On a rare occasion, a woman will tell me that she doesn’t mind being objectified by men. To that I say:
That’s nice, but he’s not doing it because you don’t mind. He’s not waiting until he finds you, the (probably) only woman in the area who doesn’t mind. He’s doing it to every woman. He’s doing it because he wants to and he doesn’t care who likes it, and who doesn’t. He doesn’t stick around long enough to ask, he just takes.
this was a sign in the bathroom of my school. the teachers went around the day after they were put up and threw them away. the signs were apparently a “distraction”. so not only are girls a distraction, but our opinions now are too.
Having a strong female character be confident and in control of her sexuality by wearing revealing outfits and not being ashamed to strut her stuff is fine.
But when 99.9% of all “strong female characters” somehow all express their “confidence in their sexuality” in the exact same way of revealing outfits and strutting their stuff…
That’s when you realize this is fake strength and confidence. It’s a thin veneer for bad writers to hide their obvious sexualization of the character which has nothing to do with a woman’s own confidence.
so today was an interesting experience for me. I received a message from Roosevelt High School saying that since the weather is becoming warmer we must dress appropriately for the season. I decided last night to wear the pants pictured. Mr.Scanga had stopped me going into the school and said that I could not attend my classes because of the holes in my jeans. I then asked to speak with our principal Mr.DeChent about my clothes. I was then told that he was not in the building and would have to get changed or go home. I proceeded to tell Mr.Scanga that I would wait for my parent or DeChent, whoever came first. I was then told I was being insubordinate and would be sent home. Upon arrival of my parental figure Mr.Scanga told my parent that there was a memo sent out to all teachers about enforcing this dress code. When asked for the paper handed out, it was conveniently nowhere to be found. Neither Secretary nor Assistant Principal had a copy. If the said “problem” is distracting for the male student body, they should be taught not to over sexualize the female body so much so that knees and thighs cause a “disruption for the orderly process of teaching and learning”. My outfit does not violate any aspect of the student dress code within Yonkers Public Schools Code of Conduct Page 5 Section 4 Paragraph 1. Roosevelt High School needs to stop this arbitrary dress code and sexist, or dare I say misogynistic practice.
some rando:idk why everyone is saying mad max is so feminist. i mean the first time you see the "wives" they're in like cloth bikinis and rinsing of in a fire hose all sexy-like
me:*crashes through a sliding glass door, knocks over a bunch of chairs, flips the bench he's sitting on* HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THAT THIS SCENE STRIKES YOU AS INHERENTLY SEXUAL BC YOU'RE USED TO SEEING WOMEN SEXUALIZED IN THIS WAY? THE "WIVES" HAD JUST SPENT HALF THE DAY IN A WAR RIG IN THE DESERT: THEY ARE RINSING OFF. NOT TO MENTION THE VERY NEXT SHOT SHOWS THEM CUTTING OFF CRUEL CHASTITY BELTS, A VISUAL REPRESENTATION OF THEIR REJECTION OF THEIR PRIOR STATUS AS SEXUAL OBJECTS AND POSSESSIONS. THIS SCENE APPEARS TO BE A CONVENTIONAL SEXIST TROPE BUT IN TRUTH IS A SUBVERSION OF WHAT WE'VE BEEN SOCIALIZED TO ACCEPT AS INNATELY SEXUAL-- MUCH THE LIKE ENTIRETY OF THE MOVIE.
So as some of you may know, I’m currently working as a teacher. Since the weather has been warm for nearly two months now, I have seen lots of dresses, skirts, hot pants/short shorts, crop tops, and borderline see-through blouses and tops.
Apparently, according to many in North America, this should be a huge distraction for me as a male teacher. However…
THE MOST DISTRACTING THING IS WHEN STUDENTS AREN’T PAYING ATTENTION AND TALKING TO EACH OTHER IN CLASS.
THAT IS MY BIGGEST IN-SCHOOL DISTRACTION.
WHY IS THIS SUCH A HARD CONCEPT FOR OTHER PEOPLE TO GRASP?!?!
People of all genders sexualize what they are sexually attracted to.
That’s called sexual attraction.
You can feel sexual attraction while still viewing someone as a person. It’s pretty simple actually.
My husband sexualizes me all the time, especially when I have no clothes on, but somehow he still values me as a person.
I don’t know how you feminists seem to forget that not only men are attracted to women as well, since you constantly blame only them for sexualizing women.
There are plenty of women who are sexually attracted to other women and plenty of men who have no sexual desire towards women.
I’m a bisexual woman and I constantly sexualize other women that I feel a sexual attraction to.
I also don’t see you showing any outcry towards movies like Magic Mike or any of the sexualization of men that happens in the media, video games, in other movies, and in general life.
That’s called being a hypocrite.
Don’t start crying oppression and who it happens more to because those things are not even related to this topic, but I know you really like to bring them up whenever someone brings up a point you don’t want to address. All you’re going to do is further my argument.
You either don’t support the sexualization of all human beings or you’re a hypocrite.
So, there’s no reason you shouldn’t write sexy female characters. That’d be kind of dumb. But it can be kind of confusing when you hear complaints about overly sexualized female characters and how that’s a Very Bad Thing. So what’s the real deal? How do you write legit sexy female characters without making them “sexualized” characters? We’ll look at a few factors you can keep in mind.
1. Character Agency
So why did your character choose to dress up in a skintight, cleavage-baring bodysuit?
If this is the “costume” your character chose for herself and she has a LEGIT reason for making that choice, then you’ve got a sexy lady on your hands. But it is important to make it clear that this is her decision, and it’s a decision that makes sense. No female warrior is going to choose a skin-baring barbarian get-up for the battlefield. Not unless it’s her first day going to war and she’s not going to have a second.
But a character like Catwoman, who needs to get around all slinky-like and who maybe, just maybe is hoping to distract a certain Bat before he can unleash his Bat Attack on her kitty cat ass most certainly would have good reason for choosing the costume that she does.
A person’s sexuality is never the core of their identity, so when you write characters who could be summed up as the “sexy chick” or the “sl*tty broad* you know it’s time to take a step back and look at what you’ve done.
It’s fine for a female character to be promiscuous. It’s even okay for her to be dangerously promiscuous, if the story calls for it. What’s not okay is for that to be your character’s sole identifier.
3. No Excuses
Please, please, please don’t explain away your character’s sexual habits and proclivities with some sort of excuse that “absolves” them of their “sins”. By doing so, you’re actually taking away agency and ownership - essentially, having the character wear their promiscuity like a costume. I said you don’t want to make a character’s sexuality the core of their identity, but you don’t want to strip it from their identity either.
It can “feel” like you’re empowering a character by letting her use her sexy to get whatever she wants. But the problem with this is that if you’re not careful, it can come across as you saying that’s the only weapon she has in her arsenal. Go ahead - let her use her sexy to get what she wants. But be sure she has other traits and attributes as well.
Remember - there’s no single, universal kind of sexy. Even a supermodel isn’t going to turn the head of everybody who’s into girls. So with that in mind, don’t write characters who literally entice everybody. Allow your female characters to develop strictly platonic friendships with straight guys/lesbians/bi peeps (…etc, you get my drift). Make sure there’s someone who sees beyond the sexy. If you give them that, the reader is much more likely to see beyond the sexy, too.
I’m sure there are a lot more points I could go over - this is just a starter to get you thinking a little more critically about sexy vs. sexualized.
The thing is, I really don’t like this argument that we can’t have sexy female characters, whether it’s in video games, or movies, or books, or comics, etc. It’s self-defeating and, really, beside the point. What needs to change is the way we write about these characters.
And it’s not that female characters can’t be overtly sexualized, either - sometimes that needs to happen for plot. (Think: Slave Leia in Star Wars). The difference being that this is something that is internal to the story. It happens for a reason and you’re not necessarily meant to enjoy her sexualization. Keep all this in mind in order to start writing more sex-positive stories.
I was reading some posts about how Dolls Kill is currently selling a sexualized “Native American” Costume. I went searching to see if they had any more, and surprisingly no. But seeing all the sexy style costumes made me think of Yandy.com, a lingerie website that is very much into Halloween costumes.
I thought hey, let’s give them the benefit of the doubt here. I liked them on facebook and they never posted appropriative costumes and I’ve never seen any sourced to them on facebook. I bet they totally realize the dangers and horrors of these costumes and fetishization like that.
Of which there are 55 costumes, oh sooo easily accessed through this category on the homepage and side bar
They don’t stop here. They have dedicated categories including Geisha Costumes, Eskimo Costumes, and G*psy Costumes.
And don’t forget the rest of them that may not have their own racist category, but are still there, scattered and hidden in other categories such as the 7 Day of the Dead costumes they have, and the “Aloha Hula Girl” and “Tahitian Sweetie” I also found, unfortunately. I don’t even know how the hell i found this “Dragon Lady” one, that surprisingly is not in the Geisha category.
The costume names range in each categories from ridiculous shit like “Chief Hottie Body Costume” to “Native American Temptress”, and “Japanese Entertainer Costume” to “Asian Persuasion”.
I honestly don’t understand this crap. How can people seriously fucking do this? How do you think it’s okay? Before even finding out about the proper terms like cultural appropriation and fetishization, before i even had any idea that this was a widely recognized thing by others, I almost always looked down on these costumes. I didn’t know that they were actually as horrible as they truly are, but I always had that sort of sense within myself you know? How can you just throw on someone’s culture and not give a fuck about it whether its a sexualized costume like these, a less sexualized one, or even a legitimate cultural garment.
I could continue going on and on but I’m just so tired of this shit. Just.Fucking.Stop. Whether or not YOU agree with it, costumes like this hurt people. It promotes stereotypical fetishization that becomes the leading reason behind countless rapes. Culturally appropriative costumes in general hurt the people that are part of that culture. By wearing this shit, you are taking a part something that is so important to so many people and destroying it, showing us what a gross racist asshole you are in the process.
There are a million perfectly fine things you can dress up as, so why the fuck do you have to do this to my culture? Go be a fucking octopus or something I don’t even care.
Today in psychology we learned that men who are repeatedly and regularly exposed to erotic and sexual images of women will find their wives/girlfriends less attractive.
So, basically we live in a society that insidiously commodifies and sexualizes women on TV, in magazines, on billboards and in movies, and that in turn makes them less attractive to the men who are being exposed to this eroticized caricature of real women. It’s a catch-22 that keeps socializing women to believe that their value lies in their physical appearance, but their physical appearance will never be good enough. The commodification of female bodies has to stop; the sexism in mass media has to stop.
When it comes to gaming, sexism isn’t isolated to Gamergate or sexist players. The games themselves often feature hypersexualized female characters that seem to defy any sense of reality. To combat this, Bulimia.com showed what they might look like with more average bodies — and you won’t even recognize Lara Croft.
Much of social injustice and marginalization is what I refer to as “death by a thousand cuts.” One instance, or five or maybe even ten, would be something that most people can bounce back from or just ignore. A lifetime of these occurrences, though? Not so much. The concept of microaggressions is based on this reality.
Many people really don’t seem to get this, which is why there is so much backlash to criticism of Matt Taylor’s shirt and stuff like that. Everyone’s like “WOW ONE SHIRT WITH NAKED CHICKS WHAT’S THE BIG DEAL.” In fact, if this was the one time in our lives that we saw naked women displayed for our entertainment, it would probably be a very small deal.
It’s not just sexualized women on his shirt. It’s sexualized women in magazines. It’s sexualized women in calendars in offices. It’s sexualized women at company outings. It’s sexualized women in advertisements, films, comics, TV shows, music videos, billboards, art, fashion. It’s sexualized women in videos that are supposed to be promoting science to young girls as a viable career option.
It’s the fact that my 12-year-old brother, who wants to go to MIT and become an engineer, probably watched that video because WOW COOL LANDING SHIT ON COMETS. My little brother, who, if he isn’t dating now, will be in a few years, and if he dates girls, he will remember all these images too. It’s not just about how girls and women see themselves.
…after they’ve been sexualized and hounded and harassed and bombarded from pretty much every angle with the notion that they are sexual objects, there to be sexualized and fantasized about and pursued, then they get ripped to shreds for being too sexy.
“Here’s your daily reminder that even though female representation in Hollywood may be improving incrementally, we’ve got a long way to go.
Producer Ross Putnam, who’s worked on projects like First Girl I Loved and Bad Samaritans, has started a Twitter account (@femscriptintros) to chronicle the actual intros for female leads from actual scripts that he reads.
We’ve embedded some of the more grievous intros below (note that Putnam changes the name of all the female characters to JANE).”