self builds

THE MOON SIGNS AND THE EARLY ENVIRONMENT

The Moon indicates our emotional style. But equally important, it indicates how we experienced our mother and our early environment and how that affected us psychologically. Our early environment and the type and degree of nurturing we received are critical in shaping our psychology and establishing a sense of security and trust. In this culture and in most others, the father teaches the ways of the world and how to function in it. The mother’s role, on the other hand, is to build the foundation of security, trust, and love necessary for healthy feelings about others and ourselves. If this foundation is cracked or insufficient, we will not have the emotional resources to face our task as an adult of providing for our own survival and that of others.

Our family and our early environment are selected by the soul before life and can, therefore, be read in the chart. The Moon and its aspects, the ruler of the fourth house and its aspects, and the planets in the fourth house and their aspects describe our early environment. They also describe the mother and her attention to us. More accurately, they describe our experience of her and our early environment. Although these aspects describe both the early environment and the mother, the planets within the fourth house seem to describe the environment more than they do the mother. And the houses of the fourth house ruler and the Moon describe the mother’s interests and where she puts her energy. If we have been more influenced in our early years by our father or another caretaker, the Moon and the fourth house will describe that individual.

Moon in Aries

The early environment of this Moon sign is likely to be colored by competition and conflict. The conflict may be between the parents, the siblings, or any combination of family members. This Moon sign also may signify animosity or anger on the part of the mother toward her family or spouse or in general. In any case, the home environment is often tense and competitive, and the individual who grows up in it may be tense and angry as well. On a more positive note, the mother may be strong, independent, assertive, and possibly athletic and encourages these traits in her child. Some with this Moon sign have families who are involved in the military or athletics. In general, the environment is more masculine and encourages the development of masculine traits even in its female children.

Moon in Taurus

Unless the Moon is afflicted, the Taurus Moon’s early environment is likely to be peaceful and stable and meet the child’s physical needs. The home is likely to be comfortable. The family may even be well-off financially. The mother is often affectionate, dependable, and a good cook. However, little attention may be given to emotional and intellectual needs. With this Moon sign, security and material comforts often supersede emotional needs. Consequently, many with this Moon sign repress or are unaware of their feelings. Children in such families often follow the model presented them by finding comfort and satisfaction in material things rather than in people. Love becomes equated with food and gifts. As a result, their relationships may be with toys, food, or television.

Moon in Gemini

Gemini Moons are likely to be bright and intellectually inclined, and the mother fosters this. The mother usually plays an educative role and happily meets the child’s intellectual needs. This is a home where education is valued and reading and schoolwork are emphasized. However, the child’s emotional and physical needs may not be attended to as enthusiastically. Although the mother may be an intellectual role model, she may be less helpful in modeling other skills, such as intimacy and managing in the world. She may not be very affectionate or emotionally demonstrative. In some cases, the mother feels more like a friend, a peer, or an aunt.

Moon in Cancer

This Moon sign is ideal for establishing a solid foundation for adulthood. Unless the Moon is afflicted, the mother probably enjoyed being mother and homemaker. She is likely to have met the child’s physical and emotional needs. When our physical needs are met, we feel valued and recognized; when our emotional needs are met, we learn to value and trust our feelings. Feelings are important because they point to our needs, and only by having our needs met can we grow physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. So, recognition of our feelings is crucial in our early years. It is how self-worth is built and tantamount to being validated as an individual. The Cancer Moon’s mother is someone who attends to her child’s feelings and makes herself available physically and emotionally, which supports the development of self-esteem. On the other hand, the ties with the mother can be too close. The mother is identified with her children and may be possessive, smothering, and overly protective. This may make it difficult for the child to grow up and establish an independent identity.

Moon in Leo

When it is not afflicted, the gift of this Moon sign is a firm sense of self and self-worth. Confidence can go a long way in life. This gift of confidence instilled by the mother establishes a foundation for the Leo Moon’s future successes. The mother’s warm, expressive nurturing style lends confidence to her child. She is likely to have showered her Leo Moon child with attention and affection, so the child comes to expect this from others. This may, in part, be a self-promoting act in that she views her child as an extension of her own ego and love flows from this place of pride. Her child can do no wrong because it is her child. She is likely to encourage her child’s creativity and self-expression and may be creative herself. She is dramatic, forceful, and a show-stealer. The child learns to get her attention by doing the same.

Moon in Virgo

The early nurturing that Virgo Moons receive may be dedicated but dry. The mother is likely to be efficient, orderly, hardworking, and responsible but emotionally inexpressive. She is educated and thorough in her approach to motherhood, studying all the latest manuals about raising children. This care and attention is noticed by the child and makes up in many ways for the mother’s lack of warmth and playfulness. Nevertheless, Virgo Moons may struggle with expressing their emotions, having not had a model for this. Although they may not learn to be emotionally expressive, the dedicated care given to them is often sufficient to build their self-esteem. They, in turn, make dedicated and efficient mothers. On the other hand, the child’s self-esteem might be undermined if the mother is hypercritical and fussy, as is often the case with this Moon sign. In that case, the individual is likely to become self-critical or critical of others too.

Moon in Libra

When not afflicted, this Moon sign represents a beneficial home environment. The early home life is likely to be harmonious and peaceful, and the mother takes pride in providing a home that is both aesthetically pleasing and emotionally supportive. The absence of conflict and argument in the home is often apparent with Libra Moons, for they mirror this non-confrontational style in their relationships. They are likely to have learned how to negotiate and compromise in this early atmosphere, which can later serve them well in their own family relationships and work. The mother might be artistically inclined, refined, and well-versed in social etiquette. Culture and the arts might be emphasized in the home.

Moon in Scorpio

The early environment of Scorpio Moons is often difficult and intensely emotional. Abuse or misuse of power and authority are a possibility, leaving the individual angry or repressed. The mother or another family member may be domineering, manipulative, possessive, or controlling. There is often an undercurrent of hostility and resentment in the home and a sense of deep, dark secrets that no one is allowed to speak about. The secrets could include such things as violence, sexual abuse, addiction, criminality, psychological problems, or illegitimate children. On the other hand, the mother may have been highly attentive to the child’s emotional needs and bonded deeply with him or her. This is fine for the infant, who needs this bonding, but as the child matures, this can feel overbearing and possessive. Since identification by both parent and child is so strong, Scorpio Moons often have difficulty breaking the tie with their mothers as adults. The emotional intensity of this relationship often continues over the years. This deep psychic connection between the mother and child may, in fact, originate in a former lifetime.

Moon in Sagittarius

This Moon sign often represents a less traditional nurturing experience. The mother’s nurturing style is easygoing and liberal. Freedom is important to her and this attitude is conveyed to the child by allowing him or her freedom to explore, ask questions, and investigate life. However, there may be too little responsibility expected from the child and too few rules to allow the child to develop the inner discipline necessary for adulthood. Or, the mother may be off having her own adventure. So, although the mother may be a model of independent action and adventure, she may not be available to provide the security and stability that a child needs. She might lack responsibility and behave more like a friend than a parent. It is common for those with this Moon sign to live in a foreign country or be influenced by foreigners when they are growing up, perhaps by traveling a lot. The military family is an example of this. The family values freedom more than they do stability. They often move or travel a lot.

Moon in Capricorn

With this Moon sign, something may be lacking in the early environment. The mother may be ill and unable to care for the child, absent from the child’s life, depressed, repressed emotionally, over- worked, or unable to cope with the duties of motherhood. Sometimes the mother dies. Harshness is another possibility. The mother may be unloving, overbearing, strict, rigid, and restrictive, allowing little leeway for the child to act like a child or express his or her emotions. In any case, the child receives insufficient mothering. On the other hand, the early home life may be stable, secure, orderly, and attentive to responsibilities, supplying the child with the structure and discipline needed to function effectively in the world as an adult.

Moon in Aquarius

The Aquarius Moon’s early home life and mother are likely to be unique or unusual in some way. The individual may grow up in a household with progressive ideas about child rearing and considerably more freedom than most children. This free and tolerant atmosphere exposes the child to ideas that other children might not encounter. However, although this is an advantage intellectually, the child may have difficulty getting his or her need for closeness met. Aquarius, although tolerant and altruistic, is not known for its emotional warmth. Young children, however, do need close emotional interactions with adults to form a solid foundation of trust and a sturdy sense of self. As a result, Aquarius Moons may learn at an early age not to expect others to meet their emotional needs. Consequently, as adults, they may have trouble addressing the emotional needs of others. When afflicted, this Moon sign may indicate a chaotic home, inconsistent nurturing, divorce, or a disrupted home life, which can leave emotional scars and affect the individual’s ability to form intimate relationships later on. Several moves or changes in the early years are common. These can either cause insecurity or teach the individual to make the best of change.

Moon in Pisces

Pisces Moons may undergo some loss or hardship in relation to the mother. She may be psychologically incapable of caring for her child, mentally ill, addicted to drugs or alcohol, or neglectful. On the other hand, she may be artistic or musical. She is often religious, kind, and selfless. Religious or spiritual activities may be carried out in the home. In either case, Pisces Moons learn compassion, either through their own suffering or their mother’s compassionate care. When they are cared for lovingly, they learn to care lovingly for others. If they have been neglected, however, they may grow up with the same psychological damage as their mother and be prone to drug abuse and mental illness.

Insomnia-Be-Gone!

A soothing sachet to tuck under your pillow or hang over your bed. Get a good night’s sleep and wake up refreshed!

INGREDIENTS

Pick and choose some of the following herbs. I typically use a mixture of about 4, or whichever I happen to have on hand at the time. I try to avoid too many at once because that results in an overwhelming scent.

Anise - Known to repel nightmares.

Calendula – Brings about a good night’s sleep.

Cedar – Calms the mind and wards off bad dreams.

Chamomile – One of the most powerful sleep herbs on the list.

Jasmine – Gives good dreams, but can cause erotic dreams in women.

Lavender – The ultimate in stress relief herbs.

Lemon Balm – Stress relieving sleep aid.

Mugwort – Helps ward off bad dreams.

Mullein – Can be used to protect against bad dreams or psychic attack.

Rose petals – Brings about dreams of love. Can also cause erotic dreams if used too heavily.

Next, gather the following stones.

Clear Quartz — Who doesn’t love clear quartz? It’s like an energy booster for your other stones.

Amethyst — This gem helps guard against nightmares, but also helps soothe an overactive mind and wipes away the stress of the day (or week).

Rose Quartz — Bring in some of rose quartz’ love and peace. This brings deep, restorative sleep and over time can build self-love and overall happiness.

Lepidolite — Probably my most recommended stone. Lepidolite is like kryptonite to even the most super-est of stresses and depressions. It can stop obsessive thoughts, bring mood swings into line, and will upend dependency and mental anguish that might be keeping you up at night.

DIRECTIONS

Take the stones (little chips are just as good as big chunks) and place them in a bowl. Add any essential oils (many of the floral herbs are more fragrant in their oil form) and use your hands to roll the stones around until coated.  While doing so, focus your intent as soft pink or yellow (or whatever color is soothing to you) light radiating from your hands.

Next, add the remaining herbs. Continue to hand mix the ingredients while focusing your intent. Once thoroughly mixed, hold your hands over the bowl and really expand that “light” into a ball of positive, soothing energy.

If you’d like, say a quick invocation or spell. Something like:

When I lay me down to sleep

I ask of you my dreams to keep.

No more tossing, no more turning.

No more stress and questions burning.

Only rest and gentle sleep,

Until the morning’s dawn shall peep.

You can change the words to fit your needs, or skip it altogether. It doesn’t have to rhyme - that’s just a simple device some people use. Hell, it doesn’t even need to make sense, as long as it is you channelling your will into the mixture.

DO. NOT. RUSH. THIS. PART. Breathe. Let your will do its work.

Once you’ve imbued the mixture with your will, transfer it to a muslin bag or pouch. Hang near your bed or tuck under your pillow. 


As a side-note, always feel free to experiment with this and any of my other recipes. This is what works for me. Maybe you find catnip or vervain soothing. Add it!  Maybe tourmaline is your power crystal. Add it!  And if you experiment with the recipe and find something that seems to work really well, let me know! 

Best wishes, 

The Hedge Wytch

If you don’t take the time to invest in yourself, then no one else will either. You, and only you, are in charge of setting the foundations in which your self development builds upon.
—  Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin
How to Tune into Your Needs

If you grew up emotionally neglected or abused, you may have developed the belief that your needs are not important and that you are selfish for having them. You may even automatically put others before yourself without thinking, as it has been so engrained in you. Here are some tips for how to tune into yourself, and begin putting your needs first:

1. Use your feelings as your guide. If you’re feeling angry, sad, frustrated, etc, ask yourself, “Why am I feeling this way?” You may not even be sure of what you’re feeling… maybe you can only pick up on feeling something “bad” or “uncomfortable.” Explore it. Find the roots. Honor your feelings. Because our feelings are indicators of our values and boundaries, and when they are being violated.

2. Recognize your self-doubt, if you have it. Many victims of abuse or neglect have become wired to believe they are “bad” or at fault for anything unpleasant or hurtful that happens. Doubt can become the fog between you and your needs. Using mindfulness, separate your self-doubt from who you are. You are not your self-doubt. You are worthy. You are good. You are enough. These are truths, but you have been brainwashed to believe otherwise.

3. Take time to build self-awareness into yourself and why you struggle with meeting your needs. Usually it is because of your childhood and how your parents raised you that have caused you to become that way–Mom called you selfish and shamed you. Dad neglected or left you. Explore your story, and give voice to the feelings that come up.

4. Make a practice into telling yourself frequently, “My needs are important,” and “I will honor my needs.” Everyone has needs. Everyone. While everyone else is advocating for theirs, it is up to you to advocate for yours. Repetition and practice will re-wire your brain from “My needs aren’t important” to “My needs ARE important and deserve to be heard.”

5. Practice tuning into yourself throughout the day. Ask yourself, how am I feeling right now? What do I need? Be patient with yourself, especially in the beginning. It may be difficult hearing yourself initially, but the more you tune in, the more you’ll be able to recognize your inner voice.

6. Make sure to have support! At times dealing with the feelings that come up may be overwhelming–like a beginner starting out on a 10-mile run. But take one step at a time. Having the support of a therapist or loved one will help you through the process. Remind yourself that you’re building a new skill from scratch. You can do it!

[ may 17, wednesday ]

🌿decided to put a motivation spread in my art journal so whenever i’m not feeling good about myself i can just pick a note out of these pockets and read something like “it’s okay! we all have our off days.” or “stay focused, girl!”

🌿i just think it’s a great way to build self-esteem and confidence and that it’s never wrong to be proud of yourself.

Ways to Self-Soothe

In addition to the traditional ways to self-soothe, such as taking a bath, reading a book, aromatherapy, and etc, here are some other tips to build your self-soothing skills:

1. Create a calm, loving voice inside of you that is unconditionally accepting. It may help to think of a best friend, a co-worker, your therapist, or even someone you met in passing. Imagine their energy and presence, take it into yourself, and think of what they would say about the situation.

2. Physically hug, rub, or wrap yourself with something comfortable (i.e., a soft blanket).

3. Tell yourself, over and over, “You’re going to be okay,” “You’ve been through worse and survived. You’re living proof you’ll get through this,” or “This too shall pass.” 

4. In response to criticism, you can tell yourself, “It’s okay to not be perfect,” “I am good just the way I am,” or “We are all imperfect, and so am I.”

5. Once you feel a little more calm, begin asking yourself what it is you need at this moment. Your needs are important, especially in times of distress. It may be that the little voice inside you says you need to go for a walk, or to hug yourself a little longer, or for you to continue saying comforting words. Whatever it is you need, give yourself that. And if you have trouble hearing your needs, continue to soothe or hug yourself in the midst of your emotions.

6. Remind yourself that everything in life is impermanent. No exceptions. So what you’re going through now will eventually shift and change. Allow yourself to go through the emotions, surfing the waves with the board of your self-compassion. And soon you’ll find yourself somewhere new.

Meant to Be - Part One: SOS

All Parts

Pairing: jamilton (Hamilton x Jefferson)

Request: Soulmate AU – When soulmates draw on themselves, it appears on the other’s skin as well.

Tagging: @elenarte @empyrealsakaki

Word Count: 1723

Warnings: swearing, anxiety, mentions of death, bullying

A/N: Whoops I think this is going to turn into a series… enjoy!


The first time Alexander Hamilton had ever spoken to his soulmate, he was seven years old, living on Nevis with his mother. He had written a poem on his wrist, hoping that whoever his perfect match was would read it. His soulmate had written back, That was a terrible poem. But thank you.

They’d talked every day from then on. Alex had learned to love this nameless, faceless person. When Alex was feeling vulnerable or anxious, he would write SOS on his arm, and his soulmate would begin to draw happy little doodles on his arm to cheer him up. It always worked.

Keep reading

A Solid Friend

Aries- CARNELIAN: A cheery orange stone that boosts listlessness! It provides a push of courage to overcome, improving metabolism and energy flow. It powerfully grounds in the moment.

Taurus- TREE AGATE: A stone of quiet support, it helps clear energy blockages.It boosts the immune system and water regulation within the body. Stable love.

Gemini- CRAZY LACE AGATE: It’s called the laughter stone for a reason. It elevates thoughts and the flow of energy. It encourages truth, balancing opposites with ease.

Cancer- WHITE MOONSTONE: Fluidity and nonlinear thinking are the forte of the this stone. It carries the energy of the new moon. It follows the energy cycles of the body, dissolving boundaries that impede the acceptance of love.

Leo- MALACHITE(did I choose this for my sign bc it’s my favorite?? maybe): This is a major protection stone, giving the courage to claim your own life. It embodies change and emotional risk. It can help you stand tall with a power that demands respect, forming friendships out of love and not obligation.

Virgo- SNOWFLAKE OBSIDIAN: This stone is all about purity and awareness of harmful blockages. It provides a center in the midst of chaos.  Grounding and protective, it gently brings awareness to outdated thought patterns.

Libra- LEPIDOLITE: This is one of the best stones for soothing turmoil, as it emanates calm. It helps with transitions, trusting that things will all work out. Good for business. It promotes growth and self-love.  

Scorpio- SMOKY QUARTZ: An emblem of stability, this stone amplifies the pride of being human. It clears fears and filters negativity and unspoken resentment. It assists in letting go.

Sagittarius- AMAZONITE: Named after the legendary woman warriors, this is a stone of truth, the search for oneself, and clear boundaries. It soothes the spirit. Good for luck, it allows one to look at other point of views.

Capricorn- GARNET: All about stabilization, Garnet brings order to chaos. It alleviates security and money fears and builds self-esteem. It promotes regeneration and decalcification.

Aquarius- LABRADORITE: A stone of magic, promoting a mystical view that can bring change. It can spark unexplained excitement. It strengthens the energy field and the communication of abstract concepts.

Pisces- PREHNITE: This is a stone of surrender. It is said to connect with divinity and ground those who are usually drifty. Prehnite assists in living fearlessly from the heart, connecting with one’s willpower.


–I also recommend looking at parts of your chart you have particular difficulty with… for instance, if you have Saturn in Aries, look into Carnelian for more self-assertion.–

“And kid, you’ve got to love yourself. You’ve got wake up at four in the morning, brew black coffee, and stare at the birds drowning in the darkness of the dawn. You’ve got to sit next to the man at the train station who’s reading your favorite book and start a conversation. You’ve got to come home after a bad day and burn your skin from a shower. Then you’ve got to wash all your sheets until they smell of lemon detergent you bought for four dollars at the local grocery store. You’ve got to stop taking everything so goddam personally. You are not the moon kissing the black sky. You’ve got to compliment someones crooked brows at an art fair and tell them that their eyes remind you of green swimming pools in mid July. You’ve got to stop letting yourself get upset about things that won’t matter in two years. Sleep in on Saturday mornings and wake yourself up early on Sunday. You’ve got to stop worrying about what you’re going to tell her when she finds out. You’ve got to stop over thinking why he stopped caring about you over six months ago. You’ve got to stop asking everyone for their opinions. Fuck it. Love yourself, kiddo. You’ve got to love yourself.”
—Unknown

Cannot believe I’m posting this blob of embarrassment but chubby Sarah meet less chubby Sarah 😂 the first photo was taken back in January , after 2 kids and one too many tacos 🌮 I’ve lost around 19 pounds since then which may not seem like a lot in 4 months but I’m also gaining muscle by strength training every week. I still have over 30lbs to go before I hit my goal but remember, scales are NOT the best representation of your weight loss journey, the proof is in the photo👍🏻