shark attack

Sharks: Not Vicious, Just Mouthy and Inquisitive

In lieu of all of the sensationalist shark media occurring out there this summer, let’s talk about shark behavior and, in specific, shark attacks and white shark.

Some basic white shark facts (and yes, Carcharodon carcharias is often also officially called the great white, but that just exacerbates all the media attention, so white shark it is). Whites are huge pelagic (open water) sharks that get on average 4-5 meters long, and their only known predator as an adult are orcas. They’re one of the longest lived cartilaginous fish known with a lifespan that appears to extend into their 70′s. They have hella tons of teeth and lots of rows of them, so that when one pops out the next just pops into place as if on a conveyor belt. A white shark’s bite force is something like 4000 pounds per square inch from a six-foot-long animal. (Thanks to wiki for all the basic facts). 

Have a white shark anatomical drawing from wiki, because while it’s nightmare-inducing, it’s the only thing about sharks that should be. 

People love to talk about sharks as these horrible monsters of the deep, eating everything they come across with gruesome abandon. This is just ‘perfect’ for summer, when sharks start showing up on beaches in the US and scaring the bejeezus out of basically everyone. 

Luckily, those people are making things up. You’re more likely to die because you shook a vending machine and it fell on top of you than you are to get bitten (note: not attacked) by a white shark. There’s a couple things you’re got to know about how sharks function to understand why worrying about getting nommed on by one at the beach is pretty silly. 

To start, they’re not man-eaters. Sharks don’t even know what a human is. We’re not aquatic organisms and they’ve probably only rarely encountered humans before, so there’s no reason to assume they’re going to be like ‘omg tasty hooman’ and charge over for a snack We don’t fit into what sharks consider prey, so they’re not going to prey on us intentionally. 

However, they do prey on seals. Tasty, blubbery, freaking-stupidly-clever-and-fast seals. And a human on a surfboard (which is when almost all shark encounters happen that result in injury) happens to look mightily like a seal if all you can see is a silhouette. More importantly, it’s a slow, stationary seal, which implies an easy meal. Most of the time, sharks ‘attack’ surfers thinking they’re seals. And guess what? Humans do not have all that tasty, energy-loaded blubber that seals do. We’re pretty bony and we’re on these weird plastic things that have got to taste nasty as hell. Most shark ‘attacks’ last for one bite, because the shark pretty quickly realizes that we’re not the pinniped it thought we were, and those bones aren’t worth the effort, and it leaves. Not great for the surfer who is now missing lots of bits, but hey, the shark isn’t purposefully being an asshole. It was a case of mistaken identity!

But there are lots of encounters where people don’t get hurt, right? They just get the shit scared out of them when a shark starts face-punching their arm, and panic, and call the media, and suddenly it’s an attack again. This is actually because most of a shark’s sensory organs are on it’s face. 

All those red dots are organs called the ampullae of lorenzini, and they sense electrical stimulus. They’re the organs that all cartilaginous fish use to locate food - when you see a ray sweeping it’s rostrum across the sand, it’s using it’s ampullae to search for buried critters. So if a shark is curious about something, say, a human, the first response is to nose it to get more information. That’s not aggression, it’s curiosity. Then, unfortunately, if it still wants more information, it’ll go and take a nibble - because, if you look above, there are more dots right around the mouth than anywhere else. Sharks are basically the really sharp aquatic equivalent of that annoying baby who has to put everything in it’s mouth. 

Because humanity is collectively terrified of anything that has more naturally provided pointy bits than we do, everything has to demonize sharks, and that ends really badly. Everything gets interpreted as aggression. This, for instance, is a video in which a shark attempts to figure out what a pontoon boat is and gets stuck in the float. The people watching it of course put JAWS music on and captioned it as an attack, but that’s just a stressed shark going ‘wtf is this weird thing and why won’t it give me my teeth back’. 

It’s shark season, but that doesn’t mean they’re out to eat us. We’re a bony, problematic food that likes to play mean tricks by pretending to be seals. If you don’t want to get attacked by a shark? Be careful about being in the water, and don’t surf at sunset or sunrise. If you see a shark being inquisitive, just bop it. They’re not used to any sort of physical contact from something that isn’t either food, a predator, or a mate, so they’ll generally just leave immediately.

Tl;dr, sharks are mouthy babies who aren’t good at differentiating humans from seals, and we certainly don’t help them any.

Shark Attack ( i )

Chapter 1: Dawn Patrol

one | two | three | four | five | six 

Group: BTS

Pairing: V X READER


Excerpt: ‘you glared at the shark circling your board, “Tae, we are not reenacting Jaws!

Genre: fluff, angst, surfer au , shifter au

Length: 1k

A/N: i went from being super proud of this to really insecure about it, but tomorrow pt 2 will come out and the other parts will be posted daily ~


The clear water lapped over the front of your board, as you continued to paddle out on the empty sea with only the orange sky and sun breaking the horizon as companions. You had left Taehyung asleep and most likely hungover in the van from last night’s party and as much as you loved to be with him, memories of his infectious laugh before he would snake you causing you to either bailout or fight him for the wave, where a few reasons why you sometimes preferred  some much needed alone time.

When it was just you and the waves, the foam of ankle snappers coating your board, you felt a sense of peace and belonging, it was too early for anyone else to be surfing so as you saw a set, and you knew you wouldn’t have to worry about your partner, meaning you could surf with no worries or duties.

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Shark Attack ( iii )

Chapter 3: Neptune’s Cocktail

 one | two | three | four | five | six 

Group: BTS

Pairing: V X READER


Summary: Your thoughts of Taehyung distract you from your surfing, and you both begin to wonder if your relationship is still purely best friends.

Genre: fluff, angst, surfer au, shifter au

Length: 1.6k

A/N: half way through! i hope you’re still enjoying this fic and thank you for all the amazing support that gives me the confidence to keep posting these and the motivation to write! any messages are always appreciated <3

These afternoons were when the beach proved why it was your favourite, watching the tall waves with their white crests as they would crash into the shore, bright surfboards littered the water but you were still excited for today.

Your hair was still damp as you sat in between Taehyung’s long legs, his fingers deftly plaiting your hair as you started pulling on your wetsuit with great difficulty as he kept tugging on your hair to make you stay still.

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Shark Attack ( vi )

Chapter 6: Love

one | two | three | four | five | six 

Group: BTS

Pairing: V X READER


Summary: A late night surf, a punch to the face and a confession of feelings.

Genre: fluff, angst, surfer au , shifter au

Length: 0.9k


You are all stars and this would not have been a reality without all of you! 

this was meant to be extra long but i liked this as a finale soo. there is a chance of one more bonus chapter but pls dont request it cus i will be very busy w my surprises

Originally posted by thebangtanway

“Hurry up Guk, he won’t get annoyed if he doesn't find out,” you pulled your hair over your shoulder, turning your back to him so he could zip up your wetsuit as you both continued to argue in hushed voices. You were arguing because he was being clucked about late night surfing, especially without Taehyung’s knowing where you were both going, but it was the perfect, clear night and your boyfriend was fast asleep on the bed and you were not giving up this opportunity.

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