severus snape mine

Slytherin Headcanons

• saying ‘shut up’ while laughing
• being extremely nice and understanding towards their friends but unapologetically sarcastic towards others
• speaking of sarcasm: they speak it fluently
• ‘I love you but I love myself more’
• going on long hikes by themselves
• they either go to bed early or don’t sleep at all
• they sleep with stuffed animals but deny it
• they never give up
• challenges are a great pastime
• saying ‘Tragic.’ way too often
• not everyone of them likes Snape
• 'No I am NOT good at potions and you can NOT copy my homework’
• falling asleep to rain
• nearly everyone of them has referred to Draco as a 'wimp’ or 'sissy’
• they will kill you if you insult their pet
• being proud of their background no matter who they are
• yes, there are muggleborn Slytherin’s
• they inniciate snowball fights
• complaining about small things
• 'I AM NOT YELL…I am not yelling.’

Gryffindor Headcanons

Hufflepuff Headcanons

Ravenclaw Headcanons

Gryffindor Headcanons

• petting every dog they see
• saying ‘yolo’ in a sarcastic way until it becomes a habit
• hurting someone by accident and laughing so hard about it that they forget to apologise
• ‘I’m not a drama queen I’m just….yeah okay I am’
• getting distracted easily when trying to do school work
• being great at giving speeches in front of the class and being very eloquent in other situations as well
• annoying friends on purpose
• throwing their dirty worn clothes on the floor after undressing
• loud singing under the shower
• being overly dramatic when they’ve caught a cold but pretending like nothing is wrong when they’ve broken several limbs, burned all their hair and nearly died because they ‘wanted to try something out’
• getting sun burned after falling asleep outside
• having too much coffee
• convincing friends doing something with them with the phrase 'Come on! It’ll be fun!’
• friends are family
• nothing is impossible and therefore everything must be tried
• being able to accomplish anything as soon as they’re excited about it

Hufflepuff Headcanons

Slytherin Headcanons

Ravenclaw Headcanons

If you ever feel sad just remember that Snape had to teach Luna potions too

Snape: What…are you doing, Miss Lovegood?

Luna: I decided not to make this potion, Professor. It has bad energy.

Snape: You…what?

Luna: Bad energy. Bad. But I revitalized this flower for you from the ingredients and you can put it in your hair.

Snape: …..

Luna: I think it would look very nice on you. Keeps away the Wrackspurts, you know.

Snape: *awkward slides away*


Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban - Chapter Fourteen: Snape’s Grudge

As though an invisible hand were writing upon it, words appeared on the smooth surface of the map.

“Mr. Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people’s business.”

Snape froze. Harry stared, dumbstruck, at the message. But the map didn’t stop there. More writing was appearing beneath the first.

Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr. Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git.

It would have been very funny if the situation hadn’t been so serious. And there was more… .

“Mr. Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor.”

Harry closed his eyes in horror. When he’d opened them, the map had had its last word.

“Mr. Wormtail bids, Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball.”

The marauders obviously did some fucked up things to Snape, but can I remind everyone that canonically, James and Severus were rivals. Not just a bully and his victim, as far too many people seem to think.


make me choose: @newtscamder asked potions or divination

“As there is little foolish wand-waving here, many of you will hardly believe this is magic. I don’t expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron with its shimmering fumes, the delicate power of liquids that creep through the human veins, bewitching the minds, ensnaring the senses… I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, and even stopper death - if you aren’t as big a bunch of dunderheads as I usually have to teach.”


My favourite A Very Potter Sequel moments;

Snape: I would like to take this opportunity to announce the Hogwarts’ astronomy club. This year we’ll be paying particularly close attention to the cycles of the moon and its effects on certain professors.