science-tests

So guys

in this spongebob episode I’m watching, you know the one where Mrs. Puff gets fired because Spongebob fails his test so much and they said spongebob has failed his driving test 1,056,057 times which - if he takes the test EVERY SINGLE DAY, ONCE A DAY - thats 2,893 years. 2893 YEARS. Now, since we also know that spongebob does a lot of other stuff, he doesn’t take the test every single day, so… most likely more than 3000 years he has been trying (and failing) to pass his driving test. dUde

so for all of you who feel like failures, at least it hasn’t taken you 3000+ years to pass a driving test

New Anthology: Nets for snaring the Sun: Speculative Work from Hawaiʻi and the Pacific

Outsiders writing our stories for us is a tired plot of the past.  The visionary plot of our future is writing our own stories. In the last century, the people of this region have too often been the victims of what seems like science fiction plots: nuclear testing without regard for the human consequences, pirating the genetic material of our bodies and natural resources, extracting minerals and profit from the land and undersea, Western concepts of science triumphing over sacredness, abusive colonies of prisoners sent from other places, militarization of our homes, the ocean rising to swallow us. Yet these plots have never overwhelmed our stories. We are strong. We are resilient. We are hopeful.

This desire, to read these stories of the future, has prompted us to invite you to write with us for Nets for Snaring the Sun: Speculative Work from Hawaiʻi and the Pacific, a new anthology seeking submissions in speculative literature. We are calling for pieces located in the Pacific that construct complex characterizations of Pacific cultures and peoples living with imaginative future technologies, steampunk settings, or fantasy narratives to name but a few examples.

This anthology of speculative fiction from and of the Pacific couldn’t come at a better time, because our activism and our movements are no longer exclusive to addressing oppressions of the past; we are now trying to imagine something different than what has been imagined for us. We are no longer talking back to empire; we are trying to imagine beyond it.

Guidelines:

All submissions should be sent as an MS Word document tohehiale@gmail.com by January 31, 2017.

Poetry:

  • maximum 4 pages per poem (However, we are open for query, if you’re interested in submitting a longer piece.)
  • maximum of 4 poems per submission submitted as individual MS Word files
  • submissions must be previously unpublished in English
  • We are accepting translated submissions. We are also open to accepting pieces translated into English with the texts written in the original language.

Fiction :

  • 57-7,000 words maximum
  • 1 story per submission (We will accept the submission of additional stories, if yours is rejected, and you are able to resubmit prior to the deadline.)
  • submissions must be previously unpublished in English
  • We are accepting translated submissions. We are also open to accepting pieces translated into English with the texts written in the original language.

What We Want and What We Don’t Want

We want good speculative works engaging narratives of the Pacific.

Some things we love:

  • Fiction and poetry from or about diverse perspectives and traditionally under-represented groups, settings, and cultures, written from a non-exoticizing and well-researched position.
  • Unusual yet readable styles and inventive structures and narratives.
  • Stories that address political issues in complex and nuanced ways, resisting oversimplification.

Acceptable creative choices:

  • Profanity is acceptable.
  • Sex or violence in a story, if artistically justified, is acceptable.
  • Commonwealth spellings are acceptable.
  • We welcome all sub genres and forms of speculative fiction.

Things we won’t consider:

  • non-speculative horror or romance
  • excessive gore
  • erotica
  • elves
3

Hello and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment center

Some emergency testing may require prolonged interaction with lethal military androids. Rest assured that all lethal military androids have been taught to read and provided with one copy of the Laws of Robotics. To share.

sciencealert.com
NASA has successfully test-fired the engine for the most powerful rocket ever
This is how we get to Mars.
By Bec Crew

NASA has successfully tested the engine that will power its new, massive Space Launch System (SLS) deep-space rocket, reporting no issues across the 7.5-minute duration.

This is the third successful test of NASA’s RS-25 rocket engine, and there will be three more in the coming months - all in preparation for when it will combine four of these monsters to fire humans towards Mars.

Read more… 

sciencealert.com
Students who play video games actually get better academic results
I love study time.
By Peter Dockrill

Despite the old stereotypes about video games rotting your brain, a new study provides the latest evidence to the contrary, with the data showing that gaming every day is linked to improvements in academic performance.

Research in Australia involving more than 12,000 high school students found that, when it came to internet usage, students who regularly played online video games scored higher in maths, reading, and science tests than their peers who didn’t.

“Students who play online games almost every day score 15 points above the average in maths and 17 points above the average in science,” says economist Alberto Posso from RMIT University in Melbourne. “When you play online games you’re solving puzzles to move to the next level and that involves using some of the general knowledge and skills in maths, reading, and science that you’ve been taught during the day.”

Read more… 

Attention all Aperture Science Testing Employees

First off, congratulations to Employee #495340983 for becoming the first person in Aperture Science history to actually die from firing the portal apparatus at the elevator door while being transported to another test. How’d that kill him you may ask? Well, I fired the elevator into space on a crash collision with the moon. 

Second, the get together Employee #1717171717 had yesterday in the video game Overwatch was a success. After barely surviving his punishment for losing, he is ready to be forced to play more. Specific times with be posted here. His battle.net username is Ackerman#1274