You know, looking deeper into Lance’s and Keith’s love of sharks and hippos is kinda cute. Because sharks are often viewed as dangerous, loner animals with most people viewing them as terrors of the ocean even though tons of divers and marine biologists have stories of sweet and soft sharks liking belly rubs, while hippos seem like big cute softies who wouldn’t hurt a fly but are one of the most deadly animals on earth. What I’m trying to say is Lance’s and Keith’s favorite animals are literally each other and that’s FUCKING ADORABLE AND KLANCE IS CANON
Friend or food and rubs! \owo/ (also cuddles but that'd be mostly on the outside eheh)
Friend or Food: Do you consider the prey you swallow sentient beings who deserve respect or simple sustenance?
“WELL. It depends, really… Friends get special treatment and respect… sometimes the nice strangers I can make an exception. But anyone else is filler for my insides, heh.” Rubs: Do you enjoy a little internal massage from your prey?
“Oooh…. y’know, I’m glad you asked.. cus I sure do— and I think you’d be perfect for that job, hehheh~”
Brutis strolled down the beach, enjoying the bright and warm
sun shining on the perfect beach day. The great white shark, sporting a red
vest with torn sleeves that exposed his large belly and brown swim trunks, was
also carrying an inflatable mattress and a foldable chair. He found “his
spot”—the same place that he set up his base camp every time he went to this
beach: perfectly positioned for optimal wind flow, sun angle, and access to the
water. He set down his mattress and unfolded his beach chair, and sat down to
relax. He leaned back, put on his sunglasses, and put his hands behind his
head. “This is the life…” Brutis said with a contented sigh. He closed his eyes
took in all the great beach sensations—the salty smell of the ocean, the
crashing sound of the waves, the rush of the breeze…
Suddenly he heard a familiar loud growling noise. He looked
down at his exposed belly as it growled hungrily, and he rubbed it. “Really, I
just sat down and you’re hungry again?” His belly tersely replied with a short
groan, and Brutis scowled at it. “Well I’m not getting up so you’ll just have
to wait.” He put his hands behind his head again and leaned back, but was
jolted again by an even more extreme roar from his rotund tummy, and he wrapped
his arms around it.
“No, I won’t let you bully me into leaving the beach when I
just got here!” Brutis decided to do something to take his mind off his hunger.
He stood up, slipped off his vest, grabbed the inflatable mattress and walked
towards the water. He waded out a ways before he lumbered onto the floating
rectangle, laying on his back. He gave a relaxed sigh as he felt the waves
rocking him and the sun warming his exposed torso and face. He closed his eyes
again, and got a brief bit of rest before he heard his midsection again.
Brutis did his best to ignore it. He shut his eyes even
harder, forcing himself to think of anything other than food. But try as he
might, his brain kept working its way back to different food items: chocolate
cake, donuts, steaks, burgers, shakes…
Brutis groaned as he placed both his hands on his belly, as
if it would silence the noises emanating from it. As his round middle continued
to growl and grumble, he could feel it rippling and moving underneath his
hands. He rubbed his hands in concentric circles on his tummy in hopes of soothing
it into quietness, but his gut resisted. Within minutes, his belly had
progressed from a periodic growl to making a near constant roaring sound, as if
it we conveying anger and contempt at Brutis for not giving in to its demands.
He sat up on the floating cushion and looked down at his belly in exasperation.
“I don’t know what you want me to do, there’s no food out here in the ocean.” RRRUMMMBLLEEE!! said his belly as it
wobbled violently, shaking the raft a bit. “And there won’t be anything on the
beach either, the burger place is a mile awa—“
Suddenly, the shark was cut off mid-though by a wonderful
aroma that wafted past his nose. It was the unmistakable smell of a beef patty
freshly sizzling on a hot barbeque. His mouth watered profusely, and his belly
grew even louder in protest of its emptiness. His head instinctively turned
towards the beach, tracing the smell. As he did, he pinpointed the source of
the delicious smell: a family of three on the shore, the father placing the
patties on the barbeque while the mom and son looked on, playing in the sand.
Even though they were a bit of a ways away, Brutis could almost hear the
patties sizzling as they hit the hot metal, and the image fired up his belly
again, wobbling and shaking so much that he nearly fell off the floater.
Not that that would have mattered, because at that moment
Brutis’ instincts took over. Without even thinking, he rolled off the floating
mattress and into the water, and immediately began to swim toward shore. As he
reached the shallow water, he stopped swimming and stood on his feet and began
wading forwards, his eyes hazy and locked on the meaty treasure before him. He
barely noticed as his belly also emerged from the water—free of the water, its
noisy complaints became audible once more, the wobbles of his belly causing
ripples in the water.
Meanwhile, on the shore, the cooking dad was placing the
freshly cooked patties in a stack on a platter when he began to hear the
strange growling noises. He turned around, and cried out in fear as he saw the
impressive sight of the large great white lumbering towards him. The mother and
son also noticed Brutis heading towards them as he fully exited the water,
mouth dripping drool and his hands stretched out in front of him. It didn’t
help they were also mistaking the non-stop growling from his belly as coming
from his mouth instead. Without much hesitation, the family let out a terrified
scream, grabbed a few of their valuables they could carry, and ran off towards
By the time the family had started the car and driven off,
the hungry shark had reached the picnic site. He stopped in front of the pile
of burgers, which sat beside a separate platter of buns, pickles, and other
condiments. Brutis paused only for a moment, after which his belly reminded him
quite forcefully and loudly of the purpose of their trek. Brutis obediently
attacked the smorgasbord, shoveling the food indiscriminately into his mouth,
patty after bun after condiment, and on and on. He nommed the food noisily as
he shoved it into his maw.
A few short minutes later, there was no more edible items to
be found, except a few crumbs around Brutis’ mouth. He stood there for a couple
moments before the haze of hunger that had overtaken him began to fade. He
blinked a few times and shook his head. “Wha… what happened…?” He looked down
and saw the ravage place settings, wiped the crumbs off his mouth, and looked
down at his belly, which was a little bigger than he last remembered it and
gurgling happily. “Oh man, not again!!!” he shouted with exasperation. This
wasn’t the first time his hunger had made him eat things without him knowing,
and he panged with guilt over scaring the family as that memory returned. He
sighed, grateful at least that the family wasn’t there to berate him. He walked
over to his old spot, his belly full belly jiggling with each step, and slumped
down onto his beach chair. He looked down at his belly and angrily said, “You
can’t keep getting me into trouble like this.” His belly gurgled in response. “Fine,
fine, I promise to feed you more if you stop this madness.” His belly purred
happily, and Brutis rubbed it. He couldn’t stay mad at his belly. He closed his
eyes again, and this time drifted into a nice nap, his belly noisily working on
its new meal.
I just gotta say I lov... how nasty scary ur merfolk are.... it's hella realistic tbh I'm so passionate abt merfolk and ur doin the lords work thank u
sdkfjhs THANK YOU… I’ve always seen merfolk as less like the stuff youd see in the little mermaid altho thats cute. i always think of it like. this is a creature who was born and raised in the ocean, so…. not a human. If anything, i see them as part magical creature and part sentient beast!! and its really difficult as humans to not see ourselves in everything/make a design based of ours, but mermaids already have a fixed design as half human half fish lol BUT THANK YOU
THERE IS A SPECIES OF SHARK THAT IS BASICALLY A LIVING FOSSIL! It has remained basically unchanged for 100million years and lives at least 1KM down in the water. It has a HUUUUGE nose that is used like a metal detector BUT FOR FISH!
And the Blue Whale is the largest thing, that we know of, to have EVER existed on this earth! Bigger than ANY dinosaur ever (that we know of) it’s heart is the size of a minicooper and IT’S TONGUE WEIGHS AS MUCH AS AN ELEPHANT! BUT they’ve only got really really small throats and can’t swallow anything bigger than a grapefruit!
AND THERE’S ANOTHER SPECIES OF SHARK THAT ONLY HUNTS AT NIGHT SO DURING THE DAY BECAUSE IT’S GOT VERY ROUGH SKIN, FISHIES USE IT AS A SCRATCHING POST FOR ALL THEIR FISHIE ITCHES!
AND THERE’S A TYPE OF CRAB THAT FLOATS ABOUT AND IT’S THE DUMBEST LOOKING LITTLE FUCKER AND I WANT LIKE 6!
Oh oh! And Killer Whales are not Whales at all! But they’re CALLED Killer Whales BECAUSE THEY ACTUALLY KILL WHALES! Also, they’re the only species that we know of that plays with it’s food AFTER DEATH. Like, they will throw seal carcasses as high as they can out of the water, and NO ONE KNOWS WHY!
AND THERE’S TUBE WORMS ON UNDERWATER VOLCANOES THAT SUPPORT LIFE AT SOME RIDICULOUS TEMPERATURE THAT I CAN’T REMEMBER RIGHT NOW AND THERE ARE CRABS AND THINGS THAT LIVE THERE!
AND THERE’S AN UNDERWATER LAKE REALLY REALLY DEEP IN THE SEA AND THERE’S TUBEWORMS THERE TOO THAT ARE ALIVE AND THRIVING WITH NO ACCESS TO SUNLIGHT AT ALL!
And there’s a species of Seal that’s really really dumb and stays in the Antarctic all year round and so has to keep a breathing hole open in the ice, but in doing so wear down their teeth, chewing on the ice to keep it open. By wearing down their teeth like that, they can’t hunt as well. They are not a species made to last. Dumb things.
THERE IS A TYPE OF SEAL THAT WEANS IT’S PUPS IN ONLY 3-4 DAYS!
THERE IS A TYPE OF SHARK THAT CAN WALK ON LAND! It gets marooned when the tides go out because it hunts in the shallow rockpools and then the tides go out further and they get stuck. So they SLOWLY shut down all of their organs and basically walk their asses back to the sea SO THEY DON’T DIE!
The Lemon Shark, like mammals, give birth to live young, fed through a placenta in the womb. THESE SHARKS HAVE BELLY BUTTONS!
OH! And when a species of Ray wants to mate, they throw themselves out of the water and BELLYFLOP back in with a loud resounding BOOM to try and attract a mate!
I FUCKING LOVE SEALIFE!
AND THE BEST THING IS THAT WE’VE ONLY EXPLORED A FRACTION OF THE FUCKING OCEAN! AND ONLY 1% OF THE ACTUAL OCEAN FLOOR! THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS OUT THERE THAT WE DON’T KNOW ABOUT FISH AND SEALIFE AND WHAT MIGHT EXIST!
when I started writing poetry
I counted syllables in stanza fours
rhyming a and a ending in b and b
then like dickinson I died bored
I beat villanelles wearing a cape
I beheaded heroic quantrains
I serenaded the Shakespearean sonnet
now I’ve face fucked the cinquain
my life is chaos
my heart is a universe
my head is a flower that
never gets enough rain
my soul only wakes up
to the smell of fresh pain
being brewed in the morning
this pen is an arthis
this page is a cath
when they meet in a catalyst
of broken hearts and big bang
thoughts they become a
catharsis for things I dare
not speak otherwise
I’ve loved too much
to be an easy catch
I am not just another
fish in the sea
I’m an empty bellied
tiger shark waiting to claw
the bottom of your boat
I’ve hurt too much
to be a hard parker
this starter is bulletproof
this oil stays changed at
the first sign of dirt
these tires are properly
inflated to make you
never want to drive again
after I toss the ass around
a few corners
I always make sure you lose
more than your lunch
I’ve fucked too much
to be an easy fuck
I don’t just want to feel
your insides I want to
wear them as a three piece
suit that’s skin-tight-tailored
everytime I look in the mirror
I can never tell where your
smile ends and mine
my life is chaos
these pages are a PG
glimpse into everything
that lurks inside you too
you can paddle
you can floor it
you can hold on
but this heart will toss
yours from one black
hole to another
these wilted flowers
are just low maintenance
enough to make you think
you won’t be venused while
this penis will break you
in half with the darkest
intentions behind the sweetest
lips you will never want to