13th of Second Seed

There has been an… Interesting development.

Vilkas has caught my illness. I am fine now but Vilkas is lying in his bed, muttering about something.

I don’t think he’ll remember it, but we made amends; apologized for the names and general hostility.

“You’re– you know, you’re not that bad.. for a thief.”

“Thank you, Vilkas.”

“…You’re supposed to return the sentiment.”


“Yes!” His frail voice raised an octave. “You’re such an honorable, handsome Nord.”

“Go back to sleep Vilkas.”

I’m pretty sure he’s also delusional.


At least Gerdur, Ralof’s sister, knows how to lay off the propaganda. In exchange for using her house she’s asked if I could go to Whiterun and ask the Yarl Jarl to station some extra soldiers here. While I hate to visit another city… she has a point. This is a small village, with no walls, small force. If a dragon were to attack, they would stand no chance.

I’m not going to stay at her house, though. I don’t trust myself around Ralof and anything sharp.


“First you take me out of Markarth and now you help me join the companions?”

“You’re not… angry?”

“I never really liked Markarth, it’s one of the reasons I was a sellsword.”

“I…” I’m confused.

“Here,” He hands me a sheathed Dawnbreaker, “you don’t need to apologize. I’d like to keep the armor though. If you don’t mind.”

I shook my head, “It will do you more good then it ever could me.” Which made him smile.

“Well, don’t get into too much trouble without me. I know how you are.”

I snorted, “See you around.”

It would have been nice to know back in the Reach but I’m not going to complain.

8th of Second Seed

I guess The Companions mope by killing things. I woke up to Vilkas kicking my headboard and saying something about ‘time to kill your dragon.’

Fortunately, he’s staying away from the information that was dumped on us yesterday but he wants to ask questions, it’s written all over his face.

By the Gods I am never traveling with this man again.

Loredas, 15th of Last Seed

After a group of bandits, some walking dead, and a giant spider I found Lucan’s stupid claw. But there was still more cave to explore and I didn’t really want to go past that spider corpse again, so I kept going.

If I had known it would lead to a wall that glowed when I got close and a corpse that nearly cut me in half, I would have braved the dead spider. Now, I have the word “Force” floating around my head and cut across my ribs that will probably scar.

Fuck Lucan and his claw. I wonder how he’d react if I just dropped it in a river somewhere.

11th of Second Seed

For the past two days I’ve been lying in a bed sleeping, coughing, and apparently puking. Vilkas (who’s still here for goddess knows what reason) tells me I caught a nasty bug and haven’t been able to keep anything down.

Every chance he gets he somehow slips in how I threw up on his boots.

Regarding the vomit in Vilkas’s shoes… I need to think about what I’m going to tell the Guild.


I swear by every bloody Divine, if I hear one more Nord say he wants some ‘variety’ and then give me this smile, I will become extremely violent.

I punched that disgusting man out of his chair. Vilkas came into the room to see me holding onto the wall, giggling at the look on the floor-man’s face.

Because you know who else I won’t have sex with?

  1. Him.

Vilkas won’t stop chuckling into his food and I can feel the eyes boring into my back.

…He’ll stop laughing when I tell him I want to sleep in his room tonight.



After moving through this cave we came upon a door which was obviously wrought with traps that I wanted to disarm. My fumbling fingers did something wrong and the door slid upwards instead.

I was then greeted with the largest Sabercat I have ever seen with a coat I did not recognize. When it lunged I stopped breathing. But it triggered all of the traps set near the door and landed at my feet, dead.

I think I nearly shat myself.


After a walk the Blackreach-looking cave (filled with large green-stripped deer and even larger Sabercats) ended in a shrine, of all things.

A shrine to Auriel. Which means we’re on the right track.

But the person tending the shrines is… a Snow Elf? If this place didn’t remind me of Blackreach I would have liked to stay and speak with him. He seems lonely, anyway.

However, we need to embark on a pilgrimage so we can get into the place that holds Auriel’s Bow and… Gelebor’s brother. Who he wants us to kill.

“The shrines will be tended by the priests, they will open the way for you.”

“So, will they be able to help us find the other shrines?”

“I am afraid not. Their ghosts still believe that this is an active pilgrimage. they will treat you as they would treat any other pilgrim.”

“Well,” Serana turned towards me. “At least I can’t freeze to death. That portal looks like it goes somewhere cold.”

“I’m afraid those will not be the only dangers you face. There will be those of the Betrayed in the Vale.”

So far as he knows, he and his brother are the only snow elves left living on Tamriel so–


18th of First Seed

I guess my brother can become friends with anyone.

“Oh, wow you brought a dog. I would have preferred the horses.”

“Shut up. Let’s get this over with.”

“At least I’m alive.” Felix said as he walked past both of us, into the cave.

“Oh I see how it is.”

“Yeah, It’s easier to come up with insults for Vampires then Werewolves.”

“Like how you’re all savages?”

“Would you two shut up? If a cave full of–”

“There’s no one here.” They say it together and I already hate this trip.

This cave is nestled in the Jerall Mountain range and I could just go over t– and remarkably warm… and empty. I got a look when I said I wanted to soak in the spring here before reading something that could make me insane.

I won and now I won’t die with blood in my hair.

These trees also smell really good.


“Unless I’m seeing things, you’re glowing.”

“I think that means it’s working.”

I really don’t want to read these scrolls.

Middas, 28th of Frostfire


You know, I just found out my brother is a werewolf and subsequently beat him up for it. I left the mead hall without saying goodbye to anyone and lost my horse to cliff.

I thought ganking some vampires would take my mind off how much I hate Skyrim distract me. It was kind of out of the way but I went to check out that cave Isran mentioned.

Do you know what I found?

A person. A vampire.

In a box.

Do you know who does that?

Crazy people.

Or, I guess, vampires.

“So… you want me to take you to your home?”

She nodded.

“Which is going to be, let me guess, full of vampires.”

Hesitantly, she nods again.

“With an Elder Scroll.”

“What part of that isn’t clear?”

“The part where I should care.” I hold up my hands, “You know what? Whatever, you’re on your own.”

Well, she’s still with me. Tailing Gulum-Ei is something I should do alone, but she’s insisting on coming along.

This just keeps getting better.

29th of First Seed

I dropped my bow in a river.

But it was fine, since I fell in shortly after and washed up with it.

This means that not only are we back near where we started, we’re held up again until I stop sneezing and everything stops aching.

But, the fire behind me and the way my body feels right now remind me far too much of coming out of Irkngthand.


I am never, never going to get used to the way the sun just comes above the horizion and then falls right back under during the winter.

It’s a good thing Felix is, becuase otherwise I would have no idea what day it is.

I also found a giant Amethyst. The only good thing that’s come out of this trip so far.

11th of First Seed

So, the Moth Priest is blind.

Which means I’m supposed to read the remaining scrolls, I don’t understand why.

I don’t want to go blind, or go insane, or die.


“You know, I’ve told you a lot about my family, but I don’t know anything about yours…”

“I’m not going to talk about my family. You’ve met my only family.”

There’s an awkward silence before Serana speaks again. “Then where do you come from? Tell me about that.”

“Are you sure? We could be here all night.”

I hear her laugh. “I don’t mind.”

I told Serana about the seaside, the docks, the yellow grass and how we could sleep outside to watch the stars and the sunrise without any blankets.

I told her about Crow and Bear and the twin footpads, and how the guild back home was so different from the one here.

To her credit she listened the whole time.

I haven’t spoken about home at all, or thought about it really.  I guess it’s just easier not to.

The next day

The Greybeards want me to get a horn from one of the nordic ruins much further north. While I loathe to head back into the snow so soon, I feel like I owe the Greybeards, and getting an ancient relic is the least I can do.

“Remember Dragonborn, go down the mountain slowly and take breaks when you feel winded. Otherwise you’ll just become ill again.”

“Thank you, Arngeir. I appreciate all of your help. And again, I apologize for taking so long to come.”

“It is enough that you came at all Dragonborn.”

I’m not getting the headaches associated with words and shouts anymore, I’m told I was “thinking about it wrong.”

Some pisshole in the mountains

Mercer is dead, so long as he can actually be killed by a sword through the chest. Though, I don’t remember exactly how I got out of Irkngthand, the last thing I remember are the pipes bursting and a lot of blood. Considering, the next thing I remember is Brynjolf, I’m going to take a wild guess that it was him.

But I left nearly as soon as I woke, and only had time to grab my bag before my… companions started stirring.

Which was fine because I don’t want the armor, but I didn’t have anything else. I had stashed the rest of my gear at the Nightgate inn so I was running through the snow mostly naked.

Once I got here and searched through my bag I found one of the Eyes of the Falmer… I don’t know why they gave it to me. Maybe to try and coax me into that position. Or back to the cistern, I don’t know of anyone who could/would buy this thing.

But it would look pretty in my house. Which is in Riften.

I don’t want to go back to Riften. I know Valen can find me when he gets back.

Sundas, 16th of Sun’s Dusk

Mercer hasn’t even been to Riften. Or at least, no one saw him take everything from the Vault.

It also turns out no one knew where we were going. Mercer told no one, I only hinted at it to Delvin. So imagine my surprise when Rune hugged me, lifting me off my feet saying, “We thought you we’re dead!”

Or when Vekel revealed that Brynjolf had gone looking for us.

After talking about it for awhile we came to the decision to hunt down and kill Mercer. Or rather, Brynjolf finalized it because whether or not he wishes to admit it, he is acting Guildmaster.

So, it’s fallen on me to search Mercer’s house.

“Be careful lass, this is the last place in Skyrim I’d ever want to send you.”

I’m sure his place will be full of tricks and traps and other things that will try to kill me.

But first I need to rummage through my closet and find something that makes less noise when I walk. And perhaps take a nap this ordeal has left me… drained.

Coming into the Cistern and seeing all of them alive? Angry, sure, but they’re alright. It was like releasing a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

13th of Frostfall

I decided to stop in Riften because I’m an idiot partly to get my armor fixed up a little and partly because there’s the distinct possibility I won’t survive this.

When I handed my armor off to Valen I was interrupted by Delvin, saying something about Brynjolf’s feathers and how I needed to go see him.

“You wanted to see me?”

“Aye, Maven Black-Briar has asked for you by name.”

I scoffed, “What does she want?”

Brynjolf paused, “I’d prefer to keep that between you and Maven, you should go see her as soon as possible.”


“You know, lass. It’s my business to kno–”

At that point I had to walk away lest I push him into the cistern’s pool. It turns out he already knows about most of my… situations, anyway.

Of course he does, nosy little bastard.

From what I can tell he had a long chat with Valen before I got back to Riften earlier in the month.

I’m not sure if I’m relieved or angry, because I don’t trust Brynjolf and I always feel angry.

But what bothers me most is that I was never this short-tempered back in Cyrodiil, not to the point of insubordination, and certainly not to the point of nearly drowning someone.

After arriving at the college

Turns out there’s a Thalmor here.

But he’s not interested in me, or anyone like me, or even Talos worshipers. He’s looking for powerful items the college might have, even if he says otherwise. As long as I stay away from him, it’s shouldn’t be a problem.

But I swear to the gods, it’s like the Thalmor can smell half-breeds.