shark drop

alright so the smh decide to start a vine account

  • first it’s filled with hockey practices, goals from past games, the works
  • then it slowly descends into madness
  • it starts with a vine of someone yelling “GO SHARKS” and chowder automatically dropping into the splits
    • that boy is magical
  • there’s a whole series where ransom and holster go around faber and introduce things incorrectly
    • this is the defunkifyer *points to laundry machine*
    • *on the ice*  this is our cold ass swimming pool
  • after that they start filming at the haus
  • this begins the occasional vine of one of them walking along the sidewalk or on the front porch yelling “FUCK YOU LAX BROS” across the street
  • endless kegster vines, obviously
  • also a series of lardo beating the shit out of people at beer pong
    • someone (dex probably) edits the videos so denzel curry’s ultimate plays in the background and when she wins the bass gets really loud… you know the ones
  • speaking of dex sometimes when he and nursey are fighting someone will start filming and then roll their eyes at the camera
    • one time their fight ends in them furiously making out on the couch
    • they’re all scarred
    • the rest of the team (all of them, they have to use a selfie stick) roll their eyes and shake their heads 
  • another series where it’s just tango asking questions into the camera
  • whenever bitty’s in the kitchen baking someone will run in and start blasting beyoncé to get bitty to drop everything and dance
    • holster: *walks into kitchen*
    • bitty: holster I’m not putting this down the cream has to be whipped continuously or else it won’t hold
    • holster:
    • bitty:
    • holster: *starts playing partition*
    • bitty: goddammi-
    • holster: FOR THE VINE, BITTY, F O R THE V I N E
  • going to the murder stop and shop and striking weird poses in the aisles
    • nursey is a Pro at this
  • when jack comes to visit there’s always at least one vine of someone saying “is that jack zimmermann?” directed to a random object before it pans to jack just staring at the camera
    • ransom: *points to lamp* OH MY GOD IS THAT JACK ZIMMERMANN???
    • jack: *looks to the camera like he’s in the office*
  • whenever one of them sees another across campus they’ll whip put their phone and start yelling the others name while zooming in on them
  • someone films bitty talking one time and he manages to say y’all 4 times within 6 seconds
    • they go around the team and everyone just looks at the camera and says with the most serious face “y’all”
  • when shitty comes to visit someone from the team films him just slowly losing his clothes
  • whiskey and tango makes vines of them lip synching in the car (with whisky driving, and tango in the passenger seat)
    • songs range from I look to you by whitney houston to love is an open door from frozen to wake me up by evanescence
    • sometimes one of the frogs will join them and they’ll have choreography and everything
    • its impressive 

anyways so this got out of hand but my main point here is that the entire smh are meme loving fucks that laugh at their own vines

vine

Drop the pocket like it’s hot

6

“Can you see?” - - Minhyuk endorses a game about hungry sharks

DONT SEE THE SHALLOWS

Please don’t see the shallows, please don’t support this film, don’t support demonisation of sharks. They are important and they are disappearing, after Jaws in 1975 Fear and ignorance has caused declines in nearly all shark species over the years, populations of many species of sharks have dropped by 50 percent and some have fallen by as much as 90 percent. The shallows will inspire the same fear and ignorance and we cannot afford to lose sharks, the film portrays an animal that we know doesn’t exist: sharks are not mindless killing machines, sharks do not actively hunt humans. Don’t feed into the lie that these animals wish us harm, stop pushing the surfing dickhead agenda who think swimming in the ocean is more important than these incredibly important animals. Please don’t support The Shallows.

why do dudebros on youtube enjoy destroying iphones so much????? they’re always like “will this iphone wrapped in kelp survive the digestive system of a shark after being dropped in lava??” zachary we all know what’s going to happen here, you aren’t a scientist, you’re just a rich boy with a fetish for destruction and you need to chill