He’d give anything to hold onto this, to always have this moment. Closing his eyes he fell asleep, wondering about tomorrow.

The next day was the same as always, he awoke before her, setting out her school clothes and heating up rice and meat. He believed meat was a good way to start any day. Waking her up, he pushed her into the bathroom to get ready while he made the bed. They ate downstairs together, and he saw her off to school. He had the house to himself while she was gone, and he mostly spent it reading about hybrids online, or watching television. 

>>> said she was going to start letting him go out on his own. To explore and become familiar about where they lived. He was excited about the prospect but not about that fact that he had no money. He wondered if he could find work somewhere, even if it was while >>> was gone. 

It wasn’t long before she finally came home, his internal clock just knew when she was coming. His tail wagging of it’s own accord when he heard her coming up the stone stairs to the house. His arms and legs twitching when she finally opened the door and he fairly pranced around her. Asking about her day, and what she did and how she was feeling, and if she was hungry. 

“Calm down Suho.” Laughing as she placed her hands on his shoulders. “Did you miss me that much?” 

He did of course, and realized what he looked like, holding her school bag, tail slapping the wall behind him. 

“He loves you Princess what can you expect?” An unexpected voice said, causing them both to turn around. 

“You again!” Suho cried, rushing over to where Xiumin stood eating an apple. “How did you get in here?!” 

Shrugging, Xiumin took another bite of apple. “The back door was locked, so I came in through the window.” 

>>> tried to think of what he could mean. “The window in my room? That’s on the second floor, there’s nothing to really climb up to it.” 

“There’s a pipe, and I’m a cat. Easy. You said you’d feed me, I’m here to make good on that.” He wiped his cloak down that he was still wearing. “And to ask a favor, if you can help anyway. Nice place, your parents are loaded?” 

Suho barked. “Hey! This is our house! You can’t just break in and expect to be treated like a guest! No we won’t help you! >>> tell him!” Suho turned around, expecting her to be as angry as he was. 

Arms crossed over her chest, >>> sighed. “Suho is right Xiumin, don’t ever do that again. You could have come to the front door. If neither of us was here, there are maids and they would have called the police.” 

Suho stared at him, smiling that she took his side, giving a satisfied nod to Xiumin. 

“However,” She started. “I did say that I would give you a meal. Now what’s this favor?” 

Xiumin smiled at Suho, who stood there mouth hanging open. >>> gently pushed at his jaw to close it. 

“If I could shower that would be nice, then a warm meal and finally…if you want to, I know someone you can help.” Xiumin began to take off his cloak, under it he wore a pair of shorts and a crop top shirt that said bad kitty on it. 

“Shouldn’t we know about the person first?” >> asked, walking over to Xiumin and taking his hand. 

“No, by the time we’re done he’ll go back to where I know he will always be. Right now, I have no clue where he is.” His long soft gray tail brushed against her back. “Now tell me about you, I want to know everything about my new mistress.” 

“Wait, wait!” Suho ran past them, standing in the middle of the stairs. “Mistress? We aren’t going to let him stay here right? He’s not sleeping here?” 

“Suho…be nice.” She put her arm around Suho’s waist making him walk up the stairs as well. “Can Xiumin borrow a shirt and some shorts from you? Please?” 

Suho’s hands covered his face. “This can’t be happening.” 

While Xiumin was showering, >>> and Suho were in the kitchen heating up dinner. He was quiet the air around him hot and thick. She wanted to say something, anything but really she had no objections to Xiumin staying here. She had no objections to helping whoever else this was coming. Why did Suho? 

“Say something please.” She said, setting out forks on the table. 

Suho grunted. “Why? It’s not like you’ll listen to me anyway.”

Placing a cup down a little too hard, >>> turned to look at his back as he spooned kimchi into a bigger bowl. “Suho, stop. Why are you so jealous? This is our house yes but come on, it’s just us. A few more guests won’t bother anyone.” 

“I’ll be here with them while you’re at school. They will be here when you come home and we normally play games and watch TV, or I help you with schoolwork. They will be present when we do things together.” Bringing the bowl over to the table he nearly slammed it down looking at her. “Do you understand? It’s always been us, I like it just us.” 

She understood. He didn’t like change and he didn’t want to feel like someone else was coming in on their time. She got it. Taking his hand she placed it on her cheek, aware that his tail was wagging gently now. 

“Suho…it will always be us. I won’t forget you is that what you think? I’ll always make time for you, I will be there when you need me, but this..I think this is a good thing that we’re doing. This is something I want to look into doing.” 

He cupped his fingers under her chin. “Taking in strays?” 

“Helping hybrids. Do you think I’ll stop loving you or something? Tell you to leave?” 

That was a fear in his heart, one that he didn’t want voiced. He was scared that she would forget about him. “No.” 

“Good because I love you.” She reached up, scratching right behind his ear, he loved that. 

Leaning into her touch, Suho wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in for a hug. Her fingers digging into the fabric of his sweater, he relished her touch. “I love you too.” 

“This is so touching.” Xiumin interrupted, his hands clasped in front of him before he pretended to wipe away a tear. 

“Cat.” Suho growled, pulling out >>> chair. 

“Dog.” Xiumin answered. “Let’s just put our grievances aside. My name is Xiumin, and I would like to be your friend.” The feline hybrid held out his hand. 

It took >>> clearing her throat before Suho answered. “I’m Suho, and yes we can learn to be civil.” He shook Xiumin’s hand before sitting down. 

>>> smiled looking back and forth between them. “Now that that is over! Xiumin tell me everything about you.” 

He explained to her that he was given as a companion to an elderly woman with way less time on her hands than money. When he was a kitten he’d sit in her lap and she’d stroke his head and feed him sweet treats. Apparently she understood that he was human, but treated him much more like a cat. He wore a collar, ate from a silver bowl, with a fork as he got older. 

He lived a pretty good life, and then as he got older he noticed her niece always came back. A young woman with a bright smile who seemed nice enough. She would give him small things to eat, and tell him how handsome he was. Then one day as she was handing him a rice cake, she snatched it back and told him he had to kiss her to get it. 

Thinking nothing of it, he did. That’s when it started. She would kiss his cheek, and hug him for awhile, then she would kiss his lips. He didn’t mind, he knew he was a “pretty kitty” and thought she was affectionate. When she closed him a room, and demanded he strip however, that’s when he showed his claws. 

He was shut away in a room, only allowed out for a few hours and threatened to be neutered. Then one day the door opened up earlier than usual, but it wasn’t the old woman. It was her niece…she asked him to come out and that he was going to behave because he was going home with her now. The old woman was dead. 

He knew what she had in store for him, so when he was walked outside with his belongings, he took the only bag in his hand and ran off. He kept running until he was out of breath, and his legs were tired. 

“I’m so sorry.” >>> replied as he finished his story, his cake sitting in front of him now.

Xiumin pushed a cherry around on the top of the cheesecake. “You didn’t do anything, but I’m grateful for your kindness…without any strings attached.” 

He looked up at her, his narrow eyes staring at her face, he flashed her a bright smile showing off his canines. 

“What about your friend?” >>> asked, standing up to clear her plate and Suho’s. 

“He should be there by now and we can go see him. He was a “pet” too.” >>> shook her head. He wasn’t a human, they weren’t humans true but did no one see the wrong in this? He was a sentient, living being. They couldn’t be treated like this! 

“A pet? What is it with people?” She dried her hands as Suho came into the kitchen carrying three light jackets with him. 

“Some people it seems.” Xiumin answered. “I’m trying not to hold a grudge, besides you don’t seem bad.” He winked at her, making >>> grin. 

As the trio walked into the city, neither male said anything, Xiumin had taken the lead, with her and Suho right behind as he lead them down busy streets until they came to a warehouse district near the Han river. It had taken them awhile to get here, and her legs were sore, but Xiumin walked over to a metal shipping crate tapping on the door. 

It opened quickly, letting loose a loud creaking noise as a slender oval face appeared in the crack. “Oh Xiumin-hyung! Did you bring me a present?” He opened the door wider, eyes scanning over the two with him. “You brought me more friends?” 

The feline male came from the shipping crate, his clothes were still in very good condition, he bowed and smiled shaking everyone’s hand as he introduced himself. “My name is Lay, how are you? Welcome to my new home.” 

Xiumin showed them inside, and >>> looked around to see he wasn’t living in such bad conditions. A stack of water on one side, there had been battery operated lights strung up in the carrier along the walls. A small bean bag was used as a bed it seemed, a pillow and a blanket folded neatly on top of each other.

“Lay.” >>> asked. “Is this where you live?” 

He smiled, his dimples deep in his cheeks. “Oh yes, I live here now, make yourself at home.” 

He busied himself grabbing some water bottles for them, his long black tail swaying back and forth. Handing one to Xiumin and Suho, Lay stopped in front of >>> handing her the last one. 

“You are very pretty, Xiumin was right, and he said you were nice. Nicer than my last owner. Does this mean you’ll take me in now?” He moved his hair from his eyes, his expression so innocent. 

>>> smiled. “I can’t let you stay here now can I? What happened? Why are you in here alone?” 

The look on his face went from one of happiness and contentment to sorrow and pain. He hugged himself, his well made sweater moving up and down his arms. He nibbled his lip, seeming as though he didn’t know what to say. 

“It’s ok Lay, we can trust her, we can trust them.” Xiumin told him. 

Looking up at >>> Lay grinned, trying to will the tears from his eyes. He opened his mouth and his voice cracked, looking back towards Xiumin who urged him on, Lay wiped his eyes and answered her. 

“I wasn’t a very good present anymore.” 

Ok so that’s chapter three of Second Hand Sanctuary. I hope you guys liked it…it’s sad I know but the good stuff is also coming! 

Chapter Four

I know I’ve been screeching about leverage a lot recently (sorry guys) but I want to take a moment, to seriously talk about it. 

Because I seriously, really, really love this dumbass show! 

What I especially love is the way they handle their characters. Like, leverage could’ve been one of those dark Edgy shows full of angst and man pain and everything being awful all of the time! I mean the premise is pretty bleak, and the only character that doesn’t have a vaguely horrifying backstory is Sophie and that’s because we know absolutely nothing about Sophie’s life before she was a grifter. 

Like Nate. Nate the depressed recently divorced alcoholic with a dead kid. Nate could’ve been the most annoying man pain-y character in existence. Especially considering Nate spends a lot of time being angry and self destructive and hurting the people around him, and, instead of leverage going down the spn route of romantising the fuck out of being miserable all the time and hurting the people you love, they actually, like address it?? Like, Nate does a lot of fucked up shit, but the narrative never once glamorise’s that or excuses it. Nate’s never allowed to get away with his shit. When he fucks up and hurts the others, and he does fuck up and hurt the others, they call him out on his shit. And they actually, like, address Nate’s alcoholism, like, explicitly, on screen?? And it doesn’t just, go away, it’s something Nate’s seen to struggle with consistently over the entire show. And yeah, Nate’s never like “cured” his addiction is a huge part of his life and it’s obviously going to always be there in one form or another but he does get better. He find’s a family, he turns his life around, he apologizes for all the shit he’s put them through and makes an effort to do better, and like, the show ends with Nate in a position that is 1000X better than the one he started in. 

Or Eliot, god, Eliot on any other show would’ve been insufferable! I mean, here’s this large, manly character who fights for a living with a tragic backstory. He could’ve been the most ridiculously hyper-masculine character ever, but like, instead, he’s a giant puppy. (A giant puppy who’s murdered people) But like, Eliot, un-ironically adores cooking, loves horses and singing and in my experiance generally when shows go “here’s this manly character that also likes un-manly things” it’s turned into a joke. They never do that with Eliot, ever. and yeah he’s kind of a womanizer at first, but he actually gets a shockingly low number of random one night stands, and, I don’t think we see a single one of them on screen. Plus, like, Eliot always seems genuinely respectful of the people he’s slept with/ dated, I mean, all those random facts Eliot pulls out from his previous girlfriends about fashion ect, Eliot obviously put a lot of time into learning about his partners passions and, I apreciate that. The way they deal with his past is pretty cool too, like Eliot canonically has done some really, really horrific things, and they very easily could’ve either used this for man pain or excused/ justified it. But they don’t. Instead they give Eliot a beautifully written redemption arc that drives home time and time again that he’s done awful things but that he’s trying to be better. 

(They also could’ve used it to make Eliot one of those annoying anti-hero types, ya know the “I don’t like guns/ killing but I’ll throw you off a building” types. Eliot doesn’t like to kill, and he doesn’t like guns, but instead of just having Eliot harp on about that whilst also like, doing things that very much should kill people, they actually show Eliot really not liking doing either of those things. Eliot will kill, if he has to, but he tried not to, he never says that, but you see it. And the gun thing is actually treated less like a moral issue and more like a trigger than anything.) 

Hardison, I love Hardison. So much. I love that he’s this warm loving openly affectionate character. Hardison loves them all so much and he makes sure they know it. And there are many, many posts out there talking about Hardison being great PoC representation so I’m not gonna talk about that too much because, well, it’s better if you read actual PoC’s meta than mine but I also adore that too! 

And Sophie, I love Sophie’s arc so much! I mean, Sophie is probably the least fucked up/ most functional member of the group, but she has her own issues, and those are treated beautifully. I love how Sophie goes from, having spent so much of her life lying that she doesn’t know how to tell the truth anymore and so much of her life pretending to be someone else that she doesn’t know who she is anymore to finding herself, and learning to trust her family enough to really let them in. 

Parker. Parker I could write for an infinity about. My love for Parker knows no bounds. Parker at the start is a character who’s been through hell and come out angry and broken and scared. Parker’s story is a recovery arc in many ways, there’s no doubt that Parker was abused, although you never know the details. In fact, I apreciate that you never know the details, because thats not what her story’s about. Her story’s about her, finding a family and learning to let people in again. Because whatever it is that happened to Parker she responds by shutting down. By pushing everyone away, by being absolutely, utterly terrified of letting anyone in, or of letting herself be vulnerable. 

Parker never falls into the good surviver trope either, her abuse is never framed as having made her better, or stronger, or kinder, it doesn’t make her weak either. It does make her sad, and angry and scared, but never weak. And that’s something I apreciate more deeply than I know how to phrase. That and the fact that her relationship with Hardison doesn’t just magically cure all her problems. She’s shown to struggle with her feelings for Hardison, she’s shown to be afraid of them, and of letting him in, and the two of them, they talk about it. He gives her the time and space she needs to be comfortable, he never pushes and he never fixes or saves, he loves Parker exactly the way she is. And, speaking of which, Parker’s probably one of the better examples of an autistic character I’ve come across (I’m not even treating this as a head canon Parker is literally autistic). Parker is autistic, parker is obviously autistic, she doesn’t understand emotions, either in herself or others, she says and does socially inappropriate things, has no idea how to interact with other people, is always taking things literally, honestly how does anyone think this girl is NT??? 

But, Parker’s autistic traits are just, accepted, unconditionally by the others and no one tries to fix her!!!!! Yes, Sophie teaches her how to grift, but mostly because Parker asks, the only time any of them ever try to teach her how normal people do things is if she asks them and, honestly like, it means a lot to me that parker gets to have a recovery/ redemption arc without any of her autistic traits being cured, or ever treated as things that need curing/ fixing!!

And TlDr I love the way everyone gets redemption/ recovery arcs (/actual character development) without the show ever forgetting or erasing their pasts!

Waiting on Wednesday: It’s Not Like It’s a Secret by Misa Sugiura

Sana Kiyohara has too many secrets. Some are small, like how it bothers her when her friends don’t invite her to parties. Some are big, like that fact that her father may be having an affair. And then there’s the one that she can barely even admit to herself—the one about how she might have a crush on her best friend. Sana always figured that the hardest thing would be to tell people that she wants to date a girl, but as she quickly learns, telling the truth is easy… what comes after it, though, is a whole lot more complicated.

Publisher: HarperTeen

Publication date: May 9th 2017

Goodreads | Amazon UK | Amazon US

Episode Idea: Starlight Goes Away Forever - When Starlight Glimmer realizes that she’s grown up and learned all she could from Twilight, she decides that she has to make her own path - she has trouble telling Twilight, especially when a problem arises that only she can help solve, though through using what she’s learned she tells Twilight the truth and moves into Trixie’s cart - becoming Trixie’s mentor so they can travel Equestria together for Trixie’s magic shows. Starlight decides she can’t return until she’s had time to herself. For her development.

And the stinger at the end is that Trixie sells her to Discord for an enchanted bag of cinnamon nuts that will give her powers beyond her imagination and Starlight becomes a decorative lawn gnome.


238 (no, I’m not kidding) Captain Swan canon and au fics. It will be updated regularly. [updated: 25.01]

SEASON 2 (ish)


  • Trust and Hope - M - Word Count: 18,461 -  Emma never left Killian on the beanstalk, and he never went back to Cora. Bonus: Emma kissed Killian. Follow their journey as they attempt to get back to Storybrooke, and what happens if they do.

  • I’m Not Done With You - T - Word Count: 21,094 -  After two weeks have passed and Killian hasn’t been seen anywhere in town, Emma takes it into her own hands to find the missing pirate.

  • Ten Hours - E - Word Count: 11,110 - When Hook arrivs in Storybrooke (in Season 2), he tracks down Emma Swan, who owes him ten hours after leaving him atop a beanstalk.

Keep reading

❤️ We all know, at the very core, a mother is someone who loves profoundly, provides selflessly, supports unconditionally. She is someone who never gives up hope their child is destined for words beyond greatness, someone who thinks far beyond herself, who takes on the pain of growing pains, who comes to the rescue, even a thousand miles away. A mother is someone who dries your tears and dispels your fears, all in one fell swoop. A mother is someone who doesn’t believe in boredom – keep dreaming, keep learning, keep creating – because we are certainly not here forever. She is someone who tells the way-too-honest truth, who always wants you to be the best and feel the best, even though, at times, those actions doesn’t seem possible or Instagrammable. A mother is someone who hands you a coupon & then tells you not to spend any money. She is someone who has perfected the art of efficiency & practicality, someone who brings their own coffee sweetener wherever they go & never, ever leaves an appliance plugged in. A mother is someone who preaches sensible choices & realizes it may take more than three decades for anyone to follow her gospel of sensibility. A mother is someone who asks you 78 times a month why you haven’t made that doctors appointment & will for the rest of her life. A mother is someone who loves to celebrate your victories & reminds you to always celebrate them, too, in moderation, of course – never be the last to leave the party and always be a lady. She is someone who also realizes ‘never’ and 'always’ are easier said than done. A mother is someone who wants you to slow down, put the phone away, live in the present, make time to just breathe & just be. She is someone who encourages you to live life largely & boldly, but to always stay sweet & humble, and to keep writing, keep sharing, keep shining. A mother is someone I’d like to be someday. These are things I know because I get to have the greatest one of all. Happy Mother’s Day, y'all. ❤️

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Skye / Daisy Johnson [INFP]

Introverted Feeling (Fi): Skye is driven by a very internal system of values, whether that system lines up with the world around her or not. She places strong importance on people knowing the truth about the world around them, and has no issue with breaking the law or making enemies in pursuit of that belief—but she is open to using new information to re-shape the path she takes, as long as that path is still true to her inherent sense of right and wrong—such as wanting to join S.H.I.E.L.D. once she learns that their agenda lines up with hers. Skye is extremely sensitive to her own emotions, and to the emotions of the people around her, though she is not always forward about it. She can be expressive, but deals with stress best either on her own (such as taking time to herself to process learning the truth about her past), or through action (such as channeling her emotions into a desire to take down HYRDA—and even her own father—at all costs). She shows a lot of compassion, especially for anyone who might be victimized by circumstances out of their control, and while she has a very strong desire for personal connection and a sense of belonging, she relates the best to the rest of the team in smaller groups, or one-on-one, where she encourages the others (Coulson in particular) to tune into their own feelings.

Extroverted Intuition (Ne): When presented with new information, Skye sees possibilities in where it can lead, both good and bad, and she reads people very well. She is intrigued by Quinn’s technology and the opportunities working for him can have, but senses that he has ill intentions and turns down his job offer, though she accepts Coulson’s request to join his team because her instinct tells her he is good—even if she still has reservations on S.H.I.E.L.D. as a whole. When talking to Ward while he is in the brig, she adjusts her approach based on what she reads from his responses, and what will get her what she needs. She finds hope when she learns the truth about herself, because she sees the new directions she can go in her search. Skye feels limited whenever barriers are imposed on her, and would rather have the freedom to explore ideas as they come—something that is noticed by May, who kicks her off the bus for this reason, and Skye thrives, able to improvise and react as she sees new paths open up. She frequently offers suggestions the others on the team don’t see, because she can easily look past the immediate problem to the bigger picture, and does not get caught up in details, always moving from one possible solution to the next.

Introverted Sensing (Si): Skye connects her physical world to meaning based on her experiences. She finds comfort in the closet on the Bus because it reminds her of her van. She understands the significance a special toy can have, and uses Ace’s Hulk doll to prove to him his father is safe and that Ace can trust her. Skye also recalls information about her surroundings and uses them in tense situations, such as deploying the escape raft to block the hull breach because she remembers a safety manual she’d reluctantly read earlier. She romanticizes the idea of family because she never had one but has seen what family could be, and she remembers what the other members of the team have done and how they have responded, and is prepared for them to respond in that way again—but she holds grudges, and does not easily forgive once someone has behaved in a way that causes her or the people she cares for pain.

Extroverted Thinking (Te): Skye wants to see results. When she takes in information she wants to do something with it. She turns to hacking to find out about her past, and quickly uses her new skills to go after S.H.I.E.L.D. When the team takes in information she wants to know what the plan is to get the bad guys and save the good guys—a trait that ends up getting her shot, when she isn’t content to just gather intel on Quinn and chooses to take action instead. However, despite her skills as a hacker being reliant on understanding digital systemic organization, Skye continually questions the rules of S.H.I.E.L.D., frustrated that the team’s orders  limit them from doing what is right, and she struggles with Ward’s rigidity while he is her S.O.


  • Many years after the Order, Ahsoka comes to visit the Jedi graves. 
  • Not the tombs beneath the Temple on Coruscant; no, that place has been picked clean by Vader and the Empire, turned into a hall for fundraisers and executions. 
  • No, Ahsoka visits the graves that are scattered across the galaxy, the graves on planets half the Jedi had never even heard of. These are the graves of the Jedi who fell in the field and were buried at the nearest Order outpost, their spirits robbed of proper burial rights by the shifting tides of the Clone Wars. 
  • The ex-Jedi is forces to make some markers of her own. She rebuilds the graves the Empire has found and destroyed. She constructs new ones for the Jedi who never had the privilege of a burial. 
  • On a tiny planet that hides in the gentle embrace of a nebula, Ahsoka carves a burial marker for the Jedi who found her, Plo Koon. 
  • She carves a stone for the Jedi who betrayed her, because the two girls were friends once, and no other reason is needed. 
  • Ahsoka carves a stone for her fallen master. This one takes her many, many rotations to complete, because each time she begins work, she finds herself soaked with tears and pain and her fingers tremble too much to hold her tools. 
  • But she finishes. And later, when Ahsoka learns the truth of what her master really is, she returns to the site of his marker.
  • “I knew,” she tells the smooth white marble. “I may not have realized it, but I’ve always known. I was just too much a coward to face it.” 
  • The stone does not speak back.
  • Ahsoka doesn’t destroy the marker. She leaves it there on the planet in the birthplace of the stars, untouched and unharmed, because nothing has changed. Not really. Anakin Skywalker was laid to rest beneath that stone, not Darth Vader. 
  • Perhaps, she thinks, someone, someday, will find this place and remember him as she does. As the greatest Jedi Knight to ever live. As a kind master. As a friend, and as family.