satan get out of here

pwp aus because wth not (NSFW)
  • “i’m a rockstar and you’re a fan who snuck in and do you maybe wanna help me ‘blow off some steam’ back stage because ur A) really hot and B) pretty obviously willing“ au
  • “seven minutes in heaven with my longtime crush but we get locked in for hours bc our friends forgot about us” au
  • “got locked in a walk-in refrigerator/freezer and now we gotta keep warm somehow” au
  • “you’re a vampire with an aphrodisiac bite and i’m the drunk party-goer you decided to snack on tonight” au
  • “you’re really invested in your tv show/book/etc and i don’t think you understand how much your absentminded petting is getting to me but like hell am i gonna ask you to stop“ au
  • “this is an sos from a helpless virgin (who doesn’t want to be a virgin anymore) to you, the most virile person i know. please teach me how all this works” au
  • “i thought you were literally the most innocent thing to ever exist but then you awkwardly ask me to teach you how to bang like a pro and holy hell what the fuck but now i’m really, really turned on” au
  • “i get that it’s hotter than satans asshole out here but if you remove any more clothing i won’t be responsible for my actions-wait. why are you smirking at me?” au
  • “i chickened out of sex ages ago and you haven’t brought it up since but now i really want it, but i’m terrible at communication, so let me just strip shirtless/model lingerie for you until you snap” au
  • “we were forced to hide in this very cramped space (from friends/authority figures/people trying to kill us) and this is a very awkward position to be stuck in with someone you’re avoiding because they’re too attractive for you to deal with” au
  • “normally we duke it out to vent our frustrations but this time someone initiated a kiss in the middle of the fight and suddenly we’re fucking against the nearest flat surface” au
  • “when i asked you to put sunscreen/lotion on my back that’s all i wanted you to do, but your hands are like magic and they have my full permission to wander” au

The Devil’s Temptation

gif is not mine

Title: The Devil’s Temptation

Pairing: Lucifer x Reader

Word Count: 1,125

Warnings: Fluff?

A/N: Things happened today and I apologize for getting this out later than usual. Things here are just not looking up and shit is crazy, but no worries. I will not stop writing. Hopefully I can write enough tonight to have some different fics than Gabriel. I’m trying guys, I am <3 Feedback is welcomed and appreciated <3

The wind whipped through your hair on the cool fall night.  You tucked your hands into your pockets.  You told Sam and Dean that you were going for a walk.  They didn’t need to tell you to be careful; you knew demons were everywhere now.  Your eyes traveled to the abandoned house you were about to walk past.  Your eyes scanned over the property.  You saw what looked like an old friend of yours, standing in one of the windows.

You didn’t think twice about dashing towards the house and barging through the door.  The person you saw was on the second floor of the house.  You padded up the stairs carefully.  You kept a hand on your gun just in case.  As you reached the top of the stairs you could tell the atmosphere was different.  If it wasn’t for the flickering light down the hall, you would have turned back and left.  You slowly walked into the room with the flickering light.  The door abruptly shut behind you, causing you to spin around.  As much as you tugged on the door’s handle, it wouldn’t budge.

“It’s nice to see you again [Y/N],” Lucifer mused.  “You seemed pretty concerned about whoever you saw in the window.”

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Title: I see no eye in this storm 

Rating: T, Natan

Summary: Natalie accidently confesses her feelings for Satan after he shows a softer side but she fears she could have pushed him too far and now he could be gone, again.

A/n: This is by far the most angst that i have ever written, i have no idea how bc it was meant to be cute and fluffy but oh well, there will be a part 2 btw & feel free to tell me whacha think

and since its multiple parts ive posted it to Ao3 right here


Part 1

The rain was falling softly that night, and the moon was almost full so Natalie could see the street from her window as she lay in bed. Only the sound of the rain against the window could be heard from the inside of her dark room.

She had no idea what time it was, it was probably really late but she was having trouble sleeping.

Sometimes late at night when it rained or stormed she would think about her mother. She would come up with all different kinds of ideas of what she would be like, like how she would laugh or how her embrace would feel and she wondered how she would react to Lucifer

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anonymous asked:

I just imagine when Cameron says "you know I have a crippling gambling addiction!" Jasper just screams at the top of his lungs "NO YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH"

Jasper screaming at Cameron to get out of the camp: NOT TO DAY SATAN

i am completely here for jasper losing his shit

Hi my name is Akutagawa Ryunosuke and I have short ebony black hair (I also have an ability!) with white tips and black eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like satan (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Dazai but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a human but my teeth are pointy and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also a mafia member, and I work for the Port Mafia in Yokohama (I’m twenty-one ). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly dark colours. I love the mall and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black coat with a white shirt under it and black pants, and black shoes. I was wearing a white shirt with a cravat. I was walking outside Yokohoma. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. Atsushi stared at me. I put my middle finger up at him.
—  Akutagawa Ryunosuke
  • Dad Puckett: Would you say grace, please?
  • Max: [rolls his eyes, then sees Lefty floating through his kitchen] Oh, my God! [Dad looks up at him] Um... Uhh, O my God...we, uh...thank you for the, uh...food...that...Dad has put in front of us and- [Hissing Pete starts hissing quietly] STOP!...Uh, uh- the devil! From doing bad things? And uh-[P.J. floats behind Max's dad.] get out of here! Uh...Satan? Go! Go...so...that we may live in peace. Amen.
  • Dad Puckett: Amen. That was...hmm...really unusual, Max.

Hi my name is Kurt Wagner and I have short ebony black hair (I can also teleport!) with blue streaks and a long blue tail that reaches my mid-back and sunshine yellow eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like satan (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to warren but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a mutant but my teeth are pointy and white. I have pale blue skin. I’m also a circus performer, and I go to a school called Xavier’s School For Gifted Youngsters in Westchester where i’m in the first year (I’m seventeen). I’m blue (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly dark colours. I love the mall and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a blue sweater with black and red trim with a black shirt under it and brown pants, and no shoes. I was wearing blue lipstick, blue foundation, black eyeliner and blue eyeshadow. I was walking outside Xavier’s. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of students stared at me. I put my middle finger up at them.

I feel like pagans always talking about religious freedom and how it’s being impeded on. Sure, it is.
But can we talk about the mosques and black churches being blown the fuck up? Like, we get called satanic. They get murdered w/out justice. See the difference here?
Priorities people.
Idgaf if someone says I worship Satan or that I’m going to hell. In the words of my grandfather “I’ll save you a seat at orientation ”.
But if you think I’m going to sit here and complacently act like there aren’t Muslims, Hindus, Jewish, and poc Christians, etc getting bombed and targeted you’ve got another thing coming bitch.

kjaerevak  asked:

“i get that it’s hotter than satans asshole out here but if you remove any more clothing i won’t be responsible for my actions-wait. why are you smirking at me?” au

hello yes i wrote this at 6am today after being up all night and this sucks and i didnt really follow the prompt but at least i wrote something after 20 years
also its really fucking hot in here too so yeah i can relate fuck yall and ur snowy christmas

title: hot in here
word count: 462
warnings: swearing 

Jeongguk collapses on the floor, breathing hard and feeling somewhat better; the cool wooden floor against his heated body doing wonders.

It’s the middle of summer and the ceiling fan lazily swirling is only moving the hot air around. To put it simply, it’s fucking hot as hell. And dancing in a practice room with no air conditioning when it’s, like, five hundred degrees is not helping.

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anonymous asked:

Sam, Sam, Sam. Hey, hey... Come here, come here, let me look at you. Oh, hey look, hey look at me it's not even that bad. It's not even that bad, alright? Sammy, Sam! Hey, listen to me, we are going to patch you up, okay... You'll be as good as new. Huh? I'm going to take care of you. I'm going to take care of you. I gotcha. It's my job, right, watch out for my pain-in-the-ass little brother.... Sam... Sam.... Sam! Sammy!