Aries- The type to have a deep, dumb conversation with, make plans with you the day before and then ditch to watch porn, most undependable.
Taurus- The type to keep arguing after they’ve been solidly proven wrong, then eats all your food and jerks it in your bed.
Gemini- The type that prefers online relationships to physical, so they can dedicate themselves to painting or some shit.
Cancer- The type to complain all day that no one likes them while they radiate arrogant sexiness and raw talent.
Leo- The type to buy you a shitload of alcohol just so you can listen to them talk about how great they are.
Virgo- The type to verbally express their fondness of you, while at the same time expressing their preference of someone else over you in present company.
Libra- The type to go above and beyond to please everybody and then get pissed off when everyone gets too comfortable.
Scorpio- They type to act like they’re having a magical time on a date and then not call you back.
Sagittarius- The type who babysits you when you’re drunk, gets in a fight and then sings pagan folk songs to the moon
Capricorn- The person who will fall for anything even though they make straight A’s and stay level headed, will probably grab you by the collar of your shirt if you try to fight someone while drunk.
Aquarius- The type to fall in love with their best friend , abort the lovechild and then get knocked up by a coke dealer at a phish concert in a port a potty, then have that baby.
Pisces- The type to secretly fill your water bottle with vodka when you’ve obviously had too much to drink.