12 Steps For Self Care
  1. If it feels wrong, don’t do it
  2. Say exactly what you mean
  3. Don’t be a people pleaser
  4. Trust your instincts 
  5. Never speak bad about yourself
  6. Never give up on your dreams
  7. Don’t be afraid to say “no”
  8. Don’t be afraid to say “yes”
  9. Be KIND to yourself
  10. Let go of what you can’t control
  11. Stay away from drama & negativity
  12. LOVE
Active ways to cultivate positive body image:

(Because oh my god, it’s so hard, and everyone’s all like stop feeling so bad about yourself and it’s like how???) 

  • Be naked. A lot. Sleep naked. Have sex naked. Eat cereal naked. (Or naked and wrapped in a sheet. Favorite thing.) 
  • Follow beautiful, confident, (un-photoshopped) body-positive babes on the Internet. Unfollow anything that makes you feel insecure. Exposure is key. You’re not going to get it if you don’t seek it out, because the media sucks and wants us to feel like shit about ourselves so they can take our money. (Some hashtags to follow: #effyourbeautystandards #bootyrevolution #blackisbeautiful #transisbeautiful #wheelchairlife #fatkini #fatshion)
  • Lingerie. Next best thing to being naked. 
  • Self care, babe. Different for everyone. (Me? Showers, books, shaving my legs, nature walks, dark lipstick, good playlists, clean rooms, candles, sexy time.) 
  • Get ready in your underwear. Boobs = happiness. 
  • Self portraits. Be pro-selfie. Take a million selfies. Take sexy selfies. Take no makeup selfies. Take bad angle silly selfies. Take artsy tripod selfies. Take everything-is-on-point selfies. You’re gorgeous; document your gorgeousness. You don’t even need to post them. 
  • Stop with the self deprecationnnnn. Pleeeeaseeee. It’s hard to control your thoughts love, I know, but you can control what you say. NEVER insult yourself out loud. Dare I say compliment yourself out loud? (And if you can, do your best to try to body-positive-ify your thoughts too.) 
  • Sex (including solo sexy time), wine, and chocolate. In that order. 
  • Share the body love. Compliment your girlfriends. Cultivate a nonjudgemental, supportive, lift-each-other-up “we’re so cute” friend group. Everyone’s insecure. Compliment your besties. And strangers, too. Be that person that makes everyone feel good about themselves when they’re around. 

Good luck gorgeous. It’s a battle. We gotta unlearn all this societal bullshit.

i really REALLY wish the body positive movement had been “you don’t have to look good or be beautiful or pretty to be worth something and to make things happen for yourself and to be happy” rather than “everyone is beautiful!! don’t worry you’re still hot even if you’re not ‘conventionally attractive!!” bc that still puts this superficial idea of ‘hotness’ and ‘beauty’ on a pedestal when really it shouldn’t matter at all it’s literally just our outer meat sack it means nothing it’s going to rot anyway

Fall in love with yourself more and more with each passing day. Have so much respect for yourself that you automatically reject anyone that doesn’t.
—  Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin
Even the smallest spark of positivity can spread like wild fire to everyone else you come across. It’s amazing what impact even the smallest acts of kindness can have on the quality of someone else’s day.
—  Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin

Just because you don’t look like somebody who you think is attractive doesn’t mean you aren’t attractive. Flowers are pretty, but so are sunsets and they look nothing alike.

it’s such a strange thing that we care about what we look like. like have you ever just considered that cavemen didn’t have mirrors or cameras or anything to see themselves up close with and they didn’t even care about what they looked like? we literally come from the universe, all of us, and we have most of the same basic parts/appearance but otherwise we look different. our skin and eye colours change based on where we live to protect us from harm and ours cells join together different to give us our other differences in appearance. we’re just built the way we are to survive as every other animal is. when did we go from recognizing our bodies for their health and grace and strength and resiliency to picking them apart and criticizing them and starving ourselves to eliminate parts of them and comparing them to others? when money became the vital part of owning anything and therefore critiquing bodies and selling products to combat these new flaws was a new marketing technique to make tons of it. they made something so unimportant a crucial part of life and i think it’s pure bullshit. don’t even just love your body but realize that its appearance is actually such a stupid thing to waste your energy caring about.

Control your thoughts, and you will be able to control the way in which the world appears.
Think highly of events; if it’s good, see it’s beauty. If it’s bad, seek for growth. Everything that happens has a reason, purpose, and difference that it will make. So take a moment, and choose to see the impact that your thoughts have on your life.
—  Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin

I know this can seem the simplest cure, but it often causes more harm than good. there was a reason you left, there was a reason they left. you will become stronger, I promise.