why do girls like buying pumpkin spice lattes, when they can be like me, a man-baby who wants to boycott mcdonald’s for not having a sauce from a tv show that makes me believe i am more intelligent than 99% of the human race?
ok look Hulk takes a lot of energy and all I’m imagining now is everyone is expecting Bruce to have somehow normal, if a bit staggered after transformation, eating habits.
This man does not. He orders extra of everything. He orders a large pizza for himself and finishes it in the time it takes Natasha to eat three slices with no small talk.
“What.” Bruce just shrugs.
“You know how most people grow out of their teen metabolism?” Tony nods. “I did not.” Well, okay.
He wins eating competitions. They host one on TV. The Avengers know what Bruce is capable of doing. They were going to have it between Captain America and Thor, and Tony insists that Dr. Banner join in on the fun. Bruce tries to say no, but hey. They convince him. Besides, it’s not meat, it’s pasta.
“Does the pasta have sauce?” He asks. The TV host smiles and says “of course!” (Because if u do not have sauce on pasta generally u are screwed) and Bruce meekly agrees.
He wipes the floor. He uses Thor’s cape as a napkin. (Thor is not offended, because he has done the Exact Same Thing.) He demolishes the pasta in a matter of about five minutes. Steve is too neat. Bruce is, to put it shortly, an animal when left to eat without abandon. Sauce covers his shirt. But he can pack it away.
America is floored. The world is floored. There’s this shy man who doesn’t talk much, and he just…eats. Like a boss. He can eat anything.
Hulk has a much larger appetite. Tony screams when Hulk downs an entire hot dog cart. (He has no qualms about meat, Bruce does.) When Bruce wakes up, he is horrified by the fact that Hulk ate hot dogs, but eventually looks up to Tony.
“Were they one hundred percent beef?” Tony laughs.