sgyu:1

For context, this is our party’s first campaign. An NPC has asked for our help getting into a mansion that was thought to be haunted, and all three of our party members have suspicions that the NPC is a ghost herself. 

Me (monk dwarf, Drybadd): Can I roll an arcana or religion check to see if I sense any ghostly energies about her?

DM: I mean, I guess? 

Me: *rolls 16 with modifiers*

DM: You see that she looks vaguely transparent around her ankles and feet, but it’s too dark to see much else. She seems human aside from that. 

Druid: Why the feet? 

Me: Drybadd has a foot fetish.

Context: Playing Broken Worlds, the Kill Six Billion Demons tabletop (not the post-apocalyptic one), our group saved my hometown from a big bad beastie and there’s a city-wide party. –our initiative rolls are 2d6+mod–

DM: Okay you got drunk and found our sleeping quarters, what do you do next?

Beggar: I seduce the mayor’s assistant because she caught my eye earlier.

*rolls 11+2 initiative*

Beggar: Awww yeah I’m gettin’ some!

DM: *hands me 2d6 again* Good initiative. Roll for the pussy.

Beggar:…what? But I just rol-

DM: Roll. For. Da p00sy.

Beggar: Uhh…

*nat 12*

Fated: OH MY GOD DUDE YOU JUST GOT HER PREGNANT

DM:………….mark experience. You have a permanent +3 modifier for the next quest……

And now I have to come up with children characters for the sequel campaign because I rolled too well on da p00sy!

6

Based on a fanfic by @geekwars-19 

For Pearlmethyst week day 1: First kiss 

@annadesu @fuckyeahpearlmethyst

Supergirl has actually ruined me. I went back to rewatch season one and the SECOND James stepped on scene i broke into tears because GODDAMN it i miss season one, I miss Cat, I miss Karolsen, I miss strong female representation, I miss Kara using her superhearing to be alerted to Ms Grant’s arrival at Catco, I miss the little Danvers sister moments, I miss when Kara was a strong independent woman who was just trying to find herself, I miss… i miss Supergirl. CBS Supergirl.
I’m going to go sob in my corner now, reminiscing about the old days.