seriously a newspaper

“SHOES, is it? We used to DREAM of shoes! When I were young five of us used to have to stuff our feet into two old hanky boxes, and all shuffle to school through the snow. We didn’t Lord it up like you with SHOES and everything.”

  • someone: yeah I don't really believe in astrology? it's kind of unrealistic
  • me: yeah I feel you, that's cool, I feel the same way honestly
  • someone else: astrology is STUPID FUCKING BULLSHIT and everyone that has ever read a horoscope in their whole lives is an IDIOT and I only associate with TRUE INTELLECTUALS THANK YOU VERY MUCH
  • me: lmao calm down ophiuchus ur messing with my aura
Bessie, Nessie’s second cousin.

Of course Bessie is not literally Nessie’s second cousin. However Bessie is popular, primarily on Lake Eire. 

Bessie is obviously not the cow, but a lake monster sighted int he infamous Great Lake. It stems from local legend in the early years:  

 "For a number of years, vague stories about huge serpents have come with each recurring season from Dominion/Canadian shores, and now, at last, the existence of these fierce monsters is verified and the fact so well established that it can no longer be questioned,“ wrote a reporter in the July 8, 1898, edition of the Daily Register of Sandusky, Ohio.

The monster reported was able to live both on land and in water. It was a "fierce, ugly, coiling thing, call it a snake or what you will.” It was said to be 25 to 30 feet long and a foot in diameter. 

Locally, the monster had been dismissed as a joke, nothing to be taken seriously. Such as a newspaper wrote about witness sightings with a teeth-filled mouth, and conveniently the date was April 1st.

Unfortunately, in 1931, a local newspaper, the Register, wrote the beast had been captured by two residents. Unfortunately, a writer for the New York Times, who was vacationing there, picked up the story and wrote about it. A curator from the natural history museum in Cincinnati came to the small town and declared the “monster” as an Indian python. The two residents quickly left town.

 Many many sightings had persisted over the years, then in the early-1990s it went into full swing. 

Such as this video form 1991 near Kelley’s Island:

In 1993 the Wall Street Journal wrote it off as all a marketing ploy to bring people to the small town of Huron. Ironically enough, the small town became a hotbed of cryptozoologist wannabes and established the research center, and the Huron Lagoon Marina offered a $100,000 for the beats capture. it was never claimed.

David Davies (what a name, right?) a biologists for fisheries for the Ohio Division of Wildlife proposed it most likely is a sturgeon. Which makes sense, since in the 1800s the area was known as the caviar capital of North America as there were so many sturgeon in the lake. The population has since been nearly fished out. Still, in 1998 a large sturgeon was captured at 250lbs. 

Famous internet chain picture of a giant sturgeon. More specifically a white river sturgeon.

This is the most reasonable answer due to the problems of lacking a large breeding population for sustainment. Since 1993, there have been few to no sightings of “Bessie.” So it seems like the fad had about died out, or whatever Bessie was has died out as well.

Finally saw Miraculous Ladybug Episode 1 in English and...

I’ve come to the conclusion that the English translators need to be sat down and beaten over the heads with newspapers. Seriously, that’s where the majority of the problems came from. Nino could’ve used a few less ‘dudes’ and 'bros.’ The writers could’ve remembered that there is a better (read: real word) for 'evilize’/'devilize.’ It’s called possession and cleansing. Kids do know what those words mean and if they don’t they’re going to get the idea pretty quickly.

I was worried that some of Adrien’s dialogue would be stiff and stilted because the writers were trying to make him sound formal and proper but he actually came off sounding a little bit more like an average teenager. Makes me glad because this was my biggest worry for the English dub.

Also thought that “Bubbler” was a good first episode for the English speaking audience. It pretty quickly gave watchers an idea of Ladybug and Chat Noir’s powers as well as the limitations they have with said powers. Audiences don’t get to experience the full force of Chat’s crush for Ladybug yet but they can see that they are obviously good friends and that Chat is a bit of a joker. This will help to establish that Marinette doesn’t quite take his flirting, and therefore affections, seriously which was something that I never really truly came across to me in the subbed versions. We get a pretty decent snapshot of who our main characters are though I was face palming when I realized that stalker!Marinette is the VERY FIRST impression English speaking audiences got of Marinette. For those of you just coming in, I swear to God, Marinette’s infatuation isn’t her only characteristic.

I also figured out why Ivan wasn’t dancing and acting like a giant sour puss (which got him bubbled and sent floating) in that episode. (Spoilers!!!) It’s because he was watching Mylene slow dance with Nathanael! Excuse me while I start screaming. (My precious secondary OTP)

Will I watch the second episode? Yep! Because I am a heaping pile of trash!