saying that makes me feel weird

Going back to present day.

Done with Flashbacks. Should I reblog the argument before, or just dive right back in? Probs just dive back in tbh.

anonymous asked:

i know this is really dumb but seeing you draw the boys with self harm scars and them just not freaking out about it makes me feel a little less insecure about my own self harm scars. sorry if this is weird it took me 5 minutes to write this because i kept erasing it thinking i sounded stupid so

((Oh trust me you don’t sound dumb at all!!!

I know i say this A Lot in this blog but the reason why i do that kind of stuff is actually to make myself feel better abt having them!! So having other ppl say that it’s helping them as well is honestly one of the best kind of messages i can get. I love all of you tbh))

anonymous asked:

Thog

Sexuality Headcanon: Firmly bi. Doesn’t really have a preference in gender; he can get attracted to anyone and falls in love with personality more than anything else
Gender Headcanon: Trans Man
A ship I have with said character: Do I even need to say it….. Thog x Ashe (tho lots of others too. like thog x markus. or thog x iggy. thog x these hands. there are a lot)
A friendship I have with said character: Thog and Batty being vent buddies (aka thog vents at batty and batty vaguely grunts at him) is one of my favorite things
A NOTP I have with said character: This is like…. a weird unpopular opinion but… Thog x Moren gives me off vibes?? Like I don’t think it was abusive or anything but something about it makes me feel uncomfortable??? Like idk maybe it’s certain interpretations I’ve seen of it but it really isn’t my favorite Thog ship. Don’t mind people who ship it though!
A random headcanon: Thog first learned how to be a strict and cold boss from the ballet teacher he had when he was 5
General Opinion over said character

anonymous asked:

this is a weird question i guess, but i was wondering if you could maybe give me some advice on how to reply to a text i got from a girl i've been making friends with? she said i'm welcome over at her house whenever (i was over earlier) etc, i just get really bad texting anxiety sometimes and i don't want to say the wrong things! i hope i'm not bothering you or anything xx

ah i completely know how you feel! you could respond with something simple like “awesome! thanks,” just to show gratitude and your interest in being her friend

i hate when straight women w short haircuts come into my salon and start joking about having a lesbian haircut/requesting short hair that “doesn’t make them look like a lesbian LOL”

today a straight woman sat down and showed me the picture of the haircut she wanted and she was like “i showed this picture to my husband and he was like ‘wow are you gonna get a girlfriend now’ haha. i love him he’s so ridiculous”

i never know what to say. it feels weird, because i know they say these things to me under the assumption that i’m straight. i don’t know how i’m supposed to respond. “oh don’t worry, you definitely don’t look like a lesbian!” or “omg don’t worry i won’t give you a LESBIAN looking haircut haha”

i can’t just out myself and play along. i do everything in my power to prevent outing myself to any of my clients.

and it feels like some cruel joke is being played on me, like this is straight humor that women laugh about behind our backs. i mean i know it is. it’s just weird being a part of it. i don’t know how to ask straight women to stop joking about butch lesbian haircuts while they’re in my chair. i don’t know what to do when straight women laugh about looking like a lesbian, i don’t really know how to take that, like if it’s a joke at the expense women like me or just harmless commentary. i don’t know what to say, and i can’t bring myself to laugh along with them.

it’s not a subject i want to talk about. i know that makes me sensitive, but i’ve been through a lot of very traumatic experiences because i’m gay. it’s humiliating to perform a service for straight women who seem to think there’s something funny about people daring to think they might be gay

when i’m with you, my mind goes blank.
it’s a bit of a cliche, but like a camera focuses on the most important piece, my eyes can only see the beauty in front of me. i’ve got nothing to say, i feel like i seem weird or creepy staring like i’m taking in deep scenery but it’s just because i don’t have words to describe the way you make me feel.
being with you, being near you. it’s like swinging in a hammock in the dead of summer, thinking surely you could live there forever, never moving, and being completely content.
i look into those deep eyes all i see is the only thing i ever want to get lost in- i listen to your deep thoughts from that amazing mind and all i hear is the meaning that i fell in love with.
i look at you and i see everything i always wanted, but never realized i always needed too.
i know we’re young, i know it’s early and i know there’s no way 
to say 
just how long you can stay
but …
one thing i know for sure 
i’m in love and, for once, i’m not afraid of it.
—  o-h–w-e-l-l 
My 11 year old brother reacts to Hamilton (act 1)
  • Alexander Hamilton: "im Canadian, why do I need to learn about American history?"
  • Aaron Burr, Sir: "ooooh, I like Hamilton, he punched someone and is proud."
  • My Shot: "IM ONLY 11! I DONT KNOW FRENCH!"
  • The Story of Tonight: "is this the only non-rap song?"
  • The Schuyler Sisters: "I ship Burr and Angelica"
  • Farmer Refuted: "HAMILTON ROASTING SOMEONE! NEAT!"
  • You'll Be Back: "killing friends and family to remind them of his love? Sounds like me."
  • Right Hand Man: "Burr should've been his right hand man."
  • A Winters Ball: "are Burr and The Angelica going to start dating?"
  • Helpless: "Aarelica isn't canon, but Hamilton and Eliza are?!"
  • Satisfied: "sounds like someone's jealous!"
  • The Story of Tonight (Reprise): "did Martha Washington actually name her tom cat after him?"
  • Wait For It: "Burr is willing to wait for it."
  • Stay Alive: "IM A GENERAL WHEEEEEEE!"
  • Ten Duel Commandments: "general dude is dead, rip"
  • Meet Me Inside: "meet me inside? More like meme me inside my son!"
  • That Would Be Enough: "awwww, now I ship them!"
  • Guns And Ships: "I'm ta-kifndjwkdjrjdroejcnwkjdndkcjsmekducjwkwkdk. I don't understand what weird French guy is saying."
  • History Has Its Eyes on You: "oh"
  • Yorktown (The World Turned Upside Down): "this would make a very good video game."
  • What Comes Next: "I'm getting bored, can I have my fidget spinner to distract me?(me: NO!)"
  • Dear Theodosia: "I want a Girlfriend like Theodosia, and a brother like Philip."
  • Non-Stop: "HE WRITES BECAUSE HE FEELS LIKE IT!"
Stay for the night

So… I had this idea earlier today and I’ve been working on it since 3PM. I hope you guys enjoy it and please let me know what you think! Lots of love, B xx

The house is empty and silent, much different than when you first arrived and the last bottles of beer and wine have been tossed in the bin just outside of Harry’s kitchen. You’ve managed to tidy things up a bit, make the house less messy than when his drunk guests left almost half an hour ago and now, after washing your hands from the sticky remnants of beer that got all over them while you cleaned up, you can finally try and find him and bid your goodbyes.

When you do find him, he’s sitting on his couch, legs spread open and a hand resting on his tummy, his head tipped back and resting against the back of the couch, a frown on his forehead and his lips pressed in a tight line - if you didn’t know better, you’d say he’s fighting nausea but you know the truth. You know he’s just about to pass out and sleep for the rest of the night on his couch and the only thing he’s waiting for is for you to leave - he’s too much of a gentleman to let you just leave without saying goodbye.

Smiling, you stand between his legs, one knee resting on the small bit of the couch that’s available and you lean forward, hand reaching for the curls that fall across his forehead, your fingers pushing it back in a slow rub against his scalp and he hums in appreciation of the gesture.

“Everyone’s gone.” You inform him, thumb smoothing across the frown lines on his forehead and he relaxes under your touch, his face turning softer, his lips opening around a sigh of contentment. “I’ve cleaned up so you don’t have to do it tomorrow.”

“Didn’t have to.” He says and you can see his sleepy green eyes open to glare at you, but the effect of his intended angry stare is just a grumpy and pouty, too sleepy to look menacing stare. “‘M a grown man, can do my own cleaning.”

“Know you are…” You giggle, cupping his face in one of your hands and rubbing your thumb across his pouty lips. “Just wanted to help.”

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god though… chyler so openly talking about kissing girls irl like it just makes me so happy? she’s so fine with saying it, and saying it didn’t just happen once. and it isn’t a joke or something to just get a laugh, it’s actually something that happened in her life and she’s totally chill actually talking about it and doesn’t make it weird or make it some “sensationalist” kinda thing even if it only happened a few times and it didn’t change her life

and her saying the word lesbian, too. constantly calling alex a lesbian, not just gay. that makes me so happy to hear because she’s so ready to just say it. and most people don’t? they shy away from it like it’s a dirty word because society has programmed us all to feel that way. but it’s a beautiful word and a beautiful thing to be and her saying it so much and as often as she does makes me happy

anyway, chyler leigh makes me happy no matter what she does because she never does anything wrong or bad and is so supportive and amazing and beautiful… god i love her

anonymous asked:

i think the reason people never feel the same way about you is because they subconsciously think youre too good for them. i know this sounds weird but i remember i had to break up with my boyfriend because he was literally too perfect and thats probably why everyone sees you as just so friendly bc if your friendship is so loving just imagine you as an s/o like is it even humanly possible to handle that much love?

Hahaha! Awwwwwww that is very very sweet of you to say, but trust me, I am not too good for anyone. That was a very kind attempt to make me feel better about that situation, but I believe it’s that I just don’t meet the standards of the people I’m interested in. I very much try to be the caretaker in a relationship, but I think there’s still much I have to work on. 

I just wanna say I’m really fucking grateful to the tumblr w/w community for making me feel normal. 

I used to think I was the only one who would watch w/w compilation videos on youtube for hours from shows I didn’t even watch. 

I thought I was so freaking weird for wanting to just spend my time watching shows with w/w couples in them to escape all the heteronormativity around me. 

Thank you for making me feel less alone. 

ummm … why was this video so cute??? why was phil offering up nostalgic stories from his childhood every 3 minutes? why were they so fond of the family bonding time? of picking childrens clothing for dab???? ive not felt true emotions during a sims vid in so long??????? ? anyway here r some thoughts:

  • why did they try to make bowling strike noises for 30 actual whole seconds
  • phil dragging dan for not being able to read the word ‘mirage.’ good
  • the fact that phil kinda sorta equated the connotations of ’mate’ and ‘friend’ with ‘partner’ gave me heart palpitations ahhhhh partner is legit my fav word for what dnp are to each other and to hear it used in the same context as phil’s cheeky use of friend/mate was v affirming
  • apparently a typical dad move, according to phil, is stealing your child’s electronics. when phil got his first iPhone his dad took it and put angry birds on it? for some reason this is vital information to me
  • letting your child have cake on the bed is terrible parenting. both of them agree
  • when phil was a kid he had a toy where you rubbed its back and sparks came out. uhhh cute and also concerning
  • phil singing ‘fireman dan’ made me giggle and simultaneously forced me to reminisce on the fireman pic from their ‘dan and phil go to work’ calendar
  • the wholeeeeee bit where they’re looking through dab’s clothing choices made my heart melt. they are so supportive of eccentric fashion choices and they’re def going to be the dads that let their kids pick out their own clothes and support their choices and their individuality no matter what
  • omg 4:51 and phil saying, ‘you can make references that are old dan’ holy shit this bit. once again i love phil not taking dan’s shit and i love how fucking synchronized that god damn joke noise they make is, like they somehow made them at nearly the exact same microsecond??? and i have so many thoughts about this bc they both tend to make that noise when the other messes up or says something wrong or has a word flub of some sort, and it has always struck me as being something they use to dilute the awkwardness of that kind of misspeak??? like to take the attention away from the misspeak itself and draw each other out of the awkwardness of that moment by making each other laugh w this weird goose noise instead?? which is just??? fucking cute? i feel like in this instance the applicability was that dan didn’t have a retort to phil when phil stood up for himself so instead of just staying awkwardly silent he makes this goose noise (v slightly before phil does) as a way of being like lol this is awk i have nothing to say pls help me here and phil v instinctively/automatically follows as a way of joining in and being like it’s all good, you’re good, this is chill, pls don’t feel awk for not coming up w a witty response, and look now we’re laughing!!! and that’s the purpose that noise generally always serves them?? at least it seems that way to me, but idk like obvi i have no real basis for understanding exactly what the origin and meaning of this reflex is for them, this is sort of just how it seems from the many instances we’ve seen of them doing this. either way overall it’s just such a cute and  warm lil thing they do bc its so obvi instinctive at this point and a shared gesture that makes them laugh and i love it
  • phil wasn’t allowed ripped/distressed jeans when he was younger. those traditionalist lesters staying true to their colors
  • dan thinks phil could be a stylist wow that is like the height of praise coming from the dark prince of fashion himself
  • dan thinks its cute when dab is in the parental bed while phil yells ‘get out’ hahahaha
  • phil used to talk to the monster under his bed bc of course he did
  • ok omg the whole bit starting at 9:30. holy shit y’all. i’m baffled. they’re having what seems like a v benign convo about sleepovers during their youth and talking about the frustrations of having to sleep on the floor and dan says “the older you get, the more you’re like what the hell i’m so uncomfortable i wish i was just asleep right now.” and then wATCH HIM from 9:38 to 9:42 like what is he doing why did he follow up that contextually very chill statement with that intense stare into the camera and pointed sip of his water I’m SO confused. this immediately made me think about double meanings to that statement and the main thing that occurred to me was that it was an allusion to their separate beds,, that the older you get the more you value comfort when you’re sleeping over the fun of having a “sleepover with your friend” and one possible fix for that is sleeping in a separate bed to your “””friend”””???? idk??? am v open to other interpretations tho i have no idea, and like of course maybe dan is just being inadvertently cheeky but idk that jst seemed like SUCH an intentional stare and i am going to be kept up at night wondering what it all MEANS
  • dank brekkerini dan’s right i want to fight him for that
  • phil’s grandma used to cut up apples and sprinkled sugar on them depending on the activities they were doing wow why is his whole family quite literally the sweetest
  • phil correcting dan by pointing out that you could always cook a gourmet meal and dan’s only available response being “well … shut up” wow fucking shots fired
  • dan is incensed at the wasted breakfast bar. why is dan literally obsessed w breakfast bars
  • 12:56 another synchronized moment when they both say brayden in an obnoxious attempt at an american accent
  • i love that they are both immediately in agreement that the only reason to go to a bowling alley would be to play on the ddr machine fuckin nerds
  • martyn worked as a mascot at a bowling alley for his work experience prime lester family trivs. also cute ass mental image
  • their shared reflection about bowling with the bumpers up and the dumb toxic masculinity of teenage boys fuCK YES
  • editing mistake numero uno: they overlaid a backing track for tabitha’s bowling turn starting at 14:27 but then kept the music in for like a full THREE AND A HALF minutes omg (it plays on repeat until 17:57 lmao i was ready to click out of the video it was so annoying)
  • editing mistake numero dos: they do the exACT SAME THING with yet another backing track starting at 19:57 and continuing for like one min this time ugh omg (tbh its kind of fun to see such a blatant reminder that they’re just human beings who were either v jet lagged or v distracted by their fam vacay while editing this)

this video was good. i’m gonna go shower and continue to be haunted by that fucking sleepover comment and dan’s stare. good night 

(sims #40)

Glitch in the matrix moment!

I’m not sure if this can count as a glitch because I’m still very new to the town I’m currently living in and this could just be a case of me misidentifying things in the dark. That said, at the time it freaked me the hell out. 

I was driving home from yoga class the other day, and it was about 7:30 pm so it was pretty dark. I always count the street signs before I hit my street, there are four of them, so I’m pretty sure I didn’t just make a wrong turn. 

Anyway, so I get to the street that I live on, make a right like always… and the street I find myself on isn’t mine. I’ve never even seen it before. It sounds weird to say, but somehow it didn’t even feel like it belonged, like it was a road from a different city entirely. 

I ended up getting myself turned around, and got back home like normal, and I’ve just been thinking about it since. I have a pretty active imagination, so it’s entirely possible I just made a wrong turn and subconsciously embellished the experience, but I still thought it was worth sharing. Either way it was some @sixpenceee shit. 

When I say grief / I mean I’m that weird girl at parties trying to look anything other/ than how I actually feel and not answer “Apocalypse” when I’m asked, / “How are you?” How can it be  possible to cry for a year? / I want to shout at anyone who will listen, “I’ve been crying / for a year! Do you see me?” Grief makes you feel invisible.
—  Tara Hardy, from My, My, My, My, My; “When I Say Grief”
now we dream apart

soulmate au

pairing: jungkook | reader
genre: angst 
word count: 3.291
warnings: none
author’s note: I know I know, another soulmate au, I’m trash. :’) this is just a small story I started working on this afternoon, to get me back on track so I can start working on my bigger projects again. nevertheless, I hope you enjoy!


You don’t know when the dreams begin — but once they do, it feels like they’ve been there since you were born.

The first dream of him revolves around coffee beans. The heavy scent of the morning beverage tangles with the rich shade of chestnut hair and chocolate eyes, turning almost hazel under the glowing sunlight. You can remember a gaze, a nose and full lips turned upwards, but your mind is unable to piece it all together. The face as a whole is blurry in your mind, indistinct, frustratingly vague.

But the memory of those lips moving and pronouncing your name is remarkably sharp, and it almost fools you into believing it is not a dream, but a real memory — that the warmth accompanying his stare existed at some point in your life, that your body did feel the bedsheets tangling around your bare legs as you struggled to move closer to him. That the sound of his voice, rough and mellow, belongs to a living, breathing person and not a figment of your vivid imagination.

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Listen Close (Smut)

Request from anon: A bossy Draco smut where the reader and him kind of hated each other at first, so when they “do it” it’s a very dominant Draco please?

Thanks for requesting, I’ve only done ’smut’ once before so sorry if this is really awkward and a bit bad 😂 plus, I really hope this uploads on tuesday.

Originally posted by nellaey

You’d somehow ended up at yet another Slytherin party. Your friend had convinced your sorry arse to get dressed and go with them to this party that you didn’t really want to go to. You’d lost the match against Slytherin today and you weren’t too keen on showing your face at their victory party, especially considering Draco Malfoy would particularly enjoy mocking you the whole night. Either way, you’d found yourself sat in an overly large leather armchair, throwing  every drink anyone gave you down your neck. If there was anything you were good at, it was partying; you could hold your drinks fairly well and you were usually up for almost anything after you’d had a few. 

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Something weird about watching ‘13 Reasons Why’ is that by the end you’re rooting for Hannah and wanting her to make it and be okay that you almost forget she’s dead and the ending is already sealed. Clay won’t wake up to it all being a dream, she won’t be all “surprise bitch”, she’s dead, and it feels weirdly surprising when the suicide scene happens but you knew the whole time it was coming…