shaming sign

The Signs on a Saturday morning
  • Aries: Makes breakfast at like 2 am. No shame
  • Cancer: Does their homework or other work right away. (Seriously why?)
  • Taurus: Gets ready right away at 8 am. Then goes for a walk/run.
  • Gemini: Quite possible has a hangover from last night. No one knows for sure.
  • Leo: Gets all dressed up to go out. No one knows why however.
  • Virgo: Doesn't. Get. Up. Ever.
  • Libra: Sits in bed conjuring up a plan for the day and doesn't do much until 12 pm.
  • Scorpio: Hahahahahaha what is sleep though
  • Sagittarius: Gets up when the dog barks at a very unusual time. Quite possibly 5 am.
  • Capricorn: Is way too happy to be a morning person, step away.
  • Aquarius: Eats pizza rolls at 11:53 am
  • Pisces: Does something productive to put all of the other signs to shame.
Capricorn & Scorpio
  • Capricorn, spots Scorpio sitting under a tree on campus, jogs over to him: Hey, uh
  • Scorpio, looks up from his phone: What's up?
  • Capricorn, rubs the back of his neck: I'm pretty sure you know by now that I-
  • Scorpio, interrupts: need some weed?
  • Capricorn: What?
  • Scorpio, plays it off: Hm?

ooc:: if you can’t handle every single glorious Firth aesthetic that I will praise on this blog – you will learn to. But real talk look at this variety in looks. I’m PARTICULARLY reeling over dandy fop TM aesthetic ( third from right ) and professor AF aesthetic TM ( second from left )… oh and dandy laddy aesthetic TM in the middle.

The signs as kinks
  • Aries: gun
  • Taurus: quicksand
  • Gemini: symorophilia (arousal due to witnessing or staging car accidents)
  • Cancer: cake farting
  • Leo: yiffing
  • Virgo: vore
  • Libra: bees...?
  • Scorpio: guy fieri
  • Sagittarius: choking;))))
  • Capricorn: becoming inanimate objects
  • Aquarius: sacofricosis (cutting a hole in ur pocket so u can beat it in public)
  • Pisces: fish
the signs as shit my sister (a virgo) has actually said
  • aries: "These people should have like three statues of me by now, I've saved them so many times. I want statues!"
  • taurus: "I have tiny hands!"
  • gemini: "You have to pay attention or the lizard kills you."
  • cancer: "She's been making tea since the Great Depression, leave her alone."
  • leo: "DO NOT. FUCK. THE DARKSPAWN."
  • virgo: "Animal milk is for babies, nut milk is for grownups."
  • libra: "How deep is too deep?"
  • scorpio: "I don't really have /serious/ intrusive thoughts, because things like murder are things i think about deliberately."
  • sagittarius: "Obi-Wan can force penetrate meeeeeee!"
  • capricorn: "Having noodles without sauce is like having a dick without lube."
  • aquarius: "And then where would we be? Truly and utterly fucked...or not as fucked as we wanted to be."
  • pisces: "There's no looting in baseball!"
Overwatch: Cat-shaming signs
  • Soldier76: I snapped at Lucio once and I'm sorry.
  • Reaper: I waste too many guns and try too hard to be edgy
  • Mercy: I brought back two of my dead commanders and now one of them wants me dead.
  • Ana: I went away and left my two best friends and daughter until recently.
  • Hanzo: I tried to kill my brother and rode a cowboy too hard and broke the bed.
  • Genji: I twerked once and caused a riot.
  • D.Va: I stay up too late and drink too much Mtn. Dew.
  • Lucio: I stole from a company and I played my music too loud.
  • Reinhardt: Accidentally threw someone's back out when I hugged them.
  • Torbjorn: I turn any and everything into a turret that can be turned into one.
  • Zarya: I hate robots even the nice ones.
  • Mei: I froze my friends and forgot to unfreeze them
  • Zenyatta: Did nothing wrong.
  • Bastion: Shoots a lot though tries to be good.
  • Pharah: I have mommy issues.
  • Symmetra: Obsessed with Order and working a corrupted company.
  • McCree: Touched the samurai tiddy and got punched for it.
reblog this with your Venus sign and your least favourite colour

(this relates to the post I made a while back about Venus signs and favourite colours, and I’m curious to the answers)

e.g. Gemini Venus // baby pink