We’ve always been known as Turk and JD. Like, when we were in college, people would be like: when are Turk and JD getting here? And then at med school, everyone was like: when are Turk and JD getting here? The point is, we were together so much this Indian girl only slept with him because she thought his last name was Anjadi.
I suppose I could riff a list of things that I care as little about as our last week together. Lemme see, uh, low-carb diets. Michael Moore. The Republican National Convention. Kabbalah and all Kabbalah-related products. Hi-def TV, the Bush daughters, wireless hot spots, The O.C., the U.N., recycling, getting Punk’d, Danny Gans, the Latin Grammys, the real Grammys. Jeff, that Wiggle who sleeps too darn much, The Yankees payroll, all the red states, all the blue states, every hybrid car, every talk show host, everything on the planet, everything in the solar system, everything everything everything everything everything that exists — past, present and future, in all discovered and undiscovered dimensions. Oh, and Hugh Jackman.