shampoo is better

if a man smells good he’s appropriating it from butch lesbians. we wear ur cologne/deodorant/shampoo scents better so jot that down. 

EXO’s Reaction to: Being Dads

Xiumin: is so gentle and calm. never once yelled at his child. he’s prob the only parent in the world that loves play time. him and his kid run a pretend café and serve coffee to all the thirsty teddy bear customers

Luhan: “daddy’s manly, isn’t he?” imo he’s more old fashioned in his beliefs so he would teach his son about being a manly gentleman, signing him up for the schools soccer team and his daughter would wear lots of dresses and be absolutely spoiled

Kris: his hands are even bigger than the baby so he struggles with holding her/him. once he gets the hang of it, he’s a pro dad. when he picks the kid up from school, the other moms stare at him in awe and the dads in jealously because he’s gorgeous the child is gorgeous and they’re gorgeous together

Originally posted by holymotherlandkorea

Suho: super protective dad. like makes the kid wear three jackets even during summer in case they catch a cold and watches them like a hawk, panicking if they even scrape their knee. also so many dad jokes

Originally posted by yixingofficial

Lay: forgets to pick the child up from school, forgets their birthday, forgets every promise he makes to take them to the zoo. but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t absolutely adore him/her. he always notices if they’re acting differently so he’ll sit them down and listen to them, even if they’re just upset over loosing a crayon. his child feels very loved and secure with him (a/n: if you’ve never seen yixing make brodie dance to cmb then you’ve never lived  👉 here 👈 you’re welcome)

Baekhyun: tries to persuade the baby into their first words being something stupid like “kkaebsong” or “ugly d.o.” he’s hella proud when his kid tells him they have a crush on Chanyeol and he tries to plan a wedding to officially make yeollie family

Originally posted by exoturnback

Chen: wakes up from a nap with marker all over his face and curses that his child inherited his personality, not their mothers

Originally posted by exoxoolf

Chanyeol: is a giant baby himself so has lots of fun playing but isn’t v good at the serious aspects of parenting like discipline. his kid gets away with everything around him because he doesn’t have the heart to give time outs

Originally posted by theflyinggummybear

D.O: his child might turn out a little chubby since he loves to cook and if his son/daughter looks at him with big owl eyes inherited from him, he just can’t say no. even if they’re asking for brownies at 11am. doesn’t treat his child like an actual child though, more like a tiny adult. he doesn’t use baby talk and his kid is the only kid in school that could have a serious conversation about a dishs recipe or politics. kyungsoo encourages them to hit uncle Chanyeol as much as they want

Originally posted by osehu

Tao: loves bath time cause we all know he doesn’t shower alone so now he has a bathing buddy. the rubber ducks and nice smelling “no tears” shampoo make it even better. his child is also always v fashionable and for a girl, he’ll spoil her with cute jewelry and princess outfits - “so you can dress like the princess you are”

Kai: from the moment s/he could walk, they were in all different types of dance classes; hip hop, ballet, traditional Korean dance, ballroom, etc. his child is a dance prodigy

Originally posted by iamalatingirlbitch

Sehun: is v proud that the kid looks like a mini him. also loves the fact that his child looks up to him so he plans matching outfits and takes them on father-daughter/son bonding dates to get bubble tea and bitch about all their “pabo uncles.” prob buys them exo merch of him, like bracelets with his name or socks with cartoon him

youtube

Fire Burns Oil


I hope your fire, fire burns baby
I hope you lay down in your sleep and you choke on every lie you told
And when you’re reaching out for me you’ll see you reap everything you sow


Ingredients:

  • Cayenne
  • (3) Habañeros (dried)
  • Red pepper flakes
  • Turmeric
  • Sulphur
  • 3 matchsticks (wood)
  • Oil: 4 carrier : 1 castor

Instructions

  1. Place oil in a pan with red pepper flakes, turmeric and cayenne. Put on low heat and allow to infuse for an hour. Remove from heat and allow to cool until it will no longer scald your delicate digits. 
  2. In a bottle or jar of your choosing, add sulphur and dried habañeros. Strike each match, allowing it to burn half way, shake it out and drop the stem into the jar/bottle. Strain it the cooled oil (optional), and carefully pour it into your container.
  3. Handle with care (or gloves, if you don’t want to burn your eyes right out of their sockets).
  4. Wrap it with a red/orange cloth and store in a dark location near your stove or hearth.

Perfect for works of punishment, revenge, “hot curses” and can even be left as an offering to infernal spirits, especially if mixed with tobacco or an alcohol of their choice. And – you didn’t hear it from me – but you could also put it in someone’s shampoo or… even better… lube to put a little pep in their step. And burn…. Pep and burn. Not that I would ever condone such an act… For legal reasons. 

Blackmail [Nathan Prescott/Reader] (3/?)

Title:Blackmail

Editor: Check her out

Rating: Slightly sexual, M for Mature

Pairing:Nathan Prescott/Female!Reader (2nd Person, You/Your, Characteristic identified: )

Summary: (Beginning) It all started with your drug book. After your lessons, you two quickly went back to Blackwell to go and have a movie at the dorms date.

Word Count:1,565

Warnings: Sexual interpreted scenes

Note: No note.

Keep reading

When Mingyu is your neighbor

Originally posted by the8ght

  • you’ve lived next to this kid since middle school
  • both of your rooms are on the second floor, and one of your window faces one of his.
  • a lot of shouting in between you guys (via the windows)
  • and it’s usually about homework, or complaining that the other is being too loud
  • once it hits high school, puberty decides to smack mingyu in the face (and body)
  • which means that sometimes in the morning, you’d accidentally glance over and see his toned, shirt-free body
  • of course you were like wtf because you could have sworn that last week mingyu was 4 ft tall with braces
  • but nope, now he’s basically a giant with muscles e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e
  • best worst of all, he never closes his curtains, so you’d see him whether you like it or not
  • and when you would close your curtains, he’d throw pencils at your window and ask why you have your curtains closed because isn’t it too dark
  • and you’d lie and say it’s because he’s being too loud, but in reality you were distracted by his hotness that you can’t do your math hw
  • he obviously doesn’t buy it and instead HOPS over to your room through the windows because he’s tall now and it’s possible
  • basically invites himself into your room to do hw with you everyday
  • he would also just join you for dinner because your mom loves mingyu
  • ends up spending the night in your room and borrows your blankets to sleep on your carpet
  • the next morning you’d wake up to see your room empty, but then you go into your bathroom and BAM he’s there brushing his teeth with just a towel around his waist
  • and he’s like “oh yeah I borrowed your shower”
  • but you’re like “mingyu your own room is LITERALLY 10 feet away”
  • but he’s like “but your shampoo smells better”
  • and that somehow became a routine and he would just randomly use your shower
  • and to even things out, you’d hop over to his room and use his shower
  • and so you two often end up smelling like each other
  • it was all fun and games until one day, you forgot to bring an extra shirt to his shower, and ended up wearing one of his shirts from his closet
  • and when mingyu saw you he suddenly went quiet for some reason
  • like his usual personality disappeared and he’s all fidgety
  • you tried ignoring it and went on to do homework, but you could sense him staring at you a lot more than usual
  • you were about to ask him what’s wrong, but then he suddenly tells you how good you look in his shirt
  • and his face was all red and smiley
  • which also made you turn red
  • and then he tells you that if you want to, you can wear his shirts any time
2

Being friends with Harry would include:

-       Thumb wars

-       Plaiting each others hair

-       Stealing his expensive shirts to sleep in

-       Spontaneously singing his solos to piss him off

-       Him joining in

-       Finding him napping in your bed when you get home

-       Shopping for dresses

-       Pillow fights

-       Making stupid videos on your phone

-       Him coming over with cupcakes when its your time of the month

-       Him buying you a car so you don’t have to catch the bus anymore

-       Sending suggestive emojis

-       Him getting protective of you when you go out drinking

-       Getting him hooked on Gossip Girl

-       Cuddling when a boy upsets you

-       Him always telling you to wear ‘that black bra’ because it looks amazing

-       Him not letting you out of bed in the morning after a sleepover because he wants to stay warm

-       Him writing down weird things you say to use as song lyrics

-       Him using your shampoo because it smells better than his

-       And it smells like you


not my gif

The Hot Mess Parents

Just a quick warning of how much utter shit you are about to read here. You should honestly not read this fic unless you’re high, drunk, both or you really really love this ship to bypass the utter nonsense my high mind wrote while I was on vacation.

I warned you.

“We have to be there for 7, although I’m sure that time is negotiable for us because of our careers,” she said as she scrubbed her chocolate locks with her usual shampoo.

“Better to be there for 7,” Owen replied as he stood under the running water while she scrubbed. He didn’t exactly know where they were supposed to be for 7 tonight, but he wasn’t about to disclose that information after forgetting 3 times to get the groceries in the last three weeks and forgetting to pick up Ryan 7 times this month. He was almost sure she’d choke him in the shower if she found out he had no clue what she was talking about.

“Yeah, but the later we get there,” she said, switching places with him in the shower so that she was under the water now, “the less time I have to spend socialising with Patricia and all the other people I hate in that stupid preschool.”

“Her name isn’t Patricia,” he laughed, lustily watching as foam slowly slid down her water glossed body, “And it’s a great school. He only has two more years there anyway, so I’m sure you can put aside your hatred for the betterment of your son.” He was about to grip her waist and pull her in for a kiss when he was suddenly pulled back under the water as she switched their positions once again in the shower.

“I don’t care what her name is,” Amelia grumbled, squeezing a handful of liquid soap in her hand, her hair still foamy from the half-assed rinse she gave it. She turned around and rubbed the soap all over her body and he dutifully helped get the parts on her back that she couldn’t reach as easily, like he always did. As she complained about the other moms, she bent over to scrub her legs, causing her ass to press into his crotch. Owen looked up at the ceiling and closed his eyes. Easy there, he thought to his member, ignore the ass in front of you, ignore it. Meanwhile, Amelia continued as if she had no idea what she was doing to him.

“And I feel like mothers of 3 year old children shouldn’t be so sour and evil,” she finished, standing up and turning around, “you know what I mean?” He watched as her hands made their way to her boobs and lathered them. It’s just boobs, he thought to his lower region, you’ve seen them before. Relax.

“Owen!” she whined, waving her hand in front of his face, “Are you even listening to me?”

His blue irises stared blankly at her and nodded, “Of course I am.” Amelia looked down at his crotch and rolled her eyes, moving him out of the way so she could rinse off again.

“You haven’t even washed your hair as yet,” she complained as she grabbed his shampoo and squirted some into her palm, “We don’t have time for sex right now.”

“Because you’re too busy trying to impress people you hate?” Owen finished, watching the way her breasts jiggled as she combed her fingers through his strawberry blonde locks.

“I’m not trying to impress them,” she said, moving him under the water to rinse his hair, “I’m just trying to avoid giving them reasons to make fun of me.” He took over rinsing his hair while she reached for his Irish spring body wash.

“No one is going to make fun of you,” Owen assured her.

“You saw how they were last time,” she reminded him as she guided him away from the water before squeezing a wad of liquid soap onto his chest.

“There’s no need to use so much soap,” he reminded her for the 500th time, “And all they do is look. Not one of them has the balls to actually do something harmful to you or me.”

She sighed dejectedly and spread the soap all over his chest, “Maybe you’re right.”

“I know I’m right,” he told her, washing his arms, “Nothing is gonna happen tonight, especially with me beside you, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Can we have sex now that we’ve gotten that issue out of the way?” he asked with his eyebrows raised. His angry demeanour was slowly crumbling as her smile got wider and it disappeared completely when he saw her dimples appear.

She nodded at him.

He scooped her up into his arms and carried her under the showerhead.

“Is my dress too short?” Amelia asked Owen as they ventured into the small auditorium, parents roaming all over. She was wearing a matte black dress that was backless. Owen wore a simple suit with a black tie.

“Too long,” he teased, sneaking a quick squeeze of her rear. She quickly slapped his hand away as a group of mothers approached them.

“Amelia,” the mother in the middle of the group greeted her. She held a plate of goodies in her hand.

“Patricia,” Amelia replied with a wide smile.

‘Patricia’ rolled her eyes and offered them the plate in her hand, “Brownies?”

“Depends on if you made them,” she retorted.

“We’d love to have some,” Owen quickly intercepted, grabbing two brownies off the plate, “Thank you, ma’am.”

“Oh, Dr. Hunt,” ‘Patricia flirted, patting Owen’s shoulder, “When are you going to stop calling me that and start calling me by my real name?” Amelia rolled her eyes. Trolls don’t deserve real names, she thought.

“As soon as my girlfr…wife stops calling you Patricia,” he replied, guiding Amelia away from them.

“I wonder how long we can continue to pretend to be married,” Amelia pondered, taking a brownie from Owen and stuffing the whole thing into her mouth.

“We can get married for real, if you want,” Owen half joked, putting the other brownie in his mouth.

“Very funny, Owen,” she said, breaking away from him to greet the principal.

Hour 1: 9:00PM

“Amelia,” Owen said in a terrified voice, grabbing her shoulder and turning her away from the snacks table and towards him. With hooded, bloodshot eyes, he looked at the half-eaten brownie in her hand, possibly the fifth one she was having for the night, and panicked. “Stop eating those!” he berated her, slapping the brownie out of her hand. She watched as the brownie hit the floor and discarded into a million pieces.

“Why the fuck did you do that for?” she almost yelled, grabbing the attention of some of the parents nearby.

“Come with me,” he said, taking her hand and leading them outside the auditorium. Once outside, he said, “You were right. You were absolutely right to not trust those mothers.”

“I’m always right,” she proudly replied, folding her arm across her chest, “But remind me again why I’m right?”

“Do you know how much trouble we can get in if the hospital has a random test tomorrow,” Owen continued as if he hadn’t heard her question, “Or next week. Or next month!”

“Test? What test?” she queried. It was only then that she noticed his droopy, red eyes. “Are you high?” Amelia exclaimed, moving closer to him to grab his face and get a better look, “Oh my god, you are high. You have got to be kidding me, Owen.”

“How are you not high?!” he asked in a high pitched voice, “I had four brownies and I’m twice your size.”

“The brownies? They have marijuana in them?”

“Maybe because you’re a drug addict, perhaps that’s why you’re not high as yet,” he mused, ignoring her question.

“The brownies have weed in them,” Amelia reiterated, breaking away from him to pace the corridor, “They’re pot brownies and I’m a drug addict. Holy crap.” She looked at him, muttering, “Owen, I broke my sobriety.”

“I don’t think it counts if you’re unknowingly drugged,” he pointed out, watching as she had a silent meltdown, “I mean, it’s too late now, so might as well enjoy it, right?”

“Wait, how are we going to get home?” she asked, pressing her hands to either sides of her face. Owen shrugged.

Hour 2: 10:00PM

“Ryan is a wonderful, brilliant and charming boy,” Ryan’s teacher commented to Owen and Amelia as the two parents stood by the punch bowl. A few minutes ago, the bowl had been filled to the brim but because of one of the lesser positive side effects of being high, cotton mouth, the bowl was now half full because of them.

“Hello?” the teacher called out to them, catching both of their attention now.

“Uh, right,” Amelia said, not recalling any of what the teacher said, “You’re welcome.”

“Okay then…” she replied, giving the two a weird look before walking away. The second she left, Owen and Amelia burst into uncontrollable laughter.

“Why are you laughing?” Owen asked in between breathy giggles.

“I don’t know,” she responded, gasping for breath, “Why are you laughing?”

“Dr. Shepherd, Dr. Hunt,” the principal greeted them with a warm smile and a chuckle, “What are we laughing about here?” The two put an abrupt stop to their laughter and straightened up as if they were about to be penalised for their actions.

“Nothing,” Owen said, wiping a stray tear from his eye.

“I wanted to talk to you about your son,” he said, quickly disregarding their funny behaviour, “I was thinking about skipping him to the final year of preschool. Well, thinking is the wrong word, because that’s what I want to do.”

“You want to skip him to the final year?” Amelia confirmed, to which the principal nodded. She looked at Owen, who smiled proudly back at her. Tears brimmed in her eyes as she murmured, “I only have to endure these bitches for one more year?”

“Well, I wouldn’t put it like that,” he sheepishly replied, “But-“

Amelia embraced him in a sudden hug, whispering, “Thank you.” The principal looked questioningly at Owen.

“She’s just very emotional,” Owen justified, patting Amelia’s shoulder and coaxing her to let go of the guy, “Come on, honey, let’s go.”

Hour 3: 11:00PM

“This is illegal and we are going to die. You’re on the wrong side of the road,” Amelia reminded him for the fifth time.

“Have you ever noticed how weird the road looks at night?” Owen mused, returning to the right side of the road as he drove at 30km/h, just to be safe, “Like, it’s so dark but the headlights illuminate the way.” They had no other choice but to drive home, too paranoid to leave Amelia’s car at the school and in the possession of the same mothers whom had drugged them three hours ago.

Amelia squinted at the road, “You’re absolutely right. Pull over there.”

“Why?” he asked, pulling up outside a house that they were unfamiliar with. There appeared to be some sort of college party happening. There were drunk students all over the front lawn, there was toilet paper hung all over the outside of the house and strobe lights flickered all over while loud music played.

“Because we’re going to party,” she said, opening the passenger door. Unable to stop her, Owen came out of the car also and followed her.

“Don’t you think we should go to the hospital or something?” Owen suggested, “Somewhere that won’t tempt you to drink?”

“You get so paranoid when you’re high,” she complained, taking his hand, “I’m not going to drink.”

“Can I drink?” Owen asked. Amelia looked at him and flashed one of her mischievous grins.

Hour 4: 12:00AM

“Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink!” the crowd yelled as Owen downed his last cup of beer and won the competition. He raised his balled fist into the air like a gladiator and howled, making the crowd of college students go wild. Losing his clothes a half hour ago in a weird game, Owen had a stuffed hornet tied around his crotch area, keeping him somewhat clothed. There was a large drawing of a penis ejaculating on his chest, which he couldn’t recall how it got there, and his hair was in every direction. Amelia was in the kitchen, dancing on top of the island in a bikini that he was absolutely sure wasn’t hers.

“Where did you find that bikini?” Owen asked, looking up at her. He held his hand out for her, helping her off the table.

“I can’t remember,” she yelled in his ear, grasping his hand and leading him outside, “Where did you get that hornets stuffed toy from?” Owen shrugged his shoulders.

He couldn’t remember how they got there, but they were now in the pool. Red cups were floating by them but they were too deep in conversation about a case to notice. Amelia had her legs wrapped around his torso and his hornet had been traded in for a speedo that he also couldn’t remember how he got.

“Using all three methods allowed me to come at the tumour at all angles, and also monitor the other unaffected parts of the brain too,” she finished, “You know what I mean?”

“Nope,” Owen truthfully answered.

“I’ll start over then.”

“Please don’t. You think so fast that you make my eyes spin,” he said, “especially when you’re high. Starting over isn’t going to help. I’m a trauma surgeon. I don’t pay attention to detail.” He slipped his fingers into her bikini and, with a playful grin, murmured, “I get in…and I get out.”

“So this was your plan all along,” she laughed, feeling his fingers teasing her within the tiny fabric.

“Not exactly,” he replied, “But I hear that the sex is ten times better when you’re high.”

“Where did you hear that from?”

“A medical journal, actually.”

Hour 5: 1:00AM

She was on top of him and he was sitting up as they fucked in someone’s bedroom. They were absolutely sure that they hadn’t left the house, because they could still hear Rick Astley playing outside.

“Owen,” Amelia whispered in his ear.

“Owen,” he replied back, unsure of why he did so, although it weirdly turned him on.

“Say something dirty.”

“A pig in mud,” he breathlessly replied.

“A pig in mud?”

“Uh, I mean you feel so good,” Owen moaned as his hands squeezed her ass, “like mac and cheese.”

“Say something else,” she prodded, hoping he’d come better than that.

“HER2-positive breast cancer has an advantage within the typically resilient brain environment,” he quoted, thinking that something neurosurgical would definitely turn her on. It seemed like a good idea at the time, at least.

“Growl at me,” she demanded, ignoring his previous, weird comment, “Fuck me like you paid for it.”

Complying, he growled in her ear like a rabid dog and said, “I want to live in your vagina and pay rent and do the dishes. And I’m gonna pee inside of you.”

“Don’t do that,” she quickly told him.

“Okay,” he said. He remained silent for a few moments before moaning, “I want to get you pregnant.”

“Please don’t do that either,” she laughed, “You’re not very good at talking dirty.”

“Okay,” he nodded. He took one of her nipples into his mouth to shut himself up. The feeling of her fingers pulling at his hair was a hundred times more enhanced for him, making him feel like he could come undone just from her doing that.

“I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling,” Owen sang mindlessly, burying his face in her chest, his breathing becoming heavier as he neared his peak, “Gotta make you understand. Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you. Never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.” His voice progressively got louder as he moved into the chorus and climaxed.

Hour 6: 2:00AM

“What kind of party ends at 2 in the morning?” Owen grumpily asked as they scoured the floor for their belongings.

“I don’t think it ended. I think mostly everyone just died,” Amelia responded, “There’re still people outside.” She pushed a stray student to the side, finding her car keys and cell phone beneath him. “Found it!” she celebrated, holding the car keys up in the air along with her phone.

“I found my shirt and stuff, but someone is wearing my pants,” he announced, pointing at the man passed out in the corner of the living room.

“Well hurry up and take it off of him,” she huffed, looking for her clothes now, “We have a shift starting in six hours.”

“I don’t think we’ll be sober in six hours,” Owen said, flipping the lifeless boy over and unzipping the pants, “We ate a whole plate of weed brownies. Not to mention the fact that we’re old people and our metabolisms are slower than when we were their age.”

“Stop making me depressed about being old,” she huffed, retiring her search efforts for her dress; she’d have to find something else to wear, “And I call dibs on driving.”

The next morning

Owen and Amelia sat down in silence at the kitchen table. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of their spoons scooping in their cereal bowls. Amelia was in a kangaroo onesie, and she wasn’t exactly sure how she got it, Owen was in a pants that definitely did not belong to him, although last night he thought it did, and Amelia’s car rear-ended Owen’s truck outside in her driveway. It was a mere miracle that they were both alive and well.

Striking up the courage to speak amidst the awkward silence, Owen asked, “Do you remember anything after we found my pants?”

“Nope,” she answered curtly, hurriedly stuffing her face with a spoonful of cheerios.

More silence. More clinking of spoons against glass bowls.

“Are we gonna talk about you wanting to pee inside-“

“That is never to be spoken of ever,” he quickly cut her off, “Neither is ‘a pig in mud’ or me wanting to get you pregnant or that thing I said about breast cancer and brain cancer. Nothing. I was high, forget about it.”

“Okaaay,” Amelia said, biting the inside of her cheek to fight off a smile.

Owen looked up at her, his cheeks red with embarrassment, “Don’t you have an NA meeting to go to or something?”

She got up and disposed of her bowl of milk before walking past Owen and whispering in his ear, “I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling. Gotta make you understand.”

His cheeks became redder than before, “You’re never gonna let this go, are you?”

“No I am not, Rick Astley,” she teased, planting a quick kiss on his forehead before heading to the bathroom, all the while singing the chorus of the song, just to add insult to injury.

Moving into your first apartment with Stiles would include
  •  Him dropping the box that had the plates and cups in it causing all of them to shatter
  • Arguing over what body wash to get
  • Him using all of your shampoo because it smells better than his
  • Sitting on the floor together watching tv in the living room because you don’t have a couch yet
  • Him cooking dinner
  • Him burning said dinner
  • Him stealing the covers
  • You hogging the bed
  • Bickering over who has to clean the bathroom
  • Showers together
  • Sex literally everywhere
  • Even in the kitchen
  • Decorating for the holidays
  • Him telling you it’s too early for Christmas lights (you pouting until he helps hand them up)
  • Trying to repaint the bedroom and end up in a major paint war
  •  cooking holiday dinners together
  • him dropping the turkey on the floor
  • slow dancing in the kitchen (badly)
  • “(Y/N”) where is my …”
Before and During


Fandom/Pairing: 
The Losers - Carlos “Cougar” Alvarez/Jake Jensen

Prompt: Wayofthewarrior (a.k.a my beta) when she threw out a comment about Cougar measuring his time in “Before Jensen” and “During Jensen,” in the middle of a document she was beta reading. I took it and ran.

Words: ~ 7 000

Rating/Warnings: G / Mentions of other people being homophobes

Notes: While the initial prompt (unintentional as it might have been) was enough to get me started, I chose to take the opportunity to explore what it would be like if Cougar was straight, but still finds himself attracted to and in love with Jensen. I’ve always wanted to do that. This is in no way homophobic, but maybe a tad bit uninformed and confused. Hopefully no one will take offence. I just tried to write what it had to be like for someone who has always considered themselves as straight, to suddenly find that they might not be. Enjoy. Can now be found on AO3 as well.


Cougar was well aware that there were several different ways with which you could measure time, and it differed from person to person which tools you used.

Clay was a soldier through and through, going by military time even when on leave, and often remembered events based on between or during which missions they had taken place. He went month by month, rather than weeks or days.

Roque was similar, but with the slight difference that he preferred to measure it as time spent on and off missions, in two separate categories, with clear annual breaks for easier filing. Roque was structured in his grip of time, and had a startlingly good memory.

Pooch was often counting down to things: the next call he could make to Jolene, the next time he could hear Jolene’s voice, and the next time he would get to see Jolene. But he was also more prone to count days rather than weeks or months, despite how high numbers that could occasionally accumulate.

Jensen counted time in regards to Beth’s age, sometimes seemingly forgetting that there had been a time before it. Jensen was also fond of minutes and seconds — precision to the point of impracticality — because to him, everything that moved slower was less interesting. Useful and noteworthy, yes, but with his attention-span and hobbies a second was all it took for things to go from intriguing to boring.

Cougar divided his time into Before Jensen and During Jensen. It had taken him a while to even realize it, but that was his way of measuring the passing of time. It was aided by days, weeks, months, and years, but in all honestly — those two were the only ones that really mattered.

He was naturally aware that there might also — sometime in the future — come an After Jensen, but Cougar prayed that it would be as brief as possible, if it occurred at all.

Most of the time he refused to even think about it.

Keep reading

acrobat-elle  asked:

Yay kiss prompts! I would love to see either 13 or 19. <3

kiss to shut someone up


He’s fed up. Done. Frustrated and in need of just one bloody moment where everything isn’t centered around solving a crisis or saving the damn town. Internally he curses his thoughts, knowing he chose this life by Emma’s side and everything that comes along with that partnership. But, for the love of the Gods, no one can be expected to go on in this constant state of chaos. 

Emma’s hand is woven tight with his as they walk towards Granny’s but her focus is on Snow as they work out the plan of gathering the Dwarves and some of the Lost Boys to help in the search. He’s only half listening, trusting the two women to know what’s best. His mind is too clouded with annoyance to be of much help at the moment anyway. He just needs…no wants…no, it’s definitely a need, he needs a damn second alone with Emma.

They’re almost at the door when he tightens his hand around hers and begins to change course to the side of the building.

“Killian, what are you…Mom, I’ll be right in…Killian!”

She’s scrambling to keep up as his pace quickens, blind determination fully eclipsing all rational thought. He loosens his grip on her hand in fear that he may be hurting her and is thankful that she doesn’t let go.

“Are you okay? What’s gotten into…”

Keep reading

This Means War

Summery: can’t have a nice shower without your best smelling shampoo, where did it go? Only a certain Winchester knows

Sam x Reader

Warnings: none

Word count: n/a

A/N: requested by this cutie:
queenk023

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All you wanted to do was have a nice shower, get all the dirt and grime out of your hair and relax all the tense muscles that had been slowly stiffening since the vampire hunt you and the boys went on.

A simple shower, thats all you asked for. You had just bough this amazing smelling shampoo and couldn’t wait to use it.

And stepping into the shower you realized you wouldn’t be using… Not until you found it.

Where your shampoo bottle had gotten to was a complete mystery, and although Dean was notorious for taking your things, you had a sneaking suspicion that it wasn’t the eldest Winchester who had taken to stealing your shampoo bottle.

So, wrapping your blue bathrobe around yourself you made you way to Sammy’s room.

“Hey Sam?” You questioned as you walked into his room without so much as a knock.

“Yeah?” He said looking up from his bed where he had been sitting, journals scattered all around him.

“Where’s my shampoo…” You asked as you took a seat next to him.

You breathed in and felt the smell of flowers wash over you. You grinned wildly as the Winchester blushed.

“Oh, umm about that- well you see-” he stuttered as he looked anywhere but at you.

“You used my shampoo.” You stated simply, grinning from ear to ear.

“I had to! Dean replaced mine with hair remover!”

You chuckled lightly
“Well your hair does look softer… And shinier you should use my shampoo more often”

“You know I don’t think my hair has ever smelt this good” he admitted with a small smile.

“You know what this means, right?”

“That women’s shampoo smells better?” He questioned with his eyebrows drawn together in confusion.

“No you doorknob! We need to get Dean back!”

Sam looked at you and smiled.
“We?” He questioned.

“This means war.” You said as you pecked a surprise kiss on the Winchesters lips.

2

I’ve been asked a few times how I managed to keep my hair so vibrant and somewhat healthy when I was going through my brights phase last year. I’m also including a few tips and tricks!

Disclaimer. I am not a beauty blogger. I try things and if I like them, I recommend them.

The following is not professional advice. I’m a senior in my cosmetology program and I graduate at the end of the summer. I have collected this knowledge from trial and error, research, and advice from classmates and instructors.

  1. I shampooed my hair once or twice a week. I know, it sounds a little gross, but keep reading!! You really shouldn’t be shampooing your hair everyday if you can help if, especially if you color. Your hair wants those oils when it’s a little dry! Nom nom nom. 
  2. Sulfate-free shampoo. I like Pureology. It’s a little on the pricy side, but it’s super concentrated so I can make it last a very long time.
  3. Dry shampoo for those greasy days. I love Dove. It’s cheap, it doesn’t mess with my color, and it smells good. At the end of the day, a shampoo substitute should smell nice! 
  4. Shampoo capping!!! Put on gloves, mix some color with your shampoo, and lather up! I have heard of folks using conditioner for this method, but the shampoo will do a better job of this. The conditioner is just coating your hair. The color will slide off. 
  5. Try a lot of different brands for your fabulous, funky colors! Not every brand has the answer to every color. I like Manic Panic for my blues and pinks and Pravana for my purples and greens. :) (I am in the process of working on a rainbow project on a model so I will share my findings from that.)
  6. Condition condition condition! The process of lightening your hair can be rough. I love my Amika Obliphica Nourishing Mask. Remember, the damage done from bleaching doesn’t always show up the day you do it! i can take weeks, months. Don’t pinch pennies when it comes to maintaining your new, fabulous locks.
  7. Did you manage to turn your bathroom into a color war zone? Does it look like a clown threw up? White vinegar has helped me clean up color stains that have been sitting for weeks! 
  8. Buy a black pillowcase. You’ll thank me. 

Any other questions? Send me an ask! I’ll try my best to help you out. :) 

Protein treatments are very important and will help resolve your issues of dry, brittle hair and breakage. Personally, I used this treatment because my hair has been breaking off a lot especially when co-washing it. Protein is important because it repairs your hair and will help it become stronger and gain more elasticity, which results in less breakage!

Ingredients:

  • 2 Eggs-GREAT source of protein
  • Mayonnaise- Protein, as well as adding shine to your hair.
  • Coconut oil & Olive Oil-MOISTURE!
  • Honey-Moisture & Shine!
  • (optional)Peppermint oil or your favorite essential oil-This will help mask the smell of the Mayo.

**Peppermint oil helps stimulate hair growth!

I will most likely do this treatment once a month because I do it AFTER I wash my hair with shampoo! It’s a lot better to start off with clean, freshly washed hair! After washing your hair, let this sit in your hair for 45 mins and rinse it out! Follow that with your favorite conditioner! These next few steps are what I do personally, but after I apply the conditioner I pour cold Pure Aloe Vera Juice on my hair (adds shine and maintains the pH balance of your hair) and then seal in the moisture with your favorite oil(s)!

Hope this helps guys! Feel free to ask me any questions!

Shower Fail - Requested (Michael)

Anon said: Hey! Can you do an imagine where Y/N is dating one of the boys and she managed to get shampoo in her eyes and scream so her boyfriend help her but it’s like the first time he saw her in the shower and it end up super cute and fluffy? (Sorry for the english, it’s not my first language)

You stretch your body, feeling around in the big bed. You open your eyes and look around, seeing an empty room. “Morning baby”, Michael comes out of the bathroom. “There is breakfast if you want some”, as soon as he speaks the words, your belly grumbles. You sit up and see the room service cart.

“I didn’t hear that come”

“You were sound asleep, you had a night”

“I certainly did”, you smile to him. “Had a nice time tough”

“Yeah? Cause I was a bit scared to be honest”, he sits down on the bed next to you.

“Why?” you can see the insecurity come back to him.

“It was the first time you properly hung out with the lads and I, I was scared you wouldn’t like them”

“Why wouldn’t I like them?”

“They’re idiots”

“Well you’re an even bigger idiot and I like you so”, you shrug with a small smirk and he sticks his tongue out. “I had an amazing night Mikey and your friends are great”, you press your lips to his.

You and Michael had been dating for a couple of months before he left to go on tour again. Those months where all about him and you, in your own little world. But now you’re in his world and that for the first time. You arrived on tour with him yesterday and he took you straight out on night to the club. It was the first time you really spent time like that with the boys. You had a great night, they were funny and nice. Ashton brought Bryanna and you were the most nervous to meet her. You had a hard time thinking of yourself in Michael’s word, certainly with her being the other girlfriend. Obviously there is a huge difference noticeable when you compare you two, she is the model and you are the normal girl, but apart of that she was really sweet and you can see yourself getting friends with her. You had an amazing time with them all, you had some drinks, you danced and laughed the night away.

“So do you want something to eat? I ordered a bunch of stuff”

“I definitely want something, but first I’m going to hop in the shower. Wash all the grossness from last night off me”, you peck his cheek, get out of bed  and walk into the bathroom. You take off your clothes, turning on the water. You look around, not able to find your shampoo, so you wrap the huge towel round you and open the door again. “Mikey? Can I use your shampoo?”

“Sure babe”, he smiles to you. You close the door and take your place under the warm waterjet.  You take Michael’s shampoo, squeezing it to make some come out, but nothing comes out. So you shake it and squeeze it even harder. Finally some squirt out, right into your eye. You scream it out. The shampoo stings in your eye, you feel around in the shower not be able to see a thing. “Baby?” you hear Michael panicked voice storming in the bathroom.

“It hurts!” you almost cry. “I can’t see” he opens the shower. “What are you doing?” you crouch, enclosing your arms round your body.

“Helping you. You are clearly in pain. What happened?” he turns off the shower and you can feel his hand on your wet arm.

“Your fucking shampoo got in my eye”, you sound mad. “Don’t look Michael!”

“Come out of the shower”, he ignores you and you can feel his other hand pulling on your shoulder.

“Just give me a towel”, your voice sound hysterical, you know that he listened when you feel him wrap a towel round you. “Thank you”, you say softly. He helps you out of the shower, you hear him close the toilet lit and he pushes you down on it.

“Let me look”, he whispers. He cups your cheek and lifts your head up, gently getting all the remains of shampoo out of your eye. “Better?”

You open your eyes again, you can see and the pain is gone. “You’re my savior”, you press your lips to his. “But can you please get out now? I’m still fully naked under this towel”

“Baby, you do know I’ve seen you naked before”

“It’s different, that was in the dark”, he rolls his eyes. “Michael, this is terrible lighting, I was in pain, I was wet”

“Wet is never bad”, he smirks.

“It couldn’t be a sexy sight”

“Baby, listen to me you are always a sexy sight”

“Oh please”

“You are, trust me”, he gives you a little cheeky smile. “And by the way I didn’t even see that much. I was too worried and too focused on getting you out”

“Well maybe I should go back under the shower”, you smirk.

“Maybe you should”, he nods.

“And maybe you should come and help me, preventing I don’t get shampoo in my eye again”

“Maybe I should, just to be safe you know”

/Dana/