self loathe

anonymous asked:

hey... you reblogged one post with a tag 'i hate myself no matter what' and im just here to say that youre an amazing and beautiful person and remember to always love yourself! i know thats a hard thing to do and it takes a long time but please try!!

hahahahaha the joke’s on you because i have self-esteem issues and an ongoing history of mental illness! :)))

but i appreciate the thought anon. honestly, i didn’t even expect anyone to read the tags, much less bother to message me about it. so, yeah. thank you. it feels nice to know that there are people like you here being considerate

One of the most frustrating things about restructuring how you look at women is shedding the idea that your own value is dependent on your appearance. Like on most levels I know what I look like doesn’t matter and that really I don’t even want my appearance to be acknowledged because it is the least interesting part of me. But I feel like so much of growing up female is being told that the best thing that can happen in life is having people fall in love with you and that will only happen if you’re beautiful. And I feel like there is always going to be part of me obsessing over not being attractive because I’ve been made to feel like that is what I’m useful for but I’m not and I can’t change it. And I know that’s irrational and against so much of what I stand for, but there’s no getting rid of it.

The mind of a writer can be a truly terrifying thing. Isolated, neurotic, caffeine addled, crippled by procrastination, consumed by feelings of panic, self-loathing and soul-crushing inadequacy… and that’s on a good day.
—  Robert De Niro