democrat: imperialist??? nah Hillary isn’t an imperialist what a— [trips] [hundreds of thousands of US-backed coups spill out of jacket] w-what a fuckign i these arent Hillary’s im just [gathering them up frantically sweating] listen i just listen fuck [thousands of neoliberalisms scatter across the floor] shit fcuk she’s holding them for a friend just listen

Based on my own tags★.

I want a fic with Lilo as flatmates going to a Halloween party. Liam being Liam wants a Batman suit because reasons. Louis is responsible for renting their suits—Liam suspects he’s dating the guy who works there. How else would they get a 50% off?—and will pick them on his way back from work. They’re going as Deadpool and Batman. Or so Liam thinks, till Louis comes back with a Deadpool suit (yay) and a Sexy Bunny (not so yay).

Liam’s mortified.

Li: “Why did you think this would be a good idea?”
Lo: “This was the closet thing to Batman they had, Liam. It’s not THAT different. Look: pointy ears, mask, all-black suit—”
Li: *shrieking* “YOU CAN SEE THE NIPPLES!”
Lo: “Well, it’s called ‘sexy bunny’ for a reason, Payne.”

After hardcore cajoling on Louis’ part, Liam accepts to dress the dreaded thing. He’s going to be masked all the time, and he can’t possibly refuse it when Louis agrees on cleaning the bathroom for the next 6 months. Well, Liam hates cleaning the bathroom. Weighing pros and cons, he can easily trade an hour or two of anonymous embarrassment for 30 hours of NOT cleaning the bathroom. He also would feel bad for paying for the bloody suit for naught. (it’s cheaper than the one he wanted, but still!)

And So Lilo arrive at the party nearly two hours after it started. Liam makes it there with most of his pride intact (he has a coat on till they have to get out of the car). They go in, and not 5 minutes after Louis introduces Liam to his “friend” Harry, Liam’s left to wander and mingle. Hopefully. He’s not really the kind to feel comfortable not knowing anyone there. And Louis had assured him they would stay together, but then it all changed when that mix of Ziggy Stardust and Willy Wonka appeared. But in Harry’s defence, he IS a nice bloke and he’s also giving Liam 50% off.

50% off on a suit that has his nipples out and his parts vacuum sealed.

Wardrobe malfunction aside, let’s say that Liam bumps into a random guy there. Like, literally. He almost ends up spilling soda on both of them. That would’ve sucked because he still has to give the suit back AND he does not plan on paying for any damage; no one’s paying for all his emotional damage when everyone he meets keep staring at his chest.

Like this guy dressed in the batman suit that should be his for this night.

“Eyes up here, mate.”

The guy doesn’t seem fazed. “That’s an… interesting choice.”

*snorts* “Because you stole mine.”

And okay, maybe Liam is being unreasonable, but he /IS/ Batman. He’s now this walking around like “Ariana Grande meets bara manga meets the Hawkeye Initiative” because this guy decided to get the Batman suit. His Batman suit.

But then the guy is incredibly nice to Liam? Like, he confirms he got it from the new shop—in fact, he happens to be friends with Harry, the Ziggy Wonka guy—and apologises (though he really doesn’t have to) for essentially making Liam dress like a sexy bunny. Well, sort of. It seems more like the guy is flirting with Liam, and he looks cute under mask, so Liam accepts the bloke’s apologies/flirting. He accepts it, and soon he’s forgotten about Louis leaving his arse alone in a party he knows no one. He’s more interested in this dorky batman that has more in common with him than either could have guessed.

(Cue for a night of soda, cheesy puns and blatant flirting that ends with them agreeing on a date next week. Everybody is happy.)

BONUS: A Catwoman runs approaches Zayn but he dismisses her with a “Sorry, ’m allergic to cats. I’m more of a bunny man meself.” and leads Liam outside by the waist, saying “Gothan needs us”.

Double BONUS: Everything has been accord to Louis’ plan. And Harry helped, of course. They find Zayn and Liam engaged in some snogging outside.

Ojama-san Liu Liu by Ooya Chiki

It took me several years, but I finally read this comedy masterpiece all the way through!  Every time my Japanese got better, I tried to read it again, and I have finally gotten to the point where I can read it like a normal human being.

Liu Liu is recently orphaned (again!), and she falls head over heels for the playboy who lends her a handkerchief at her aunt’s funeral.  After her suitcase full of money breaks open and bills scatter to the wind, she is forced to move in with her aunt’s eccentric friend, where meets her new love again.  Her aunt’s friend is a bizarre woman who has adopted 99 orphan boys–all of whom are now young adults–and trained them to be the world’s worst orchestra.  She’s also a terrible novelist whose works become best-sellers because, unbeknownst to her, her 99 sons carry out major heists to get the funding to buy endless copies of her books. 

Needless to say, Ojama-san Liu Liu is hysterically funny.  My personal favorite character is Desiderio, in case anyone is wondering.

(Desiderio appreciation)
This Isn’t a Good Idea (Bucky Barnes x reader)

matteblackvevo said: i would like to request a bucky x reader where they go on a mission together and they sleep in a hotel and she plays music and dances and tries to get him to dance with her it’s basically like the dance scene from the movie the man from uncle

You could hear Bucky settling in to the room through the thin walls as you changed into your pajamas, stretching your tired and aching body in a wasted attempt to rid yourself of the harsh mission of the day.  A few scattered bruises colored your skin, coupled with several good scrapes that still stung with the slightest touch or shift in the breeze as you moved, and you wanted nothing more than a good night of sleep.  

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  • Person:So, who do you ship?
  • Me:Ship??? no, I don't ship anyon— [trips] [hundreds of thousands of photos of Emison spill out of jacket] w-what oh fuck i— these aren't mine im just [gathering them up frantically sweating] listen i just listen fuck [thousands of pictures of Emison scatter across the floor] shit fcuk im holding them for a friend jus t listen

my thoughts and notes on the brief lookthrough I did of the Journal: (Warning: contains major spoilers for the end of the book)  In no particular order because my thoughts are pretty scattered.

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Scatter: Part 2

Notes: Bits of fluff, more sexual tension ;)

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Voltrash and Galra theory

Alright, I’ve been into Voltron for two weeks and the show had kidnapped my brain and reduced it to jelly. The Galra!Keith theory has got me REAL bad, so I’ve been noticing all sort of things that could lead to our mullet-paladin being galran.
We have many, many moments during the episodes that let us think of Keith being a possible half-alien (there are lots of people who say he’s half-altean, but that’s not the matter)

You can find all these little clues in this post.

Now, all the comments scattered around the web about Keith being galran that I’ve read never mentioned this particular sequence (the one where Keith concentrate to find a path towards Red in the first episode).
We’ve seen that the paladin is showed a trail of glowing incisions that would lead them to their lion.

This happens for Lance, Pidge and Hunk, but not for Keith.
Keith jus has this weird vision that shows him the exact path he has to follow through the whole ship to get to Red.

At first I thought it might be just because they’re on a ship and there are no incisions BUT Hunk found himself in a cave/mine (probably dug by galrans) and the only visible incision doesn’t light up; nevertheless, the bare ground starts glowing with symbols of the yellow lion.

There is still the possibility that the path isn’t showed up to Keith on the ship because it wasn’t the original place where alteans hid the Red Lion.
Still it is too much of a coincidence.
Besides, we have to take notice that neither of the Paladins feels the presence of their own lion before getting really close and activating the glowing incisions (they find the whereabouts of Blue due to the machinery built by Hunk and the same happens for Pidge and Shiro while looking for Green. Hunk and Lance simply guess when they see the mine excavated by the galrans).

The other one who isn’t showed up any symbols is Shiro, but it can be because the hangar where Black is located automatically opens up when all the other lions are in the Castle.

This still seems too much of a coincidence, in my opinion. It could mean anything or not, but it took me a while to notice (it accidentaly occured to me while watching episode 1 for the nth time) aaand pretty much anyone who support the Galra!Keith theory presume that he has druid powers (as he located Blue’s whereabouts by instinct and before Haggar did).

Yup. Voltron is really messing with my head at the moment.
If we end up with a galran Keith and all of this isn’t just random screenplay I’ll die.

All these rumors about there being a Big Brother season this fall and the complaining I saw made me realize how lucky I am to have a job that allows me to be off every summer.

That being said, the feeds for this “so called season” are going to take a back seat for my education. Grad school is not cheap. And honestly, I hope this “season” is as bad as BB9 so that all my attention is on my schoolwork and The Amazing Race. :)

Broken Pieces

A different take on the song, enjoy :)

Broken Pieces

Michael x Reader

Requested; yes

Michael’s POV

My eyes opened slowly taking in the bright light the windows let into my hotel room. I was shirtless, only wearing my boxers, with the blankets hugging one leg while my other leg was free. I ran a hand through my hair sitting up to find only my clothes still scattered from the night before, but no sign of the beautiful girl who accompanied me. Y/N and I first started off as acquaintances, since she was my music producers daughter and I knew I didn’t have a chance with her. I flirted with her every now and then when she was in the studio watching us, and one thing led to another, and we ended up making out in the studio one day when we were alone. Ever since that day she’d always come to parties with the guys and I, and are intoxicated minds would lead to passionate acts. But the next day, she would always be gone. The first time seemed reasonable, but after coming back to me and sleeping with me over and over again, I’d expect her at least once to stay in bed with me. She started becoming more than a hot fuck buddy, but someone I could be myself around instead of the famous Michael Clifford in the biggest band the world knows of right now. She saw me the way no one else did, as the geeky, video game playing, pizza eating, punk boy.

I decided that this being the 9th time that she’s walked out on me before I could wake up, I would call her and understand why she did that. I needed to understand why she left me in the morning if she said she loved me during the night. Why she would be all over me for hours at a time, but once the morning hit all she left behind for me was a cold side of the bed. I fiddled in my leather jacket pocket for my phone and I found that it was slowly dying so I had to make the phone call quick and get to the point. I realized now that I may have to expose my feelings for her, and I could potentially ruined what we have, and she may even tell her father, ruining the boys and I’d careers.





“Hello?” I took in a deep breathe before speaking.

“Why do you keep leaving in the moring Y/N? You’re all over me when we’re together, and telling me you love me every night when we’re back in this hotel room. I get that we can get a little buzzed but that doesn’t explain why every night you tell me of your feelings, then sleep with me, but continue to leave in the morning and not talk to me for days on end. I just need answers Y/N please.” I said it all in one breathe, feeling my heart racing at what her answer could be.

“Michael, we’re fuck buddies, and I get drunk ok. So I leave before you can talk to me about it. And I wait days to talk to you so you can get over it so we can mindless screw again. That’s all. So don’t ask me again.” And she hung up, leaving me still with unanswered questions. It seems as if she had this answer rehearsed, like she’d been waiting for me to ask this question so she’d have the perfect answer. But I didn’t believe her, I knew her too well to believe that forced answer. I shook my head and grabbed a random pair of sweats and a muscle tank, with my keys, shades and phone in hand, and headed out the hotel room door.

I banged 3 times on her condo door tapping my foot impatiently.

“Y/N open it’s Michael.”

I heard her footsteps approach, and she opened the door quickly wearing a pink silk robe and her house slippers.

“What the hell are you doing here.” She stood with her arms crossed over her chest, but I pushed her aside and huffed standing in her living room.

“If you’re still looking for answers then you’re being stupid, I told you the truth. You’re just mad because it wasn’t the answer you wanted to hear huh?”

“No, it wasn’t what I wanted. Because I know that it’s a lie.”

“How the hell is it a lie?” She yelled in my face, close enough to feel her hot breathe hit me.

“When you lie you get defensive, and you sound scripted, as if you’ve already played this scene out in your head. You would only script this out if you knew something like this would happen. Admit it, you feel the same way about me that I feel for you, you’re just too scared to say it.” My voice fell quiet as I stared into her stained brown eyes. I could see her walls started to crumble because she had been found out. Someone took the time to pay attention to her and her feelings, rather than using her for her body. Before me she slept with a lot more guys, but once she got to me she stuck with me. If she wanted to mindlessly screw, she would’ve left me for good the first night we did the deed.

“OK well maybe I get defensive because I have walls I’d like to keep built. Maybe I tell you I love you at night when we’re drunk because I actually mean it but I’m hoping you don’t remember it in the morning. Maybe I leave you before you wake up so I don’t crawl into your arms to feel the love and warmth I crave for, and I don’t have to think about us being more than fuck friends because I know it’ll never happen Michael! Is that what you wanted to finally here!” She yells flailing her arms above her head, resting them behind her neck. I could see her eyes become glossy, and her breathe came out quick and short. I grabbed her by her shoulders and brought her into my chest, her head resting in the crook of my neck. I felt her wet tears hit my skin and slide down hitting my shirt, and her hands clung onto the dampening cloth.

“I-I…I’m scared Michael.” She cried out.

“I’m scared of finding love again…I’m, I’m scared of getting hurt.”

I rubbed her back with one hand while playing with her hair with the other. She slept with guys to keep the hurt out, she slept with guys to not get attatched but to still feel some sort of comfort and pleasure, she slept with guys so she wouldn’t ever get hurt again because she’d be the one hurting the guys by leaving in the morning.

I sighed before speaking against her forehead. “Who hurt you so bad to make you feel this way?”

She sniffled and pulled away from me wiping her tears before answering me. “I had this boyfriend. We were together for close to 3 years, we were planning on moving in together and even getting married and having a family. Michael he was the one, I knew it in my gut and heart. And one day when I went to drop off an anniversary present at his place, he broke up with me, right at his door. He didn’t even take the gift. He yelled at me to leave, and to not come back. Later, I saw him at one of my family gatherings. And I thought he came to take me back in front of my family to, you know, make a statement that he was worthy of me after hurting me so bad. But I saw him kissing my cousin.” She started sobbing again in her hands, sitting back on her couch. “He left me for my freaking cousin. My own blood.” I sat down next her, still listening to her. My mom taught me girls sometimes like a listener rather than a talker, and I cared enough for Y/N to let her heart out before I said anything. “And now…huh…now he’s getting married to her. She’s having the life I was suppose to have with him! And now I have to see him everywhere, it’s torture Michael. It breaks my heart every single god damn time.”

Bringing my trembling fingers to her chin, I made her look me in my eyes that cared and loved only for her.

“I promise you Y/N, I am nothing like him. I won’t ever, ever, hurt you the way he did. I know you’re scared, I know you don’t want to get hurt, but you have to trust me and know I wouldn’t let that happen to you because of me.” She shook her head looking down at her feet.

“Michael stop you don’t have to-“

“No, I want you to know this. I wait every morning for you to be there still sleeping, so I can wrap my arms around you and just cuddle you. I love being the one to make you smile and blush while pleasuring you like no one else can. I want to do that for you all the time, not just in private or at night in my room. I want to prove to your dad and everyone else that I can make things between us work while I’m in this band.”

I grabbed her forehead and kissed it, her eyes closing trying to stop the tears.

“I’ll find a way to fix these broken pieces Y/N, just trust me.”

“I’m sorry, it’s just going to take some time to learn to trust again.” Her cheek fit perfectly in my hand, kissing her forehead one more time trying to comfort her.

“I get it. Now, let’s order some pizza, play some video games, and listen to some pop punk huh?

Scattered: Part 1

Notes: Starting this new series! there will be smut. Dont worry. Just not in the first part. ;) Sexual tension. This is set in BEFORE Emma and Jefferson reuiniting with Grace. Hopefully you enjoy!

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(If you’d like to be tagged in this series shoot me an ask! im sorry If I forgot anyone!! :((( )

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o-d-d-i-t-y  asked:

whispers cute maybe even nsfw poly widowtracer + a female SO headcanons? My poor gay soul needs more of these gals

My pal. It’s my pleasure.
• you know that feeling when you’re sad, and someone does something good for you and your heart just lights up? Yeah. It’s this relationship
• you get the perfect amount of socializing and home time with those two at your side
• all three of you sometimes go to Victoria’s Secrets/lingerie store and buy each other some sexy stuff, kinda like a secret Santa type of thing.
• books will be scattered all over your house tbh
• you all take turns with house duties, it’s orderly until Widowmaker leaves the room
• Tracer loves to play both of you a song on her guitar
• expect a bouquet of flowers from Widowmaker on your birthday
• “Who’s in love with two lovely women and has a hunk of metal stuck to her chest? This giRRRLLLLL”
• when it comes to cheering you up, each lady has a different approach.
• Widowmaker is more sincere and speaks from the heart
• Tracer is more of a “distract you from the pain” type of gal
• you and tracer L O V E to annoy/prank Widowmaker



FC Barcelona pre-season getaway at St. George’s Park stormed into day three on Wednesday.


With the Catalans continuing to bone up in the subject area of world-class football at the FA’s eden-esque training centre in Burton-upon-Trent, manager Luis Enrique kept a watchful eye on two more workouts, the latter of which had to be completed under shelter following the arrival of scattered showers in the afternoon.

But nothing could wipe away the ear-to-ear smiles prevalent on the players’ faces, as friendly banter and team bonding prevailed under the monochromatic grey skies.

Following a visit by the British football legend, Roy Keane, who met with Luis Enrique, the players were granted their first spell of free time at their Staffordshire retreat.

I would always rather not know

it took
years to unlock
the voodoo secrets
used on me

dandelion vulnerable
in the gales of beratement,
scatters flung
to an open field

I would always rather
not know the motive,
better to be destroyed
by surprise, unprepared

an argus-eyed child
runs before the storm
but knows
the storm is coming

is much more
the torture

anonymous asked:

This isn't a number prompt but can you do one with Holtzmann where she and the rest meet you when you call them to come take care of a ghost problem

A/n: Have no fear my child, I accept all kinds of requests even the ones that aren’t number prompts.

You were the curator of the Queen’s Museum, often staying late into the night seeing over the artwork and just seeking some peace and quiet every now and then.

However, as of late that peace had been majorly disturbed.

You would hear footsteps running down the halls even though you were certain no one else was left inside the museum, other than the guards who hardly ever ran around the show floor unless there was an emergency.

You walked past the main enterence area and saw several off the museums pamphlets and posters scattered across the floor. This mess wasn’t here early, of that you were certain.

These bizarre occurrences kept happening more frequently as the days went by, progressively becoming more hazardous.

Sofas had the been ripped and the insides thrown all over the place, the files you kept in the back office of every peice in the museum had been thrown off out of the cabinets they were in, a few of the pages even ripped to shreds.

It took you and a small team several, several long hours to reorganize and replace the files, and your patience had started to wear thin.

“This is getting ridiculous.” You said as you exhailed to one of your coworker, Rose.

She smiled and closed one of the filing cabinets. “You know there’s this team of woman who take care of this sort of thing.”

That caught your attention. “Oh really? Who are they?”

“The Ghostbusters.” Rose said, turning around and leaning her back on the cabinets. “Give ‘em a call and see what they can do.”

You nodded, logging onto one of the computers and writing down their number. “Can’t hurt.”

You choose to wait until everyone had gone home to dial up the number, tapping your fingers on you desk.

After a couple minutes talking to a strange young man, you had managed to set up an appointment for tomorrow evening after hours.

So for the mean time you just had to hope whatever was causing your issues would leave the artwork alone until it was taken care of.

You were locking the back doorways of the museum the next evening, fiddling with the keys as you waited for the four woman to arrive.

Just as you passed the enterence doors, you heard a loud siren going off and a yellow light flashing through the glass.

You squinted through the dark and saw a white and red car with several peices of equipment on top of it, and on the side an image of a ghost peeking through a no symbol.

“Is…that a hearse?” You muttered to yourself, noticing what kind of car it was.

Stepping outside, you saw the four woman taking equipment from
the back of the car.

“Ah! You must be the curator!” A tall brunette woman asked you with a smile on her face.

You smiled back at her and introduced yourself to all of them. “And yes I am the curator.”

The blonde one smirked and you. “Wow, I should really come here more often.” She said before the woman with glasses elbowed her.

“I’m Dr. Abby Yates, what seems to be the issue here?” She asked as you lead them all up the stairs and inside.

“Well a variety of things like footsteps when no one’s inside, files from inside the locked cabinets being thrown about and torn.”

“And who all has keys to those files?” The other tall one you heard the girls called Patty asked.

“Well just me, I have the key and anytime someone needs to get into the files they have to run it by me first.”

Abby pulled out a tool from her pocket with a glowing bit on the ended that reminded you of a kitchen whisk. “It wouldn’t be a problem if we split up, observe the areas?”

“No not at all, you can let me know if you need any doors unlocked.” You offered.

You saw Abby and Erin walked towards the back of the museum and Patty start by walking into one of the art exhibits.

“Listen, I’m gonna have to ask you to pair off with me for totally scientific reasons that I…do not have time to explain but are totally valid.” Jillian Holtzmann said crossing her arm.

You smiled, nodding at her. “You’re the boss, Dr. Holtzmann.”

She laughed. “Oh yeah, I can definitely get used to you.”