shibolet3  asked:

Wait what con artist from 2014

I’d like to title this story “Swing And A Miss

Okay, so my high school had this program where seniors could leave school like a month and a half early and opt out of exams if they took on internships around the neighborhood, but not everyone wanted to/was eligible to do it. Back in like 2013, they had like 15 bored seniors stuck in the school, so the administration brought in this Professional Life Coach, left him in alone in a room with them for two hours to talk to them about like, self-esteem or some shit. All the kids were pulled out of their classes for this*, and later told the administration that they loved him, they really enjoyed the talk.

So, about a year later, we have a new principal. He’s supposed to set up an assembly for all the 11th and 12th graders, but he doesn’t know what to do. One of his coworkers mentions that there was a life coach that was a huge hit with the kids that didn’t do community study last year, so maybe he’d also be great for a larger audience. The principal basically thinks “okay, what the hell” and calls up and hires Jason C. Jean to come talk to the kids.

Now, it’s like, 10:30, maybe 11:00 in the morning, and two entire grades are getting shepherded to the main gymnasium, and no one wants to God damn be there. We ain’t got time for self esteem talks. We want to sleep. And this guy, watching us all drag our feet in and collapse into the bleachers was just like…offensively peppy. There’s a couple faculty members sitting behind him, the woman who suggested he be hired for this, the vice principals for the grades- but the principal himself kept getting calls so he was in and out the whole time.

Now, Mr. Jean was like…the chill “Just call me by my first name dude” history professor at college times 30. He was trying so fucking hard. I’m referring to him as ‘Mr. Jean’ in this story just to be disrespectful. So anyway, we all get in there, and he tells us right off the bat “You guys are totally allowed to be on your phones and laptops during this! I get it! It’s no problem, like really, I insist!” so while the faculty members are exchanging smiles that read ‘how do we kill that while respecting him’, all the kids are immediately pulling out their electronics and he’s starts his speech.

Now, again, I really wanna reiterate that he told us we could be on our phones- because when the news articles started coming out about this, I remember all these angry, annoying comments from old people like “Why the hell were the students on their phones in the first place! So disrespectful! These damn millennials and their social media!” like, they were completely ignoring the entire story and just focusing in on kids using the internet, and it Really Super Pissed Me Off, so. Again, we had permission for this (which also ended up being Mr. Jean’s fatal mistake).

So, he starts off this speech fairly normally, like ‘hi, I’m Jason, I’m a professional life coach and I wanna teach you kids about how to be The Best You!’ and like people were tuning him out and listening to varying degrees. Some kids (like myself) were kinda dozing off, and everyone was on twitter or facebook.

His approach to a self esteem speech seemed to be ‘let me tell you my entire life story for hours’ and like, at first I was like “I’m not really hearing this, I’m half dreaming right now” but the more I started making myself pay attention the more…bizarre and rambling his story got.

So like, for instance, he told us he drank a lot in high school. Like, a lot. But he didn’t use that as a ‘don’t drink or party too hard’ lesson, instead he was like “I was fourteen so I always called my parents to pick me up, and they weren’t mad because they knew it meant I could trust them. So remember, always tell your parents when you’re drinking!” and then it kinda got to a point where it sounded like he was encouraging partying and drinking and the like to the group of underage kids.

And then, he told us how he used to play baseball all the time when he was a kid, and at 16 reached a crossroads in his life where the Phillies wanted to draft him or he could go play football for Penn State. And he said he went with Penn State but later lost the scholarship for some reason and we’re like…really.

There was absolutely nothing coherent about anything he was saying- nothing that tied anything together, made a point, seemed like it had anything to do with an assembly on self esteem. He told us at one point he was making upwards of 7 million a year. He told us one time before college he was homeless. He told us he used to own a construction company and built his own branch of nightclubs himself, that he and his friend then ran. He told us he fought a shark and came out with no scars. He told us that he had less money now, because after surviving a work related accident- direct quote- “I fell almost 30 feet and I broke in half” - he decided to leave that industry and spend more time with his family.

So, yeah, I was pretty positive this was bullshit, but there were clearly kids in the room that were falling for it. But then he said something like…he and his friend got bored one day and started jarring up their own pasta sauce, and made a deal with wegmans or some store like that to start selling it, and now he has a pasta sauce empire. Like he spent 15 fucking minutes on this. The way he kept saying ‘pasta sauce’ was so annoying I was about to claw my ears out. But anyway, two girls in my grade wanted to find out what brand he was talking about, so they googled his name.

And then quietly gasped.

And then furiously started typing into their phones.

And remember- everyone, even though they were paying attention- was on twitter and facebook. All the sudden I see heads flying up and wide eyes and people whispering to each other. Mr. Jean doesn’t seem to notice the change and keeps rambling on, but I know something happened so I google him too and-

Okay so basically he’s 1) been arrested, 2) filed for bankruptcy like three times and 3) has been hailed as a ‘Swinger Guru’ by playboy.


So by now, this is a fucking game- he still doesn’t notice anything wrong amongst the kids, so we’re all silently texting each other to fill each other in. Pulling up receipts. But still playing the part of politely intrigued audience members. The school faculty have no fucking idea what’s going on, until one of the students texts her mom, who happens to be the woman that convinced the principal to hire this guy. We see her check her phone, go wide-eyed, and she runs out of the fucking room presumably to either find the principal or hide in terror.

So Mr. Jean had been talking to random people intermittently throughout this speech, but we reach the ‘questions’ part of it. Everyone seems to silently agree that instead of just asking him anything outright, we should just see how good of a liar he was. So they’d be asking him stuff like ‘how much money did you make with ____ company’ and he’d give a ridiculously high number as people were sending each other reports of him filing for bankruptcy during that time. Or they asked him about his construction business which he said was great, and while he was talking about how great it was we were all reading his arrest report, from when a woman hired him to build her house, and he took her money and then like…just didn’t build anything. Wild. Someone asked him about his family and he’s extolling Christian virtues while we’re all on the website for his annual Swing Fest. People would ask him how he got certain jobs and he was making promises to hook kids up in interviews and shit. Everyone was loosing their God damn minds online and just barely holding it together in person. This man was so beyond full of shit- like, he was a God awful life coach but his dedication to lying was inspirational.

We eventually get to leave and everyone is yelling and cracking up and freaking out, all running to our classes to tell the teachers and the underclassmen everything, and the teachers are freaking out, alternating between horrified confusion and laughing hysterically. Before the school day even ended, someone had called a bunch of news stations. The principal was freaking out and denying he had anything to do with it, before calling some students to his office to see what exactly the kids had searched up on the guy…Because apparently teenagers can perform better background checks than school officials. It was all anyone could talk about for weeks.

A couple months after this, for my theater class’ showcase, I wrote and directed a skit called ‘Mason B. Mean’. It was a huge hit. The principal was in the audience. I’ve never seen a grown man look so dead inside. I made sure I was out of the room before he came up to congratulate the cast and everything. The next day, my theater teacher told me his only comment about the skit was a quiet, long-suffering “Why.” 😂😂

Annnnnnnnd that’s the time a Swinger Entrepreneur rambled on about pasta sauce and money in front of teenagers who knew how to use google for almost two hours.

Emily: I heard people use “party like Corvo Attano” as an idiom back in Karnaca, any idea where this came from?

Corvo, staring blankly, dead as a marble statue and not s single muscle on his face twitching, for a second, before the camera cuts to another scene with extreme abruptness, from deafening silence to the loud cacophony of a busy pub, with his 18-year-old self sitting at the top of a self-assembled chair pyramid, wearing a necklace made entirely of bloodfly husks and a flowery patterned shirt unbuttoned halfway through and chugging on a 2L bottle of imported river crust distilled vodka as the entire crowd yells and whistles, encouraging him: no idea pumpkin
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KI ecobe is a self-assembled modular shoe that uses no toxic adhesives. The end user assembles the shoe making the manufacturing process much less labor intensive. Choose your favorite colors and styles to make your unique shoe!


Images from a paper by Noorduin et al. on the emergence of self-assembling, complex mineral nanostructures from solution by manipulation of conditions in the solution such as temperature, pH, and CO 2 concentrations. The design and control of complex nano- or microstructures has practical ramifications in fields such as optics, catalysis, and electronics. 

Waverly: What did Nedley get us as the wedding gift? That looks huge

Nicole: [unwraps the package] um… it’s a huge-ass self-assembly cat tree system… if I didn’t know any better, I would think CJ is the one getting married

Waverly: Hey, there is also an envelope, maybe he saves something good for us?

Nicole: [opens the card and a few pet grooming vouchers slip out] “That sloppy cat of yours probably needs some exercise and grooming. Randy Nedley”, not even a “Congratulation on your wedding”?

Waverly: [chuckles] If I didn’t know any better, I would think he loves CJ more than he loves his best deputy

Nicole: [groans]

Waverly: hey, at least he approved your three-week leave for our honey moon trip

Nicole: [shakes her head] Baby, who do you think will take care of CJ when we are out of Purgatory?

I’m super happy and proud to share this fun collaboration I did with the lovely Maja from @playinchoc I’ve illustrated 18 endangered animals which are turned into self assembly toys. On top of that you can get a yummy organic chocolate 🤓 go check it out ❤️


Mutually tangled colloidal knots and induced defect loops in nematic fields 

Colloidal dispersions in liquid crystals can serve as asoft-matter toolkit for the self-assembly of composite materials with pre-engineered properties and structures that are highly dependent on particle-induced topological defects1, 2, 3. Here, we demonstrate that bulk and surface defects in nematic fluids can be patterned by tuning the topology of colloidal particles dispersed in them. In particular, by taking advantage of two-photon photopolymerization techniques to make knot-shaped microparticles, we show that the interplay of the topologies of the knotted particles, the nematic field and the induced defects leads to knotted, linked and other topologically non-trivial field configurations 

more on nature

Stand up against the Spanish state’s shocking violence and repression against the movement for self-determination in Catalonia, stand in solidarity with the people of Catalonia. 

In support of self-determination, to peaceful assembly, and to self-defence of the people of Catalonia, all like-minded people need to condemn the suppression of democratic rights and hold the Spanish state to account.

Els carrers seran sempre nostres! Fora les forces d'ocupació!!

There is a gathering at 18:00 at the Spire in Dublin to stand in Solidarity with Catalonia

trous·seau, n. [French, from Old French, diminutive of trousse, bundle. See truss.]

Traditionally, a young lady and her mother would gather various items in preparation for her future married life. The collection would be stored in a beautiful chest or luggage which went with the bride on the day she was wed.

Back in those days, things cost a lot more than they do today in proportion of what people earned. For example, a bedspread may have only cost a mere $35 then, but average income per month at that time was about $150!

People were married much younger in those days as well, making it far more difficult to begin a home. Therefore, loving mothers would prepare an easier transition for their daughters by slowly setting aside items they could spare — a bed sheet set here, some gifted china there. In many instances, a mother would begin collecting and preparing their daughter’s trousseau as early as their first birthday. These collections could contain bridal accessories, jewelry, fine linens, cushions, china, silverware, pillows or quilts, toiletries and bath towels — in addition to the standard clothing and lingerie.

Victorian “Trousseau Tea”

In Victorian times, the bride-to-be would lovingly collect a few sets of new clothes to see herself through her wedding, honeymoon and newlywed days. If she was from a wealthy family, her garments would be sewn by a professional seamstress. Most of the time, however, her mother or she herself would sew them with painstaking care, often adding beautiful touches such as monogramming the bride’s new initials.

There was also a pre-wedding tradition called a “Trousseau Tea” which was a get-together hosted by the bride’s mother usually in her home; with neighbours, colleagues and acquaintances invited to view her daughter’s trousseau. It was a moment for those attended to share in the couple’s/family’s joy as well as awe over the bride’s collection in delight and possibly a bit of envy.

Checklist For Assembling One’s Trousseau

✓ Fine table linens: napkins, place mats, preferably monogrammed.
✓ Fine china: plates, bowls, cups, tea set.
✓ Fine stationary: thank you cards, blank cards, a monogrammed stamp.
✓ Candles, drawer liners, potpourri sachets, decorative elements like soap dish sets, etc..
✓ One classic beautiful bedspread, or set of bed sheets.
✓ A self-assembled book of family recipes.
✓ A couple of childhood keepsakes such as books or toys that meant a lot to you and that you might wish to save for your children, even if it’s only to share a piece of your childhood.
✓ A small box of childhood and family photos: a sweet reminder of the family you grew up in.
✓ Beautiful silk pajamas, lingerie.
✓ Lace, lots of lace for embellishing.

3D Printing

I work for a large industrial and technology conglomerate. The largest, actually. I’m the lead engineer and project manager of a department called “Advanced Additive Manufacturing,” which is just a fancy way of saying “new 3D printing technologies.” The brass at Corporate are positioning our company to be at the apex of the additive manufacturing industry within the decade, so my department is lucky enough to enjoy a budget that’s nearly unlimited; far more than we actually need.

I work under the company’s chief technology officer and report my team’s research progress directly to him. So far our progress has impressed Corporate. This has resulted in a relatively laissez-faire managing of me by the CTO. What I’m doing works for him, and, in turn, works for his bosses.

My small team is pushed hard, but they get rewarded. They know they’re on the bleeding edge of technology that will be a primary causal factor in the next industrial revolution. Of course, the satisfaction that comes with that knowledge is augmented by salaries far beyond what they’d be making at other companies or research firms. Despite pushing them hard, I refuse to let them work more than 10 hours each day. I figure they need to have lives outside of work; their productivity will surely decline the moment they feel their job is oppressive. The only issue with that is it forces me to put in very long hours every so often. Nevertheless, I don’t feel overwhelmed or burned out. My family is on the other side of the country so I don’t see them much anyway and all my friends work with me in other parts of the company. I love my job and I am completely happy doing it.

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"hamilton" characters on a camping trip

Alexander Hamilton: tries to physically roast marshmallows by verbally roasting them; eats a random mushroom and starts hallucinating; tries to lead the group in the C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E-S-O-N-G Song with Laurens but Burr gets annoyed and shuts it down

Aaron Burr: is that one dude who doesn’t put chocolate on his s'mores; brings a self assembling tent that doesn’t work correctly; uses like 3 bottles of mosquito repellent and basically stays in his tent for the whole evening

Eliza Schuyler: used to be a Girl Scout when she was a kid, so shes basically an encyclopedia of camping tips and tricks; tried to warn Alexander about the mushrooms but of course he didn’t listen and now he’s running around singing Nicki Minaj songs

Angelica Schuyler: prepares all the food items for the night; can arrange the perfect s'more with perfectly proportioned ingredients; the mosquitos don’t even go near her, like, she’s so flawless that she doesn’t even need to use bug spray; makes bacon and eggs for breakfast in the morning

Peggy Schuyler: thinks moths are gross af; gets a little whiny because there’s no wifi; has an Anna and Elsa sleeping bag

George Washington: the one hardcore camping extraordinaire dad, complete with hiking boots and crew socks and floppy tan hat; brings a giant backpack filled with camping supplies for like a week; claims to know exactly where he’s going but then realizes he’s been holding the map upside down

Thomas Jefferson: tells the really spooky campfire ghost stories; instead of roasting the normal hot dogs everyone else is having he brings his own applewood smoked bratwurst sausage from Monticello; pokes around at the campfire with his pimp cane

James Madison: gets really scared when Thomas tells his ghost stories but tries not to show it; goes to sleep first but doesn’t actually sleep because he secretly believes that the woods are haunted and that Bigfoot is out to get him

John Laurens: ultimate weenie chef; the only one around the campfire that’s down to sing “kum-ba-yah”; stays up until like 1:30 making shadow puppets with Alexander inside his tent

Marquis de Lafayette: likes his marshmallows cooked until they’re on fire and completely burnt; wanders away from the group and comes back riding on a grizzly bear that he’s tamed at 3 o clock in the morning

Hercules Mulligan: literally bear grylls; leaves the campsite so he can prove to the rest of the group that he can survive the elements; comes back in the morning without pants and holding a raw fish

Phillip Hamilton: runs around catching fireflies and then showing them off to Eliza; decides to climb a tree but gets stuck up there and someone has to help him get down

King George III: brings a fuckin giant RV with air conditioning and a refrigerator; parks it like 5 minutes away from his house

Samuel Seabear-y: plays the clarinet badly; waves his flashlight back and forth really fast; stomps on the ground; eats cubed cheese; wears a sombrero in a goofy fashion; wears clown shoes; wears a hoop skirt; SCREECHES LIKE A CHIMPANZEE