seriously derek

4

That Which You Cannot Undo  by: uraneia

Because the man standing on Stiles’s front porch is easily the most attractive person Stiles has ever laid eyes on. Cheekbones like cut glass. Stubble so even you could sand a canoe. Dark hair, straight nose, eyes like a watercolor painting. He looks kinda pissed. Stiles thinks, Damn, I wish I’d put on real pants.

Then he gets a hit of the guy’s aura and makes time for even more regrets.

Before he even knows it’s a tell he’s stepping back, already calling on his spark, letting power gather at his fingertips, though Goddess knows he can’t pull enough to put down a werewolf. Not one this powerful. The taste of all that strength is fresh, simmering just beneath the surface.

Stiles can see the second the guy figures out he’s a witch. His nostrils twitch and his eyes flash red.

But he doesn’t look angry anymore. In fact, he just seems… surprised. “Uh,” he says as his eyes fade back to green-brown. “Hi.”

Stiles lets the magic dissipate. It takes the last of his headache with it, and he curses himself for not thinking of that earlier. A little adrenaline rush goes a long way. “Hi,” he parrots. “Um. So you’re a werewolf.”

The man nods. “And you’re a mage.”

With a snort, Stiles corrects the word. “A witch. I’m far too young to be a mage.”

That earns him a curious look, but the guy doesn’t ask for elaboration. “My name is Derek Hale. I’m looking for Dr. Martin.”

Of course. A ridiculously hot werewolf shows up on Stiles’s doorstep. Who else would he be there for? “Well, you’d better come in, then,” he says. He’s wary, but he doesn’t actually sense any malicious intent. “Have you eaten breakfast?”

By twenty-eight, Stiles has resigned himself to a quiet life of working in his magic shop, selling Jackson Whittemore fart-inducing tea, and looking after his goddaughter. It’s a good life. But the quiet goes to hell when his sister, Lydia, shows up with a crispy werewolf in her trunk and a bite mark on her shoulder, because hard on her heels comes the hottest person Stiles has ever seen, and he happens to be looking for his uncle.

You know, the dead guy Stiles helped Lydia bury last night.

(Or: the Pracitical Magic AU nobody asked for.)

okay so you know the video of the guy who forgot he was married to his wife? that but with Nursey as the guy and Dex as the wife but instead of Dex responding with “I’m your husband” when Nursey asks if he’s an angel he says “Close. I’m actually a Nurse.”

and Nursey doesn’t understand for a sec what that means he’s just like “oh. that’s chill.” and Dex laughs and then the doctor comes in like “is everything alright Mr. Nurse?” and Nursey realizes the doctor is referring to him and then he looks at Dex and then at the doctor and his eyes go wide and he’s like “you’re my husband?!”

and honestly Dex would give both his kidneys and half a lung to see Nursey’s face light up like that again god i love these boys

During his move to Washington, DC, Stiles made a number of realizations about life, the most prominent of which was that it was amazing what kind of hobbies a guy could pick up when his days weren’t packed full of running for his life from various supernatural horrors. Like trivia nights, for example. Stiles had a regular team and the entire bar groaned when they walked in because they knew they were about to get creamed.

Or the tabletop gaming club he joined, where everyone was just as competitive as he was, and punches had been thrown on more than one occasion.

Or like, Stiles jogged now.

Through the National Mall.

Like Captain America or some shit.

And with these hobbies came a sort of routine, and though most were on hold during the summer when his trivia team and gaming rivals were back home, the running stuck. It was calming and got his mind off things, gave him a chance to think about any papers he had to write, or de-stress about his FBI internship when it got a little hectic.

It was a good routine.

So every Saturday morning, Stiles got up a little earlier so he could get in his longer route, and left his dorm for his jog through the National Mall. On Saturdays, he took the path that went through the war memorials, down into West Potomac Park, and over to the Jefferson Memorial. It was his favorite place to take a breather because that early in the morning, there were rarely any tourists, and other joggers left him alone. It was nice and private, with a great view of the city across the water.

Stiles leaned back against the front steps and glanced around him casually, making sure there was no one too close before pulling out his little burner flip phone.

He had an old school drug dealer flip phone. His dad would be so proud.

There was only one number the phone ever called, so there was no need to save it under a name.

He waited for a few minutes, biding his time until the clock hit 7:15am, and then he called that number.

On the third ring, Derek picked up.

“Morning, sunshine!” Stiles greeted, already wide awake from his jog. Derek grunted back. He must’ve had a late night at the bar. “Any leads?”

Derek yawned loudly. “Still no werewolves with triskele tattoos, still wanted for murder.”

Keep reading

CM Incorrect Quote #25

Derek: Using y=mx+b to measure the slope of that ass.

Spencer: Mathematically incorrect.  Unless the ass was linear, but that’s biologically incorrect.  You’d probably wanna use something like y=ax^2+bx+c because the ass is the second-degree polynomial curve.

Derek: ….

Derek: Did you major in booty math?

candybarrnerd  asked:

hi Rachel *waves* I just wanted to say, I know that some people say that Derek seems to awkward to have really been in relationships, but I like to think the scene at the Sheriff's office/holding cells with Derek 'distracting' the officer says otherwise. Up until that point we've seen an angry Derek, and a... difficult(? not sure if that is the right word) Derek, but then we get to see that when in the right situation, or when he has a reason to, Derek can be social and flattering 1/2

and make you feel like you are the centre of his attention, which would be like, wow. And I think that really plays into the headcanon that I, you and a lot of others have that Derek hooked up a lot, but wasn’t in relationships emotionally, because he would turn that on, but he’s also working on hiding himself a lot of the time, so it’s easier to just hook up then try and continue that. I’m sure this point has been made by so many people before. But it’s something I think of

I agree with this so much. That scene, if nothing else, shows that Derek knows exactly how attractive he is and how to use his looks to get what he wants. I don’t actually know that the two ideas are mutually exclusive, though –– while Derek is one hundred percent comfortable with using his body, with playing on people’s attraction to him, and possibly even with casual sex, I also think he’d probably be very awkward when it comes to relationships.

Because physical is easy. Physical is impersonal. And I think there’s probably a very serious, Kate-induced disconnect in his brain between what is appealing about him (his body) and what’s not (who he actually is). Not to mention the trust issues going back the other way –– sure, he can have sex with strangers, how’s that likely to hurt him? His body can heal from anything they might do to him physically so he’s never really in danger, and if they do end up hurting him (personally, I tend to assume Derek went after the type likely to hurt him because he wouldn’t want to risk ending up with anyone he might develop feelings for, or who might get hurt because of him) then what does that matter anyway, right?

*sighs at our boy*

But once emotions get involved? Once he starts caring about a person? That would send everything Derek hates about himself and everything he’s scared of crashing over him all at once. It would make him vulnerable in a way simple sex doesn’t, and I think he’d be incredibly hesitant and awkward (too harsh and too soft, shaky and hesitant and too fast to pull back because everything he cares about shatters on him and he can’t have this shatter, not this and…)

And I can absolutely see Derek putting on the charm for strangers –– waiters at diners, visiting packs, that woman working at the occult bookstore when they’re trying to figure out how to banish those pixies –– and Stiles just getting slowly crushed by the “knowledge” that Derek’s so obviously attracted to all these random people the second he meets them and not Stiles, never Stiles, because he’s never seen that smile directed toward him, that’s for sure.

Until he starts realizing that Derek never follows through with any of these people. He trades smiles with them, flirts with them, but when Stiles “I can absolutely be an adult about this and not crumble in the face of my hopeless crush” asks him about any of them, Derek will just send him a blank look and say Stiles knows as much about them as he does.

And Stiles might not get the too-bright smiles, but he gets Derek coming to him every time there’s a crisis, and then sometimes when there’s not a crisis, and then sometimes staring at him for too long and looking away fast when Stiles tries to meet his gaze. He gets Derek’s hands on him soft after every battle, checking him over for wounds until another pack member walks in and Derek falls back, head ducked and acting weirdly flustered about the contact. And maybe it takes so long for Stiles to connect what’s going on as feelings because he’s associated Derek and all his hotness and all that charm he puts on when he wants to as Derek liking someone behavior because seriously… how can someone that beautiful and assertive not be the type of person to just tell people outright when he wants them?

But wanting is so much different than wanting, and Derek might be an expert at one but he is absolutely a fragile baby duckling at the other.

5

Keys and Christmas Lights – Valentine’s day Sterek Dance!AU on AO3 (inspired by this)

Stiles’ fingers clenched in Derek’s hair, holding him with desperation as he stormed his lips. Derek reacted with a shameless murmur of appreciation, letting Stiles to slowly take control over his body. He felt this long fingers slipping out of his hair, stroking his skin with the same rhythm as Stiles’ biting into his lips. They ran gently through his shoulder, causing an involuntary shiver when finally slipped between Derek’s thighs, drawing him even closer to Stiles’ hot body.

“I knew…” Stiles said between one kiss and the other, “I knew you don’t like candles,” he whispered in a hurry. Stopping for a moment, he added with a warm huff, “So I used Christmas lights instead.”

For the fandom and for this extraordinary girl whose talent dazzles me every single time… yes, I mean you kala-fiorek ^^ and yes, she drew that amazing art!

*shouts into the void*: DOES ANYONE a) WATCH LEVERAGE B) FEEL LIKE SCREAMING ABOUT THE ELIOT/PARKER/HARDISON OT3 OR C) SEE ALL OF THE STEREK AU POTENTIAL THAT THIS SHOW PROVIDES

Criminal Minds Coffee Shop Headcanons
  • Hotch: Orders black coffee with a dash of milk, comes in every morning before work and every day at lunchtime...and sometimes after work, always one of the first people in, has a strange attachment to the danishes
  • Derek: Is constantly changing his order, lets people cut in front of him in line if they look like they're having a bad day, flirts with the barista, goes to the donut shop across the street as well to flirt with her...and for the donuts
  • Spencer: Orders way too much coffee- drinks it all, puts too much sugar to be healthy in his coffee, reads an entire book while waiting in line, will unashamably come in at like 10 o'clock at night, secretly obsessed with the muffins
  • Rossi: Orders straight up black coffee, sits in the corner and writes for hours and hours but also people watches, comes in every Sunday, Mr. Banana Bread
  • Emily: Gets the seasonal lattes, when she doesn't know what to get she orders a cappucino or caramel macchiato, gets to know the other regulars, the type that would tell the barista a fake/inside joke/pun/movie reference name, brings her own cup, feels fancy when she orders scones for some reason
  • JJ: Worships the hot chocolate, more than definitely a cake-pop kinda girl, if she does get coffee it's usually decaf, brings the kids in sometimes so they can get hot chocolate with her
  • Garcia: Has an insanely long, obscure order, but personally gets to know every single one of the baristas so it's okay, has tried every single pastry that is for sale

Thank you for 1000 followers!

I never thought so many of you guys would be interested in my art, thank you <3 So this is just some mostly recognizable magic!Stiles and Derek for you (≧ω≦)

(click for higher res as usual)