she seems so genuinely happy about it and it makes me happy!

EDIT II: This post has been going around as definite proof that the Cult Ending is fact, and the real way the game works. As such, I’ve been accused of spreading misinformation, to a degree that I’ve been getting extremely toxic and damaging messages.

I want to clarify at this point, this post was made as a vent, back when the data-mine of the Cult End was beginning, and we first got the info that it was a file in the game. The Data-Mine is pretty much finished now, at this point; nothing new to find. And it’s revealed that, while the ending is in a playable state, no coding in the game actually makes it possible to play it. There’s no outcome you can get to trigger this end.

No one is sure if this is a cut ending, future DLC, or if it’s a bug messing up the coding trigger. All we know is we found it, and I made a post too hasty in assumption. I made it when we still thought it was possible to achieve.

So please. Take this with a grain of salt. I don’t want to delete this post, as I feel like it would give the bad impression that I simply wanted to spread fire, with no care for repercussions. But I do want people to know I’ve learned now.

I’m sorry to everyone that I deceived with this. It wasn’t my intention at all, but execution doesn’t always pan out like we hope.


EDIT III: Good god, how often am I going to be updating this post.

Well, we have verification the ending isn’t as scrapped as we thought it was.

An update patch for Dream Daddy to fix bugs and add Robert’s Whittling minigame also secretly updated the coding of the Cult Ending. This info was found VIA data-mining the Level18 files as they were before and after.

The updated files include more trigger codings, and has added the achievement trigger for what we presume is “Escape the Margarita Zone,” as it is listed as “ACHIEVEMENT_SECRET.”

While it doesn’t necessarily mean the ending is definitely going to be playable in the future, it does make the ending’s chances of becoming a possible canon that much more of a reality.


Man. The reveal of what Joseph actually is both amazes and horrifies me further than what we’ve seen.

Okay, so data-mining revealed that Joseph does have a good ending, but it’s not much different from the bad. He still remains with Mary, but he takes you in as a side-man (AKA, he stays with you to continue an affair on Mary.) It’s not very good either, so I won’t be surprised to see people voice disappointment when they get it.

HOWEVER, data-mining found something even worse in the code. And that is Joseph has a third ending, a secret ending, and potentially, the TRUE ending of not only his route, but the game entirely. This ending has been dubbed “cult ending.”

This ending ended up revealing that Joseph is not at all what he seems. He’s not a man living a broken marriage, forcing himself to stay with an alcoholic and cheating wife to have some semblance of a family life with his kids. No, this family he’s created is simply a facade to hide who he is.

Joseph isn’t human. He some sort of demonic entity that has an ulterior motive. His children aren’t truly his children in the sense that you’d assume, they’re more like broken portions of himself, inhabiting child-like forms. And Mary is a woman who was forced to play a role to paint a picture, an illusion. Something she can’t escape from, because Joseph literally has her wrapped around his finger.

Joseph also is a leader of a cult (Obviously, given the fact that this ending is dubbed “cult end.”) I’m not too knowledgeable about the cult, but apparently it’s a front to rituals and the like. We know Robert was, at one point, a part of the cult, but isn’t any longer.

And finally, we know Joseph is drawing forth energy from other single dads, possibly both sexually and ritualistically, to bring the “Eternal King” back to life. He specifically needs the energy from single dads, and with some sort of dark magic, he lures them to his part of town for ease of access. He also is responsible for causing the events of them all being single. Every single dad, he influenced their destinies to fuel his own ambitions.

And once you find this out, you start noticing shit everywhere! There’s symbols of his cult in practically every part of town. Certain behaviors give an odd feeling. It’s just… it’s shocking to go back in to see this.

The cult end finishes with a man name Saul Graves coming to speak to you, and telling you to try and live your life normally. I’m not sure the entirety of the end, I guess it implies Joseph is on the run now? I don’t know, if anyone can clarify it, let me know.

Now, this was a beyond shocking twist to a lot of people. Especially since the game is so comedic, and the other routes, while they may have poignant moments, it’s nothing completely horrifying. I know I certainly was beyond stunned to discover this, but I honestly had a feeling something would happen like this. Though I wasn’t expecting it to actually be Joseph’s route to cause this; I thought it would’ve been a route where you don’t date any dads!

And I know that there’s some speculation that the “cult end” isn’t truly canon (As in, Joseph isn’t actually in a cult or is a demon, it’s just there for intrigue) and is just a dream end. But the fact you start noticing shit after experiencing the end, imagery and encounters, it just… I really can’t see this as being nothing but the truth. Even if you don’t get the ending where you find out what Joseph truly is, he’s still a demonic entity with dark motives, influencing the town and its people to his goals.

And then there’s something that’s honestly quite saddening to think. It’s because of the fact that, even if you don’t get the cult end, it doesn’t change what Joseph is. He’s using single dads’ energy to summon his King to the world. He SPECIFICALLY needs single dads. He has caused all of the other dads to lose their significant other to further his goals, from divorce to death. He’s the reason they’re single in the first place.

Because of this, you pairing up with a dad doesn’t give me a good feeling. Because he needs the dads to be single to draw their energy. And he doesn’t care about “true love” or “good ends.” He’ll tear you apart to forward his goals.

Joseph doesn’t care if Craig’s ending was the cutest thing anyone’s experienced. Joseph doesn’t care if you truly have a connection to Mat.

He needs you two to be single to feed off of you both. And he knows how to break you two apart without anyone ever expecting a thing.

Basically, the reveal of what Joseph is makes me look in fear at all of the other dads, look in fear of their good ends. Because even if it’s a happy end we experienced in what we saw, it implies it’s not meant to last. Down the road, we’ll either be broken up by Joseph’s influences, or he’ll influence one of our’s deaths.

And we won’t think anything odd about it. We’ll just think it didn’t work out, or that life is a cruel mistress.

This is so sinister, like I both love it for the intrigue, but hate it because I genuinely wanted cute moments, and now knowing what Joseph is, I can’t see them as cute anymore. I can’t see myself being happy with any of the Dad’s routes, because there’s that looming thought that it’ll just end in sadness again.

Fucking christ. I didn’t sign up for Dream Daddy to be this dark.


EDIT: This post really blew up, to the point that people are wondering if I’m making shit up due to lack of sources. I wasn’t intending this to get big, it was a vent/personal post, with at most some theories on implications that I thought would get lost to the various other posts people make. I made a reblog showing links that give more info, but for future people that find the post, here are various links on the info we have on the route.

Here’s some images found that pertain to this ending.

Here’s a transcript of how the route goes, from people descrambling the code. Also contains some more images.

Better quality textures of “Cultist Joseph.”

And finally, here’s how people did the data-mine.

IMPORTANT THINGS IN THE BOOTLEG

Jeremy’s massive thing of Aveeno and tissues. Same.

Will Connolly has nice legs.

Jeremy tucks in his shirt? What a nerd.

The choreography in More Than Survive is legendary.

Chloe is an asshole. Also, I’m pretty sure Jeremy was going to defend Jenna? Good boy.

Jeremy is so gleeful when he sees the sign up sheet? Fuck everyone who says he only signed up for Christine- this boy clearly wanted to do it, he was just too scared to go for it.

The sad look as he realizes that the signup is just going to end in humiliation.

CHRISTINE’S LIP BALM??? Get moisturized!

IS MY MACBOOK PRO HARD DRIVE

Brooke’s hair is gorgeous.

Jeremy bops along to Michael’s rap, which is adorable. It also shows that he’s only really comfortable around him- compare Jeremy in the chorus of More Than Survive, where he’s flailing and totally unable to keep with the choreography to Two Player Game, where he and Michael are completely in sync.

Handshake is repeated in Two Player Game! Motif confirmed!

Speaking of which, Michael himself is totally with the choreography. I think this can be taken as either him accepting his place in the hierarchy, or at least having the social skills to navigate it. Either way, it makes sense that he has trouble relating to Jeremy’s frustration with fitting in- in his own way, he already does.

Also, the prop and scene transitions are fantastic? The entire set is ridiculously versatile, and it’s incredible how seamless the transitions are and how they blend into the dancing. Also, the fucking sky bean bags. Who do you think had to stand up on the catwalks and drop those? I wanna know.

At 7:40 we have some quality hand flapping action? I mean, this entire scene is great- Jeremy stands up straighter and looks so genuinely excited, and he runs up to the poster, so ready to get genuinely into this play… and then Rich calls him gay and publically humiliates him.

Speaking of Rich, he’s kind of a dick in this, isn’t he? I mean, the whole bullying thing definitely is not a mild issue- Rich spends most of his time attacking Jeremy. At 2:40 he straight up punches Jeremy in the nuts, he actually lays hands on him during the “BOYF” scene, and when he’s singing to him, at one point he’s clearly about to punch him. Hard.

Speaking of that moment, I want to point out Jeremy’s instantaneous reaction to Rich raising his hand. That’s not a normal reaction. Normal people block their faces, obviously, but the way Jeremy automatically does it before Rich even finishes raising his hand, that’s not normal. That’s what people do when they’ve been hit. A lot.

Anyways, Michael is amazing? Such a supportive friend. So many good friendly touches. 9:45’s little face pat, and the entirety of Two Player Game stick out.

“WELL I’M JEREMY!”

And lemme talk about I Love Play Rehearsal too. I love Christine, and she’s so amazingly extra in everything she does. I also love how happy Jeremy is listening to her, even if he’s too nervous to talk, and how Christine is totally cool with that! They have a lot of great chemistry in this!

I also love how it’s absolutely obvious that Christine is horrible at reading the room and is constantly unaware of the innuendos she’s making. My beautiful, oblivious daughter.

And, she’s so comfortable with him! You go girl! Shout at the sweaty man!

Jeremy is a ball of spastic energy. Constantly. I can relate.

Shout out to Jeremy putting his hands over his lap. It’s okay man. We all have boners for Christine.

Jeremy’s little smile during her song? It’s adorable. 100% wholesome. He’s so in love.

And Christine poking his… like, everywhere? Cute as hell.

And for that matter, Jeremy’s nervous tic of smoothing down his hair? Really cute. He does it a lot too!

Jake is apparently also on the Frisbee Golf Team. Make of that what you will.

Mr. Reyes hugging Christine. Quality comforting. My poor daughter, who then proceeds to harass him during the Hot Pocket Break. Perfect girl.

She also seems really hesitant initially with Jake. Her body language is very much “Leave me alone please.”

Jeremy has canonically had to go to the nurse over breakdowns.

Rich has seen Mr. Reyes urinate. This isn’t important, but like. It happened. Why.

Rich spends the entire discussion before his song urinating while rolling his hips. And doesn’t wash his hands. Then puts said hands all over Jeremy. Jeremy has indirectly touched Rich’s dick.

Rich’s lisp comes back when he shouts at Jeremy, then he slaps himself. Damn, that’s heartbreaking.

Also, irrelevant to Rich, but Jeremy’s hands are in his pockets 85% of the time. Like a bisexual penguin.

Rich at 20:33 keeps touching Jeremy’s face. He still has not washed his hands.

AGAIN, RICH WAS ABOUT TO SERIOUSLY FUCK UP JEREMY’S FACE, AND FROM HIS IMMEDIATE, REFLEXIVE REACTION, WE CAN TELL THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE.

Please, someone make a tutorial for the SQUIP hand gestures. I love them.

Rich makes Jeremy stand straight. Foreshadowing much?

When Rich sings “Rule!” at 22:25, he does the rising fist motion from Pitiful Children.

Jeremy’s flailing at 23:09, beautiful anxious deer child. He’s beauty, he is grace, he’s gonna shove a SQUIP in his face.

“Aren’t you gonna wash your hands?”

Rich flashing Jeremy while he shouts about how the SQUIP makes it so he doesn’t get piss on his hands.

Rich is a nasty boy.

Jeremy’s reprise of the SQUIP Song is great.

YEET

Michael has reentered the narrative and they both sound so happy to see each other.

Beanbags, our twin heavenly Lords and Saviors, are made with space fabric.

Jeremy and Michael move in perfect tandem, like holy shit. They straight up swap controllers for a bit and keep playing as they talk and dance and annoy each other? Incredible.

This is the most wholesome thing I’ve ever seen. So full of holes.

Michael tickles Jeremy? GOOD SHIT.

Jeremy steals Michael’s controller and his face has such glee. So playful. So pure.

Friendly reminder that part of the reason Jeremy took the SQUIP and kept obeying it was fear of become his father- depressed and negligent.

The awkward hell of having to stare at Mr. Heere’s crotch. Every time he shows up. Jeremy, I feel your pain.

Mr. Heere goes in for the hair tussle and is brutally rejected by his son. In general, Jeremy is really upset by his parents, both his dad and his deadbeat mom.

Michael is super insecure.

Honestly, this whole thing is like watching the build up to a tragedy. It’s honestly unnerving to now Jeremy’s going to get the living shit kicked out of him.

Jeremy flipping Michael off at 29:07 is my aesthetic.

Rich and Jake helping with the scene transitions are amazing.

Michael’s constant glaring at Spooky Stock Boy is legendary. Quality moral support here.

Every Time Jeremy’s voice cracks, I triple in power.

The robotic backup singers and theremin during Stock Boy’s reprise are my sexuality.

Tag yourself, I’m massive hat lady.

“Minty?”

MICHAEL IS SO FUCKING HYPED FOR THAT PEPSI, DAMN SON.

More quality Jer-flaps at 34:23.

JEREMY’S SEIZURE. HOLY SHIT MY SON IS IN PAIN. ALL WHUMP IS CANON.

I mean, seriously, that’s an actual goddamn seizure. That’s horrifying.

NO JENNA DON’T RECORD JEREMY DYING, GET FUCKING MEDICAL ATTENTION.

Christine is so fucking worried, and she pushes Jake away for making fun of Jeremy. I love her.

ERIC’S HERE BITCHES.

WARNING: YOU ARE ABOUT TO ENTER THE TERRITORY OF AN EMOTIONAL ARMY, WHO SIMPLY WANTS TO APPRECIATE AND CHERISH AN ANGEL KNOWN AS JUNG HOSEOK. You have been warned!

Now, who is Hoseok for me?

Hoseok is my so called ‘THE bias’ of BTS (since all of them are my biases… oops).

Hoseok is my inspiration.

Hoseok is my sunshine.

And somehow he is hated and under appreciated.

Why is that, however?

Perhaps it could be because he is too kind

Originally posted by eynmagination

It could because he genuinely loves and cares for his members

Originally posted by omojinyounghobi

And in generally is kind to all. After all, there are those who can’t fathom the idea, that someone might actually be nice and supportive to other people.

Originally posted by onetrue14

Maybe he gets hate for trying to stay positive. Some people feed on negative energy and thus really wish to bering someone with good vibes down, they want to bring down that precious smile, to destroy it.

Originally posted by jhope-shi

And of course, one of the biggest reasons people hate him is because he is so talented. And as a result he achieved fame along side his members

Originally posted by itsvanillish

Originally posted by btsgifdump

And it pains me, oh it pains me so much to see this amazing, beautiful young man get hurt.

It hurts me so much to see people throw insults at him simply because of jealousy, because the feel threatened.

Hoseok deserves the universe.

Remember the video, when on his birthday he saw a video filmed to wish him happy birthday? Remember how emotional he got, how touched and honoured?

Originally posted by pastelyoonseok

He didn’t waste any time, making sure to thank all the people around him, to hug them, hold their hand, anything to express his gratitude.

******

This is a young man who had the ability to do a full solo song for the groups album and he chose to write a song about his mum, for his mum, thanking her for all she went through. 

Originally posted by jeonity

This is the young BOY who said to himself that the only way he can make his mother proud, the only way he can repay her for all her sacrifices is to ‘become successful.’ Even if that meant selling his all.

Selling his body to endless practice

Originally posted by yvainne

Selling his private life

Originally posted by hobismole

And even selling his own emotions.

What does that mean?

Well, on one hand Jhope is a sunshine, on one hand he is Hobi.

A sunshine with a smile so pure

Originally posted by hyejonqs

A sunshine with a laugh so genuine

Originally posted by hobsflower

A sunshine who just loves to play around

Originally posted by jhope-shi

Yet on the other hand, he is Jung Hoseok.

Someone with a deadly passion

Originally posted by hobipd

Someone with extremely powerful emotions

Originally posted by prince-hobis-castle

Someone rather serious

Originally posted by hopetaeguk

Someone who smiles much more calmly

Originally posted by chimneytaels

And honestly, I love that calm side just as much as I love the sunshine side.

Because part of the allure of Hoseok is that he is a very full rounded human being. A very beautiful one inside and out. And so what i hope is that Hoseok actually allows himself to be himself (whatever that truly is). 

Im sure that his members are alway there to support him.

Hoseok’s existence seems to be making everyone happy.

Originally posted by kths

Originally posted by sugasmagnificentlegs

But its those precious moments when Hoseok is happy for himself, content with his own self that he shines like the amazing star he truly is.

Originally posted by hohbi

Originally posted by eyesmiletrash

Originally posted by yourbiaslikesitrough

When he allows his emotions to overtake him

Originally posted by sugaswagdaddy

That my heart just fills with happiness to the brim as I realise that yes, I do love this young man in some sense.

It is then that I smile because he gives me happiness, a reason to be excited, a reason to work hard.

Which is why I wold like to ask more people to pay attention to tis amazing young man.

Looks are subjective, dance is subjective and so is the ‘great’ rap style. Just because he doesnt fit your ideal type does not mean that you have to start creating movements in order to bring him down. If your favourites do not deserve to be destroyed, the neither does Hoseok, or any other innocent soul.

Originally posted by hobsflower

I hope Hoseok stays happy.

I hope he IS happy.

I hope he gets more opportunities to shine, to create his own work, develop his own self both as an artist and as a human being.

I hope he stays healthy because unhealthy Hoseok is broken Hoseok and nobody wants that. No, not because people would stop stanning, but because we do not want him to be in pain.

But if he is, I hope he does not feel like he is a Burden to BTS or ARMYs.

Because he isn’t.

Angel Hobi down mean perfect Hobi for me. It means a relatable Hobi, someone who is human, kind, emotional, loving. Angel Hobi means that by being himself, Hobi gives us one more reason to smile and go through our day.

And it would pain me if he doesn’t know what he means to me, to us.

We ARMYs support, love and cherish Hoseok to the fullest and i pray to all entities that he knows that.

Because his smile is one that must never fall.

Originally posted by itsvanillish

Originally posted by hobilu

Originally posted by sugutie

Originally posted by kawaiinekololitablog

Originally posted by btsleepy

Originally posted by sugamysavagebaby

Originally posted by caramelpjm

Because his smile is one that deserves to forever stay genuine.

Lets spread the love for this amazing young man!

Thank you for reading!

Originally posted by hoseokxx

post-emoji movie Trauma

WARNING: the following text contains spoilers and can be considered disturbing to some readers. especially my brain, because it’s leaking out my ears after typing this.

This is the first movie ever I’ve gone to see on opening night. And let me just say that, for the record, I’m glad I went to watch with friends. Without them, I would have most likely calmly exited the room, climbed up to the roof, and dived straight off.

Keep reading

2

SECRET SESSIONS LONDON - MY STORY💕

13/10/17 (aka THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE)

okay so where do I begin…WOW.
okay so… on Monday October 3rd at 10:25pm, I was sitting on my phone in my room listening to holy ground and I was on twitter and BOOM. “TAYLOR NATION SENT YOU A DIRECT MESSAGE” I STARTED SHAKING AND CRYING WHEN I READ THE CONFIDENTIAL MESSAGE I WAS SO CONFUSED BECAUSE THEY DONT EVEN FOLLOW ME (yes I’m still trying to work out technology ok) AND I FLIPPED OUT AND I RAN INTO MY MOMS ROOM SOBBING AND I TRIPPED OVER THE HOOVER BUT ITS OKAY. MY MOM WAS SAYING ALL SORTS OF THINGS LIKE SOMEONE MAY HAVE HACKED INTO TAYLOR NATIONS ACCOUNT (?????? idk). Anyway I died and my mind was a mess and I couldn’t control myself at all, I had knew what it usually meant when people got these messages and I explained everything to my mom ( she is genuinely worst-case-scenario-Christine ) and she started crying with happiness for me. THAT DAY WILL ALWAYS BE REMEMBERED.

The next day October 4th at 5:27pm, I was (trying) to study when BOOM. I RECEIVED THE CALL. Ali phoned and told me about a special secret event on Friday the 13th of October and I was shaking so so much and could barely even talk but she was honestly the nicest ever (I noticed she said “wonderful” about a million times and I’m now so in love with that word). Side note: My mom still wasn’t really convinced this wasn’t a set up to get me kid napped but SHE FINALLY CALMED DOWN A LITTLE AND MEANWHILE I WAS SHAKING, CRYING AND BASICALLY DEAD.

Okay so then it was the waiting game…the days DRAGGED in as I found out a whole 10 DAYS before the event and I saw Taylor lurk people on tumblr/Instagram AND she liked the post about me and my best friend Eve. PEOPLE WERE ALSO TALKING ABOUT WHAT COULD HAPPEN ON THE 13TH AND I WAS JUST SITTING THERE LIKE HELP ME WHATS GON HAPPEN.

Fast forward to Friday…so because I live in Glasgow I had to fly to London… I COULDNT SLEEP AT ALL AND I ONLY GOT 4 HOURS SLEEP LOL BECAUSE I GOT UP AT 4AM. We went to the airport and I was genuinely so nervous and excited about what could possibly be happening. We then got a bus and then a tube and wandered about Covent Garden and EVERYTHING kept reminding me of Taylor. We then got a tube and another bus ( NUMBER 13 ) to our hotel. I got really stressed out because I opened up my case and there was makeup spilt on my dress BUT MY MOM CAME TO THE RESCUE AND FIXED IT FOR ME. I curled my hair and fixed myself up then I went to out to the secret meeting point and recognized so many people from tumblr/twitter etc and it was SO surreal. ALSO A FEW PEOPLE CAME UP TO ME AND WERE LIKE OMG ABBIE I KNOW YOU AND THAT MADE ME FEEL SO SO SPECIAL SO I LOVE YOU FOR THAT IF THAT WAS YOU. We checked in and got really cool wristbands saying United Kingdom (IN THE REPUTATION FONT) I WAS ALREADY DEAD.

We went to drop off our bags and me and I met 2 beautiful, amazing girls called Emma ( @taylorsmusic ) and Flora ( @spoookyswift ) and we were FREAKING OUT TOGETHER. We just couldn’t comprehend that we could potentially meet our idol. We talked about everything and I genuinely think I have 2 new best friends for life. I LOVE YOU GUYS. We were on the last bus to leave so we waited foreverrrr and my nerves were building up so much and I was FULL ON ALL OVER SHOOK.

Everyone on the bus was SO EXCITED and we were all dying together. It was such a combination of nerves and excitement like I can’t even describe it. So we FINALLY arrived at our secret destination and were escorted to the entrance to be searched etc (there was a big box of socks for some reason and it made us laugh so just thought I’d add that in and also a few half finished smart water bottles👀).

Okay so then we went through to TAYLORS HOUSE. It was beautiful and there was so much food laid out and I had a REPUTATION COOKIE and CUSTOMIZED REPUTATION M&MS and CHICKEN TENDERS. Taylors playlist of the songs she loves was playing in the background and we were LOVING LIFE. (Side note: my mom loved the olives you put out taylor so thanks for that) So basically me, Emma and Flora were chilling together (we were not chill at all tho) and everything was fine THEN Flora goes “oh my god, that’s Scott” AND IM LIKE WTF AND WE ALL LOOK OVER AND DIE LIKE WHAT WAS HAPPENING BEFORE OUR VERY EYES THE KING OF GUITAR PICS WAS HERE. We went and spoke to more amazing people and life was good…THEN TREE COMES THROUGH AND IM LIKE WHATATSTSS THATS A LEGEND THEN NOT LONG AFTER THAT WE SEE ANDREA AND WE ALL DIED. I CRIED WHEN I SEEN ANDREA IDK WHY IT JUST GOT TOO MUCH AND SHES MY QUEEN. IT GENUINELY FELT LIKE A DREAM LIKE SURELY THIS WAS NOT REAL.

Finally, after a while, we went through to THE LIVING ROOM. YES. A CHAIR. A SPEAKER. WE ALL KNEW WHAT THIS WAS. ME, EMMA AND FLORA HAD A LITTLE SUPPORT NETWORK GOING ON BECAUSE WE WERE ALL HOLDING HANDS BECAUSE WE WERE NOT PREPARED AT ALL. I cried - yeah she wasn’t even here yet and I cried. So anyway THEN I’m like I can’t even do this and my heart is beating abnormally fast. And that’s when she appeared…

I COULDNT BELIEVE MY EYES. MY ANGEL. MY EVERYTHING. GENUINELY LIKE A METER AWAY. NO WAY. Okay so then I SOBBED even more and I was uncontrollable (I finally did calm down but omg it was so hard I couldn’t stop crying) - thank you Emma and Flora for helping me LOL. Side note: her hair was so curly and pretty and she wore this camo dress thing and SNAKE BOOOOOOTS and a snake ring and yeah I was like GO GURLLL. IN THAT MOMENT I DIED IT WAS ACTUALLY HAPPENING.

On to the album, obviously you guys understand I can’t say much at all BUT REPUTATION IS MY FAVOURITE ALBUM BY FARRRRR. Like it’s genuinely so different but so genius - it’s incredible. She’s so talented and you can tell she’s worked so super hard for it and I can tell she’s happier than ever through the way she talks and she just seems so content with life and it makes me so proud and happy of how far she’s came. It’s so emotionally complex and THE LYRICS (she’s a genius okay). But there was one song that made me full on SOB and everyone in that room felt something…ANYWAY Taylor herself, during the whole of the session, she was so funny and she’s just so genuine…it was unreal. UNREAL. Some highlights that stand out to me include when during one of the songs she looked right at me for about 20 seconds or so and we just danced and smiled at each other. IVE NEVER FELT SO LOVED IN MY LIFE. To say I’m proud of her for this album is an understatement.

okay so then….IT WAS MEET AND GREET TIME. We were all sitting reading the magazines and talking to each other and it was adorable and even though I was a nervous wreck, everyone was so nice and amazing towards me. When it was time for the picture I was at the waiting point I can’t tell you how I felt. It was indescribable. I seen the 2 girls before me hug Taylor goodbye and it was my turn. I ran up to her and hugged her so hard and she looked at me and went “ITS ABBIE ISNT IT?” AND I WAS NODDING AND I WAS LIKE YEAH ITS ME and she was like “NO WAY I CHOSE YOU LIKE A YEAH AGO LIKE SOOOO LONG AGO” and I was like NO WAY and then I was like “THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING YOUVE HELPED ME THROUGH, YOU’VE HONESTLY GOT ME THROUGH SO MUCH” and she was listening so intently and she smiled at me and hugged me and we held hands for a few seconds which was BEAUTIFUL and she was like “you are SO beautiful like SO beautiful and you are SO funny like you’re posts are hilarious” and I started shaking and I told her she was like a big sister to me and then we got a really cute huggy picture and then we got one with my mom which was cute and THEN (THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST MOMENT) the camera guy said to my mom “do you want a pic alone with her” and my mom was like “oh it’s okay I’m just her mom” and TAYLOR WAS LIKE" OH WELL THANKS" IT WAS SO FUNNY. THEN I told her I loved her and she was like I LOVE YOU BUDDY and I gave her one final hug before I left which was MAGICAL (I swear we hugged about 27468273 times).

As soon as I left the room, I BURST INTO TEARS I COULDN’T BELIEVE I HAD JUST MET MY IDOL AFTER LIKE 6 YEARS OF LOVING HER AND FANGIRLING OVER HER. My mom went to talk to mama swift and she said to her “thank you so much for making a beautiful, amazing role model for my daughter” and mama swift was like AWWW THANK YOU SO MUCH THEN MY MOM GAVE HER A HUG AND THEN I GAVE HER A HUGE HUG AND MAMA SWIFT WAS LIKE THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING HER AND DOING THE CRAZY THINGS SHE MAKES YOU DO AND I CRIED MORE.

WE THEN WENT TO GET OUR MERCH AND GET ON THE BUS AND I WAS GENUINELY STARSTRUCK AND ME AND EMMA JUST KEPT LOOKING AT EACH OTHER AND BEING LIKE DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN?!?!?!

Taylor,
Thank you so so so much for inviting me to your London Secret Session - it was an HONOR to be there. I can’t believe I was given such a beautiful, amazing opportunity and I meant everything I said to you in there and it truly came from the heart. I love you so much and I can’t wait to hopefully see you on tour. You mean the world to me and I can’t wait to hear reputation again and DIE ANOTHER MILLION DEATHS.
I love you so much girl.

Abbie x @taylorswift

Sheriff Knows Best

Stiles/Derek, G, 2K words, Sheriff POV, Coffeeshop AU, matchmaker!Sheriff

(Credit for the title to @cobrilee!)

This is an expansion of the following idea, written by the lovely @artemis69:

the coffee!AU, where John goes to the same coffee shop every day, and there is this very grumpy, quiet barista that always makes him amazing coffee and keep the best pastries for him. And one day the Sheriff learns that Derek is the one to bake them all, so he decides: this will be my son in law, I need a reason to have this man in my family for at least forty to fifty years. Then he matchmakes with no subtility whatsoever, basically offering his only son on a silver plate, Stiles spluttering all the way (but he takes Derek’s number anyway because the guy is just amazingly cute)

John’s on his regular morning stroll when he stops in his tracks and takes in the brand-new coffee shop, complete with a banner advertising their opening day. The little corner space has been boarded up for over a year, and John had no idea it was opening today.

Any new businesses are a boon for Beacon Hills, especially family-run ones like this one is rumored to be, so John ducks inside. It’s warm and homey, and there’s a pair of young dark-haired people behind the counter, close enough in features that they’re probably siblings. The quiet bickering points that direction, too.

They stop, though, when they see the Sheriff—the uniform tends to have that effect—and he pastes on his public servant smile. “Hi there. I saw this place was open and wanted to come on in and introduce myself. Sheriff John Stilinski.”

“Oh, it’s so nice to meet you,” the woman says, holding out her hand for a shake. A nice strong grip—John likes this girl already. “I’m Laura Hale, and I own this place with my brother Derek, our resident grumpy barista-slash-baker.”

Derek rolls his eyes at Laura, but his smile to John is genuine, if small. “Hi, Sheriff. Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise, son,” he says, perusing the case full of tempting sugary treats. “You made these?”

He nods. “Can I get you anything?”

John hums. “A medium coffee, and…any one of these delicious-looking goodies. You pick. Just don’t tell my son,” he adds, and Derek looks up at him.

“Your son?”

“I have slightly elevated cholesterol,” he says, stressing the word. “Nothing to worry about, honestly. But he polices my diet. I don’t think he knows about this place yet, though, so this is great.”

Derek hums. His tongs hover over a muffin—lemon poppyseed, it looks like—before moving to another one. Raspberry-almond, according to the sign, and well, John isn’t picky. Derek drops it into a little bag and hands it over.

“Happy to help,” he says.

John thanks him and opens the bag. Laura’s still pouring his coffee, but it smells so damn good that he can’t resist.

“Wow,” he says, his mouth full. “This is delicious.”

Derek looks quietly proud, and Laura claps him on the shoulder as she reaches over to hand John his coffee. “On the house, today, Sheriff,” she says. “Thanks for stopping by.”

“I’ll be back tomorrow,” he promises.


“Thanks, Nina,” John says dryly, leaning back so she can put his plate in front of him.

“You’re welcome, Sheriff,” she says with a friendly smile, ignoring his stink eye.

Stiles just grins at both of them and digs into his French toast. He insists on having their weekly father-son breakfast at Paulie’s Diner because no matter what John orders, Nina will only bring him an egg-white omelet with a dry English muffin. Stiles must have some serious blackmail or be paying her off somehow, and John is, he has to admit, grudgingly impressed.

“Don’t look so bummed out, Pops,” Stiles says, around a mouthful of what’s surely syrup-drenched deliciousness. “At least I let you have turkey bacon.”

“It’s not the same,” he says grumpily, poking at it. “But at least I’m getting a steady stream of baked goods now.”

Stiles glares at him. “Are you serious? From where? I thought I had paid everyone off.”

He knew it. “I’m not telling you,” he says, a little displeased with how childish he sounds.

“Fine,” Stiles says, sniffing. “I’ll figure it out, you know I will.”

He will, John knows. Goddamn, he loves his kid, even if his life goal seems to be depriving John from any and all delicious food. “And speaking of, I met someone the other day,” he starts, and Stiles gasps theatrically, his hand coming up to cover his mouth.

“Is this you crapping all over my dream of having Melissa as my stepmom?”

John sighs at the reminder. Melissa is…well, she seems happy with that Argent guy. Whatever. He’s not bitter.

“Not for me, Jesus,” he says, shaking his head. “For you.”

“Oh my god,” Stiles says, slumping back in the booth. “Eye roll” is too mild, John thinks. It’s more of a whole head roll. “Seriously, Dad, I’m only 25. You don’t have to marry me off quite yet. You’ll get your grandchildren someday, I promise. Stop trying to set me up with people.”

“I’m just trying to be helpful!” John protests. “He seems nice.”

And makes really good treats, he adds in his head. That’ll be a good trait for a son-in-law.

“And who exactly is he?”

John pauses. “I met him at the aforementioned undisclosed location.” 

Stiles snorts. “Find out if he actually likes dudes, then get back to me.”

“Okay,” he says seriously, and Stiles grimaces.

“No, Dad, don’t actually—”

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Valentine's Day HC

This is my Valentine’s Day present for @sleepingupsidedown blame her for the suffering

-Lance has everyone’s back

-Even if no one ever really talks to him but Hunk

-Keith goes to Allura or Shiro because god forbid he talks to anyone else

-Allura goes to Coran and Coran goes to Allura

-Shiro only goes to Keith

-Pidge goes to Hunk or Shiro

-Hunk can talk to Pidge, Keith, Lance , and Shay

-Lance well, when it comes to the real important stuff, the homesickness, feeling inferior, a burden, a seventh wheel, Lance has no one

-Lance tries to form close bonds with the others but they never give him the chance, and those that do he doesn’t want to hurt by telling them of how unhappy he is

-Or he feels the horrible tension that seems to constantly be around them so he takes it upon himself to be the comedy relief

-The reason he flirts is because it makes him feel closer to his brother who taught him all those awful pick up lines

-He’s used to being overlooked it happens when you have a big family, it can’t be helped

-So when they finally have a moment to stop and relax Lance isn’t all that bothered that everyone naturally paired off only leaving him alone

-Lance then decides to simply go to his room, have some me time

-When he finally has his mask on he finds that he has tracks down his face mask(HIS VERY EXPENSIVE AND RARE FACEMASK MIND YOU)

- Cursing he realized it was wet with his tears

- He rushed to fix the mask and try to stop his crying but he finds that he can’t

-He can’t stop crying

-He can’t breathe

-He can’t hear the music he put on earlier

-He’s on the floor

-He doesn’t know what’s wrong and yet he remains quiet, rides it out by himself because who can he tell

-So he waits for what feels like forever to be able to breathe again

-Then he just waits for the panic and blind terror to subside

-And when it’s all over he gets up, the timer went off, it’s time to take off the face mask

-He doesn’t want to be alone anymore

-He doesn’t want to be there

-He wants to be in his mama’s arms

-He wants to listens to his siblings trying to make him laugh

-He wants his dad to be making him chocolate caliente

-Hell he just wants someone to talk to

-He just wants someone in the spaceship to have his back for once

-Someone who is genuinely interested to see him or just listen to everything be it good or bad

-He wants too many things that will never come to pass

-So instead he lays back in bed until the next battle because what else is there to do?

-What Lance doesn’t know is that it’s his birthday

-Everyone went and paired up to go prepare the surprise party for Lance the flirt who just happened to be born on Valentine’s Day

-Hunk went to go make the cake with Coran

-Pidge went to find some dank memes

-Allura,Shiro, and Keith went on to decorate the common space

-What Lance doesn’t know is that they all love him and appreciate him

-What Lance doesn’t know is that Keith planned all of this after Hunk let it slip that Lance’s birthday is on Valentine’s Day

-What Lance doesn’t know is that Keith plans to tell him how he feels about him

-WHAT LANCE DOESN’T KNOW is that the reason no one has had time is because they have been busy trying to hunt down the beauty products the know Lance loves or anything that brings him happiness to be honest

-You see Hunk isn’t making an Altean cake, oh no, he managed to find more than half of the ingredients to make Lance’s favorite cake, a tres leches

-Pidge found at least 3 new face mask made by humans for humans

-Allura is giving Lance a book she’s been writing with all the pick up lines Lance has ever directed toward her because she doesn’t know when but at some point it stopped being annoying and it started to be endearing

-Shiro is giving Lance the chance to give himself a nickname that Shiro will use from then on but it must be appropriate

-And Keith….. he has a whole letter were he wrote down all the feelings he knows he won’t be able to ever say to him

-Just hundreds of words stating how much he loves him and how sorry he is for ever forgetting him

-Asking Lance if he will take him, God please allow him to have a special place in his heart

-So Lance doesn’t know that when he is finally feeling as if he can actually maybe function that the others have Hunk going to his door to coax him out of his room

-But when Lance learns about all of it, learns that he’s not alone and the others have his back

-Now his tears are from happiness and a spark of hope that not everything is impossible

-And yes he does have enough space for Keith, why wouldn’t he?

blue orchids

hanahaki & soulmate au (reposted)

pairing: jungkook | reader
genre: angst and a sprinkle of fluff
word count: 18.748
warnings: implied smut
disclaimer: I do not own the hanahaki disease concept.

I am immensely thankful for the talented people who have created art / edits for this story: x, x, x, x, x, x ♡ also, make sure to read moonlight (drabble from jimin’s pov) and home after rain (short sequel) after reading this story. enjoy!


You were eighteen years old when Jimin’s name showed up on your hand.

The day is fresh and clear in your memory: early December, the winds stronger than ever as they threatened to pierce through the windows of your room, hints of snowflake dancing in the air as the first snowfall augured an even sharper winter. There was a smile on your face that didn’t match the unrelenting coldness of the month, and even though the night was falling and the air felt icy on the tips of your fingers, there was only warmth in your chest as you went through the pictures of your phone.

Pictures of you and Jimin drinking hot chocolate, of clumsy iceskating, of funny faces that made you laugh out loud in the quietness of your bedroom. The feeling sparking in your chest could be considered somewhat dangerous— after all, you were just a girl that didn’t have any marks on her skin, a girl whose fate was yet to be decided. Something as enigmatic as love could be a treacherous thing, too risky for someone that couldn’t decide their destiny on their own.

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Forgotten (M)

Originally posted by mayfifolle

Summary: Loving Kim Taehyung was just so cruel, since he only saw you as his childhood friend. But after years of wanting him to return your affection, you finally saw the look of love shine on his eyes - but it wasn’t meant for you. No, it was meant for her…
Pairing: Taehyung x Reader
Genre: Smut, Angst, bestfriend!au, university!au
Word Count: 4.5k
A/N: Original request here . 


Loving Kim Taehyung was like treasuring a forbidden artifact – you could appreciate it and love it from afar, but you could never touch it, never have it – just stand still and admire from a distance. Just like the artifact, he was untouchable and you could never have him the way you always wished for. Why? Well that was because he was your best friend since you were toddlers, but that was it.

You two were inseparable. Always playing and working together, making your classmates assume that you two liked each other. Of course, every time that accusation was made, you’d both deny it while saying how gross it was – but even then you knew you were lying.

At the mere age of 14, you realized that you didn’t just have a silly little crush on him anymore, no, you had fallen deeply in love with him. But who didn’t? His affectious boxy smile and playful bright attitude attracted many people towards him over the years, much to your dismay. But Taehyung always brushed it aside, and kept his attention solely on you. That is, once you two entered high school, then it all changed for the worse.

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Possible-Future-Girlfriend

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky claims you can’t flirt for shit, you prove him wrong

Word Count: 2164

Warnings: pure fluff

Author’s Note: this is one of the first fluff i’ve written, i hope you enjoy (re)reading it :)

Masterlist Here

Sometimes you never really understood James Buchanan Barnes.

What is going on inside that pretty little head of his? What keeps him up all night sometimes. He’s assured you that it’s not the nightmares anymore. Those are the things he left in the past, along with all the terrible memories. But let’s not get drifted off to the apprehensive shit here. You have much important things to concentrate on.

Bucky Barnes is much happier now. He jokes around, flirts with girls at clubs or parties or any other place. He loves the cinema, especially the TV shows - so much that he binge watches them whenever Bucky and you are hanging out at your apartment.

He’s catching up on the new technology, too. You and Steve bought him a new phone for his birthday this year and boy, he cannot stop clicking pictures on it. And you know snooping is wrong, but most of the pictures on his camera roll are of Steve, the New York City skyline and you. You were surprised at first, but this man practically spends every free second of his time with you, so that was enough of an answer. Plus, you’d be lying to yourself and the rest the world if you’d say that your phone gallery isn’t stacked with pictures of Bucky.

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Mi Amor

 Daveed Diggs x Latina!Reader

Requested by anon: Hi. It’s the anon who asked about the Latina reader here. I was wondering if you’d do like where Daveed and the reader are really good friends but Lin knows she has a crush on him and he’s teasing her about it but daveed overhears them mention him and doesn’t understand them cause they’re talking in Spanish. He asked her about it or something and then fluff or smut! I don’t know…. Your other fics are amazing so I know this one will be to die for no matter what! Gracias!! ❤❤

Words: 3,675

Warnings: Swearing and SMUTTT. A LOT OF IT idk what else you want from me ahahaha

A/N: This was SO FUN to write but Idk I’m sorry if this was so bad lol I THINK I’VE OFFICIALLY MADE THE SINNERS CLUB LOLOL OKOKOK

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Hey what if instead of writing Lance as the only omega in the pack of alphas he’s the only alpha in a pack of omegas? 

Like, before Voltron, Lance was the leader of his own little pack. 

-

Lance met Hunk in school. They still shared a room, which was a surprised and a confusion. People thought Hunk was an alpha thanks to his size, so his papers were wrong and he was assigned to Lance. 

It was quite a shock for both of them. Hunk was clearly uncomfortable and Lance didn’t know what to do to help the omega relax. It was problem, because all the rooms were full and they couldn’t reassigned them. 

The first few days were… Something. Omegas were cruel to Hunk because he wasn’t as cute of delicate as them, and alphas often told Lance how lucky he was for having an omega there to fuck. 

Of course, Hunk recived the worst of it and Lance started feeling guilty. Hunk seemed like a really cool guy, and didn’t deserve to go through this. So, he went agaisnt the alphas that were talking shit agaisnt them and after that he talked with the omegas who were taunting Hunk. 

Things got so much better after that and after hearing from someone else what Lance had done for him, Hunk stoped avoiding him and started speding more time with him. 

They became the best of friends and it was perfect. Then they became closer and started sharing a bed. They didn’t realise then, because it was just the two of them… But they were acting like a pack. The often scented each other and felt the need to protect Hunk from everyone. 

Then Pidge arrived to the Garrison. There was something about her that Lance hated it. It was her beta smell, it was… Off. But Hunk had a soft spot for her, for some reason. And if Hunk trusted Pidge, then Lance could. They befriend her, since nobody else did. Pidge was kind to Hunk, and Lance appreciated that.

Hunk adored Pidge and those two became best friends. Lance was ok with, he was happy that Hunk had more friends. Pidge could understand the things that Hunk loved, and it was perfect. 

Slowly, Lance opened to her, and without realising she was part of his little pack and protected from everyone else like he did with Hunk. 

It was clear for everyone in the Garrison that they were pack, even when Pidge wasn’t aware of it. 

Still, Pidge had a mission. And she couldn’t let them distract her from it. She often reject them and tried to be on her own. She hurt Hunk and Lance with this, but they never complained about it. Hunk thought she was busy and Lance gave her space she wanted. 

Voltron happened time after that. They followed Pidge to the roofs because Lance was worried and curious. One thing lead to another and suddenly, they were running away from the Garrison in Keith’s bike, and omega Lance used to have a rivalry with and Shiro, an amazing alpha Lance admired and thought dead. 

They ended up in a shack in the middle of the desert talking about ‘Voltron’ and the next thing Lance knows he’s flying a Blue Lion and aliens are real and they are now paladins, protectors of the universe. 

It’s to much to swallow, but Lance is willing to stand up and fight for what’s right. 

The three of them, Lance, Pidge and Hunk, keep acting like a pack. Shiro and Keith are like a different pack even when Lance makes his best efforts to include them (even if that means stop being the leader of his pack and giving the leadership to Shiro, who has a bigger rank than him) they don’t seem to comfortable with them. 

Allura are Coran are easy. They don’t have dynamics, so they spend time with both packs. But it isn’t an ideal situation, really. Lance can feel his alpha side wanting to fight for power and territory, even when the only thing he wants is to everyone to get along. 

Things change when Pidge tells everyone about her real dynamic and to be honest, Lance is surprised but at the same time it isn’t. Everything makes sense to him now, and to prove Pidge he’s not mad at her for hiding the truth from him, he scents her for real this time. He kisses and nibbles her neck. He gets a wiff of her real scent under the beta-fake one. It’s like vanilla, and Lance loves it. 

Pidge melts in his arms and purss happily. Then Shiro clears his throat and speaks, telling everyone the truth about his dynamic and revealing that him, just like Pidge, is an omega. 

That was something Lance was not expecting. Shiro, the perfect Prime Alpha that everyone talked about. An omega. Amazing, really. They were all waiting for Lance’s reaction. Shiro was cleary tense, and Keith looked ready to attack. Hunk and Pidge were grabbing Lance from both sides, wary. 

“So, you are an omega…”

“Yes.”

“And you fooled the whole Garrison into believing you were alpha prime.”

“…Yes.” 

“Dude… That’s gold!!” Everyone jumps and looks at Lance in disbelief. He looked genuinely happy and curious about Shiro’s dynamic. The older omega relaxed and smiled, things didn’t go as wrong as he thought. “Wait… This means… Both of you are on supressants?”

Suddenly, there was silence again. Everyone was looking at both omegas with worried and Lance’s expression was one of anger. 

“Well, I used to be… When I was on Earth. But my omega scent hasn’t return, so I guess the Galra gave me something.”

“What about you, Pidge?”

“Well–”

“Taking something that covers your scent is one thing, but blocking your dynamic? Do you know how dangerous supresants are?!” 

Pidge whined and Shiro looked ashamed. Lance sighed. 

“I want both of you to go to Coran and ask him to check on you hormone levels and give you something to counter the supresants effects.”

After that things on the ship got so much better. Without Shiro and Pidge pretending to be something they weren’t, they found a new balance in the team. 

Lance started spending more time with Shiro. His omegas new Lance was only trying to make him feel comfortable around him and like that, to invite him little by little to his pack. Shiro was a bit obvlious to Lance’s intentions to be honest, but let the alpha be with him. 

Lance was different. He was loud and confident like most alphas, but he was caring and sweet to his omegas. He took care of Hunk and Pidge and never tried to use his alpha voice to force them do things they didnt want to and tried to take over the position as the head of Voltron. 

Shiro got closer to Lance without realising. He found himself one day wanting to invite the alpha to his nest. Of course, he felt embarrased to only think about it and instead of talking about it with Lance he stole one the alphas t-shirts and sleep with it. 

Of course, Lance finds about this and it only warms his heart when he finds Shiro in the couch sleeping with shirt. When Shiro wakes up, the alpha is sitting besides him playing with his hair. The omega blushes like crazy and tries to explain everything to Lance but he only chuckles and tells him there’s nothing to worry about. 

It’s a matter of days after that he scents Shiro and becomes an official part of his pack. 

Keith was more… Difficult to approach. The reason Lance went for Shiro frist, was because he thought if Shiro joined, Keith would follow easily.

… He was wrong. 

He was stubborn, and when Shiro joined Lance he only felt left behind. It took a lot of effort from Lance to make him understand he wasn’t trying to take Shiro away from him or something like that. 

Lance didn’t know how to deal with Keith, to be honest. The omega was something else, really. He liked to to fight, and didn’t give a fuck about Lance’s position he was ready to fight him in any moment. 

Lance wasn’t sure if he liked it or hated it. 

Keith avoided Lance, and even growled at him everytime he tried getting close. Lance was frustrated, all of his omegas could see how much it was hurting the alpha not to be able to reach Keith. 

It seems like an impossible tasks, but before Lance can give up, a mission go wrong. 

They were inside of a Galra ship. Everything was going smoothly when an alarms started ringing. They were caught and had to go to their lions quickly before the reinforcements arrived. 

Before Lance could reach his lions, all of them heard a horrible scream through the halls.

An omega.

His omega.

Keith.

Lance ran and ignored everyone. If Keith was scared enough to let out an omega cry, it means whatever thing he is happening is bad. Really bad. 

When he gets there he finds a big Galra over Keith, doing— Terrible things. Lance goes feral and gets rid of the Galra that’s hurting Keith. The omega is crying and a whimpering mess, and the alpha in his wild state of mind only manages to carry him to his lion and let Blue fly them to the castle. 

It takes a while for both of them to leave the Blue Lion. Keith clinged to Lance trying to feel safe and the alpha kissed and licked his scent glands until the only thing he could smell was himself on Keith. 

They went to the pods after that, since Lance was also badly hurt from the fight. When the pod opened, Keith hugged him and thanked him for everything. 

He didn’t need to say anything, Keith was part of them now. 

love letters ❥ peter parker

summary : peter, hopeless romantic that he is, has a cache of love letters, all addressed to you, hidden under his bed and expertly crafted. he never anticipated them being read, or the feelings he has for you being returned.

word count : 3.1k (holy fucking hell i’m sorry)

   Peter couldn’t help it, the way that he was. He was a romantic at a heart, though the awkwardness of him had a tendency to prevail rather than the confident, smooth talking, small part of him that had a desperate desire to reveal itself. Spider-man was as suave as a fifteen year old boy could be; Peter Parker was awkward, inept at participating in normal, human conversation and often incapable of forming coherent sentences more often than not. He wasn’t the best at talking to people besides Ned and Aunt May and- on occasion- Tony Stark. Especially not you. If there was one person that he turned into an absolute bumbling, ridiculous mess around, it was you. He loathed himself for it, sure that you thought that he was weird, annoying, the same way that anyone who didn’t know him assumed he was. 

   Ned, however, continuously insisted that you found Peter to be a sweetheart, like anyone who got to know him well enough did, and that you liked him very much- perhaps more than a friend, though Peter had immediately scoffed at the notion. It was out of the question, downright ludicrous. But, of course, Ned had implanted the idea in Peter’s head, and now the boy’s ever creative mind refused to stop constructing various scenarios in which you were Peter’s girlfriend and he was as happy as he had ever been. 

    While he had been a perfectly charming boyfriend in each and every one of those little dream sequences of his, he was hopelessly lost for words whenever you approached him, unable to even ask what class you had next, let alone reveal the pure adoration he had been holding on to ever since you had been placed beside him in Bio in your freshman year. You had always been the one to stick up for him and smile at him and treat him like a decent human being, and so of course he fell for you, and now he could barely look you in the eye without his cheeks turning a lovely shade of pink. So, he bottled his feelings and let them out in a way he had never known could help him.

    He wrote. 

    He wrote to you every single day and poured his heart out in every single letter and expressed every thought he knew, in his heart, he would never be able to say out loud. Writing what he felt was so much simpler than saying the words out loud. That was what he assumed, anyhow. He took his pen and placed it down on the paper, starting it the same way he always did. 

   Dear Y/N… As always, the words spilled over from his mind to the paper as if he wasn’t thinking, just writing and writing and writing until he had filled two pages without lifting his curly head from the paper once. When he finally finished, a yawn stretching across his mouth, he noticed Aunt May standing outside his door. He turned his chair around, raising his eyebrows at her. 

   “Writing to that pretty girl again?” She asked, hand on her hip but wearing a knowing, soft grin. Peter, not bothering to feign shock, nodded solemnly and placed his pen down the paper. “You should think about maybe, oh I don’t know, actually giving her one of the letters you’ve written?” 

    Adamantly, Peter shook his head. “May, I could never. You don’t get it.” He swiveled around in the chair, spinning it until he was dizzy. “These letters are embarrassing. They’re practically my whole heart and soul on a piece of paper. She’d scream and run away if she read how I felt about her.” He sighed, placing his elbow on the edge of the desk and resting his cheek in his hand. He stared up at his aunt, still craving her sage advice. May stared back at him thoughtfully. 

   “Well, in my personal experience,” she came over and gave Peter’s shoulder a squeeze, eyeing the letter that was signed with Peter’s name, “girls are suckers for love letters. And you Parker men write the best ones out there. Trust me.” 

   Peter bit his lip. “Yeah, sure, I’m not an awful writer. But, I still can’t give them to her. I just can’t.” Before she could say anything else, he was folding it up and placing it on top of the shelf on his desk next to his books for English. “Uncle Ben was different. He was charming. You know that.” 

    May smiled wistfully. “I do.” 

    “And that’s one thing that I didn’t get from him,” Peter finished, shrugging his shoulders as he stood up from his swivel chair. “It’s fine.” He waved it off. “I’m happy suffering in silence. I’m gonna go to bed. Big English project starts tomorrow. Love you,” he kissed May on the cheek as she left his bedroom, switching the light off in her departure. He stared at the wall once he was situated in bed, mulling the conversation over in his head. Maybe May’s right. Maybe telling Y/N wouldn’t be as bad as I’m thinking. Maybe I’m overreacting. Actually, never mind. She probably hates me. Ugh. Life sucks. 


    That morning, when he arrived in his English class, you were sitting in the seat that had been previously occupied by Ned pretty much every class since the beginning of the school year. Sucking in a breath, Peter took his first step into the classroom. He knew he was a little late to today’s lesson, but he hadn’t realized he was a full fifteen minutes behind schedule. Ned was in the back with Michelle, giving Peter an encouraging thumbs up when he noticed his best friend finally arrive on the scene. Peter gave him the finger. 

   “Mr. Parker, lovely for you to join us!” Ms. Matthews declared when he decided to shove himself through the door, his heart jackhammering away in his chest and making its way up to his throat. He kind of wanted to throw up. 

   “Um, yeah, well, you know, sleep and whatnot- overslept, haha,” he coughed out a laugh, scratching the back of his neck. The teacher nodded with faux sympathy, though he could tell she didn’t care that much for his explanation. “I’ll just, um, sit. Down.” 

    “Next to Y/N, please,” She instructed, waving her hand in your direction. “Since you were late and unable to choose your own partner, surprising since usually Ned is so eager to work with you, Y/N offered to be your partner.” The teacher gave you a fond smile, as every teacher did. “She can explain the details of the assignment.” 

    Peter gave her a stiff nod before sliding into his chair, and you noticed how rigid he was as he turned toward you with a slight frown. He seemed extremely upset to be working with you, but you wouldn’t let that get in the way. You liked Peter. Really, truly liked him. He was a sweetie whenever he actually talked to and different than the rest of the guys at Midtown. He was genuine.  

    Giving him your full attention, you beamed at him. “Hey, Peter,” you said cheerfully. He gave you a small smile in return, wringing his hands under the desk. He couldn’t stop fidgeting. Your own smile dropped, which he noticed immediately and felt awful about. “Sorry you didn’t get paired up with Ned,” you continued, taking your books out of your shoulder bag. “I know you would’ve preferred it that way-” 

    “No!” He interrupted quickly, practically slamming his hands down on the desk so hard you jumped in your seat, eyes wide. “Sorry, sorry, I just, um,” he laughed a little, his cheeks burning, “I’m, um, happy to have you as a partner. Really, I am,” he added as an afterthought, just to make sure you knew. 

   Your shoulders relaxed as you looked at him. “You’re not just saying that, right? You seem awfully stiff,” you teased, poking his uncomfortably positioned arm as you quirked a brow. 

    “Do I?” He was practically sweating. 

     “I was just joking, Pete. It’s cute, anyway.” Peter’s eyes, a shade of brown that you had come to think of as warm as honey, went wide and he gaped at you, but you pretended not to notice. “So, for the assignment we have to write a short story based on one of the assigned reading books this year.” 

   She called me cute

   “Shit… I think I forgot all of mine,” you were mumbling, your head practically stuck in your bag. “Did your bring yours, Peter?” 

   Oh my god, she thinks I’m cute. She thinks I’m cute. I’m going to faint

   You snapped your fingers in front of his cherry red face, trying not to appear as amused as you felt. He blinked owlishly, an apologetic half smile, half grimace on his face. He was cute most of the time, but especially when he smiled, even if it was only a forced, awkward one. “Do you have your books, Peter?” You repeated kindly. 

    “Um, sorry, I’ll check,” he answered, embarrassed about his utterly obvious staring that had just occurred. He rummaged around in his backpack before realizing he had forgotten them, as well. He popped back up, curls in disarray as his head brushed against the fabric of his bag. “I forgot them, sorry,” he ran a hand through his hair, messing it up even more. It was kind of adorable.

   “You need to stop apologizing for everything, Pete,” you laughed. “It’s fine. We can get started after school. My place or yours?” You were already packing your things, and before he could think about what he was about to do, he said, “Mine.”   

    “Cool,” you grinned again, a grin that made him want to smile for the rest of his life. “Which one of is doing the writing? Or do you want to split it?” 

    “You’re a, um, fantastic writer,” he told you, having read your submissions to the school newspaper more times than he could count. “If you wanna take over, you can. I can edit and stuff.” 

    “Aw, I’m not that good,” you shook your head abashedly, looking down at your lap. “But thank you, Peter. I’m sure you’re great, too, though. Are you sure you don’t wanna write some of it?”

    “I’m not much of a writer.”


    So, you were in Peter Parker’s room. He was having his third heart attack of the day, and was incredibly grateful that he had managed to keep his wits about him for majority of the day. He had only tripped over his words five times, tripped literally twice, and dropped his Metro card once, but it was fine. You helped him back each time he fell with your usual grace, barely acknowledging his multiple social faux pas and only laughing once because he fell over a small dog- which even he would admit was pretty funny. 

   Still, his palms were sweaty around you and he didn’t know how he was going to survive working so close to you for the next week while the English assignment was occurring. He lead you into his apartment and you noticed that his hands were shaking slightly as he twisted the keys in the lock. You walked into the apartment, the first thing crossing your mind was how cozy and homelike it was. You liked it very much. 

   “It’s really cute in here,” you said, smiling around the room as Peter busied himself with a glass of water. He downed it quickly. “Where’s your aunt?” 

   “Work,” he replied, catching his breath after the gulping down of his water. “Here, let’s go to my room.” He placed his glass of water on the counter and motioned for you to follow him, opening the door to his room and wincing at the mess in there. “It’s a mess, sorry about that.”  

   You rolled your eyes at him playfully. “Didn’t I say stop apologizing?” You entered his room as if you had been there many times before, taking your shoes off and setting them by the door. You threw your bag on his bed and took a seat in his swivel chair, and he liked how natural it seemed for you to be in his room. He liked how comfortable you were, sitting there. Something about it made him happy. 

   “Yeah, my bad,” he shrugged. You tilted your head, pointing your finger at him while he raised his hands defensively. “It wasn’t technically an apology!” He took a step out of the room. He was finally being normal around you, he realized delightedly. He would still need more water, though. He could feel his mouth getting dry. “I’m gonna get more water. Want anything?” You shook your head, spinning around in the chair as he left. 

   Your eyes scanned over his desk, taking in every inch of Peter Parker’s life. He had bad books stacked everywhere, his desk was a mess, there were clothes thrown about the room. Star Wars posters, Avengers posters, notes scattered across the desk. You admired the artful messiness of it all. You leaned up to where his English books were, spotting the one you were most interested in and yanking it off the shelf. As you did, a folded piece of paper fluttered down off the shelf, just when Peter was walking back into the room. 

   “I thought you said you weren’t a writer, Pete,” you raised your eyebrows at him, holding the letter in your hand and waving it at him. 

   He almost threw up right there. “Um, I’m not, please give that back,” he reached for it, but you jumped out of the chair, raising the letter high in the air. “Y/N!” He whined, grabbing for it again. “C’mon, please,” he pleaded desperately, pouting at you with such intensity it almost made you want to give it to him. 

    “Can’t I just read a sentence, Peter?” You pushed out your bottom lip, batting your eyelashes at him. 

     He almost gave in. “No, Y/N. Seriously, give it back.” He sounded scared now, upset as well. You pursed your lips, handing it back to him. He was so anxious about you reading it that it dropped on the floor, opening far enough so that you could see your name scrawled across the top in Peter’s defining chicken scratch handwriting. 

    “That says my name, so now I have to read it.” You stood directly in front of Peter, hands pressed together in a pleading motion, the expression on your face so genuinely interested that he had to give it to you. He picked it back up with a lump in his throat and handed it over, scared as ever. But this was what May had advised. Maybe she’d be right. 

    “Dear Y/N,” you read aloud in a loud, terrible accent, glancing back up at Peter as you read the line after that. He was staring down at the floor, preparing himself for what you were going to say when you read the letter, read his heart. You sat in his chair, realizing it’d be better if you didn’t read it so publicly. He sat down on his bed, waiting. 

   Dear Y/N. This is maybe the tenth letter I’ve written to you, and each time I say the same thing, so if one day you are reading this in proper succession, I’m sorry for being so utterly repetitive. You’ll probably never read this, though. And that’s why it’s so easy for me to write. I think you’re the only person to ever truly be interested in me when I’m talking about science. Not even Ned has an attention span that long. But you do. And you don’t know how much I want to thank you for that. You make it really difficult to not like you, to not be in love with you. I think that’s what it is… love. And if I’m not in love with you yet, then I’m certainly falling for you. Who wouldn’t? You’re a wonderful person without trying, you’re a beautiful hurricane, a sunset on the horizon of my bleakest hours, and you make me feel as if I’ve been standing in the sunshine for my entire life. 

   You put the letter down, smoothing it over your lap. You didn’t need to read the rest. That was enough. Peter gazed at you now, the way you’ve yearned to be looked at before, and you shamed yourself for being so blind these past two years. He wasn’t simply just staring. He was looking. Admiring. You slid next to Peter, placing the letter behind you. He moved his hand, curling his fingers around yours tentative as ever. Your free hand grazed up the side of his face, toying with the hair on the back of his neck before resting on his cheek. He shut his eyes. When he opened them again, you were so close that he was able to count each individual eyelash that you had, every single fleck of pure beauty in your deep eyes. 

   “I like you very much, Peter Parker,” you murmured. He felt his heart soar, and then, he felt himself kiss you. It was an out of body experience. He was there, he was the one kissing you, the one who had initiated it, but it felt like he wasn’t. He was up in the clouds, too far lost in the way it felt to run his hands through your hair as he had always dreamed of to notice Aunt May sneaking past the door, overjoyed to see Peter finally with the girl he had been loving in silence for far too long. You pulled away from each other, eyes opening slowly and hesitantly and your lips practically still connected. 

   He wanted to tell her that he adored her, but Aunt May’s voice flowed from the kitchen too loud to overpower his thoughts. “You read her the letter, didn’t you? I told you it’d work! Worked for your Uncle Ben and I was right as I always am!”

   He jumped up from the bed, sticking his head out of the doorway and pressing his finger to his lips. “Maaaayyyy, you’re embarrassing me,” he whispered-yelled, practically whined. “You were right, okay? Thank you, let me go get a girlfriend now. The girlfriend.” She beamed at him, but no one’s smile could shine brighter than Peter’s. 

    He retreated back into the room, and you were clutching the letter in your hands. You looked up at him hopefully. “I was thinking that maybe you could read me the other nine letters. If you’re up for it.” 

    Peter couldn’t possibly say no, taking a page out of his Uncle Ben’s book the way he should have done in the first place as he found the hiding spot for the stack of letters he had been writing for the past few months, sliding them over to you and feeling confident for the first time in a long time.

Scars

Originally posted by ethereal-baek

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 11484


Everyone is born with a soul mark somewhere on their body. Their soulmate has the same mark. New technology has been developed that can remove the mark, but at great cost.


The voices resonating within the small living room blurred together into white noise and faded into the aether, leaving the abrupt thud of your heart stopping as the only audible sound. The walls felt like they were crumbling around you, and the velvet couch you sat on seemed like it was swallowing you into its depths, encasing you in a suffocating darkness. The pain you had suppressed for so long came flooding back, spreading through your every nerve. You felt like your chest had imploded and your bones were caving in. Your entire body had shut down momentarily as Sehun’s last few words echoed through the husk of your skull.

“I’m going to get my soul mark removed.”

There were muffled voices, a few louder than the others, but you couldn’t decipher what was being said. Your brain - consumed by grief - didn’t allow for it. Someone had placed their hand on your arm to try and shake you out of your stupor, but you could barely feel the contact through your numb skin.

But then, his voice called your name, penetrating through the void. That one familiar voice that for so long had brought you happiness and sweet memories, but now, it tore your very being apart. The words that voice had spoken had severed the few ties to him you had left. But still, his voice had so much power and influence over you, and it finally brought you out of your trance. You blinked a few times, and suddenly, you were returned to reality.

This wasn’t a dream.

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Don’t Freak V

Originally posted by kings-of-my-heart

Steve Harrington x Reader

PART I | PART II | PART III | PART IV

PART V

AN: I AM COMPLETE TRASH. NO SURPRISE THERE.


Jonathan sat like stone, emotion vacant from his face while Y/N paced the living room.

Please say something,” She begged. Jonathan shrugged.

“I don’t know what to say,” Y/N sighed and nodded. A few moments passed before Y/N spoke again.

“He came by today,”

“What did he say?”

“I don’t know, I didn’t let him in,” Jonathan took a good look at her face, then laughed. “He tried talking to me through the mail slot in the door,” This had Jonathan full belly laughing. “Why are you laughing?” He had a grin on his face and shook his head in disbelief.

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2

Robert Small ~ aka Bad Dad/Knife Dad

(All info is culled directly from in-game references; gif was made by me - if you want to use it in something else, please ask &/or give me credit.  Thanks so much!  <3)

~ Background Canon ~

  • Seems to have little/no respect for people who sleep around and/or put sex before other, more important things
  • Was (possibly) in the Army
  • Has a Boston Terrier named Betsy (likes to pretend she’s a pit bull)
  • Likes to tell elaborate (and sometimes graphic) stories. (Are they true? No one but Robert knows.)
  • Knows how to fake people out (i.e. good poker face?)
  • Sends texts/messages like a teenager
  • Believes hitting a child would be despicable
  • Insists on watching movie credits to the VERY end
  • Has a daughter named Val who lives in Brooklyn; she works for some ‘news media online magazine thing’ and makes a lot of money doing it.
  • He’s unsure of Val’s age, but thinks it’s maybe 25 or 26
  • He refers to Brooklyn as ‘home’ (…so what does that make Maple Bay?)
  • Carries a fully-stocked first aid kit in his truck
  • Has an unconventional sense of humor
  • Has a tendency to say exactly what he means…and then pretend like he didn’t mean it
  • Not the most talkative of people, generally speaking
  • Thinks River has an ‘old soul’
  • His wife’s name was Marilyn; she died in an ‘accident’.
  • He has a ‘long, wicked scar across his pecs’ (supposedly from a bike accident with Val)
  • Has a tattoo on his left hand, shaped a little like a compass rose
  • The mention of cannibalism reminded him of the last time he went skiing. (Just another ‘story’?)
  • Claims his leather jacket has been in his family a long time, and that it’s ‘cursed’
  • Seems to have done a lot of thinking about killing someone.  “It’s not just their life, you know.  It’s their hopes and dreams draining away.  Every memory and experience they’ve ever had…gone.”
  • This guy may not look it, but he’s smart!  Knows who Hemingway is, has heard of capybaras, is a classic film buff, knows random Bible verses by heart…
  • Robert’s hands are calloused and covered in little white scars.
  • Got stabbed in Louisiana…or was it Kentucky…?
  • Isn’t a ‘sore loser’
  • Drives a VERY old red pickup truck.
  • House is filled with sleek, modern appliances; a big flat-screen TV; and shelves upon shelves of DVDs

~ Likes/Dislikes Canon ~

  • Has at least a mild interest in sports of some kind and a preferred team that he roots for
  • Likes Paranormal Ice Road Truckers, but isn’t a fan of TV in general
  • Likes war documentaries
  • Doesn’t like small talk
  • Doesn’t like being called Rob (…or Bobert) - ‘buddy’ seems to be okay?
  • Likes to go camping (but hasn’t been after what happened last time)
  • Digs old movies from the 30′s and 40s
  • Takes the creation of movies VERY seriously
  • Likes Tom Waits and Santana
  • Likes to whittle and is pretty good at it
  • Smokes like a chimney (if all the ashtrays in his house are any indication.)
  • Enjoys the Criterion Collection

~ Food/Drink Canon ~

  • Likes whiskey… A LOT - especially shots
  • When it comes to alcohol, rarely takes ‘no’ for an answer
  • Likes white zinfandel because it’s delicious, fruity, and refreshing
  • LOVES pineapple on his pizza
  • Enjoys bar-hopping
  • Thinks Jim and Kim’s is the best bar in town
  • Occasionally hangs out at The Coffee Spoon

~ Sex/Romance Canon ~

  • Talks dirty…very dirty
  • Enjoys leaving hickeys…lots of them
  • Rough enough in bed to leave a person feeling sore and ‘creaky’ afterwards
  • Enjoys biting
  • When his lover says ‘no’ or ‘stop’ he takes it seriously
  • Recognizes that he’s an emotional wreck/emotionally unavailable…and is honest about it

~ Memorable Quotes ~ 

  • “The key to being cool is acting like you don’t care about anything, but actually care very deeply about everything to the point where it’s debilitating.”
  • “Too many people think that they have to fill the dead air with noise.  Personally I think they’re afraid of the silence.  Or they’re afraid of what the other person is gonna think of the silence…learn to be comfortable with silence.”
  • “I respect your opinion.  And I will fight with my life for your right to say it.  But where’s your sense of adventure? Where’s your sense of taste?  Why won’t you love yourself?”
  • “The juciness of the pineapple paired with the tanginess of the sauce is a flavor combination that everyone should experience at least once, if not a thousand times more. Pineapple on pizza is one of the few things in life that I genuinely and thoroughly enjoy.  Please.  Please just do this for me.  No - do this for yourself.”
  • “That popcorn-ass drivel the mass media is shoving down your throat will only make you dumber and sadder.  You of all people should strive for a higher standard in the art you consume.”
  • “Are you kidding me? I would never hit a child.  That would be despicable.”
  • “This is my Thinking Bench.  I have to get a solid two to three hours of brooding per day.  Filling quotas…A lot of people underestimate the senses of a man who broods.”
  • “I’m so many levels of irony deep that I’ve forgotten what humor is.”
  • “I was so busy chasing after all of these things that I thought would make me happy that I didn’t think about anyone else.  All I cared about was myself.”
  • “Maybe I’m just built like this.  Or maybe I do it to myself.  Maybe it’s my own choice I’m as unhappy as I am.”
  • “I’m working on my relationship with existence.”
  • “Long live the king, baby.”
  • “I spent my whole life only taking, and taking, and taking.  And now here I am, an old, broken man sitting on top of a pile of everything I’ve ever taken.  Alone.”
  • “I spent so much time chasing after things I thought were gonna make me happy that I ruined my only real chance at happiness.”
  • “You know, every day for me is a battle against my own self-destructive habits.”

Mental breakdown tag lol

do I use this script or not

also vedj - still going, but will probably miss some days and that’s OKAY
I’m worried for this video, because rather than generalising mental illness as important, and needs to be talked about, I go into detail about the specifics of what I’m feeling. And it’s not pretty. If you can’t relate, and I hope you don’t, I’m going to seem very very strange. But mental illness isn’t simple, it’s not all let’s blow on thumbs together to stop these darn panic attacks, or this cute cartoon girl crying in a corner. It’s so much bigger and uglier and more complex.
I haven’t been making videos because I didn’t know how to when my head has been consumed and overtaken by what I’m about to talk about. But I think I’ve figured it out.
so here’s the thing
you may have seen on twitter
i mentioned that i haven’t really felt like i’m here since i was 17 in a vid recently
and then within the last week that sort of upped as a problem by like, 80%
i went to wales for some shoots, felt crazy the whole weekend, then came back and got very panicky about the fact that I was going mad
I had slept fine, and I kept expecting to wake up better, but I just didn’t
I’ll explain what this all actually is and how it feels in a bit, plz hold
so I got back, and knew that I felt messed up, so tried registering to the doctors
walked there, in my weird dream state, took a proof of address cause I knew I needed that, handed it in, and then they said that I needed proof of address within the last two months
i was teetering on the edge of tears and also feeling really weird so I think they must have thought I was actually insane
I forgot how to say thanks and bye so I think I just left, dunno
walked home, in this strange, bright dream world
tried finding proof of address, forgot how to talk to my housemate, scared she was going to notice that I was drunk, except i wasn’t drunk
and then my mum called and said dodie
are you okay
and I just sort of
broke
i was sobbing, rummaging through bin bags to try to find some sort of proof of address, on the phone to mum, and I decided to visit home home for some sort of familiarity, cause I used to feel so normal and alive in that house, when I was younger
so I went home home, crying on the train, panicking about the fact that I was going mad and all my friends were like dodie wtf
that was when I tweeted saying I needed a break
then I saw mum and started crying about the fact that I left my old bedroom bed in dovan flat, cause I just wanted my normal bed in my normal room so I could feel normal
and I came home but of course I wasn’t magically cured because going to that house is not the same as time travel
i’m not taking a trip to 2012 when I go home, as much as I want to, i’m a broken dodie visiting a broken house and a broken ish family
I even visited my old primary school which shut down, like, years ago, and I wandered around with hedy
I don’t think that helped, cause it felt like it had just, grown leaves and aged in like 20 seconds
it just made me feel even weirder
so what am I feeling? Okay. let me explain. Or try to.
here are a bunch of messages I have sent to friends of mine, to try and explain wtf this is
“i’m so tired
I’m just so tired I feel like I’ve been awake for 4 days And I don’t feel like I’m here I feel like I’m drunk Like I’ve had three wines and shots and beer and I’m tired and ready to go home and I can’t talk to anyone because I’ve forgotten how I usually talk
I don’t even look like me
Everything is so wrong and weird and scary
I honestly think I’m going mad
I can’t stop crying
I’ve got such a bad headache” to lucy
And I’ve just constantly felt like Drunk and blind You know when you’re hammered
And everything’s really bright and you can’t remember how to talk properly and you’re not really taking anything in cause you feel really weird and you can touch things and see things and talk to people but you’re not really There
I genuinely genuinely think I’ve gone mad
And I don’t know if I’m ever going to see things like normal again” to sammy
“Here’s the thing
I’m alive
I can breathe
I can eat and talk and sleep and see and feel
So I should be okay
And objectively, I am fine
So why am I not
It’s one of those things that I keep thinking about over and over to the point where my head is like is this really happening and then I’m like is WHAT really happening
I used to not understand mental illnesses at all
I was like
Just think of cats and rainbows
But now I get it
It’s so much deeper in your brain than cats and rainbows
I used to say if I ever got dementia or something id fight it
But how can you fight it when the it is the thing you’re using to fight with
Dodie has gone full blown mad” to jon
now, thanks to the last vid, and to google, I’ve found out what this probably is
and I’m trying my best to register and see a doctor and get therapy and sort this out and also
I know what you’re thinking
if you have no idea what I’m talking about, if you’ve never had anything even close to this, if you are mentally dandy
you’re thinking dodie
you sound mental
just shut up,
turn it off
you’re fine
you’re obsessing over nothing, you’re attention seeking, just stop thinking about it
firstly, I am so happy and thankful that you feel normal and happy and go and enjoy your life because you can
and secondly, I would do anything to turn this off and feel normal again, literally anything. But I can’t. not right now. I don’t know how.
so. here’s my plan.
I’m going to act fucking normal.
I can still sing. I am still alive, on this planet, even though I don’t feel like it. I still find things funny, I still can taste food, I can make jokes, and write songs and hang out with friends, even though I literally feel like I’m hiding something from everyone and I keep looking at everyone as if I’m a robot.
but I’m going to sort this out, somehow. I’m going to sleep before midnight and wake up before 9, I’m going to give myself weekends, I’m going to do mindfullness meditation at 11am, and Im going to go running at least twice a week and eat healthy and drink water and not drink too much alcohol and treat myself when I’ve done well and not overwhelm myself. And I’m going to go to a doctor, and then therapy, and deal with this. But this will not consume me.
Yeah I feel fucking weird. Bring it. I’m so done with the constant buzz in my head - why do I feel like this why do i feel like this why do i feel like this
I just do. And I can’t change it right now. It’s not going to turn off. and I can’t just stop the world until I feel normal again, because I’ll get to my 70s and be like well shit, I missed it all.
So I’m going to do the best I can. I’m going to make the videos that make me happy. And I’m going to laugh about the fact that I’m a bit mental. Cause what else can you do.

Whilst I type this I’m on the phone to my bank to get a statement sent to prove my address to go BACK to the doctors to prove I live here then get an appointment to get referred to therapists. The NHS may be free but it’s not bloomin easy lol.

gotta say making this video was super healthy for me. It was good to edit together and see that I can pass as a functioning human.

for you pt. 7 [m]

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Badboy!Taehyung, angst

Word Count: 5.3k

Originally posted by vminv


Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Final

Six Months Later

You walked down the hallway of the academic building slowly, the weight of the paper in your bag causing you to drag your feet. Each footstep bringing more and more uncertainty about the next chapter of your life. You noticed that the door to your professor’s office was locked, and a small sigh of relief escaped your lips.

You didn’t want to have to explain to him how all your interviews had turned to dead ends. You didn’t want to have to explain how you were still going to be stuck in this town. Stuck in the memories of the past year when all you wanted to do was move forward. There was nothing that you wanted more than leaving. If he could leave, so could you. But instead you had gotten hired at the coffee shop in which you first met him. Left to repeat the same memories over and over again.

And as you left the building for the last time, you didn’t feel any different. The emptiness that had filled your chest the day he left was still there. You held your phone up to your ear, the familiar number having been dialed like clockwork. “We are sorry, but the number you are trying to reach is no longer in service.” seared through your ears after the first dial tone.

You kicked at a rock while waiting to cross the street. There was no reason for you to continue to call that number. But there was still a large part of you that hoped he would come back. That when you called his voice would saying hello on the other end. But no one had heard from him. Not you. Not the boys. It was like he had erased himself from your universe.

Taehyung crept into your mind during your most vulnerable moments. Like when the sun hit your skin in the middle of the afternoon, reminding you of the hours you would spend sitting next to him in the front seat of his car. Driving the two of you around while blasting old music and singing along so out of tune that everyone else would stare at you from their cars.

You missed him when you couldn’t get a jar open, not because he was strong enough to open them. But because you would hunch over in fits of laughter as you watched him turn red in the face while trying to open it. He wasn’t much of a muscle pig, but you thought his effort was the cutest.

He was in the worn out t-shirt hidden in the back of your closet. A piece of clothing you didn’t know you had until your nose caught the smell of his cologne the first time Mina came over to your apartment to do your laundry since you hadn’t left your bed in weeks. You had her put it down, worried that if she held it for too long you would forget what he smelled like when he held you.

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Lance is a Boy #2

One of the last things Lance expected was for Coran to continue typing as if nothing had just been announced. Lance had braced himself for some kind of reaction but nothing came, it was only when his shoulders went down and his muscles released tension did he even know he was stiff in the first place.
“Ok so if you’ll just step into this healing pod, I gave it a blue hue so you’ll know it’s yours, it has your information in it so it’s optimized to heal you asap, if hunk came in it would still heal him but at a much slower rate, especially considered the differentiated sexes.” Lance stared at coran in shock and awe.
“So you just.
You’re just gonna
Yknow
Ignore the fact that I don’t have a….
Yknow.”
The only thing that greeted Lances question was a look of confusion from the old Altean, suddenly the realization graced his face. “Why would I? It’s your business if you’re a boy or a girl, I don’t care, to me your Lance; the blue paladin of Voltron,” he turned to Lance after opening the pod and put a comforting hand on his shoulder “and a great person.”
Lance blushed, not in a way you’d blush because of a crush, but because that was the easiest anyone had ever taken the news and after the fact respected him, his family didn’t even react that well, especially his…

Nevermind.
“Thank you Coran, thank you so much.” Coran gave a firm squeeze on Lances shoulder and he went to pull away but Lance hugged him, going under his arms. The altean had to reach up to wrap his arms around Lances shoulders, but only slightly.
“I really don’t understand-” he was lifted off the ground “oh my goodness!” There was laughter and coran was set back down. (Through a few aftermath giggles) coran continued “as I said I really don’t understand the fuss? Why are you so happy? Is this not a common opinion back on earth? Do people not get to choose their representation?” There was genuine curiosity in Corans tone. Lance walked into the pod as he answered.
“Well… not exactly? Some people are lucky and get families that don’t question anything, L-Like you! But then there’s families that just, don’t understand or accept you.” Lance broke his fluidity for a moment to mourn how he was treated, but continued before he got upset “I don’t know about on Altea but on Earth there are 2 sexes, Male and Female, you’re born as one of them and that’s how society expects you to act as you grow up, some of us, like me, are born in the wrong body or choose to act as the opposing gender they were assigned or neither of them, or both!” There was a brief pause. Coran had closed the pod and it suctioned shut, but he was still listening through a simulated intercom of sorts that allowed patients to talk to their caretakers, as Lance was doing with Coran right now.
“Earth seems strange.” He furrowed his brow .
“It really is,” Lance confirmed “how was it on Altea?” Curiosity over how Coran was reacting to Earth customs made The boy ask.
“Well, we’re all born, what’s the term on Earth? Asexual I think? We don’t really have an assigned gender, our marks on our cheeks, these.” He pointed to the small check under his eye. “These suggest what we may be when we’re older, boys, girls, the odd Altean had purple or green which suggested they were something else. Due to our unique ability to adapt and transform we can change our bodies almost at will, initially a power given to us so we could be diplomats, we used it for gender assignment as well. As you get older you choose what you would like to be and over the course of a month you change into whichever gender you choose, but there’s no shame in making a mistake.” Coran raised his eyebrows to Lance “in fact most Alteans had to change 3 or 4 times before deciding what they wanted to be, including me. It’s rare for someone to know who they were on the first try, but some did, even Allura thought she was a boy at first, though when she changed into a girl that’s where she stayed. I was a boy then a girl then a boy then neither then a boy, then I finally decided that that’s who I was. Maybe that’s why I don’t think it’s a big deal that you were born a female Lance, maybe I know what you’re going through to an extent, because I was so uncertain and no matter what I did it didn’t feel right until the last time, and at that point I was afraid to tell people because I’d changed my mind so many times.” He sighed and looked at Lance, “you are a boy right now Lance, right?”
Lance was standing in the healing pod, seriously examining every word Coran said, and hanging onto every syllable.
“Yes Coran, I am a boy.” He said solemnly.
“Would you like me to refer to you as a boy?” Corans voice was confident and confiding.
“Yes.” Lance smiled at coran who let the corners of his mustang rise and his teeth reveal a smile.
“I must go and finish dusting the vents, when you’re good to go the pod will open, feel free to sleep, endorphins will be released when you’re done so you wake up.” Coran put his hand onto the glass of the pod as a farewell and Lance let him go, not saying a final word.
There were thoughts racing through his head, occasionally of jealousy of the Alteans and their ability to shape shift, but he pushed it aside and thought of his team mates, would they think of him differently if they found out he was a girl? He knew he’d freak out if he found out one of them was, there’s no way any of them could possibly be a girl, if one of them were he’d spaz, he’d… he’d… he’d be happy to know that someone else knew what he was going through. But he’s not a girl. But he was, mama always said she wanted her daughter back, so he must’ve been a girl at some point right? Was it too late to change his mind? No, it wasn’t, but Lance wasn’t a girl, Lance was a boy, and deep, deep down, he knew it.

… To be continued…
Breaking the Rules - part 8

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary:  Modern!AU You hate James Barnes with a burning passion and the feeling is entirely mutual. Just when you think things can’t get any worse, you are tricked into attending his sister’s wedding as his girlfriend. Stuck with a bunch of strangers, you come up with a set of rules that are not going to last long.

Word Count:2,439

Warnings: the usual

A/N: Happy birthday @marvel—fangirl ! Hope you had a great day :) this is unedited bc I’m exhausted 

Breaking the Rules - Masterpage

Originally posted by thewintersadie

“Hello? Earth to Y/n! Are you still there?”

You snapped out of your musing and your two co-workers started to come into focus. Maria and Jarvis were standing next to you, both of them looked worried.

“You’ve been staring at the coffee pot for the past ten minutes,” Jarvis said as he put a hand on your shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“Oh, she’s not okay. She’s sick,” Maria laughed. “She’s been bitten by the love bug!”

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