sell you to satan

7

Joe Biden + Guide to Troubled Birds 

how fan girls/boys see Ink:

Ink is so precious and I absolutely adore how innocent he is #sopure

how Ink actually is:

I would sell you to satan for one- what was I saying.

Fav lines from BTS fanfiction (pt.1)

“He’s delicate! He won’t survive in there!”
“He’s not delicate, his biceps are bigger than your goddamn thigh.”
“HE DRINKS BEER WITH HIS PINKIES OUT, HE’S DELICATE.”


Yeah, that’s right, we’re not even dating and I still paid, whuddup. Gentleman level wildebeest right here.


and for christ’s sake Yoongi touch his ass at least once you vanilla piece of shit. remember the you-know-whats are in those kitty socks i keep in the back of our closet❤ have fun being a Gaylord no matter what jesus loves you!!1!1!


“12/10 would quantum smash into the fourth dimension,”


“you know what i think? you should date someone that ruins your underwear and not your makeup”


“I don’t believe in vanilla cheesecake unseasoned hardboiled eggs shit if it’s just a quick fuck,”


“Just you wait Min Yoongi. You will rue the day you insulted my weenis.”


“Don’t you dare put your meat juice in my cereal,”


“He looks like he belongs in heaven, right next to the giant bowls of lollipops and the Cat Fancy magazines.”


i’ll send u my address in like 2 sec i have to go look @ the mailbox bc i forgot it


Jeongguk hiccups out a sob. “Oh my God,” he sniffles, letting the tears run down his face in hot, wet streams. “Your dick is so cute.”


[MIN.Y has removed KIM.N from the group]
KIM.S: Yoongi-yah I’ve told you so many times you can’t just remove people like that it’s rude!
[MIN.Y has removed KIM.S from the group]


“I would sell you to satan for one cornchip,”


“YOU ARE AN IMPURE CHILD, REPENT AND PUT YOUR TONGUE BACK IN YOUR MOUTH,”


“I am going to get out of this chair specifically to kill you, you little shit,”


“I’ve been in a relationship with my hand for the past 23 years,”


“Silence, peasant number 5,”


“I am a good bean, so please take care of me”


“Jeon Jungkook is, in fact, a living meme.”

When it comes to fiction you got problematic favs and then you got like garbage favs.

Like problematic favs have done some shit, ruined some lives, can be anything from like a superhero with one big mistake to an antihero who is trying their best. They got like a handful of redeemable qualities that makes you like them despite their many flaws. Maybe you wanna shake some sense into them. Maybe you wanna see them get better. Depends on the problematic part of the equation.

Then you got your garbage favs. Villains who have like one good quality max and that might be that they have a sense of humor and that’s it. They would sell you to Satan for one corn chip. They would steal candy from a baby. These characters you will be happy to see get punched in the face, you love them but they are garbage people, please kick their ass, they are the worst. If they died you would mourn their loss as an interesting character but be like “they totally had it coming good riddance you sack of shit”

3

Can we just….lord look at this rude shit. WHAT EVEN IS A BIAS? Is it a short period of time? A trick? No definitely a satanic ritual in which you sell your soul…and Satan just happens to be PARK MF JINYOUNG.

CR: @jypnior

sans-the-skeleton-999  asked:

More Lance head cannons please? (He's my fav)

lance is my son thank you for this opportunity

  • “hunk, what’s lance doing?” “his best”
  • is That Guy who’ll stand in the same room as you and groan and sigh dramatically until you ask him what’s wrong
  • get really homesick easily which is sad but also kinda funny?? he starts tearing up over the weirdest shit
    • *sees a plant* “this reminds me vaguely of a flower in the bouquet my mamá gave my tío antonio at his wedding four years and nine months ago” “is lance crying”
  • has gone into battle w the face mask and lion slippers on
  • occasionally gets the vague impression that shiro is gonna pull La Chancla on him and it stresses him out
  • his self care routine is religious and he’s too proud to actually ask anyone for advice so instead he just follows coran around the castle for days trying to figure out how he keeps his mustache so perfectly coiffed
  • “keith that’s a stupid plan and there’s no way i’m going along with it” “why, are you chicken?” “…..fuck you i’m not let’s go”
  • is still lowkey bitter about allura’s comment about his ears
  • pidge: “i would sell you to satan for two corn chips” lance, patting pidge on the head: “love u too lil buddy”
Edgy Fluff Hcs

A promise is a promise and i am a onion of my words;

  • Dark tends to have a lot of muscular problems due to how stressed and overwhelmed he is in a constant daily basis, he often suffers a lot of spine/back pain and headaches due to this. 
    Anti is totally aware of this and that is why when Dark is laying down ( when he ever lays down) Anti sits on him so he doesn’t move and starts doing massages on his upper back. 
    You can hear the cracking Dark’s back while he does so, those were very needed.
  • Then Dark stretches like a grumpy cat and is tbh so pleased but won’t thank him cause that would mean being nice.
  • Anti says ‘you’re welcome’ anyways. 
  • Dark is fan of romantic movies with sad endings, Anti prefers action movies or horror with gore. 
    Even though its not what he prefers Anti sits through Dark’s old-timey novellas without complaining.
    He says he can hear Dark’s faint heart beat faster while he watches them though he is showing no emotion.
  • When dark is-uh- preparing the meat for a dinner he often invites Anti to do it because he knows how much he enjoys the gore of it. 
    Anti looks like a 5 year old with a new toy every single time. 
  • As i already said before, Dark washes Anti’s hoodies cause the virus is just lazy. But he does not stop there, poor man ends up doing the full laundry very often. 
  • Anti knows how soul wrecking (from his point of view) is to wash clothes so in a exchange he ends up cleaning Dark’s room. When it ever needs some sort of cleaning. 
  • Dark has a tendency of scratching the back of Anti’s ears when he does a good job on something. Anti loves it. 
  • Even though it is rare, when Dark has his downer moments Anti is the one to drag him out of his room or even medicate him accordingly. In these Dark is almost unresponsive so that takes a lot of effort. 
  • In the other hand when Anti has his psychotic episodes it always ends up with Dark hugging Anti tight and locking him on place so he does not create any more havoc on their home. Anti does the impossible to break free, from mutilating the back of Dark with his claws of chewing his neck out, still does not work because Dark is determined in not moving, no matter how much it hurts. It takes at least a week for Dark to recover from the bad ones, which is why under his neat suit sometimes he is wrapped in bandages.
  • Even though these two are constantly colliding due to how different they are, they managed to have a working and healthy (in their sense) living environment. These took years to generate. You can say they finally learned to appreciate the differences they have.
  • Dark has a collection of ties, Anti tries to help by stealing getting him new ones, even though he is not aware, Anti has a terrible fashion sense and the ties end up being awful in patterns.
  • Dark still uses these ugly af ties his fav one is the one with the ugly flamingos on it. 
  • The main reason Dark got into cooking ( and is now a amazing chef) and hunting is because in the early days Anti would simply not eat at all.
    This would end up in him being a sack of bones for days which Dark found both disturbing and worrying. 
  • “What type of food you like?”
    “A type i cannot get locked up in here.”
    “Try me”
  • Oh and let me mention of cheesy Anti gets when he tries to calm down a furious Dark.
  • “NO ONE EVER LISTENS TO ME, IT IS ALWAYS MARK, MARK, MARK”
    “No it is not, i would sell Mark to Satan for a corn chip and you know that. I’m here and I listen, please calm down, it’s okay, tell me what is bothering you.”
  • Anti wears Dark’s suits when he is out of clean clothes, these often are too big for him so they look hilarious on him, except the pants, the pants are always too short for Anti.

I have more so ya’ll let me know if you want me to write more.