sacredwarrior88  asked:

The incubi and Diana responding to the MC having a fantasy of being hunted and taken like prey?

James: “Miss,” James says slowly in response to your confession. For a moment his eyes flash gold, but it’s gone as he blinks and pulls his glasses from his face. “I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into. I won’t go easy.”

Erik: “My, my…” The tone in Erik’s voice is teasing with just a hint of sultry. He takes a few steps toward you, backing you up into a wall and caging you between his arms. “You’ve got a few kinks, don’t you, Princess?”

Sam: A flush is on his cheeks as he mumbles something. When you ask him to repeat himself, a sudden flash of gold shows itself in Sam’s eyes. “I said you better start running then, because I’m a pretty good hunter.”

Matthew: There’s something possessive in the way Matthew’s hand curls into your hair, cradling the back of your head. “I can do that,” he whispers, lips close to yours like he’s already daring you to kiss him.

Damien: The idea of hunting you down and taking you had never occurred to Damien, but seeing the look in your eyes has him considering it. He just has one question: “Indoors or outdoors?”

Diana: You see the golden spark in her eyes long before she’s actually answering you. When she suddenly has you pinned to the wall, a smirk is on her face. “You’re slow prey, but I’m willing to bet still very good.”

You can't sex your way out of everything

So I’m DMing and my friend is play a Homebrew magic girl tiefling. She loves to seduce people and have sex with them to get what she wants. We’re in a court room were she and the party are accused for treason.
Our Rouge: “can we have time to prove our innocence?
Me: “Hmm I don’t know”
Magic girl(ooc): “I roll to seduce him”
Magic girl: yes I can I roll a natural 20!
Everone started laughing.

Flaming boobs

We were in a kitchen in the middle of a castle trying to persuade the head chef to give us food

Fire Genasi: can you maybe give us food?
Cook: uh. Maybe. What do you have in return
Fire Genasi: …my tits?
Cook: do the nips light on fire?
Fire Genasi: uh. Yeah *turns to dm* can I roll to seduce the cook?
DM: I mean. There’s nothing stopping you
Fire Genasi: *rolls a nat20*
Cook: okay yeah you have free reign over the whole kitchen.

Our party (a half-elf bard, a half-elf ranger, and a human ex-paladin), is exploring its first dungeon in our first campaign. We’re fighting a trio of moving statues (one of whom is very angry because our ex-pally pissed on it earlier) plus their creator. One of the statues tries to punch our bard, who is usually a very sweet, hippie, New Age-y type lady.

DM: Roll to see if you can dodge

Bard: (rolls Nat 20) YES!

DM: …Okay, not only do you dodge, but you judo flip him and he’s going to take damage…


Paladin (who is dating the Bard irl): Can I roll to fall in love with her?

DM: Sure?

Paladin: (rolls 18)

DM: Yeah, you’re fucking head over heels. Nothing else matters. Congratulations. You even get “lovespiration”

Bard: (rolls to see if she loves him back, just for fun) 12…

DM: Yeah, this guy is making weird eyes at you, and you think you might like it, but you’re not sure yet.

We then proceeded to have an arcane mecha fight with the rest of the enemies

The party is staying in an inn for the night, and our dragonborn fighter and human rogue are in the bar, drinking heavily. The human, being half the overall size of the dragonborn, is extremely dunk.

Rogue (to DM and pretty out-of-the-blue): can I seduce the bar stool next to me?

DM: uhhhhhh… excuse me?

R: I seduce the bar stool

DM: uh… roll charisma, I guess

*rogue rolls a nat 20*

DM: the stool agrees to go to your room with you. You drag it up to your room and proceed to fuck it. Let’s not talk about how.