scooby gang

okay so theres an episode of whats new scooby doo where the gang goes home on valentines day, and i guess the studio really wanted to avoid the implication that daphne and fred were sleeping together because daphne and velma live together and fred lives with shaggy and scooby 

but that attempt at avoiding anything risque backfired spectacularly because now it just seems like daphne and velma are a comfortably domestic couple and fred is trying to learn how to live with his boyfriends over excitable and really hungry great dane

Things that are technically “Addams Family” canon whether we like it or not
  • The Family owns Central Park and sometimes lives there
  • We have seen a canon!Female Pugsley
  • Pugsley’s first word was “Help”, after Wednesday threw him down a trapdoor
  • Gomez went to Law School and actually somehow passed and also doesn’t know what the fifth amendment is
  • Morticia was in an arranged marriage to some guy but Lurch accidentally caused his death via toothpick so
  • Lurch has both a mother and a father and at least one of them built him
  • Wednesday was once stalked by a cat
  • At one point the Family had to hold a seance to bring Pugsley back to their plane of existence but stopped halfway through to play Charades with Thing
  • Morticia’s Mother was the Wicked Witch of the West
  • Grandmama had a brother named Jester who liked to play pranks
  • Gomez can be hypnotized by the sound of a bugle
  • Fester somehow had a baby with the Moon
  • Pugsley once wanted a job at the bank so he tunneled into their vaults and started counting money for them
  • The Addams Family have actually met the Scooby Doo Gang; they housekept for them while Gomez and Morticia were on another honeymoon
  • Speaking of which they canonically have had at least 32 honeymoons
  • They also banged during a hurricane definitely more than once
  • Grandmama has a Drug Cart
  • Wednesday taught Lurch how to dance at least twice
  • The Addams Family have an Alligator that has changed genders at least once and though that was probably more of a continuity error than anything I don’t care I love the Genderfluid Alligator
  • Pugsley knows how to drive
  • At one point Gomez was voiced by Scrappy Doo
  • When Pugsley turns “Normal” he becomes an Underwear Intern
  • Wednesday has set fire to the Jehovah’s Witnesses and also a Camp but we all knew about that
  • Grandmama ran a Psychic Hotline
  • There’s a very good chance that Pugsley hatched out of something
  • Wednesday once had a crush on a boy so she tried to guillotine him

EDIT: Since for some reason y’all like this post here’s a version that has sources.

Hear me out: Hogwarts Bughead finding the marauder’s map. Ravenclaw Jughead cracking the way to open it “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good” and sharing it only with Hufflepuff Betty. Imagine them using it to sneak around the castle, into each other’s dorms, into unused classrooms. Imagine them using it to figure out Gryffindor Jason Blossom’s murder and sneaking back into the library after curfew to continue investigating. Imagine them using it to meet at midnight in each other’s common room to talk and have sweet little kisses, to talk about Polly and Jughead’s father and all their worries. Imagine them skipping class together and the teacher never finding out how they do it or where they go. 

Also, imagine the marauder’s taking a liking to them - “Mr. Prongs would like to inform Mr. Jughead Jones that his girlfriend is even prettier than him”  “Mr. Wormtail kindly offers his regards to the Mr. Jones and Miss Cooper in their trouble making” “Mr. Padfoot would like Miss Cooper to know that she is by far the sneakiest Hufflepuff he ever had the pleasure to encounter” “Mr. Moony wishes Mr. Jones the best of luck with his noble pursuit of wooing Miss Cooper”  And Betty and Jughead sitting around laughing to themselves about their map, thinking about who the marauders were, what they looked like, where were they now? 

Or the Marauders giving them their own nicknames: “Mr. Prongs would like to formally inform a Mr. Jones and a Miss Cooper that their new names are now Mr. Beanhead and Miss. Milkshake”   Or Betty and Jughead coming up with their own - Miss Betts and Mr. Juggie. Less creative, but what they call one another. 

I don’t know, I just think the marauders would have adored the new scooby duo.